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Figjam
06-17-2009, 10:16 PM
Well, Ive made up my mind, I must find someone that plays, and preferably at a higher lever (4.0+)
All though it seems the Ratio of Guy to girls is about 10-1.
And you rarely see 2 girls hitting, or looking for a pick up game. Usually hitting with their boyfriends.

So, How does one go about finding Single female player? Im sure I'm not the only one wondering this??

And are women the same way? I mean if girl is single would she too be looking for a player/partner?? Or do women prefer not to play with guys for the most part??

They have these "social" mixers, but they arent really singles specific, and they really arent THAT social. I mean I might be playing on one court while someone i might like is on another court... so hows that help me??

Now I know being a tennis player isn't the only quality to consider, but it sure helps a lot!

Im wondering if most of the realatively younger girls that play are single? especially if they arent playing with their (obvious) BF?
Like when Im out playing and the ladies league shows up...:twisted:


the floor is open:

subaru3169
06-17-2009, 10:28 PM
i dated chiks i trained with and met at tourneys as a junior.. it can't be that hard, can it??

Figjam
06-17-2009, 10:39 PM
i dated chiks i trained with and met at tourneys as a junior.. it can't be that hard, can it??

Yes it can, as junior I'm sure its MUCH easier... Most girls dont continue sports after they get done with school

don_nguyen11490
06-17-2009, 11:10 PM
If you're looking for a girl that plays tennis then just go to places where girls play tennis like oh I dunno a college tennis club or anything like that?

subaru3169
06-18-2009, 02:39 AM
then join a tennis club play there.. you'll meet lots of folks

Atown
06-18-2009, 05:18 AM
then join a tennis club play there.. you'll meet lots of folks

Yes, however in my experience most of the women are older, attached, or both.

Have you considered finding the woman first and then, if she does not play tennis, introducing her to the game. That's what I did and it's working out well. My GF is excited to learn to play the sport and I'm enjoying teaching it to her. It's a good way to spend time together and to see the other person's true nature and character. But one has to remember to be patient, positive, and not too critical.

I was also frustrated with this issue and then I met the right woman and I am very glad that she was interested in learning tennis after seeing my enthusiasm for the sport.

Hang in there!

cak
06-18-2009, 06:14 AM
As for the women's teams, it depends on what you are referring to as "relatively younger girls". We do have single 19 and 20 year olds playing on our women's teams. But in general the ladies stop playing after high school, and then come back when their kids are in school, so after these girls who are the children of other members of the team, we pretty much jump to moms in their late 30/early 40s. And then the single ladies tend to be closer to 50. So I'm not sure the women's teams are your best bet for hunting.

Someone mentioned tennis clubs. I understand the women who do still play tennis after high school play at the big tennis clubs. I also know those places seem to be quite the pickup joint, with men outnumbering women 2-1, so competition is fierce, and the single women don't stay that way for long.

If you are amenable to online dating, I hear fitnesssingles is pretty good. I found my guy by mentioning tennis in my match.com profile. So you might try that.

blakesq
06-18-2009, 09:34 AM
when I was single i made a big mistake. I met a young woman at a tennis social, and we got together for drinks one night and had a nice time. Then we got together to play tennis. Well, I thought I needed to impress her with my tennis skills, so I proceeded to beat her 6-0. She wouldn't return my calls after that. So, the moral of the story, let her take a few games off of you.

tennisdad65
06-18-2009, 09:46 AM
I like my 'MY' time with the guys, away from my significant other. I love it that she does not play tennis. Or I would have to put up with some mixed doubles matches :twisted:

Swissv2
06-18-2009, 09:51 AM
Most unattached and very attractive female tennis players are relatively "new" to tennis.

If you find an unattached attractive female tennis player that is good, and you have the ability to flirt with her and ask her to teach you some tennis, then you are a lucky person.

Cruzer
06-18-2009, 09:57 AM
Well, Ive made up my mind, I must find someone that plays, and preferably at a higher lever (4.0+)
All though it seems the Ratio of Guy to girls is about 10-1.
And you rarely see 2 girls hitting, or looking for a pick up game. Usually hitting with their boyfriends.

So, How does one go about finding Single female player? Im sure I'm not the only one wondering this??

And are women the same way? I mean if girl is single would she too be looking for a player/partner?? Or do women prefer not to play with guys for the most part??

They have these "social" mixers, but they arent really singles specific, and they really arent THAT social. I mean I might be playing on one court while someone i might like is on another court... so hows that help me??

Now I know being a tennis player isn't the only quality to consider, but it sure helps a lot!

Im wondering if most of the realatively younger girls that play are single? especially if they arent playing with their (obvious) BF?
Like when Im out playing and the ladies league shows up...:twisted:

the floor is open:

Your post suggests that you are looking for a single woman <30 years old that plays tennis. Good luck! A couple of guys at my club have attractive relatively young girl friends that have just started playing tennis because their boy friends play. Having been to a lot of different tennis clubs and facilities playing USTA matches I can say I have seen 2 or 3 women that would fit what you are looking for and of course there is no shortage of single guys that want to hook up with them for tennis and whatever else develops.

MomentumGT
06-18-2009, 10:19 AM
You want a hottie that plays tennis, and plays it well, check out the local college teams, even the Junior college teams. Usually the best in the state, or the best on the teams aren't the best looking, but you might get lucky. The local Junior College womens team here has some good looking women on the team. Good Luck!

-Jon

CHOcobo
06-18-2009, 10:38 AM
when I was single i made a big mistake. I met a young woman at a tennis social, and we got together for drinks one night and had a nice time. Then we got together to play tennis. Well, I thought I needed to impress her with my tennis skills, so I proceeded to beat her 6-0. She wouldn't return my calls after that. So, the moral of the story, let her take a few games off of you.

LOL......that sucks man. i hope i don't come across this situation.

yea...it is hard finding a female that plays tennis.

Atown
06-18-2009, 11:05 AM
So, the moral of the story, let her take a few games off of you.

Very good advice!

PeppermintMocha
06-18-2009, 11:38 AM
Hmm.. I would suggest that, instead of trying to meet girls on tennis court, you should find a girl you like, and then introduce her to tennis.

Normally I'd be happy to hit with or play practice match with anyone at my local court, as my regular hitting partner lives quite far away. But now I'm very reluctantl to hit with male strangers because most of the time they tend get "chatty" and start getting personal and stuff... I mean I'm sure 90% of the time they're just being friendly, but I just like to play tennis and keep it about tennis you know what I mean? Knowing there are men out there who would only play with women because they want to make a move on them makes me a little depressed (although I'm not saying you are exactly like that kind of men). This also makes me reluctant to ask men I don't know well for a hit because I don't want them to get the wrong idea.

Topaz
06-18-2009, 11:39 AM
^^^Well said.

sureshs
06-18-2009, 11:55 AM
Most unattached and very attractive female tennis players are relatively "new" to tennis.

If you find an unattached attractive female tennis player that is good, and you have the ability to flirt with her and ask her to teach you some tennis, then you are a lucky person.

But most of them will discontinue tennis, and the older, attached, not-so-hot females are the ones left playing.

I think the younger females prefer to hit the gym and then have a social life with people who are potential partners, instead of spending hours on a boring game, enduring all the petty politics and jealousies of club and league women's matches.

Same thing applies to males, too. The hot guys are in the gym or playing pickup basketball.

sureshs
06-18-2009, 12:05 PM
but they arent really singles specific, and they really arent THAT social. I mean I might be playing on one court while someone i might like is on another court... so hows that help me??


In LA and SF there are special singles-only tennis events. But they are a negligible fraction of the huge singles-only events market.

One couple got married after meeting in the social mixer at our club. Their wedding reception was held next to the courts. Now, they run the social mixer. But neither of them can be called young.

The odd singles couple who does show up end up on opposite sides, or playing against much better or worse players, and they get frustrated. Sometimes I see a dating couple on the courts in our development with one teaching the other. If the girl is teaching the guy, it is a disaster, with the guy making excuses and smashing racquets, especially when people are looking. It is much better if the guy is teaching the girl, but he looks pathetic doing so. Best leave it to tennis pros to do the teaching.

Topaz
06-18-2009, 12:27 PM
Well, crap. I'm single, play tennis, and I'm not exactly over the hill! Guess I'm ugly!!!

Figjam
06-18-2009, 12:32 PM
Hmm.. I would suggest that, instead of trying to meet girls on tennis court, you should find a girl you like, and then introduce her to tennis.

Normally I'd be happy to hit with or play practice match with anyone at my local court, as my regular hitting partner lives quite far away. But now I'm very reluctantl to hit with male strangers because most of the time they tend get "chatty" and start getting personal and stuff... I mean I'm sure 90% of the time they're just being friendly, but I just like to play tennis and keep it about tennis you know what I mean? Knowing there are men out there who would only play with women because they want to make a move on them makes me a little depressed (although I'm not saying you are exactly like that kind of men). This also makes me reluctant to ask men I don't know well for a hit because I don't want them to get the wrong idea.

Well Hey all you gotta do is throw out the Hubby/BF doesnt play line, and trust me, they wont hear a word you say after that!

I dont like playing with parnoid people anyway!

Figjam
06-18-2009, 12:33 PM
Well, crap. I'm single, play tennis, and I'm not exactly over the hill! Guess I'm ugly!!!

No argument here! I havent even seen a picture, but you're one of "those" women... We guys arent that stupid, we know the type, to not even bother with!

LetFirstServe
06-18-2009, 12:34 PM
Hmm.. I would suggest that, instead of trying to meet girls on tennis court, you should find a girl you like, and then introduce her to tennis.

That's true. Contrary to the "tennis a game killer" thread in the rant section, for adults it only helps. Its a good daytime activity and you'll be surprised how many will pick up a raquet.

For my last one it wasn't an instant thing....she had to go to the store to buy another skirt first. :)

Its an easier way instead of looking for a 4.0+ on the court. Even then you need to set the court up like a chessboard to capitalize on an opportunity and you'd still need to beat around the bush too much.

