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View Full Version : Emancipating your parents a good idea? Opinions on this!


Ballinbob
12-31-2008, 10:16 AM
Okay I get it, it's a bad idea. I'm not doing it and I'm going to talk with my parents and work things out.

I am still AMAZED at some of the responses though. Did I ever do anything to you guys for me to be treated like this? I would love to get more opinions, but it looks like the majority of the posters here just like putting people down. Look at ollinger and mikeler's posts and compare them to the others. I'm sorry for posting this. I will make sure to never post anything about myself in these forums ever again. I'm sticking to the tennis tips/instruction section of the forums. That was the main reason I joined these forums anyway...

I assure you you'll never hear from me again. So in the meantime you guys can go have fun putting down other people younger than you, I'm not going to stop you

Breaker
12-31-2008, 10:33 AM
Uh...no.

Apparently they've pampered you too much. Giving you 15 years of providing literally EVERYTHING for you and you want to "divorce" them because for some reason you can't see how much they have cared for you. This is a terrible idea and you would almost surely regret it.

Perhaps your parents should have beaten some sense into you when you were younger :neutral:

raiden031
12-31-2008, 10:33 AM
I think its a bad idea. You didn't really specify what is so bad about them, other than you don't like them. If I remember correctly, did you post once about being one of those guys from an asian family where your parents don't want you to do anything but study? If so, I don't think thats a reason to emancipate from them. You should try talking to them about the importance of the other parts of your life other than just studying such as learning social skills and having a competitive drive, all important for the professional working world. You should just rebel and do what you want sometimes and you will have to fight with them, but thats part of growing up. In the end there may be times where you will want them in your life, either because you are lonely or need financial help or whatever. You might develop more respect for them as you enter adulthood and really understand the sacrifices they have had to make to be a parent.

Joeyg
12-31-2008, 10:39 AM
It must be nice to be 15 and that arrogant. You have no emotional attachment to your parents? You should be forced to work with kids who have been abused by those closest to them. Perhaps then, you will realize how foolish you sound.

knasty131
12-31-2008, 10:41 AM
I take care of someone (at 16 yrs old) who has emancipated their parents and im 22...while he may have fun, in the end it won't be the best decision I don't believe. I think sticking through this will make you stronger and in the end will build more character depending on how you handle it.

I don't think you have an idea what it is like without parents until you have already made the choice and very possibly will regret it in the long run.

Ballinbob
12-31-2008, 10:51 AM
Some harsh replies:shock: The more opinions the better though so keep em coming. I have not decided on anything and I'm posting this because I want to see how stupid/smart this that's all. Raiden yes I have asian parents and yes all they care about is studying. They're from Lebanon and are pretty strict (like GWB's parents if you read that thread). My dad moved away from Lebanon during the civil war and went to Canada not knowing english at all....and somehow he managed to pull of a P.H.d in geography and works at a respectable college here in Colorado. He's went through alot in his life and is really strict, except I don't think he knows exactly how strict he is. Once again, I have not descided on anything and I learned about this just recently. I may very well not do it. I just want advice.

Also, lets stop with the name calling and just keep it nice.I have no idea what it would be like to be emancipated and I just want everyones opinion. I don't want this to be a thread saying that I'm arrogant and stuff. No need to be this rash with me

Ballinbob
12-31-2008, 10:56 AM
I take care of someone (at 16 yrs old) who has emancipated their parents and im 22...while he may have fun, in the end it won't be the best decision I don't believe. I think sticking through this will make you stronger and in the end will build more character depending on how you handle it.

I don't think you have an idea what it is like without parents until you have already made the choice and very possibly will regret it in the long run.

Awesome, glad you posted this. If I was to descide to be emancipated this is what I would do too (find someone who's living by themselves in their 20s). Some questions regarding the kid your taking care off. Some questions regarding the kid your taking care of...

1. Is he a happy kid overall or is he depressed alot?
2. Why did he choose to be emancipated?
3. Is he a good student and does he have a job?
4. Would you say he has a pretty stressful life?

