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View Full Version : Funny things to do in a tennis match


NmKnight
04-07-2008, 07:39 PM
Does any1 hav any suggestions of funny things to do or say during a tennis match to get the other team ****ed or just to be an ******* as a joke lol.

circusmouse
04-07-2008, 07:45 PM
Just be yourself.

CantBeBeat2
04-07-2008, 07:48 PM
when you hit the ball make loud grunting noises and when you call out the score do it in a different accent, like british one...

k_liu
04-07-2008, 07:48 PM
Is the line in or out?

RedWeb
04-07-2008, 07:49 PM
Call a good shot "out"... then wait a second or two and complete the sentence... "of reach".

Vermillion
04-07-2008, 07:54 PM
stick your butt out when they're trying to serve

TonLars
04-07-2008, 07:55 PM
Call a good shot "out"... then wait a second or two and complete the sentence... "of reach".

or wait a sec and then say.... "Just Kidding!"
Call another ball out on a huge point, wait for the reaction, and then say... "Just Kidding!":)

vince916
04-07-2008, 08:22 PM
Say No, Nope or Naaaahh to represent balls that are out or faults.

Rickson
04-07-2008, 08:37 PM
Does any1 hav any suggestions of funny things to do or say during a tennis match to get the other team ****ed or just to be an ******* as a joke lol.

Your serve is so weak, my son could return a winner from it with his spongebob racquet. Your groundstrokes are so weak, you consider pushers power players. Andy Roddick laughs at your volleys. You call that a slice, but I call that a lob. It's not a dropshot if your opponent can smash it. Your ball would have been out even if we were playing doubles. I didn't realize that the space between the baseline and the fence was considered good, but now I know why you want that ball to be called in. I think I should stand inside the service box on your 2nd serves.

spiritdragon
04-07-2008, 08:43 PM
^lol, rickson has a lot of time on his hands

quicken
04-07-2008, 08:49 PM
rickson lol very very funny

TonLars
04-07-2008, 09:00 PM
Say No, Nope or Naaaahh to represent balls that are out or faults.

a certain good tennis player from Rapid City has an interesting way of calling balls out like that. I mean, most people, including myself, will say "no" to calls balls out because its quick, easy and natural. But this guy if I remember says something like "Naaay" which is noticeable, but its not really a big deal.

Rickson
04-07-2008, 09:03 PM
rickson lol very very funny

Since you want more:

Your eyes must be bad if Maria Sharapova makes better calls than you.

Why don't we just say the lines are out? Well, at least the ones I hit.

Tell you what, you can have the doubles alley too because you want all your balls that land there to be called in anyway.

Are you sure my ball was out? I didn't realize the baseline got moved up by 2 feet.

lethalfang
04-07-2008, 09:04 PM
Bounce the ball 20 times and then pull your shorts before you serve.

Nellie
04-07-2008, 09:37 PM
When I play with my buddies, I will predicts shots with great accuracy, such as, "I am going to hit this to your backhand and you are going to hit it into the net or you are going to hit long crosscourt." I am right about 80 percent of the time and it kills them

rum02
04-08-2008, 05:17 AM
The only funny thing I've seen on a tennis court is when, in a serious match, one of the players makes really witty remarks, almost as if he doesn't really care what the result is. allow me to elaborate: at some open tourney a black guy and white guy were playing, the match was really intense and every point the white guy would win you'd hear this C"MMMAAAWN! while the black guy would just say really amusing things all the way through, like when he attempted to lob it and the white guy would jump and smash it he'd say : "wow, white guys can jump!?" or he'd attempt an outrageous shot and say: "woh, slow down, I'm not that good." and on match point against him he'd run to the net and the white guy passed him, the black guy yells out a theatrical womanly scream whilst diving for the unreachable pass.

NotAtTheNet
04-08-2008, 06:18 AM
In high school when I knew I had the match in the bag I would point to where I would be returning my opponents serve babe ruth style. This aggravated the hell out of the guy. If I got to triple breakpoint I would sometimes purposely not swing at the ball casey at bat style and then give my opponent a dismissal wave of the hand. This almost always guaranteed a double fault. The kid ratted me out to his coach who ratted me out to my coach who subsequently benched me at our next meet.

A.Davidson
04-08-2008, 06:30 AM
how is that funny or annoying. i do it all the time.???:confused:

Same here. Is that considered rude in some places? What am I supposed to say?

junbumkim
04-08-2008, 07:09 AM
If it's any sort of competition (meaning not against a friend), I rarely do anything besides swinging air at the overhead unintentionally.

Against friends, I have tried fake volley where I look left and go up the line.
I guess I do this on when I return their poor drop shots or when i am already at the net and their shots somehow landed just past the net..

A lot of times, I will call their out-of-reach shot out (usually land about a foot inside the sideline) with a straight face. A lot of times, they will hold back themselves from arguing realizing it's friendly match...I give them a smirk and they then realize I am joking....I usually do this when they are playing exceptionally well.

Djokovicfan4life
04-08-2008, 07:37 AM
If you're losing badly, on the next changeover say "It's about even according to players"!