Figjam
06-18-2009, 12:42 PM
Yeah its true, there are very few women between 20-35, that play sports in comparison.
as for the paranoid ladies, what do you expect??? Guys go after the girl, you dont like it? try changing socitey.... So you can STFU with "where are the good ones?" Cause the view aint so pretty from this side either!


I checked out the Fitness signels site, but theres not much there... Besides I've pretyt much given up on the Online crap:
A.... if youre so great, why are you still single and need to resort to online dating..
B.... Youre obviously not that Hot... Not responding to emails isnt helping yor cause..
C.... They guy youre looking for isnt on here... Cause hes outta your league..lower your standards one notch below super perfect/God

Figjam
06-18-2009, 12:50 PM
You want a hottie that plays tennis, and plays it well, check out the local college teams, even the Junior college teams. Usually the best in the state, or the best on the teams aren't the best looking, but you might get lucky. The local Junior College womens team here has some good looking women on the team. Good Luck!

-Jon


Well they are just a few years outta my range, unfortunately, but you are right! I took a "camp" (kinda sucked but thats another story)
at CU, with their Coach and team helping out and they pretty nice.. course the one I was interested in was going back to europe after graduatng a few weeks later...

Sigh...

sureshs
06-18-2009, 01:03 PM
No argument here! I havent even seen a picture, but you're one of "those" women... We guys arent that stupid, we know the type, to not even bother with!

You can see a picture if you want to. I forget the details, but look for a thread started by her about a female using the K88. I will leave it to your searching skills to proceed further.

Figjam
06-18-2009, 01:05 PM
You can see a picture if you want to. I forget the details, but look for a thread started by her about a female using the K88. I will leave it to your searching skills to proceed further.

Yeah... Um, I dont have that kind of time..

beernutz
06-18-2009, 01:15 PM
No argument here! I havent even seen a picture, but you're one of "those" women... We guys arent that stupid, we know the type, to not even bother with!

My professional opinion as a doctor of love is that it looks like you should consider a personality transplant before starting your date search.

sureshs
06-18-2009, 01:17 PM
Yeah... Um, I dont have that kind of time..

Neither do I

Swissv2
06-18-2009, 01:23 PM
I could just imagine your "craigslist" posting:


Lonely white male. Likes long walks to the tennis courts.
Looking for attractive, no ~ make that "hot", female tennis player with at least an NTRP rating of 4.0+.
Must have knowledge of the tennis greats, but not make me look too stupid, cause that would suck.
Must be ready to play mixed doubles with me, and not grunt too loudly.
Having a good sense of tennis fashion a plus.
Looking great in a skirt a big plus.
Sexy accent a big plus.
Be able to play tennis with me at the drop of a dime.


Won't you be my special tennis ball machine? :mrgreen:

PeppermintMocha
06-18-2009, 01:35 PM
Well Hey all you gotta do is throw out the Hubby/BF doesnt play line, and trust me, they wont hear a word you say after that!

I dont like playing with parnoid people anyway!

Geez I was just offering a female point of view. No need to be petty.

Figjam
06-18-2009, 01:49 PM
I could just imagine your "craigslist" posting:


Actually I kinda like the grunting, just not the shrieking! its sorta hot

onehandbh
06-18-2009, 01:57 PM
I used to play at these public courts that had a bunch of
regulars that played there. One of the guys, this short
mid 60's guy who was about a 3.0 - 3.5 would always
scare away every cute girl (that didn't come w/a BF)
that came to play there. He'd immediately go to her,
and try to give her lessons and hit on her. It would always
end badly and the girl would get creeped out and
never come to the courts again.

Figjam
06-18-2009, 02:03 PM
I used to play at these public courts that had a bunch of
regulars that played there. One of the guys, this short
mid 60's guy who was about a 3.0 - 3.5 would always
scare away every cute girl (that didn't come w/a BF)
that came to play there. He'd immediately go to her,
and try to give her lessons and hit on her. In would always
end badly and the girl would never come to the courts
again.

Oh we have that here! This guy must be a brotha from another mother, except he tries to sell lessons to them, but he sorta gets away with it because its pretty obvious the he has ZERO chance with them.

Figjam
06-18-2009, 02:04 PM
Just posted this for the hell of it :twisted:

white male.
Likes long walks to the tennis courts.
Looking for attractive, no ~ make that "hot", female tennis player with at least an NTRP rating of 4.0+.
Must have knowledge of the tennis greats,
Must be ready to play mixed doubles with me, Grunting is fine, actually kinda hot, just no shrieking!
Having a good sense of tennis fashion a plus.
Looking great in a skirt a big plus.
must not be a naggy double partner

Be able to play tennis with me at the drop of a dime..... I got lots of dimes!

Promise to let you win :-P


Won't you be my hitting partner and more!

Redflea
06-18-2009, 02:45 PM
I totally understand how the OP feels, and I'm surprised I haven't seen more posts like this.

My wife plays tennis (about 3.5 or so) and it was one of my hopes (aside from us loving each other and silly things like that) when looking for a wife. (The other bonus was scuba diving, and she got certified just a couple weeks before the wedding! She's a keeper.)

In my case it was dumb luck - we met in our mid-20's, started dating, and then I found out she played tennis. At the time I hadn't been playing due to a nagging injury, but the fact that she was so cute and wanted to hit eventually got me doing some rehab to get back on the court, and was partly responsible for my eventual return to playing regularly.

It's important to share interests - We go on tennis vacations, go to professional tournaments, play doubles and singles w/our kids (both of whom are on their HS tennis team) and friends, and when the majors are on TV she understands when I want to watch many hours of tennis, and joins me for a lot of it. She understood why I bought a stringing machine, doesn't bother me with "Why?!" questions when I buy multiple copies of different racquets, etc. Yup - she's an enabler, lucky me. :D

So don't give up - go to local tournaments and strike up a few conversations with women...if they aren't interested, ask them if they have friends. (Two of my buddies met their wives by asking women who weren't interested in them if they had any friends to set them up with.) Check out any local college teams, mention to friends/co-workers that you're interested in meeting single women who play, etc.

Good luck!

Cindysphinx
06-18-2009, 03:12 PM
No argument here! I havent even seen a picture, but you're one of "those" women... We guys arent that stupid, we know the type, to not even bother with!

Methinks I see the reason OP might be struggling . . . . No need to say it out loud or anything, I guess.

beernutz
06-18-2009, 03:15 PM
I totally understand how the OP feels, and I'm surprised I haven't seen more posts like this.

My wife plays tennis (about 3.5 or so) and it was one of my hopes (aside from us loving each other and silly things like that) when looking for a wife. (The other bonus was scuba diving, and she got certified just a couple weeks before the wedding! She's a keeper.)

In my case it was dumb luck - we met in our mid-20's, started dating, and then I found out she played tennis. At the time I hadn't been playing due to a nagging injury, but the fact that she was so cute and wanted to hit eventually got me doing some rehab to get back on the court, and was partly responsible for my eventual return to playing regularly.

It's important to share interests - We go on tennis vacations, go to professional tournaments, play doubles and singles w/our kids (both of whom are on their HS tennis team) and friends, and when the majors are on TV she understands when I want to watch many hours of tennis, and joins me for a lot of it. She understood why I bought a stringing machine, doesn't bother me with "Why?!" questions when I buy multiple copies of different racquets, etc. Yup - she's an enabler, lucky me. :D

So don't give up - go to local tournaments and strike up a few conversations with women...if they aren't interested, ask them if they have friends. (Two of my buddies met their wives by asking women who weren't interested in them if they had any friends to set them up with.) Check out any local college teams, mention to friends/co-workers that you're interested in meeting single women who play, etc.

Good luck!

I agree, having a tennis-playing spouse is pretty A+. For our 20th anniversary last year we went to Saddlebrook tennis resort outside Tampa and it was her idea!

Topaz
06-18-2009, 04:02 PM
No argument here! I havent even seen a picture, but you're one of "those" women... We guys arent that stupid, we know the type, to not even bother with!

Methinks I see the reason OP might be struggling . . . . No need to say it out loud or anything, I guess.

Ding, ding, ding...we have a winner!!!

Really, with what a winning personality, I'm amazed that he can't find someone!

And, if by 'one of 'those' women' he means 'unwilling to put up with a bunch of crap by an insecure and immature jerk' then yes...I am one of those women.

Figjam
06-18-2009, 04:03 PM
Methinks I see the reason OP might be struggling . . . . No need to say it out loud or anything, I guess.


Nah, its your type I try to avoid, which is unfortunatley the type that typically shows up to the courts:(

Not looking for a housewife, which you obviously are..

Figjam
06-18-2009, 04:08 PM
Ding, ding, ding...we have a winner!!!

Really, with what a winning personality, I'm amazed that he can't find someone!

And, if by 'one of 'those' women' he means 'unwilling to put up with a bunch of crap by an insecure and immature jerk' then yes...I am one of those women.

LOL.... yeah, then why are you posting??? Let me guess both you and Cindy, middle aged housewives who have nothing better to do than gossip! OMG, you were probaly the same in HS... no wonder with the amount of posts Cindy posts... To reiterate... You talk to much.

How about a new show... "the housewifes of Talk tennis"

Lets see two old hens... talking about how they are scared of playing with guys.... Yeah... that just the type im looking for..

Figjam
06-18-2009, 04:12 PM
I totally understand how the OP feels, and I'm surprised I haven't seen more posts like this.

My wife plays tennis (about 3.5 or so) and it was one of my hopes (aside from us loving each other and silly things like that) when looking for a wife. (The other bonus was scuba diving, and she got certified just a couple weeks before the wedding! She's a keeper.)

In my case it was dumb luck - we met in our mid-20's, started dating, and then I found out she played tennis. At the time I hadn't been playing due to a nagging injury, but the fact that she was so cute and wanted to hit eventually got me doing some rehab to get back on the court, and was partly responsible for my eventual return to playing regularly.