Thanks

ollinger
12-31-2008, 10:57 AM
I would advise against emancipation. You may not like them but you have an attachment to them that you are too young to fully comprehend. This would do irreparable harm to that relationship You will feel yourself to be odd and freakish as you grow into your later teens and older and see the importance of those relationships to friends and colleagues. You will shortchange any children you might have by denying them an extended family. If you hope to have a relationship with a woman someday, she will see this act as a sign of your immaturity and inability to tolerate the imperfections of relationship, and she will correctly want nothing to do with you. The true mark of wisdom is to realize what you DON'T know, and at your age that far exceeds what you DO know.

Photoshop
12-31-2008, 11:02 AM
-My parents never abused me at all and are good to me, but strangely I don't feel the slightest bit of an emotional connection to them.

You're just a dumbfvck.
Then I thought about when i was rejected by this girl and even though I'm over it, I still had stronger feelings about that than my parents.

You are the most pathetic piece of sh1t in the world. I really do feel sorry for your parents.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/images/beatkid4.jpg

sureshs
12-31-2008, 11:06 AM
Can you get a job if you are 15? Can you get a credit card? Will anyone rent you a place? Are you even eligible to sign a rental lease? You can't even get a driver's license. So you will be going to school, then working somewhere part time and taking the public transportation there, and staying as a cash-paying guest in some apartment. Everywhere you go, people will ask for credentials - no one trusts 15 year olds. In the end, you might end up dropping out of school. Also don't underestimate the evil forces out there - there are people looking to recruit youngsters for drugs and other stuff.

alcap26
12-31-2008, 11:07 AM
Way to be grateful for what your parents have provided you.

Ballinbob
12-31-2008, 11:10 AM
Why can't people just tell me "it's a bad idea because this,this, and this" instead of saying I'm a dumbfvck?

Maybe I should just talk to my counselor at school and just drop this here. I've never been treated like this on these forums ever, and I don't think I've done anything bad for people to go and cuss me out. It seems like I, a 15 year old, am alot more mature than alot of the adults here.

Photoshop, i sure hope you feel good about yourself now because you put down a 15 year old. Good job buddy keep at it! Your such a cool guy, just keep doing what your doing!

Ollinger and Raiden, thanks for your advice. I appreciate you not cussing me out and telling me what you think. I will talk to my counselor at school Monday when xmas break is over and then i will talk to my parents and just clear the air with them so we can restore our relationship.

"If you hope to have a relationship with a woman someday, she will see this act as a sign of your immaturity and inability to tolerate the imperfections of relationship, and she will correctly want nothing to do with you"

I thought this really helpful olinger. Never thought of it that way. Thanks for your post

edit-im closing this thread really soon. I have no idea why people are treating me like this and telling me im a dumbfvuck! Just give me reasons why not to do it and leave! No need to call me names, my god Ive never done anything to anyone on these forums and this is what I get? How about helping me instead of putting me down, ever thought about that guys!!!!

mikeler
12-31-2008, 11:13 AM
Bob,

Bad idea! Most teens naturally get disconnected from their parents. A buddy of mine has a daughter who is about your age and he calls her room the hibernation chamber. She comes out for food and goes to the bathroom. Otherwise he never sees her. I used to do the same thing as a teenager. I just wanted to be by myself a lot.

You have probably heard this a few times before, but you have the rest of your life to work. Enjoy getting out of high school early in the afternoon and then heading off to run track or play tennis. Unless you end up being a teacher, you'll probably not get Xmas break, Spring Break and 3 months of vacation in the summer ever again!

When you take any new job especially as a youngster, we have a saying in my business that shi t flows downhill. You are going to get the worst hours for the lowest pay. You have a good GPA that will allow you to go to college which is a great time in life. There is a good chance you'll develop a long term relationship with a woman in college and you'll end up starting a career that you'll enjoy rather than just a job.

My 2 cents.

mikeler
12-31-2008, 11:14 AM
Don't let these other posters get to you. Do take what the core of their argument is in that you should appreciate what you have.

Ballinbob
12-31-2008, 11:26 AM
Thank you mikeler. You see that guys, he told me he thinks emancipation is a bad idea and gues what! He didn't have to put me down or cuss me out in anyway to get his point across! Now isn't that something!

