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View Full Version : I Hate You Full Western Grip!!!


lordmanji
07-25-2008, 12:25 PM
Dear Full Western Grip:

i want to quit you. i have had enough. before i met you, i was happy with my semi western sweetheart. but you came along so sneakily into my life with your high-bouncing swag. you were my first crush before i even knew it. you were the glove that completed my hand. but after our passion died down love ended, my life has undergone peculiar stresses. i didnt know it at first but little by little i began to suspect it was you: shots i hit so easily before that would go into the net or into the back fence. only when im in perfect condition can i please you. i used to try to be perfect but i realized that i cant and im not. you're just too high maintenance and i have only so much energy to go around.

and i have a secret to confess: you mightve suspected it already but recently i secretly made contact with my semi western sweetheart again. it was rough at first. i felt so guilty seeing her again. and i think she was still mad at me and i didnt know really how to handle her anymore. but as our dates - yes dates - progressed, we became more comfortable with each other. just like the old times. finally im starting to become happy again. she's so less demanding than you. when im out with her, i feel like i can do almost anything and be forgiven for it. i can go farther with her with less effort and she doesnt tease me by making me feel good sometimes - with her, im consistently satisfied.

sure, she's not as unique as you are. when im out with you, i feel like everyone notices me because of you - they just cant believe it when they see someone like me with his hand around someone like you. and i remember the times people would ask me if my hand didnt hurt holding yours - ah, those were the times. but this relationship has too many ups and downs. i feel like im a manic depressive being with you. i just want to be my best but i cant be that with you.

so this letter is to inform you that i am dumping you. after several years of struggling to make things work, ive realized its not me - its you. some guys like it better under the handle, others like it just on top. i am one of those guys. i know you will do fine without me. there are plenty of other men out there for you to steal as you did with me. maybe theyll be able to subdue you. i couldnt. it will be hard to quit you but i dont have a choice. and im sure i'll see you pop up every now and again in my life but i truly hope that you wouldnt.

so this is my farewell to you, my fiery flame, my gamewrecker. it was exciting while it lasted but i sincerely hope that i never see you again.

With much love and scorn,
Your Manji

Bungalo Bill
07-25-2008, 12:30 PM
Dear Full Western Grip:

i want to quit you. i have had enough. before i met you, i was happy with my semi western sweetheart. but you came along so sneakily into my life and ever since then you have wreaked havoc. i didnt know it at first but little by little i began to suspect it was you: shots i hit so easily before that would go into the net or into the back fence. only when im in perfect condition can i please you. i used to try to be perfect but i realized im not. you're just too high maintenance.

and i have a secret to confess: you mightve suspected it already but recently i secretly made contact with my semi western sweetheart again. it was rough at first. i felt so guilty seeing her again. and i think she was still mad at me and i didnt know really how to handle her anymore. but as our dates - yes dates - progressed, we became more comfortable with each other. just like the old times. finally im starting to become happy again. she's so less demanding than you. when im out with her, i feel like i can do almost anything and be forgiven for it. i can go farther with her with less effort and she doesnt tease me by making me feel good sometimes - with her, im consistently satisfied.

sure, she's not as unique as you are. when im out with you, i feel like everyone notices me because of you - they just cant believe it when they see someone like me with his hand around someone like you. and i remember the times people would ask me if my hand didnt hurt holding yours - ah, those were the times. but this relationship has too many ups and downs. i feel like im a manic depressive being with you. i just want to be my best but i cant be that with you.

so this letter is to inform you that i am dumping you. after several years of struggling to make things work, ive realized its not me - its you. some guys like it better under the handle, others like it just on top. i am one of the guys. i know you will do fine without me. there are plenty of other men out there for you to steal as you did with me. it will be hard to quit you and im sure i'll see you pop up every now and again in my life but i hope that you wouldnt.

so this is my farewell to you, my fiery flame, my gamewrecker. it was exciting while it lasted but i sincerely hope that i never see you again.

With much love and scorn,
Your Manji

What the...are you okay Manji?

nytennisaddict
07-25-2008, 12:48 PM
That, my friend was the most creative way I've ever heard someone say, "I'm switching from western to semi-western grip".

Simply awesome, thx for sharing.

:)

bhupaes
07-25-2008, 12:58 PM
Dear Full Western Grip:

i want to quit you. i have had enough. before i met you, i was happy with my semi western sweetheart. but you came along so sneakily into my life and ever since then you have wreaked havoc. i didnt know it at first but little by little i began to suspect it was you: ...

[...snip...]

so this is my farewell to you, my fiery flame, my gamewrecker. it was exciting while it lasted but i sincerely hope that i never see you again.

With much love and scorn,
Your Manji

Hey Manji, I could've told you that unfaithful !@#$% was no good! That's why I dumped her! :)

nytennisaddict
07-25-2008, 01:05 PM
Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, I too dumped Ms. Western. No remorse. I do miss her from time to time particular when I'm playing on European vacations (clay), but I manage.

Djokovicfan4life
07-25-2008, 01:16 PM
You made the right choice. Semi western is the greatest thing since sliced bread.

FloridaAG
07-25-2008, 01:34 PM
Don't worry full Western, I will never leave you. I tried once and it did not take, so I am stuck with you for good.

r2473
07-25-2008, 01:37 PM
I change my grip a lot in the middle of a point. I had an opponent notice this a month or so ago. Most people don't notice and wonder why some of my shots bounce really high (full western), some kind of high (Semi), and so on. It is actually a natural reaction for me now, based on what kind of ball I get, where my opponent is on the court, and what types of shots my opponents hate the most.

When playing against my "spin happy" opponents, I hit a lot of Continental grip slice shots (and mix in some full western just to keep them off balance). The exact opposite with my "pusher" opponents (because they often have trouble controlling the spin and pushing back with sufficient depth and placement).

My "bread and butter rally shot" is still just the good ol' Semi-western.

So, I would say, don't dump the Full Western. Just don't use it all the time.

Vermillion
07-25-2008, 01:39 PM
I fell into the trap of falling for Miss Western again after switching to Miss Semi-Western...

Never again...

Andres
07-25-2008, 04:01 PM
Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, I too dumped Ms. Western. No remorse. I do miss her from time to time particular when I'm playing on European vacations (clay), but I manage.
Sounds like Mrs. Western is a playa'. Or a wh0re, who knows? :p

Bagumbawalla
07-25-2008, 04:24 PM
"High-bouncing swag", well put. If your tennis career ever folds, you might consider a more literary pursuit.

autumn_leaf
07-25-2008, 04:54 PM
wow. very creative. but having ms.western for years? you just didn't know when to leave. i tried her for one day and left lol.

2nd_Serve
07-26-2008, 10:54 PM
LOL. Nice way to say you quit the western ahahahaha.

djweenie
07-26-2008, 11:43 PM
What?! Western Was Cheating On Me With You?!

Il Mostro
07-27-2008, 04:23 AM
I think a lot of us have experienced painful urination because of Ms. Full Western Grip. What a trifling *****.

thundaga
07-27-2008, 05:16 AM
gutless... Miss F. Western deserved better than being dumped via a letter.