It's important to share interests - We go on tennis vacations, go to professional tournaments, play doubles and singles w/our kids (both of whom are on their HS tennis team) and friends, and when the majors are on TV she understands when I want to watch many hours of tennis, and joins me for a lot of it. She understood why I bought a stringing machine, doesn't bother me with "Why?!" questions when I buy multiple copies of different racquets, etc. Yup - she's an enabler, lucky me. :D

So don't give up - go to local tournaments and strike up a few conversations with women...if they aren't interested, ask them if they have friends. (Two of my buddies met their wives by asking women who weren't interested in them if they had any friends to set them up with.) Check out any local college teams, mention to friends/co-workers that you're interested in meeting single women who play, etc.

Good luck!


Yeah, some of them might turn out to be like Cindy and Topaz LOL!!!

But I might check out on about getting in some Mixed doubles leagues... I think the "connection" route, might be a way to go

Tenski
06-18-2009, 04:20 PM
Well, crap. I'm single, play tennis, and I'm not exactly over the hill! Guess I'm ugly!!!

Topaz--I've seen you play more than once and you're definitely neither over-the-hill nor ugly and being a good tennis player is definitely an asset. There are lots of guys in the 30-35 age range that play USTA league tennis and would love to have an introduction to you, either on the courts or elsewhere.

Tenski

Topaz
06-18-2009, 04:21 PM
LOL.... yeah, then why are you posting??? Let me guess both you and Cindy, middle aged housewives who have nothing better to do than gossip! OMG, you were probaly the same in HS... no wonder with the amount of posts Cindy posts... To reiterate... You talk to much.

How about a new show... "the housewifes of Talk tennis"

Lets see two old hens... talking about how they are scared of playing with guys.... Yeah... that just the type im looking for..

I am neither middle aged, nor a housewife.

I regularly play with the guys of the Tennis Warehouse Mid-Atlantic Chapter. I've hit with the guys from South Florida. So, not afraid there, either.

I also have participated in a National Tournament, in mixed, and faced the serve of 5.0 nationally ranked men. So, guess you're wrong there, too.

Any other rude insults you'd like to throw out there? Would you like to explain why exactly why you are being such a jerk? Every female who has actually responded to this thread, either to comment or have a bit of fun, you've been incredibly rude to. Again, if this is how you are in real life, then that is exactly why you aren't finding anyone.

Topaz
06-18-2009, 04:22 PM
Topaz--I've seen you play more than once and you're definitely neither over-the-hill nor ugly and being a good tennis player is definitely an asset. There are lots of guys in the 30-35 age range that play USTA league tennis and would love to have an introduction to you, either on the courts or elsewhere.

Tenski

Tenski, thank you, I appreciate that! I was just having a bit of fun when I posted that, and didn't really expect such an ugly response.

I do hope, that if our paths cross again in real life, you will let me know!!! I promise not to 'out' you!!! :)

Figjam
06-18-2009, 04:32 PM
I am neither middle aged, nor a housewife.

I regularly play with the guys of the Tennis Warehouse Mid-Atlantic Chapter. I've hit with the guys from South Florida. So, not afraid there, either.

I also have participated in a National Tournament, in mixed, and faced the serve of 5.0 nationally ranked men. So, guess you're wrong there, too.

Any other rude insults you'd like to throw out there? Would you like to explain why exactly why you are being such a jerk? Every female who has actually responded to this thread, either to comment or have a bit of fun, you've been incredibly rude to. Again, if this is how you are in real life, then that is exactly why you aren't finding anyone.

Um how about youve contributed nothing other than being *****y?? and "scared"??
If its one thing I hate, its scared women... which unfortunately most women are... what you think everyguy is going to go after you??


I react to the attitude of those around me. If I met someone such as your self, trust me I would have no interest, and Really you woudlnt know the difference/me as I wouldnt not waste much time in talking to you...


Every female?? what you and cindy? 2 of a kind?? not much of an argument.
DO you actually read anything or just scan through it in a rabid attempt to post your opinions???

Yeah Im the jerk, Cause you dont like what you hear..., and something tells me, that you only hear what you want to...



Now would you like to continue with your ****ed off rebuttal?.....


tell you what.. stop posting in this thread, hows that?? save us both the trouble... why dont you just call up cindy and gossip about me, in private?

Topaz
06-18-2009, 04:33 PM
Um, no, I'm not ****ed off. Again, also not scared. I think you need some help though.

MomentumGT
06-18-2009, 05:11 PM
LOL.... yeah, then why are you posting??? Let me guess both you and Cindy, middle aged housewives who have nothing better to do than gossip! OMG, you were probaly the same in HS... no wonder with the amount of posts Cindy posts... To reiterate... You talk to much.

How about a new show... "the housewifes of Talk tennis"

Lets see two old hens... talking about how they are scared of playing with guys.... Yeah... that just the type im looking for..

These "women" here may not be your type, but that doesn't mean they don't have any female friends that can possibly be your type. Sheesh! You are shooting yourself in the foot with one set of ladies before you even begin. Use them to fine tune your "dating" game if you will, doesn't mean you have to settle. Funny post tho.

-Jon

dennis10is
06-18-2009, 05:16 PM
Um how about youve contributed nothing other than being *****y?? and "scared"??
If its one thing I hate, its scared women... which unfortunately most women are... what you think everyguy is going to go after you??


I react to the attitude of those around me. If I met someone such as your self, trust me I would have no interest, and Really you woudlnt know the difference/me as I wouldnt not waste much time in talking to you...


Every female?? what you and cindy? 2 of a kind?? not much of an argument.
DO you actually read anything or just scan through it in a rabid attempt to post your opinions???

Yeah Im the jerk, Cause you dont like what you hear..., and something tells me, that you only hear what you want to...



Now would you like to continue with your ****ed off rebuttal?.....


tell you what.. stop posting in this thread, hows that?? save us both the trouble... why dont you just call up cindy and gossip about me, in private?

Dude,

Reality check. You are having difficult time finding these women, hence the reason for your post.

I hate to break the news to you but if you were the great catch, the women, the admittedly few who play tennis at the 4.0+ level would seek you out if they happen to come across you at the club or at any tennis activities. Trust me. Women are always searching for good mates, they do not do it so obviously most of the time, but they are looking just as studiously as men.

How many hot women tennis players have become your steady hitting partner/friend, hookup hottie/gf in high schook, college, etc...?

Past success is a good predictor of future performance.

Added: The question that most of us would like to know is:

Let's say that we find a good looking twenty something, single female, well adjusted, successful, educated, 4.0 - 5.0 tennis player who played in high school and college tennis. Do you think that if we were to know you, we would say, these two would make a good couple and because we like you and want the best for you, we old folks (that's me) would try to help the two of you get together?

TJK
06-18-2009, 05:21 PM
Sigh... this is exactly the reason why girls are wary about these kinds of things.

I'm a guy, and you (OP) make a bad name for the rest of us normal guys who aren't psycho but would still like to meet women around the same age (mid 20s early 30s in my case) who can share similar interests (tennis, rockclimbing, windsurfing).

So, any single girls around SF Bay Area around 3.5-4.0 who want to play some tennis? Don't worry, I'm in a USTA League and have other 'unavailable' females who can vouch for me :)

wally
06-18-2009, 05:54 PM
see below one should not imbibe while posting

wally
06-18-2009, 05:55 PM
I hadn't planned to wade into this one but IMHO you've stepped way over the line. I think Topaz, Cindy & PML are well justified in their "fear" of being hit on. As men we often have a hard time seeing the fair sex as a fun capable person to play tennis backgammon chess or much else. The male ego + testosterone can be a very fragile ugly beast, and right now sir your's is full bloom:shock:.
When you learn to "check the ego at the door" and to just go out play tennis and have fun you'll find women actually talking with you. If you are as good a player as you seem to think you are they might (after a while) even ask you to hit.
so far all your post has done is provide a wondreful example to all the other single guys in TW land of what NOT to do if you're trying to date!
One of the many things we learn from tennis is problem solving skills. You've presented a problem and right now you're game isn't working.... I'd say its time for a lesson or two or maybe you need to learn to listen

BTW Often the attutude of those around is a direct reflection of the attitude we are projecting .....

Um how about youve contributed nothing other than being *****y?? and "scared"??
If its one thing I hate, its scared women... which unfortunately most women are... what you think everyguy is going to go after you??


I react to the attitude of those around me. If I met someone such as your self, trust me I would have no interest, and Really you woudlnt know the difference/me as I wouldnt not waste much time in talking to you...


Every female?? what you and cindy? 2 of a kind?? not much of an argument.
DO you actually read anything or just scan through it in a rabid attempt to post your opinions???

Yeah Im the jerk, Cause you dont like what you hear..., and something tells me, that you only hear what you want to...



Now would you like to continue with your ****ed off rebuttal?.....


tell you what.. stop posting in this thread, hows that?? save us both the trouble... why dont you just call up cindy and gossip about me, in private?

Nellie
06-18-2009, 06:06 PM
I have done the league tennis dating thing - pretty fun for a while, but it really sucks when you break up because then you either have awkward league matches or you stop playing.

nhat8121
06-18-2009, 06:09 PM
wow dude (op), you need a chill pill...so rude :(

LetFirstServe
06-18-2009, 06:29 PM
Last year me and my hitting partner were on a public court one Sunday night. One girl in her early 20s walked by through the park path and seen us having a lot of fun then came back around again and started talking to us. She said her and her friend want to play but there is no one around to play with and if we'd be back next Sunday. We were like "yeah sure we always play here". Who knows how it would have went if we actually went back the next week...we forgot all about it....lol I kinda feel bad about it talking about it now those girls just wanted to play and if they came the next week we kinda stood them up. Therefore wally is right...just go out and have fun and try not to go around the court looking like a PSO (possible sex offender).