Anyway, I just found out you could do this like last week and I thought it was interesting. Like I said I haven't committed to anything. I wanted to get opinions on this and that's it. I'm asking everyone I know about this and so far the majority have been saying it's a bad idea. Your right though, I have alot of time to work and stuff. I plan on talking to my counsler, then talking to my parents to see if I can get everything sorted out with them. Maybe if I "clear the air" with them things will get better. That's what I plan on doing so far

edit- I like the new avatar

Fee
12-31-2008, 11:27 AM
Yes, you should definitely become an emancipated minor as soon as you can. There is no reason your parents should be forced to emotionally and financially support someone who seems to be as completely ungrateful as you are. Make sure you leave all the clothes and everything else they have ever provided for you behind when you leave.

You think this thread is harsh on you? Wait until you get out into the real world, this thread is nothing.

sapient007
12-31-2008, 11:35 AM
i have a bucket of bleach for you to drink if you decide to go through with this.

free too..

mikeler
12-31-2008, 11:39 AM
Communication is always best Bob. Take Fee's point to heart, it is a tough world out there. The older you are when you have to take it on, the better. As for the avatar, I was trying to make a point in one of those 1 handed backhand threads and stumbled across that pic.

goober
12-31-2008, 11:39 AM
I would also say don't do it.

You have no idea of how hard it will be if you are on your own at 15. You might think its cool I can do whatever I want, but the reality is if you are supporting yourself and trying to go to school *all you are going to be doing is work and school.*

It won't be as much freedom as you think. Certainly not the type you envision. What happens to a lot of people in this situation they just let their school go because it is easiest to do so. Most teenagers goes through a stage where they can't stand their parents or don't get along with them. You can be on your own when you are 18. What is the rush? Unless you are being abused or something horrid, which you are not, you don't realize how good you have it.

What you need to do is start thinking about the longer range future. What do you want to do with your life. How are you going to get there? What can I do now in high school to help me get there. Get focus and get goal oriented. Ask yourself how is being on your own at 15 really going to help me? For most kids the answer is it won't.

mikeler
12-31-2008, 11:44 AM
Goober is right Bob. The independence part sounds enticing, but you will have no time to enjoy it because you'll be working all the time.

Julieta
12-31-2008, 11:45 AM
Don't do it. Believe me you will regret it.

There is a guy who posts on this forum who is half Lebanese I think....I forgot his alias but I think its Pro Tour something. Maybe you can talk to him about some of the stress you're feeling growing up in a strict household? I grew up in a very strict household and one with a lot of double standards and at times it was very hard to take. But now that I am older, I understand a lot more about my parents and while I would do some things differently if I have my own family, in others I would be just as strict.

I do think it can be hard also when one of your parents has suffered. One of mine did also and I always felt like I couldn't complain about life because I had it so much easier. I don't know about the Lebanese community but in the Latino community you do find some kids with depression and most dont feel they can express feelings if their parents had hard lives. You just dont feel entitled. I have also always had a very hard time showing any vulnerability or fear because I saw it as a sign of weakness - I always felt like I had to be strong all of the time.

All I can say is definitely talk to professionals and think long and hard about the long term impact of what you're doing. Eventually you will be on your own and you will get plenty of time to run your own life. Then you'll wish you had the extra time to do things like play tennis versus working all of the time.

mikeler
12-31-2008, 11:49 AM
I'm jealous right now seeing all these kids out for Xmas break. I remember the days. Sigh...


Don't do it. Believe me you will regret it.

There is a guy who posts on this forum who is half Lebanese I think....I forgot his alias but I think its Pro Tour something. Maybe you can talk to him about some of the stress you're feeling growing up in a strict household? I grew up in a very strict household and one with a lot of double standards and at times it was very hard to take. But now that I am older, I understand a lot more about my parents and while I would do some things differently if I have my own family, in others I would be just as strict.

I do think it can be hard also when one of your parents has suffered. One of mine did also and I always felt like I couldn't complain about life because I had it so much easier. I don't know about the Lebanese community but in the Latino community you do find some kids with depression and most dont feel they can express feelings if their parents had hard lives. You just dont feel entitled. I have also always had a very hard time showing any vulnerability or fear because I saw it as a sign of weakness - I always felt like I had to be strong all of the time.

All I can say is definitely talk to professionals and think long and hard about the long term impact of what you're doing. Eventually you will be on your own and you will get plenty of time to run your own life. Then you'll wish you had the extra time to do things like play tennis versus working all of the time.