Vermillion
04-08-2008, 07:39 AM
In high school when I knew I had the match in the bag I would point to where I would be returning my opponents serve babe ruth style. This aggravated the hell out of the guy. If I got to triple breakpoint I would sometimes purposely not swing at the ball casey at bat style and then give my opponent a dismissal wave of the hand. This almost always guaranteed a double fault. The kid ratted me out to his coach who ratted me out to my coach who subsequently benched me at our next meet.

Casey at the bat style is godly

Rickson
04-08-2008, 07:45 AM
I went up against a huge server in doubles and he nearly aced me on his first serve. I was ready for him the next time around so when I got his big serve back, he got ****ed. When he served at me the 3rd time, I forced a double fault, but he refused to accept it by claiming that he never double faults even though his 2nd serve had to be more than half a foot long. What a sore loser.

TENNIS_IS_FUN
04-08-2008, 08:02 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YT714mG17bA

TennisProdigy
04-08-2008, 08:09 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YT714mG17bA

That's how my friend serves when he's stone cold drunk.

NotAtTheNet
04-08-2008, 08:14 AM
Casey at the bat style is godly

The key is to make sure you're looking like you're intentionally not swinging while he serves or else he'll think he got an easy ace. I do exaggerated yawns and stretch my arms out. Its really really funny.

madmanfool
04-08-2008, 10:26 AM
I love to imitate people grunting. I never grunt myself, so when i feel like it, out of nowhere i will imitate them. Suddenly in the middle of the rally after he had a loud grunt or so, i imitate it. I'm pretty good at it too. Two things can happen. Either they can't help their self and start laughing in the middle of the rally. Or they loose their concentration and give me an evil look. In which case i think some people need a chill people.

Also when me and my mate are playing next to a court on which two girls are playing, who grunt, we will often loudly imitate them as well. Funny as hell, but be prepared, those girls can get very *****y about it. If eyes could kill..ouch

jb193
04-08-2008, 12:18 PM
I tell you something that is kind of funny. When you are really mad, and really PO'd at yourself, just take the edge of your racquet and slam it against your forehead about 3 or 4 times. If you are lucky enough to create an open wound, the laughs will come. But, be sure to do this in front of a big audience, preferably a National one on a major TV station, because I don't think this would be as funny with just one other person, however.

NotAtTheNet
04-08-2008, 12:27 PM
I love to imitate people grunting. I never grunt myself, so when i feel like it, out of nowhere i will imitate them. Suddenly in the middle of the rally after he had a loud grunt or so, i imitate it. I'm pretty good at it too. Two things can happen. Either they can't help their self and start laughing in the middle of the rally. Or they loose their concentration and give me an evil look. In which case i think some people need a chill people.

Also when me and my mate are playing next to a court on which two girls are playing, who grunt, we will often loudly imitate them as well. Funny as hell, but be prepared, those girls can get very *****y about it. If eyes could kill..ouch

Man, I've played matches where there were 2 girls playing on the court next to me... it sounded like something out of a pr0n flick... I had the hardest time trying to keep my concentration (pun not intended but then again with tennis skirts...).

Roberto
04-09-2008, 08:44 AM
If you are loosing big time like 0-6 0-3 say: I think you need this score to have a chance.

Pro Staff Pete
04-09-2008, 09:03 AM
Bring some beer(s) on the court during a league game.

madmanfool
04-09-2008, 09:31 AM
Bring some beer(s) on the court during a league game.

oh man, that reminds me. I got a story about that :)

Here in Belgium we play interclub, a team competition in which 6 guys from one club play singles and doubles against 6 from another club. It was last year. I had finished my singles match early (i won 6-3 6-0 i believe, easy match, i was higher ranked so no big deal) and i was watching the other matches from a terras. It was a nice terras. You sat higher than the courts and had a nice view from it. The second man from our team, who carries a few kilos too many was involved in a though match. Now, it was a hot day, and in order not to get hydrated on court he already had a few Duvels (A duvel is pretty heavy , but very nice beer). He was down 5-2 in the fifth, but somehow, just as the week before aswell, he managed to turn it around and still won. The other guy at that point completely lost it. He started trowing his racquet like some crazy mother****er. The other guys from his team where like: "What on earth is he doing??" That's when our second man wobbled of the court, big smile on his face, empty glass in his hand. Meanwhile the other guy was still smashing his racquet. And to top it of, our man went to the terras, sat down and broke the plastic chair he went sitting on:) You should have seen it, absolutely hilarious. I think at this point the other guy was trowing his racquet over the fence or something:shock:

I think we're going to take it a little easier on the beer this year (i speak for myself meanly though), but still it's fun to be this beer drinking team and still beat the other team. hehe..just the bill after is always higher in our team? Strange...

NLBwell
04-09-2008, 02:55 PM
Back in the days when we always had to wait for a court on the public courts, my brother would chase people off by pointing at them and then yelling things in French or Spanish. They were usually things like "le cochon mange le professeur" (the pig eats the professor) or "la vache et dans la valise" (the cow is in the suitcase) that made no sense, but usually people would leave quickly.