Cindysphinx
06-18-2009, 07:50 PM
Nah, its your type I try to avoid, which is unfortunatley the type that typically shows up to the courts:(

Not looking for a housewife, which you obviously are..

Oooh, he called me "housewife." Yep, that will really take me down a peg or two. It's almost quaint, in a way! :)

Perhaps you should consider following the Elliot Spitzer method of meeting women. I'm thinking it might be your only hope. :)

Cindy -- who will probably have to explain to Figjam who Elliot Spitzer is

Swissv2
06-18-2009, 08:24 PM
Oh my how this thread flung way out of control.

I am sure Cindysphinx is a cougar ;)
I am sure Topaz is a lovely lass that can bring a mean game :D

No more insults now. Please.

Remember, both Cindy and Topaz are just giving some helpful tips. After all, they know about what attracts a woman more than anyone.

This thread should be all in good humor. :mrgreen:

maverick66
06-18-2009, 08:34 PM
with a personallity like this may i recommend you invest in duct tape and a sound proof basement. only way i can think of to get a woman to stay with you.:)

Storm
06-18-2009, 09:25 PM
Here are some very helpful links for all of us to read ( it's not nice to single out people **cough cough** OP mainly, so play nice)

http://www.wikihow.com/Be-Nice-to-People

http://www.anger-management-techniques.org/

http://www.athealth.com/Consumer/issues/childsanger.html

http://www.wesleyjsmith.com/blog/uploaded_images/be_nice_or_leave-734194.jpg

subaru3169
06-18-2009, 09:32 PM
whoa.. what happened here

from experience, being more open minded and tolerant of different types of ppl can net you a larger friendly network.. bashing cindy and topaz wasn't necessary as they are very nice women on this board

even if you wouldn't want to play with women like them, it doesn't hurt to be friendly

jwr1972
06-19-2009, 04:43 AM
OP,

Even Wayne Newton says love comes when you least expect it in Vegas. Seriously, cart before the horse is running rampant in your mind. You should try to hook up on a personal/intellectual level and then see what happens. A little humility goes a long way.

spiderman123
06-19-2009, 05:03 AM
I scanned through this thread and want to say just one thing.

Please don't use the word "housewife" as if it is a bad thing. (No, my wife is not a housewife.)

I think being a housewife, especially if you are a mother, and taking care of kids every week day is an incredibly difficult and tiring job and gets little or no recognition, especially since it is so good for the kids development in the early years. A bachelor with no kids can never understand this and how frustrating it can be at times and this is one insulting statement I cannot ignore.

Hats off to all housewives over there.
[And don't get me started on single working mothers (no octamom references please), If there are superhumans in this world, it is them.]

Cindysphinx
06-19-2009, 05:25 AM
I scanned through this thread and want to say just one thing.

Please don't use the word "housewife" as if it is a bad thing. (No, my wife is not a housewife.)

I think being a housewife, especially if you are a mother, and taking care of kids every week day is an incredibly difficult and tiring job and gets little or no recognition, especially since it is so good for the kids development in the early years. A bachelor with no kids can never understand this and how frustrating it can be at times and this is one insulting statement I cannot ignore.

Hats off to all housewives over there.
[And don't get me started on single working mothers (no octamom references please), If there are superhumans in this world, it is them.]


Thanks for that, Spiderman. As the parent of teens and pre-teens, I will augment your statement to say that having someone at home is also extremely important as the kids get older and need a firm and caring hand and relentless supervision.

I think our society has made terrific progress in how stay-at-home parents are viewed since the early days of feminism. When I came of age in the late 1970s and late 1980s, women were finally being permitted to pursue whatever careers they choose. My role models were women who had succeeded in careers, and I had little respect for "housewives." To my way of thinking at the time, women only stayed at home if they were too dim to work or couldn't earn enough to make it worthwhile. These women were not independent and relied on a man for the clothes on their backs, living an existences in which they were one affair away from poverty should their husbands kick them to the curb. I decided that no way no how was I ever going to be in that position.

Fortunately, most people these days realize how silly, insulting and inaccurate these beliefs really are. Parents choose to work for all sorts of reasons, and parents choose to stay home for all sorts of reasons. It is not an easy choice to make, and it is very difficult to get a do-over if you decide you chose the wrong path. These are things I figured out as I matured and learned more about the world, helped along by society's recognition that the most important thing was to make sure everyone has a choice and that everyone's choice is respected.

The OP is probably where I was (in terms of age and life experience) when I held those ignorant beliefs. I suspect he'll evolve someday, probably right around the time he has a spouse and family and develops a better understanding of why couples might decide that they are better off having one person stay home.

As for me, I'm happy with my choice and wouldn't change a thing.

Cindy -- whose kids start to freak out if she raises the subject of jumping back into the workforce

The_Question
06-19-2009, 05:35 AM
No argument here! I havent even seen a picture, but you're one of "those" women... We guys arent that stupid, we know the type, to not even bother with!

Met her in person at the April meet. She's cute and very friendly, so yeah dude, you're talking out of your butt...and using that to get a picture out uh? LOL!

ezylman
06-22-2009, 07:55 AM
Sometimes you can just be fortunate...

I started dating somebody recently and as the conversation continued, I found out she was the state champ in tennis. Score for me.

On another note, I have met many women over my 33 years who looked like models, but were horrible people. Yeah, they might be fun to look at, but eventually you have to talk to them. A woman's personality is what you really need to look for if you want a relationship that is worth anything.

Power Player
06-23-2009, 10:55 AM
Figjam, you are in the trap of being frustrated by apparently having no luck with girls. And the only way to really get a girl is to have a good attitude about things in my experience.

I actually got back into tennis because I was dating this girl who wanted to play. She is still a friend. A gorgeous puetro rican girl. We would work out and play tennis, it was pretty great. Her family was not about her dating a "gringo" so it did not work out..oh well. But she was not that good at tennis :( I know one thing..you can meet a girl out and tell her you love to play and 9/10 if she is interested, she will ask you to play some time. I have taken many dates to hit the ball.

Obviously I would prefer to date a girl who can play at a 3-3.5 level at least. That would be amazing. I am in FL, and a lot of women still play tennis. They are older, and many have unreal bodies because of that. So yes, based on my experience seeing hot moms playing tennis since I started as a 7 year old, I would prefer a wife that likes to play! It just takes patience, and a good attitude. The OP got negative real fast over things that did not require that type of reaction.

Grover Sparkman
06-23-2009, 12:04 PM
Um how about youve contributed nothing other than being *****y?? and "scared"??
If its one thing I hate, its scared women... which unfortunately most women are...

Women love the misogyny!

Dude, you are on an internet message board asking how to meet women...you probably shouldn't stand right next to the walls of your glass house.

sureshs
06-23-2009, 12:16 PM
I scanned through this thread and want to say just one thing.

Please don't use the word "housewife" as if it is a bad thing. (No, my wife is not a housewife.)

I think being a housewife, especially if you are a mother, and taking care of kids every week day is an incredibly difficult and tiring job and gets little or no recognition, especially since it is so good for the kids development in the early years. A bachelor with no kids can never understand this and how frustrating it can be at times and this is one insulting statement I cannot ignore.

Hats off to all housewives over there.
[And don't get me started on single working mothers (no octamom references please), If there are superhumans in this world, it is them.]

The modern term is homemaker

sureshs
06-23-2009, 12:18 PM
Thanks for that, Spiderman. As the parent of teens and pre-teens, I will augment your statement to say that having someone at home is also extremely important as the kids get older and need a firm and caring hand and relentless supervision.

I think our society has made terrific progress in how stay-at-home parents are viewed since the early days of feminism. When I came of age in the late 1970s and late 1980s, women were finally being permitted to pursue whatever careers they choose. My role models were women who had succeeded in careers, and I had little respect for "housewives." To my way of thinking at the time, women only stayed at home if they were too dim to work or couldn't earn enough to make it worthwhile. These women were not independent and relied on a man for the clothes on their backs, living an existences in which they were one affair away from poverty should their husbands kick them to the curb. I decided that no way no how was I ever going to be in that position.

Fortunately, most people these days realize how silly, insulting and inaccurate these beliefs really are. Parents choose to work for all sorts of reasons, and parents choose to stay home for all sorts of reasons. It is not an easy choice to make, and it is very difficult to get a do-over if you decide you chose the wrong path. These are things I figured out as I matured and learned more about the world, helped along by society's recognition that the most important thing was to make sure everyone has a choice and that everyone's choice is respected.

The OP is probably where I was (in terms of age and life experience) when I held those ignorant beliefs. I suspect he'll evolve someday, probably right around the time he has a spouse and family and develops a better understanding of why couples might decide that they are better off having one person stay home.

As for me, I'm happy with my choice and wouldn't change a thing.

Cindy -- whose kids start to freak out if she raises the subject of jumping back into the workforce

So you can think and post seriously too?

MegacedU
06-23-2009, 12:23 PM
Before I met my boyfriend, I used to try to date a lot of tennis guys. But then I realized that the people that were on the same level skill wise as me, loved the game more than they could ever love me. Haha...