Fee
12-31-2008, 11:52 AM
Costs of emancipation: (estimated)

Court fees: $1000.00
Rent (1st and last) + security deposit: $1500
Pots, pans, cutlery, towels, bed linens: $450
Learning to cook your own food: ???
Utility bills (no cable, no internet): $80 per month
Groceries: $175 per month
Bus pass (you don't own a car): $120 per month
Cell phone: $60 per month

Living with parents who pay for everything (including college probably) even if they 'don't get you': priceless

Julieta
12-31-2008, 11:55 AM
I'm jealous right now seeing all these kids out for Xmas break. I remember the days. Sigh...

Exactly. Playing tennis all day...working on the tan...much better than flipping burgers or whatever kind of job this kid will be able to get in this economy. Can you imagine?

Ballinbob
12-31-2008, 11:56 AM
Lol mikeler it's a 2 week break and its over before you know it. For me it started the 19th of dec and im going back monday. The 3 months in summer is nice though.

And yeah you guys are right, its a bad idea. For me at least it is. I guess if I was being abused it would be different but I'm not. I'll just have to find a good time to talk to them and try and work things out. I just wanted some advice. Among everyones bull***** there are some helpful posts and I appreciate them.

Well I'm going to the courts now to film my serve then post it. I got a bad angle yesterday so I'm going to see if i can get a better one.

edit-fee, I get what your saying. You were being a little rough to make a point and I appreciate it. But photoshops post and some other people's posts....wow..

retrowagen
12-31-2008, 11:58 AM
I was in your position when I was 15, and like you I took the time to think things through. I'm now 39 and glad I took courage with my own hangups and unmet needs (one of my parents left when I was 7; the other was basically a nutcase after that and wasn't really there for my siblings and I, emotionally, financially, or otherwise) and stayed in as best a relationship with my parent as possible.

As you get older, you definitely want them in your court. You don't have to worship the ground they walk on, but when you enter your 30's and have a family of your own, you will want strong relationships with them, for your sake, and for your family's.

When you "emancipate" yourself from your folks, you are effectively sending them a message that you feel they have failed in parenting you and that they are unworthy of being your parents anymore. You are abandoning them. That is unbelievably harsh. It would be like if they had one day, out of the blue, came into your room and told you, "We're sorry, you haven't developed into the son we wanted, so we are placing you in foster care now. Bye."

Think of the damage you will put into the relationship; wounds which may never heal. Believe me, it is far better to feel a little numb about your folks at age 15 (which, I might add, is pretty normal for a teenager; it's part of the leaving the nest process which builds up over many years), than to deal with the fallout of rejecting your parents for the rest of your life.

Of course, if they have been abusive and your concern is prompted by fears for your own safety, then yes, go to your HS councilor right away, and you'll get the help you need. But it sounds like your folks really like you and take good care of you (which is something most kids would give their right arm for!). You could also learn alot from the things your dad has been through. It sounds like he is a man of very strong character, an example of never giving up in life. I hope in this case, you won't give up on your folks.

Keep the faith, little bro. It's a tough world out there.

Fee
12-31-2008, 12:03 PM
Well I'm going to the courts now to film my serve then post it. I got a bad angle yesterday so I'm going to see if i can get a better one.


Okay, this entire thread was a joke wasn't it?

HOW GOOD IS YOUR LIFE?

I'm just...

Ballinbob
12-31-2008, 12:16 PM
Okay, this entire thread was a joke wasn't it?

HOW GOOD IS YOUR LIFE?

I'm just...

Yes I joke about being emancipated all the time:confused::confused:

And I have a pretty good life, just a bad/nonexistent relationship with my parents. Usually all the threads I post in this section about my life end up with me looking like an idiot lol. I guess its for a good reason though. This thread was probably unnecessary and I could have come to the right conclusion if I thought about it a little more. Oh well, what's done is done.

Fee
12-31-2008, 12:42 PM
Yeah, I know I was a bit harsh, but you seemed to be in need of a bit of shock therapy. If you were standing in front of me I would have just shaken you a bit, but over the 'net, I had to use words.