In high school, when we thought the other team was being jerks and wanted to get under their skin, when they would hit a ball out we would call, "Out, No, Long, Fault, No Good, Bad, Missed, (etc.)" every time.

Kaptain Karl
04-09-2008, 03:27 PM
I remember a singles match two years ago where I was hitting the *snot* out of the ball ... and everything I hit was landing about two balls OUT all around the court. I kept telling myself "You're swinging well. Your timing will return any minute."

On the 0-6, 0-3 changeover I asked him, "Do you give up yet?"

He actually fell down laughing....

I still lost, but 0 & 5 was a lot more respectable than where it *was* headed....

_____________


If you are playing someone who is playing "out of his tree" and you want to use some (almost questionable) gamesmanship, get him thinking about what he's doing....

... "You've hit four 1st Serves in-a-row." You're really *on*"!

... "You're serving like a monster. Do you inhale or exhale as you swing?"

... "How'd you cure that chronic foot-faulting problem? You used to step on the line all the time. Now you seem to be doing great."

... "You're playing too well. I'm making my line calls tighter...."


Some people "come down to Earth" when you employ these tactics. (But they'll hate you for it....)

- KK

ThA_Azn_DeViL
04-10-2008, 04:25 PM
In one of my tournaments i was playing a friend and i kept grunting like a girl, the girls on the other court couldnt concentrate and were yelling at me, but it was helluva fun time.

Babb
05-04-2008, 07:06 PM
When I'm trying to anger people, I say "Nope!" on my line calls.

And one time, my winning or losing was based on whether I could make my opponent mad. He missed an easy volley and yelled, "What are you doing?!?!?!"

And I said out loud, "That's a good question."



But normally I'm a nice guy on and off court. Unless I'm playing really badly, then I'm very emotional.

onehandbh
05-04-2008, 08:57 PM
... "You're playing too well. I'm making my line calls tighter...."

- KK

This might be misinterpreted to imply that you are going to start cheating
a little bit on the close line calls.

Bounce the ball 2000000 times before your next serve. Hopefully play
will get suspended due to darkness and your opponent will lose a little
momentum.

Take three multi-vitamins before the match. Then pi$$ on the balls to make
them extra optic yellow. Do this after you've completed your service game.

thejackal
05-05-2008, 04:55 AM
Back in the days when we always had to wait for a court on the public courts, my brother would chase people off by pointing at them and then yelling things in French or Spanish. They were usually things like "le cochon mange le professeur" (the pig eats the professor) or "la vache et dans la valise" (the cow is in the suitcase) that made no sense, but usually people would leave quickly.


that reminded me of a kid in my french class last year. he'd say random things like that in class to the teacher. pure gold.

Kaptain Karl
05-05-2008, 05:46 AM
This might be misinterpreted to imply that you are going to start cheating a little bit on the close line calls.Umm, that's the point. You want him to infer you're going to be cheating. (It gets him worrying about you ... and maybe takes him out of "the zone" he's been in the last four games or so....)

You *did* notice my disclaimer that these tactics could be considered "questionable," right?

- KK

Kaptain Karl
05-05-2008, 05:50 AM
(After he's smoked you in two of his Service games....)

"Wow! That hitch in your Serve is almost totally *gone*. It's really coming along...."

- KK

Trainer
05-05-2008, 06:25 AM
Hit your netman in the ***** on your serve. That always gets a laugh.

ryangoring
05-05-2008, 09:44 AM
f-a-r-t really loud when your opponent is serving and make sure he's down wind from you and he hears it!!

willgonase10
05-05-2008, 12:22 PM
- Inspect the ball while serving. Make sure you get every speck of dust and dirt off of it. :)

- Wear a skirt or dress.

- Tell your opponent he is hot.

Babb
05-05-2008, 12:43 PM
^^^^^^^
You should visit this thread.
http://www.cisclan.com/photos/1531_fail.jpg



Okay, okay, I'm just joking.

Moz
05-05-2008, 01:05 PM
I love to imitate people grunting. I never grunt myself, so when i feel like it, out of nowhere i will imitate them. Suddenly in the middle of the rally after he had a loud grunt or so, i imitate it. I'm pretty good at it too. Two things can happen. Either they can't help their self and start laughing in the middle of the rally. Or they loose their concentration and give me an evil look. In which case i think some people need a chill people.

Also when me and my mate are playing next to a court on which two girls are playing, who grunt, we will often loudly imitate them as well. Funny as hell, but be prepared, those girls can get very *****y about it. If eyes could kill..ouch

You think people should chill when you are taking the **** out of them? You're surprised when people on the court next to you get annoyed when you mimic them? Carry on and at some point someone is going to stop their play and beat the crap out of you.

You will probably let out a genuine grunt then.

I hope to God you are less than 16 and you grow out of this fast. Tool.

itsstephenyo
05-05-2008, 01:31 PM
A friend of mine will yell "Ouch!" when someone hits a winner that's close to the line. Never in a real match, though.