But seriously, when I was on the prowl, I'd purposely go to busy public courts with a tennis playing girl friend and suggest mixed doubles with a male pair. Go do that. Except in reverse.

topher.juan
06-24-2009, 04:20 AM
I met some girl playing (tennis) with her boyfriend today. She looked just like Sam Stosur, so of course I'm not not going to say anything. Today I realized the beautiful thing about meeting girls on the tennis court is that the court naturally separates the girl from the guy. This is genius. I'm so tired of hitting on taken women where their guy is right there, the tennis court is where it's at. The given battlegrounds placed him at an immediate disadvantage, he was rendered completely defenseless and the threat of him interjecting was completely neutralized. Poor guy stood there helpless, c-blocked by the net and 78' of court. How did I not realize this earlier? All along I have been looking for taken women in all the wrong places! I digress. On my last practice serve I hit it way out wide on the ad court, really trying to get that thing in her court, no pun intended. I ran to get the ball and talked to her, did the "Oh, just looking for players.." thing, ran a few canned lines quiet enough so the guy could only hear her laughing. She suggested we play and we exchanged digits at her request. If you want to know, my real secret today was this: I was dressed like 'nando in AO09, holding my lovely tfight320 with shiny new luxilon -- so suave, yet so irresistible. I even did the hotsauce posture and smile. Ladies, I know you know what I'm talking about. She introduced me to the guy beyond the baseline, I smiled, waved and winked. No response. Now, I know some of you will think I am a dirty man with no morals for hitting on a possibly spoken for woman. You couldn't be more wrong. Who am I to assume their relationship is anything remotely happy and/or stable? I have only just met her and am not about to ask if she is pleased with him, that would be prying! Am I to take for granted that a woman is satisfied with the man she is currently with? Of course not! That would be downright judgmental and judgmental is certainly something Topher-Juan is not. I am a better man than that. Once again, I was simply being a good samaritan and presenting her with options, it would have been nothing but rude to have not done so. We're playing this weekend while he's working out of town. Life is good.

:twisted:

LetFirstServe
06-24-2009, 05:30 AM
I met some girl playing (tennis) with her boyfriend today. She looked just like Sam Stosur, so of course I'm not not going to say anything. Today I realized the beautiful thing about meeting girls on the tennis court is that the court naturally separates the girl from the guy. This is genius. I'm so tired of hitting on taken women where their guy is right there, the tennis court is where it's at. The given battlegrounds placed him at an immediate disadvantage, he was rendered completely defenseless and the threat of him interjecting was completely neutralized. Poor guy stood there helpless, c-blocked by the net and 78' of court. How did I not realize this earlier? All along I have been looking for taken women in all the wrong places! I digress. On my last practice serve I hit it way out wide on the ad court, really trying to get that thing in her court, no pun intended. I ran to get the ball and talked to her, did the "Oh, just looking for players.." thing, ran a few canned lines quiet enough so the guy could only hear her laughing. She suggested we play and we exchanged digits at her request. If you want to know, my real secret today was this: I was dressed like 'nando in AO09, holding my lovely tfight320 with shiny new luxilon -- so suave, yet so irresistible. I even did the hotsauce posture and smile. Ladies, I know you know what I'm talking about. She introduced me to the guy beyond the baseline, I smiled, waved and winked. No response. Now, I know some of you will think I am a dirty man with no morals for hitting on a possibly spoken for woman. You couldn't be more wrong. Who am I to assume their relationship is anything remotely happy and/or stable? I have only just met her and am not about to ask if she is pleased with him, that would be prying! Am I to take for granted that a woman is satisfied with the man she is currently with? Of course not! That would be downright judgmental and judgmental is certainly something Topher-Juan is not. I am a better man than that. Once again, I was simply being a good samaritan and presenting her with options, it would have been nothing but rude to have not done so. We're playing this weekend while he's working out of town. Life is good.

:twisted:


http://images-cdn01.associatedcontent.com/image/A1512/151253/300_151253.jpg






???

Raindown
06-24-2009, 11:34 AM
But seriously, when I was on the prowl, I'd purposely go to busy public courts with a tennis playing girl friend and suggest mixed doubles with a male pair. Go do that. Except in reverse.

Clever. However, I think two gentlemen would be more receptive to the ladies than the other way around, especially on a random public court. I could be wrong though.

beernutz
06-24-2009, 12:12 PM
I met some girl playing (tennis) with her boyfriend today. She looked just like Sam Stosur, so of course I'm not not going to say anything. Today I realized the beautiful thing about meeting girls on the tennis court is that the court naturally separates the girl from the guy. This is genius. I'm so tired of hitting on taken women where their guy is right there, the tennis court is where it's at. The given battlegrounds placed him at an immediate disadvantage, he was rendered completely defenseless and the threat of him interjecting was completely neutralized. Poor guy stood there helpless, c-blocked by the net and 78' of court. How did I not realize this earlier? All along I have been looking for taken women in all the wrong places! I digress. On my last practice serve I hit it way out wide on the ad court, really trying to get that thing in her court, no pun intended. I ran to get the ball and talked to her, did the "Oh, just looking for players.." thing, ran a few canned lines quiet enough so the guy could only hear her laughing. She suggested we play and we exchanged digits at her request. If you want to know, my real secret today was this: I was dressed like 'nando in AO09, holding my lovely tfight320 with shiny new luxilon -- so suave, yet so irresistible. I even did the hotsauce posture and smile. Ladies, I know you know what I'm talking about. She introduced me to the guy beyond the baseline, I smiled, waved and winked. No response. Now, I know some of you will think I am a dirty man with no morals for hitting on a possibly spoken for woman. You couldn't be more wrong. Who am I to assume their relationship is anything remotely happy and/or stable? I have only just met her and am not about to ask if she is pleased with him, that would be prying! Am I to take for granted that a woman is satisfied with the man she is currently with? Of course not! That would be downright judgmental and judgmental is certainly something Topher-Juan is not. I am a better man than that. Once again, I was simply being a good samaritan and presenting her with options, it would have been nothing but rude to have not done so. We're playing this weekend while he's working out of town. Life is good.

:twisted:

http://rumplo.com/assets/contrib/tees/0001/1510/11510-1.jpg

Cindysphinx
06-24-2009, 12:32 PM
It's always interesting to hear guys talk about this stuff.

I dunno, maybe I'm just really conservative or something. But if a strange guy approached me and showed interest, this was . . . . well, I don't know anything about him. He is only interested based on appearance, not personality. I just never saw much upside in it for me, you know? It felt like buying a lottery ticket -- yeah, maybe he would turn out to be worth a darn, but the chances were awfully low. I mean, if he is such a catch, why is he trolling for women in a public park?

I always thought the best way to meet someone was to just be an interesting person with interests, not approach random women largely based on how they look.

But hey, maybe the dating scene has changed. I've been out of it for about 25 years . . . .

sureshs
06-24-2009, 01:12 PM
It's always interesting to hear guys talk about this stuff.

I dunno, maybe I'm just really conservative or something. But if a strange guy approached me and showed interest, this was . . . . well, I don't know anything about him. He is only interested based on appearance, not personality. I just never saw much upside in it for me, you know? It felt like buying a lottery ticket -- yeah, maybe he would turn out to be worth a darn, but the chances were awfully low. I mean, if he is such a catch, why is he trolling for women in a public park?

I always thought the best way to meet someone was to just be an interesting person with interests, not approach random women largely based on how they look.

But hey, maybe the dating scene has changed. I've been out of it for about 25 years . . . .

It is all on the internet now

Razda
06-24-2009, 05:04 PM
It's always interesting to hear guys talk about this stuff.

I dunno, maybe I'm just really conservative or something. But if a strange guy approached me and showed interest, this was . . . . well, I don't know anything about him. He is only interested based on appearance, not personality. I just never saw much upside in it for me, you know? It felt like buying a lottery ticket -- yeah, maybe he would turn out to be worth a darn, but the chances were awfully low. I mean, if he is such a catch, why is he trolling for women in a public park?

I always thought the best way to meet someone was to just be an interesting person with interests, not approach random women largely based on how they look.

But hey, maybe the dating scene has changed. I've been out of it for about 25 years . . . .

Well to me, if a guy walks up to a woman on a public tennis court, it would mean two things. One, they are interested in exchanging numbers or two, they like the way she plays. For me, any female who can hit well they get my attention because its rare for me. It isn't always based on appearance, but with ability. If she's as good as me, around a 3 to 3.5, then we can say we share the same interests. Just maybe I can add another tennis buddy....

NickH87
06-24-2009, 07:18 PM
It's always interesting to hear guys talk about this stuff.

I dunno, maybe I'm just really conservative or something. But if a strange guy approached me and showed interest, this was . . . . well, I don't know anything about him. He is only interested based on appearance, not personality. I just never saw much upside in it for me, you know? It felt like buying a lottery ticket -- yeah, maybe he would turn out to be worth a darn, but the chances were awfully low. I mean, if he is such a catch, why is he trolling for women in a public park?

I always thought the best way to meet someone was to just be an interesting person with interests, not approach random women largely based on how they look.

But hey, maybe the dating scene has changed. I've been out of it for about 25 years . . . .

Well speaking for a younger generation, currently 21 years of age, the most "socially acceptable" places to meet women are probably the same as it was when you were our age. Bars, parties, clubs, socials...church, supermarkets. I speak for probably 75% of guys, maybe more, the primary reason we make a move on girls is because we like the way they look. Theres no way to find our her personality without something gathering our interest. Though it isnt the first place I would choose to approach a chick, does it not show confidence and guts to be doing something that 90% of the guys wont do because they are afraid of being rejected???

sureshs
06-25-2009, 05:23 AM
does it not show confidence and guts to be doing something that 90% of the guys wont do because they are afraid of being rejected???


Or looking like a perv. There is a big difference.

Power Player
06-25-2009, 05:54 AM
It is all on the internet now

LOL..yeah if you are afraid to talk to people in person.

Power Player
06-25-2009, 06:08 AM
Well speaking for a younger generation, currently 21 years of age, the most "socially acceptable" places to meet women are probably the same as it was when you were our age. Bars, parties, clubs, socials...church, supermarkets. I speak for probably 75% of guys, maybe more, the primary reason we make a move on girls is because we like the way they look. Theres no way to find our her personality without something gathering our interest. Though it isnt the first place I would choose to approach a chick, does it not show confidence and guts to be doing something that 90% of the guys wont do because they are afraid of being rejected???

Yeah I agree with this. How exactly are we supposed to approach girls? Is it trolling if you make eye contact with a girl on a court and end up talking to her? Sorry Cindy, but I don't think it is.

I'd rather meet a girl who is into fitness and tennis then pick up another chic at a bar that parties all week. I have done that way too many times.

raiden031
06-25-2009, 08:03 AM
I mean, if he is such a catch, why is he trolling for women in a public park?