A bad relationship with your parents is de riguer for teenagers, everyone on this board would probably agree with you. It sucks, in many ways, especially since it would seem normal that as the adults they would take the lead in creating a good relationship. Sadly, it doesn't always work that way. Talk to a counselor, and maybe consider family counseling to jumpstart the communication. Your parents obviously want the best for you, they want your life to be easier than thiers was, but for whatever reason they cant be warm and fuzzy about it.

Just don't end up being one of those people who 'don't know what you got until it's gone'. That is one of the hardest lessons to learn in life. :)

You took the slings and arrows that were flung at you in this thread pretty well. Give yourself credit for that. You seem to smart and tough, I'll bet that you will work your way through this and 12 months from now you'll come back to this thread and get a chuckle out of it. Happy New Year Bob.

Dedans Penthouse
12-31-2008, 12:43 PM
Ballinbob,

Getting a 'gig' that pays well enough at 15 to support and allow for "leisure room" in your life ain't happening unless you're the next Jonas Brother or Hanna Montana, so I can't really see the benefit of flying-the-coop at this stage 'cause there won't be much ballin' going on in your "per hour wage" life....not at 15.... :neutral:

Stay the rent--stay home and sponge off the 'rents'
Go to school.
Get a girlfriend (or a boyfriend on the side if need be).
Read Odipus Rex (preferrably drunk)
Good luck.

mikeler
12-31-2008, 12:58 PM
Good post Fee. I like the tough love approach but then you come around there at the end :)

Fee
12-31-2008, 01:42 PM
Good post Fee. I like the tough love approach but then you come around there at the end :)


shhhh, don't want anyone to figure out that under my tough cynical nutty shell is a soft, caramel, sappy, emotional center. ;)

Happy New Year Mike. :)

mikeler
12-31-2008, 05:11 PM
Sorry for exposing you Fee, I meant go get him Tiger! :) Happy New Year to you too.

adams_1
12-31-2008, 05:37 PM
You honestly think this was harsh?

Try posting it on 4chan.

junbumkim
12-31-2008, 05:55 PM
Ballinbob-

I am just going to lay it out all for you..

Start using your brain, and get a grip of the real world. This is NOT the forum you want to be using for advice on personal matters...

What you are doing is nothing different from standing in the middle of a subway and asking a bunch of strangers for advice. The only different is that people on the subway will turn their head acting indifferent, these people love to post whatever they think.

If you really want sincere advice, go and talk to your favorite teacher, or one of your friends who listen VERY WELL.

junbumkim
12-31-2008, 05:56 PM
Also, I suggest you watch some of the Dr. House episodes and learn some tough reality..

Ballinbob
12-31-2008, 06:06 PM
Ballinbob-

I am just going to lay it out all for you..

Start using your brain, and get a grip of the real world. This is NOT the forum you want to be using for advice on personal matters...

What you are doing is nothing different from standing in the middle of a subway and asking a bunch of strangers for advice. The only different is that people on the subway will turn their head acting indifferent, these people love to post whatever they think.

If you really want sincere advice, go and talk to your favorite teacher, or one of your friends who listen VERY WELL.

Yeah, I learned this the hard way. That's why I said in my op that I'm sticking to the tennis/tips instruction part of the forums and i'm done with asking advice here. However, I wouldn't say that this forum is like the subway. There was a ton of bullsh1t in this thread, but those few helpful posts like ollinger's and mike's and fee's really helped me. And you too have helped me in the past as well. And I posted this here because I wanted the broadest range of opinions I could get. I've asked everyone I know about this and the responses have the same. I actually might keep posting these threads, because with every thread like this I post I get a reality check and ALWAYS learn something important. The past 3 threads of mine in this part of the forums seemed stupid to some, but I learned alot about myself with them. Strangers or not, there are people here who are willing to help me and give advice. I see your point though and I agree that its unusal to ask this stuff on a tennis forum.

RoddickAce
12-31-2008, 06:16 PM
Yeah, I learned this the hard way. That's why I said in my op that I'm sticking to the tennis/tips instruction part of the forums and i'm done with asking advice here. However, I wouldn't say that this forum is like the subway. There was a ton of bullsh1t in this thread, but those few helpful posts like ollinger's and mike's and fee's really helped me. And you too have helped me in the past as well. And I posted this here because I wanted the broadest range of opinions I could get. I've asked everyone I know about this and the responses have the same. I actually might keep posting these threads, because with every thread like this I post I get a reality check and ALWAYS learn something important. The past 3 threads of mine in this part of the forums seemed stupid to some, but I learned alot about myself with them. Strangers or not, there are people here who are willing to help me and give advice. I see your point though and I agree that its unusal to ask this stuff on a tennis forum.