Depends what you mean by trolling. If you come to the park to play tennis and notice an attractive woman, is it trolling to decide you want to meet her? Thats different than to go to the courts with the only goal being to find women to approach.


I always thought the best way to meet someone was to just be an interesting person with interests, not approach random women largely based on how they look.


Once someone reaches the age where they are beyond school, its very difficult to find yourself in a social situation where you have the ability to talk to new people without having to randomly approach someone first to get the conversation started.

NickH87
06-25-2009, 08:59 AM
Or looking like a perv. There is a big difference.

Well heres the difference, if someone saw a nice looking girl and went over to her, said hi, i think you are hot, let me give you a call sometime....maybe thats a little perv, but its straight forward and his intentions are direct.

Or you can go the other way, walk over, compliment her on her tennis, let her know that you are looking for some new hitting partners and if it all works well arrange to meet on a later date without even trying for a number close....

Either way you are doing what you want to do and you wont have to drive home thinking "what if.."

thejackal
06-26-2009, 09:59 AM
Yeah I agree with this. How exactly are we supposed to approach girls? Is it trolling if you make eye contact with a girl on a court and end up talking to her? Sorry Cindy, but I don't think it is.

I'd rather meet a girl who is into fitness and tennis then pick up another chic at a bar that parties all week. I have done that way too many times.

99% of girls will not come over to start a conversation with a guy, even if she is interested. as for looks, of course Id rather go talk to a girl I find attractive, because at least there is a chance that I like her personality TOO, whereas what's the point of going to talk that way to a girl I dont find attractive.

r2473
06-26-2009, 11:29 AM
This thread is hilarious for so many reasons.

sureshs
06-26-2009, 11:32 AM
99% of girls will not come over to start a conversation with a guy, even if she is interested. as for looks, of course Id rather go talk to a girl I find attractive, because at least there is a chance that I like her personality TOO, whereas what's the point of going to talk that way to a girl I dont find attractive.

Then what the unattractive girls supposed to do?

kanjii
06-26-2009, 12:02 PM
Take a tennis class at a junior college...that's where I found my girlfriends...some just learning but others can really play.

raiden031
06-26-2009, 12:20 PM
Then what the unattractive girls supposed to do?

Whatever they want to do. There is no rule that says girls can't approach guys, but most just don't do it.

During my days in high school and college, I was approached by a few girls, most of which I knew either as co-workers at my part-time job or maybe through friends at school, and even a few random encounters. Whats interesting is that they were mostly unattractive to me (and most often overweight).

So it seems attractive girls do not approach guys because they don't need to, and have plenty of choice among guys who are showing interest in them, whereas less attractive girls have to resort to the things that even good-looking guys have to do, which is to be very forward, approach randomly, and receive alot of rejections in the process in order to find a mate.

Frodo Baggins
06-26-2009, 12:26 PM
Me I don't Do either.. I'm No Megan fox.. but I'm no ugly Ducking either.. But I Never Ever Don't approch guys...(The guys want Me To approch Them, I want A guy To approch me..= It's a stand Off:twisted:) What Do you Do With A standoff??? ;)

thejackal
06-26-2009, 12:53 PM
So it seems attractive girls do not approach guys because they don't need to, and have plenty of choice among guys who are showing interest in them, whereas less attractive girls have to resort to the things that even good-looking guys have to do, which is to be very forward, approach randomly, and receive alot of rejections in the process in order to find a mate.

+1

Plus from personal experience, ever a lot of my less physically attractive girl friends get attention (often the creepy variety).

Roberto
06-26-2009, 01:12 PM
Any good tennis pick-up lines ?

thejackal
06-26-2009, 01:16 PM
pickup lines do not work. just be the least creepy as u can, and start a conversation like you would with a guy

gocard
06-26-2009, 02:36 PM
This is kind of an amusing thread. I also rarely see women in their mid-late 20s at the courts who aren't there with their boyfriends, or who aren't complete beginners. None of my female friends really play - I think most women who are better players actually play on the leagues, something I'm not interested in. I end up playing with all my guy friends which might be warding off other guys from approaching... Plus, most guys at my local courts are either middle aged and up, or high school and under. Not exactly the right age range! :)

However, this never stops the creepy guy at our local court from wanting to come play doubles with us! He only gives "lessons" to female beginners as his side job. I guess there is a creepy guy for every court ;)

Cindysphinx
06-26-2009, 02:39 PM
Whatever they want to do. There is no rule that says girls can't approach guys, but most just don't do it.

During my days in high school and college, I was approached by a few girls, most of which I knew either as co-workers at my part-time job or maybe through friends at school, and even a few random encounters. Whats interesting is that they were mostly unattractive to me (and most often overweight).

So it seems attractive girls do not approach guys because they don't need to, and have plenty of choice among guys who are showing interest in them, whereas less attractive girls have to resort to the things that even good-looking guys have to do, which is to be very forward, approach randomly, and receive alot of rejections in the process in order to find a mate.

::shudder::

Like I said, it is interesting to hear guys talk about stuff like this. . . .

skraggle
06-26-2009, 03:36 PM
::shudder::

Like I said, it is interesting to hear guys talk about stuff like this. . . .

Cindy-

Let it be said LOUD and CLEAR that these opinions do not categorically represent all of us man types. The OP needs to understand that to attract women, you must first respect women.

He's got a way to go in that regard.

thejackal
06-26-2009, 04:05 PM
agreed with skraggle's post 100%. at the same time, I find it important to acknowledge certain challenges men in general are faced when trying to attract women. As I've said before, most women (in my experience) will not overtly approach guys even if they are VERY interested. Conversely, lots of guys who have less experience will appear weird and creepy when approaching girls, especially in non-bar/club situations. There's a lot of social stigma attached to talking with strangers, so most people will not do it on a regular basis, or at least often enough so that they come across the right way.

even if a man is able to get the girl's number and arrange for a date (or in this case, a tennis game), it is still generally his "responsibility" to take the relationship to the next level. its like in "Hitch," the guy has to go 90, then the girl, if she's interested, will go 10. the point is, the guy has to go 90 first. if the girl is not interested, the guy will probably get humiliated. if he goes 100, chances are charges will be filed. from my personal experience, girls will VERY VERY rarely make the first sexual move unless they are inebriated (in that case common social conditioning are overridden by libido, so that's another ballgame). recently I was out with a girl I met who was very open sexually (she's bi and currently has a girlfriend). still she made no attempts to escalate physically or kiss me until she was in my bed, and even then I had to lie her down next to me and go "90" first.

take my post with a grain of salt, but that's the way I see things.

dennis10is
06-26-2009, 04:16 PM
This is kind of an amusing thread. I also rarely see women in their mid-late 20s at the courts who aren't there with their boyfriends, or who aren't complete beginners. None of my female friends really play - I think most women who are better players actually play on the leagues, something I'm not interested in. I end up playing with all my guy friends which might be warding off other guys from approaching... Plus, most guys at my local courts are either middle aged and up, or high school and under. Not exactly the right age range! :)

However, this never stops the creepy guy at our local court from wanting to come play doubles with us! He only gives "lessons" to female beginners as his side job. I guess there is a creepy guy for every court ;)

There are more than just one creepy guy in every park/club.

My typical pickup lines are: I try to use them all in the first five minutes to meeting any woman.

Today is not such a good day, I lost X millions on the stock market. I don't care about myself but my four charities are fund by the stocks I gave them, so I feel for the kids, senior, sick, and mentally ********.

I guess I just have to take another X millions from my personal porfolio to make up the difference.


Ouch my back is acting up. Ever since I made a night time HALO (High Attitude Low Opening) jump into Afghanistan during a winter storm to save an orphanage and strained my back, it acts up at the most inopportune time. Like last week, when I ran into a burning building to save this family.

I feel so embarassed that I have to wear custom made shorts because as a 6'6" male with a 32 inch waist, I can only wear small/medium sized shorts, but even the baggy ones are a little tight in the manhood area. The boys are squeezed even when I'm in my ice soak so I have to have my shorts tailored. No, I'm not wearing a cod piece, that's just me in my "restful" state.

Can you tell which Ferrari in the parking lot is mine? Did I take the Black, or the Grey one. Wait, I think I took the red one. I have so many, it is so, so difficult to keep track.

gocard
06-26-2009, 04:43 PM
There are more than just one creepy guy in every park/club.

My typical pickup lines are: I try to use them all in the first five minutes to meeting any woman.

Can you tell which Ferrari in the parking lot is mine? Did I take the Black, or the Grey one. Wait, I think I took the red one. I have so many, it is so, so difficult to keep track.

haha which courts do you frequent again? *mental note not to play there* j/k Although I did actually hear one guy talking really loudly about his car collection...so your pickup line may not be too original there :)

r2473
06-26-2009, 05:23 PM
Eloquently stated.

you know the song, right? I think it sums up the thread perfectly.

Power Player
06-27-2009, 11:15 AM
99% of girls will not come over to start a conversation with a guy, even if she is interested. as for looks, of course Id rather go talk to a girl I find attractive, because at least there is a chance that I like her personality TOO, whereas what's the point of going to talk that way to a girl I dont find attractive.

Right. So you are agreeing with me then? LOL

I never said that girls would come over and talk, but I do think eye contact from a girl is a nice sign of interest that a guy must capitalize on if he wants to pursue her.

thejackal
06-27-2009, 11:55 AM
Right. So you are agreeing with me then? LOL

I never said that girls would come over and talk, but I do think eye contact from a girl is a nice sign of interest that a guy must capitalize on if he wants to pursue her.

I was agreeing with you. I'm just flabbergasted when women think that guys approaching them are systematically creepy, when they systematically do not approach men.

Raindown
06-27-2009, 02:08 PM
I'm just flabbergasted when women think that guys approaching them are systematically creepy, when they systematically do not approach men.

Quoted for Truth.

raiden031
06-28-2009, 03:39 AM
I was agreeing with you. I'm just flabbergasted when women think that guys approaching them are systematically creepy, when they systematically do not approach men.

I'm sure if a smooth talking, attractive guy approaches them, it isn't considered creepy. Its the ones who are maybe less attractive or a little socially awkward because they don't have the right skills to do it that get the bad rap. I don't like hearing the word 'creepy', because it implies the guy could be up to no good, but really the word is used to describe any guy that doesn't spark their interest.

thejackal
06-28-2009, 04:41 AM
I'm sure if a smooth talking, attractive guy approaches them, it isn't considered creepy. Its the ones who are maybe less attractive or a little socially awkward because they don't have the right skills to do it that get the bad rap. I don't like hearing the word 'creepy', because it implies the guy could be up to no good, but really the word is used to describe any guy that doesn't spark their interest.

I believe that looks do not matter to women nearly as much as they do to men. I find it's more about how the man carries himself and presents his personality that matters. The sad thing is that many socially awkward guys are actually great people with lots to offer, while equally many "smooth talking, attractive" guys are just no good at all other than their appearances.

Cindysphinx
06-28-2009, 04:49 AM
I'm sure if a smooth talking, attractive guy approaches them, it isn't considered creepy. Its the ones who are maybe less attractive or a little socially awkward because they don't have the right skills to do it that get the bad rap. I don't like hearing the word 'creepy', because it implies the guy could be up to no good, but really the word is used to describe any guy that doesn't spark their interest.

Opinions and experiences with this vary, of course.

But there are many women -- myself included -- who simply do not appreciate advances from strange men, even "smooth-talking" ones. *Especially* smooth-talking ones.

Believe me, the "creep" factor is very high, and I don't mean "serial killer." I mean, when a strange guy approaches you out of the blue, all you know is that he thinks you are reasonably attractive and would like to sleep with you. That's it. You have no other information to go on. Is he married? Can he hold down a job? Is he a jerk? Is he stupid? Is he interested in a hook-up and nothing more? Does he share your values? Is he drowning in debt? Does he have a bunch of kids from a bunch of relationships?

So what kind of advances do make sense and are likely to receive a positive response from someone like me? A guy is in your biking club and one day he asks you out to coffee after a ride. A guy who works for a vendor that does business with your employer strikes up a conversation. A friend hosts a party and a guy mingles with you that night and then asks for your number. And of course if I'm interested in him, I will find ways to strike up a conversation and bump into him. I won't blatantly ask him out, no matter how attracted to him I might be.

All I'm saying is that you can approach women on tennis courts all you want. Totally up to you. Just try to understand that some women might not find this appealing, and it isn't because there is something wrong with them. In fact, developing a deeper understanding of how it feels to receive attention from strange males might make you a bit more successful should you choose to make a move anyway.

cak
06-28-2009, 07:22 AM
As Cindy says, opinions and experiences vary. I have never found being approached by men creepy. I have found most to be quite interesting people. Most were trying to get a tennis game, or really wanted to know about my bike. A few actually were trying to pick up on me, which in my married state, was quite the ego boost. Once out of my college years I haven't run into any that were trying to pick up on me but weren't gracious when I turned them down.

And after 25 married years, stepping back into the dating world. It is totally different than is was 25 years ago. Men are much more aware of what is considered stalker behavior than they were back then. Even at bars, men will give you their numbers rather than ask you for yours, as it lets the woman be in charge.

raiden031
06-28-2009, 07:29 AM
Opinions and experiences with this vary, of course.

But there are many women -- myself included -- who simply do not appreciate advances from strange men, even "smooth-talking" ones. *Especially* smooth-talking ones.

Believe me, the "creep" factor is very high, and I don't mean "serial killer." I mean, when a strange guy approaches you out of the blue, all you know is that he thinks you are reasonably attractive and would like to sleep with you. That's it. You have no other information to go on. Is he married? Can he hold down a job? Is he a jerk? Is he stupid? Is he interested in a hook-up and nothing more? Does he share your values? Is he drowning in debt? Does he have a bunch of kids from a bunch of relationships?


I don't think it should be taken as they only want to sleep with you, unless thats they say something to imply that. I know that sometimes guys at a club will sometimes approach women with dirty talk, and they deserve the 'creep' status. But I don't think offering to buy someone a drink and taking it slow is worthy of creep status.


So what kind of advances do make sense and are likely to receive a positive response from someone like me? A guy is in your biking club and one day he asks you out to coffee after a ride. A guy who works for a vendor that does business with your employer strikes up a conversation. A friend hosts a party and a guy mingles with you that night and then asks for your number. And of course if I'm interested in him, I will find ways to strike up a conversation and bump into him. I won't blatantly ask him out, no matter how attracted to him I might be.


I don't think these approaches are much different than approaching someone on a tennis court. What matters is the dialog of the conversation, not where or how it gets started. If you approach them on the tennis court and start talking to them about something they can relate to, thats better than immediately asking for their number or telling them they are hot or something.


All I'm saying is that you can approach women on tennis courts all you want. Totally up to you. Just try to understand that some women might not find this appealing, and it isn't because there is something wrong with them. In fact, developing a deeper understanding of how it feels to receive attention from strange males might make you a bit more successful should you choose to make a move anyway.

When I was in college, a friend of mine who was gay invited me to a gay club for his b-day celebration. I was reluctant to go but decided to do it eventually. I learned what its like for an attractive woman who walks into a bar. Most of the guys were probably 30-40s, so I walk in and see alot of people staring at me, being early 20s. I was with my gay friend and a couple girls as well and just stayed with them. One guy kept making eye contact with me the whole night, and eventually approached me and I told him I was straight...LOL. Then another guy started trying to dance with me on the dance floor (I was dancing with the girls I came with), and then the guy asked me if I was straight because either 1) I was a lousy dancer or 2) I was clinging to these girls the whole night. I felt like a piece of meat at that place.

But anyways, I think the guys who are trying to get in someone's pants ruin it for those that are just looking to meet someone to possibly find a long term relationship. Sometimes I am embarrased to be a guy because of the behavior I witness at bars, but still when I was single, the way women often acted tended to frustrate me because they play hard to get and judge people without knowing them.

thejackal
06-28-2009, 07:45 AM
I don't think it should be taken as they only want to sleep with you, unless thats they say something to imply that. I know that sometimes guys at a club will sometimes approach women with dirty talk, and they deserve the 'creep' status. But I don't think offering to buy someone a drink and taking it slow is worthy of creep status.

As a personal rule I never buy drinks for girls I just met. I find the concept disgusting and there are better ways to retain her attention anyway. Any girl who asks me to buy her a drink gets nothing - no drink, and no more of my time.



I don't think these approaches are much different than approaching someone on a tennis court. What matters is the dialog of the conversation, not where or how it gets started. If you approach them on the tennis court and start talking to them about something they can relate to, thats better than immediately asking for their number or telling them they are hot or something.

Absolutely. The worst thing a man can do is telegraph sexual interest too early. It's not to be dishonest. Girls who open a conversation with me with "Do you have a girlfriend" or "You have a nice ***" are serious red flags too, so it goes both ways. It not that I will be immediately turned off by it, but there's less of a chance that I'll really become attracted to the girl, because she'd seem a bit too easy to get.



When I was in college, a friend of mine who was gay invited me to a gay club for his b-day celebration. I was reluctant to go but decided to do it eventually. I learned what its like for an attractive woman who walks into a bar. Most of the guys were probably 30-40s, so I walk in and see alot of people staring at me, being early 20s. I was with my gay friend and a couple girls as well and just stayed with them. One guy kept making eye contact with me the whole night, and eventually approached me and I told him I was straight...LOL. Then another guy started trying to dance with me on the dance floor (I was dancing with the girls I came with), and then the guy asked me if I was straight because either 1) I was a lousy dancer or 2) I was clinging to these girls the whole night. I felt like a piece of meat at that place.

But anyways, I think the guys who are trying to get in someone's pants ruin it for those that are just looking to meet someone to possibly find a long term relationship. Sometimes I am embarrased to be a guy because of the behavior I witness at bars, but still when I was single, the way women often acted tended to frustrate me because they play hard to get and judge people without knowing them.

I have never been to a gay bar, but a couple of my male friends have very similar (if not creepier) experiences. As for the ineptitude of other men, generally there's no need to be embarrassed, as it only makes things easier for guys who know what they are doing (i.e. us, hopefully). That's another matter if said men are your friends with whom you go to bars/clubs/hang out with girls with. Either let them know what they're doing wrong and let them change (let them, forcing is mostly futile in these situations), or stop hanging out with them.

Cindysphinx
06-28-2009, 07:48 AM
Speaking of creepy . . .

This morning, I went for a run with my dog. I like to run in a nearby neighborhood of gorgeous mansions.

I was going along, and this (white -- you will see the significance of his race later) guy drove up and asked where a certain street was. He was headed the opposite direction I had been going, so he spoke to me through his passenger's window. No biggie. I told him to keep going straight and he'd run into it.

And that is where the conversation should have ended.

Instead, he says something along these lines:

"This is a beautiful neighborhood, isn't it? I just love these old houses. The people who live here are really rich. I went to high school right over there, actually. I loved it, but then we moved to Springfield, Massachusettes. It's not nearly as nice. You know the biggest problem they have there? The police."

By this point, I had taken note of the fact that there was no one else around. Not good. He continued thusly:

"Yeah, the police there really give you a hard time. Especially if you are black, you know?"

He continued on, leaving me to wonder what his interactions were with the police that would cause him to form an opinion about how the police in that city are treating blacks. Most white guys I know wouldn't follow racial profiling or brutality cases closely enough to opine about it to a woman on the street. I picked up my dog's poop and wondered whether it would make a better weapon if I threw it or smeared it on myself.

He had continued talking, and I picked up the conversation:

"Yeah, my mom is 85 now, although she looks 65. She's in really good shape. I'd really like to move her back down here . . . "

At this point I decided to make a break for it, yelled "Good luck!" and continued running in the opposite direction he was driving.