Don't feel discouraged to post in other sections; everyone has their own circumstances and situations, so not many people know about how others are feeling like. In this topic however, I would recommend that you think about all the possible consequences, and why you might have thought about doing this. Also, put yourself in your parents' shoes and think about this and past situations in their perspectives as well. Then finally, talk to a counselor if you cannot resolve or think through this issue. Good luck, and I hope everything goes well.

mikeler
12-31-2008, 06:27 PM
Bob,

Junbumkim makes a valid point about finding a trusted person you can talk to. I'm not so sure about watching House :confused: though. We are a bunch of strangers, but you can get the vibe of most people just from a few posts.

Whether you talk to people or post things in this forum, it is still up to you to digest the information people present and decide what is best for you. It's very easy to be critical on these forums. It's much harder to provide constructive criticism.

If you want to share your own feelings on these boards, I don't see a problem with that. Enjoy these last few days of Xmas vacation and start hitting your backhand like my avatar. Happy New Year.

mikeler
12-31-2008, 06:29 PM
Also, put yourself in your parents' shoes and think about this and past situations in their perspectives as well.


This is great advice. Always try and imagine yourself as the other person and what they must be feeling.

S H O W S T O P P E R !
12-31-2008, 06:38 PM
Yes I joke about being emancipated all the time:confused::confused:

And I have a pretty good life, just a bad/nonexistent relationship with my parents. Usually all the threads I post in this section about my life end up with me looking like an idiot lol. I guess its for a good reason though. This thread was probably unnecessary and I could have come to the right conclusion if I thought about it a little more. Oh well, what's done is done.

Good, you learned the lesson. Your parents are providing a lot for you. Instead of taking their money and using it to leave them, try to mend the wounds. If your parents don't play tennis, teach them. I hated my older brother, but I taught him how to play and when we can find a court, we play every Wednesday. Find common ground with them and build up from there.

And trust me, there are kids at my school who tried emancipation and were DENIED. They lost all their college fund because the parents had control of it, and they had to build up that college fund. It's not easy getting scholarships when your resume says that you were denied emancipation from parents who did nothing illegal or wrong.

Ballinbob
12-31-2008, 06:41 PM
Bob,

Junbumkim makes a valid point about finding a trusted person you can talk to. I'm not so sure about watching House :confused: though. We are a bunch of strangers, but you can get the vibe of most people just from a few posts.

Whether you talk to people or post things in this forum, it is still up to you to digest the information people present and decide what is best for you. It's very easy to be critical on these forums. It's much harder to provide constructive criticism.

If you want to share your own feelings on these boards, I don't see a problem with that. Enjoy these last few days of Xmas vacation and start hitting your backhand like my avatar. Happy New Year.

I've never watched house so I have no idea there. I have 2 or so really trusted friends that I talk to, and they both said it was a stupid idea. In fact, they were pretty harsh on me just like everyone here. And I took your advice and just took the info I needed and left the rest behind. I deserved to be given this harsh treatment for even thinking of being emancipated. Once again, I learned alot from this thread. Whatever, I can't do everything perfect around here and I posted this b/c I thought it was a good idea. I just went with my gut feeling and posted the thread.

As for my backhand, I'm *SOOO* close to having my vid up. I've never really seen myself on vid and I look alot worse than what I thought lol. I also never really noticed how ripped my calves are haha:) I just restarted my comp and if the driver I downloaded was the right one then the rest will be easy.

edit-lol i closed the thread what, 10 hours ago and its still going...hah

mikeler
12-31-2008, 06:49 PM
Cool, glad you have some good friends that you can talk to. Back to tennis. I have a pretty decent 1 hander so I look forward to checking out your vid and giving my comments. My last comment on this thread...

adams_1
12-31-2008, 06:57 PM
Yeah, I learned this the hard way. That's why I said in my op that I'm sticking to the tennis/tips instruction part of the forums and i'm done with asking advice here. However, I wouldn't say that this forum is like the subway. There was a ton of bullsh1t in this thread, but those few helpful posts like ollinger's and mike's and fee's really helped me. And you too have helped me in the past as well. And I posted this here because I wanted the broadest range of opinions I could get. I've asked everyone I know about this and the responses have the same. I actually might keep posting these threads, because with every thread like this I post I get a reality check and ALWAYS learn something important. The past 3 threads of mine in this part of the forums seemed stupid to some, but I learned alot about myself with them. Strangers or not, there are people here who are willing to help me and give advice. I see your point though and I agree that its unusal to ask this stuff on a tennis forum.

Harden up mate. There was zero bull in this thread, just the truth. You asked for advice, and you got advice. Just because it wasn't what you wanted to hear you decide that we are the ones with the problem.

Nobody who posted wanted to hurt you, they were just trying to put some sense into your head.

Good luck working things out with your folks though dude. Oh, and i'm eagerly awaiting your videos :P

Tikiman53
12-31-2008, 10:45 PM
Hmmm... This reminds me of an episode of One Tree Hill where Nathan Scott emancipates from his parents and struggles to make his life right by making pretzels in a mall. Anyways, TV shows like that make it look all cool, but I'm pretty sure it sucks balls.

Hang in there, man. I get how you feel. I'm around your age, and sometimes, it sucks. I feel the same way as you. My Dad lives in another country. My sister's gone to college. And it's just me and my Mom. Sometimes, I feel like my life sucks and I have no one to talk to. I would come home from a crappy day at school, and I wouldn't have anyone to talk to or look at. I'd be alone, and I'd make my own food and do my work. My Mom would come home from a hard day of work. She'd have some dinner, drink a little, and often, she'd be ****ed off. My Mom and I fight a lot. And right now, my Dad and my sister are back in town for winter break. Even though it's the first time our family's been back together in a while, my Dad and my Mom still find some ways to fight each other (usually over stupid stuff. Their relationship is really kind of messed up). And even though I rarely see my sister, we'd find some ways to get into fights. Usually it would be because she believes she has somehow transformed into some all knowing guru after a semester of college and everything she says is patronizing, condescending, and just plain annoying.

I often think to myself, "I hate these guys and I can't wait to go to college." But really, family is extremely important. Even if your family has a ton of flaws, it's important to stick with them and learn from their mistakes so you can have a good family of your own someday. And even if there's something wrong with your parents, there are always people who care about you, like friends and whatnot, and maybe even some sympathetic posters here. Lol

Anyways, DON'T DO IT!!!! lol. You sound like a good guy. I like reading the stuff on these forums, and I always see arrogant and annoying posts written by some punk *** teenagers. You are probably one of the few guys my age who don't **** me off. There should be more guys like you at my school (school of spoiled, rich, cocky, and incredibly annoying preppies who think they are on the top of the world)

Oh yeah, House is very dangerous. I don't think you should watch it. THe first few seasons are really good, and you really start to bond with the characters. But the characters are soon replaced by some new guys that I hate, and now I realize that I have wasted so many hours watching it.

shell
01-01-2009, 07:51 PM
Bob, I just found this thread, but I would offer another bit of advice.

Just work on those ground strokes. And before you think I am being funny or sarcastic, think about what I am saying.

Find something to focus on, be it tennis, other sports, school work, a girlfriend...whatever. Get through these tough times. Tennis is what I used to get through my tough teenage years, and it is not a bad one at all.

Try to find a way to communicate, but don't ever feel there is nothing else out there - because you have tennis! If you are feeling angry and frustrated, hit the poop out of the ball. If you are confused and unfocused, try and construct the perfect point. If you are feeling lost and without a challange in life, then just go ahead and try that sharp angle cross court backhand winner.

My point is simply this....use the tools you have to manage a rough situation. This is a tough one. This will affect much of your life from this point on. Relationships are the hardest things you will face in your life. Don't take this one lightly, and don't give up on it lightly - but find an outlet for your frustrations, fear, anger and hurt.

Tennis is actually not a bad outlet, and it is a great life lesson.

Best of luck. You seem like a really nice, intelligent guy. You will get through this. But it will take a lot of work, and a lot of courage. Kind of like being a set down and match point against you. Are you ready to put in the effort and heart to pull this out? Or do you walk away with a loss and never know if you could have done it?