Maybe he was a friendly guy looking for some conversation.

Or maybe he was Ted Bundy's kid brother. I didn't care to find out.

thejackal
06-28-2009, 08:06 AM
interesting post cindy. can't blame you. the vibe he was giving off was just weird. hopefully this thread can be a good resource for other posters who are not quite at ease with the dating aspect.

Power Player
06-28-2009, 08:40 AM
I agree with a lot of this stuff, but I also think looks matter a lot more to girls then many guys are willing to admit.

thejackal
06-28-2009, 10:31 AM
I agree with a lot of this stuff, but I also think looks matter a lot more to girls then many guys are willing to admit.

yes and no. I will probably be attracted to say, gisele bundchen, if she was wearing a potato bag and hasn't washed her feet in 3 weeks. on the other hand, even good looking guys would not be attractive to women if they were badly groomed, had no fashion sense or had horrible body language. there's a biological function to this - for all of mankind men are "trained" to look for potentially fertile mates (hence the emphasis on physical beauty) while women are more apt to look for a partner who can provide for her and her descendants while passing desirable traits down to them.

basically:

women are born beautiful (or not), men can be trained to be

personal anecdote: if I were to make a list of the most attractive girls Ive been with, and another one of the ones I was most in love with, the same names wouldn't necessarily appear twice.

sureshs
06-28-2009, 11:28 AM
When I was in college, a friend of mine who was gay invited me to a gay club for his b-day celebration. I was reluctant to go but decided to do it eventually.

Yeah yeah we believe you ...

sureshs
06-28-2009, 11:31 AM
Maybe he was a friendly guy looking for some conversation.

Or maybe he was Ted Bundy's kid brother. I didn't care to find out.

Maybe you are just too attractive to men

Cindysphinx
06-28-2009, 11:46 AM
I do attract my share of psychos. Maybe it is part of living in big cities for the last 20+ years, I dunno.

I had a doozie several years ago. At the time, I commuted to work on the Metro, which gets very crowded in the mornings. I was standing because all the seats were taken, just gazing off into space lost in my own thoughts. Minding my own business.

There was this guy standing next to me. He's tall, chubby, middle-aged. He catches my eye and says the following to me:

"Ever fire a weapon?"

Everyone whips their head around to look at this guy. I had absolutely no idea what to say. I mean, the Long Island Train Shootings had occurred a few years before. All I could manage to say was, "No." He said, "You should try it."

The train pulled into a station, and several people nearby scurried off. It was not a station you would get off at, as we were still in the suburbs. They were bailing. I didn't get off, as I was afraid he would follow me and that might be worse. So I stood there. He didn't say anything else and got off at the first stop where commuters would normally get off, and I stayed on the train. Sweating profusely, I might add.

Yeah, weirdos just love me. :)

To tie this into our discussion in Adult League & Tournament Talk: You think maybe he played USTA league tennis? :)

Cindysphinx
06-28-2009, 11:50 AM
I agree with a lot of this stuff, but I also think looks matter a lot more to girls then many guys are willing to admit.

I'd say that women have a much more broad definition of what can be considered attractive. A few extra pounds here, a little baldness there, not tall enough -- it's all something you can grow to love if the guy is otherwise a keeper. How else to explain Martina Hingis and Radek Stepaneck?

Guys who aren't especially attractive or who have deficiencies in certain areas can do quite well. Personality is really important to women, much more so than guys know.

Topaz
06-28-2009, 02:06 PM
Cindy, RE the metro guy...you should have to done the 'car' shuffle...get off of one car, back into another one! I've done it my fair share of times!!!

Personality is really important to women, much more so than guys know.

+1!!!

onehandbh
06-28-2009, 02:19 PM
Personality is really important to women, much more so than guys know.

so is money. at least for some women.

on the flipside. i think guys will put up with a lot if the girl is
hot.

raiden031
06-28-2009, 02:25 PM
As a personal rule I never buy drinks for girls I just met. I find the concept disgusting and there are better ways to retain her attention anyway. Any girl who asks me to buy her a drink gets nothing - no drink, and no more of my time.


I've never bought a drink for someone at a bar during my single days. Its a waste of money because usually they just take the drink and walk away. The only time I would've bought someone a drink is if we talked for a while and she seemed interested in talking to me, then I would offer the drink. Never had a chance to get this far because the bar scene didn't really work for me. I was the type who needed the woman to make the first move. :)

Cindysphinx
06-28-2009, 03:18 PM
so is money. at least for some women.

on the flipside. i think guys will put up with a lot if the girl is
hot.

I don't know how important money is. I think a lot of guys attribute their failures to their lack of money, but that is rarely the problem.

I think most women want a guy who is "going places," meaning has some drive and ambition in their field and can hold down a job/career. Laziness is a huge turn-off. I don't think all that many women are true gold-diggers. I think this is especially so now that women can earn their own money and have high-flying careers.

So if you can't get a girl, you probably should be a bit nicer.

::narrows eyes at OP::

onehandbh
06-28-2009, 03:41 PM
I don't know how important money is. I think a lot of guys attribute their failures to their lack of money, but that is rarely the problem.

I think most women want a guy who is "going places," meaning has some drive and ambition in their field and can hold down a job/career.

Potential for money. Actually, I don't think it is actually money. It's what
money can provide. Security, comfort, access, status, etc. Things most
people wouldn't mind. I mean who wouldn't want to be able to travel
to exotic destinations and buy whatever they want or donate to charities
they believe in.



So if you can't get a girl, you probably should be a bit nicer.
::narrows eyes at OP::

Just don't fall into desperation. Scares girls away like nothing else.
If you are generally happy with your life, productive, have goals, and
look forward to each day, don't look like a troll, and don't have any
social weirdness issues, I think you shouldn't have a problem.

raiden031
06-28-2009, 04:31 PM
I think most women want a guy who is "going places," meaning has some drive and ambition in their field and can hold down a job/career. Laziness is a huge turn-off. I don't think all that many women are true gold-diggers. I think this is especially so now that women can earn their own money and have high-flying careers.


I think pretty much every woman is initially most attracted to a guy who presents themselves with confidence. Its not about money, looks, or even a good personality so much. Confidence enhances someone with average looks and adds personality. Even if they are a jerk, they are more interesting to a woman than a guy who is nice and a good person, but not as confident.

It doesn't matter that the guy is 'going places' until they are contemplating whether to become an exclusive couple. That is when the nice guy usually prevails...but its hard for the nice guy to get past the initial meeting to make it to this point.

This is my theory after knowing a couple of guys back in the day who basically could get any girl of their choosing. The most common thing I find is that they are good at picking up women from just about anywhere because they are smooth talkers, but end up terrible boyfriends who lie, cheat, and use them.

thejackal
06-28-2009, 04:46 PM
The most common thing I find is that they are good at picking up women from just about anywhere because they are smooth talkers, but end up terrible boyfriends who lie, cheat, and use them.

ya............

Power Player
06-29-2009, 10:04 AM
I just have a some buddies who have model looks and get a ton of girls when we go out. I do fine myself, but these guys get #s with zero work. The flipside is that they are players and can not committ to one girl. But what is funny is that the girls will say "i know you are a player..i shouldn't do this but.." Lol...it's just funny to me how that goes for them just based off of looks. Of course, I live in a very superficial area. Orlando and Miami are infamous.

BTW the subway story cracked me up. It's amazing what some guys will say to try and meet girls.

sureshs
06-29-2009, 10:29 AM
BTW the subway story cracked me up. It's amazing what some guys will say to try and meet girls.

Cindy's story? I doubt if he was trying to pick her up (but to be fair, many strangers seem to find her irresistible).

I think it was just a bored guy who was pretending to be weird to have some fun. At least I hope so.

Bad Dog
06-29-2009, 11:47 AM
I just have a some buddies who have model looks and get a ton of girls when we go out. I do fine myself, but these guys get #s with zero work. The flipside is that they are players and can not committ to one girl. But what is funny is that the girls will say "i know you are a player..i shouldn't do this but.." Lol...it's just funny to me how that goes for them just based off of looks.


So it sounds like females who believe that handsome male players will “commit” may seem as foolish as males who believe that female hotties won't be terribly expensive to “date” :)

r2473
06-30-2009, 10:59 AM
Well, Ive made up my mind, I must find someone that plays, and preferably at a higher lever (4.0+)
All though it seems the Ratio of Guy to girls is about 10-1.
And you rarely see 2 girls hitting, or looking for a pick up game. Usually hitting with their boyfriends.

So, How does one go about finding Single female player? Im sure I'm not the only one wondering this??

And are women the same way? I mean if girl is single would she too be looking for a player/partner?? Or do women prefer not to play with guys for the most part??

They have these "social" mixers, but they arent really singles specific, and they really arent THAT social. I mean I might be playing on one court while someone i might like is on another court... so hows that help me??

Now I know being a tennis player isn't the only quality to consider, but it sure helps a lot!

Im wondering if most of the realatively younger girls that play are single? especially if they arent playing with their (obvious) BF?
Like when Im out playing and the ladies league shows up...:twisted:


the floor is open:

So, did the friendly TW posters fully answer all you dating questions? Armed with all of this knowledge, I suspect that the little tennis "hotties" will be yours for the taking.

Go get 'em tiger!!

Atown
07-08-2009, 10:39 AM
Tennis.com has an interesting new article that's somewhat on topic: http://www.tennis.com/features/general/features.aspx?id=179706

coloskier
07-08-2009, 11:32 AM
I think pretty much every woman is initially most attracted to a guy who presents themselves with confidence. Its not about money, looks, or even a good personality so much. Confidence enhances someone with average looks and adds personality. Even if they are a jerk, they are more interesting to a woman than a guy who is nice and a good person, but not as confident.

It doesn't matter that the guy is 'going places' until they are contemplating whether to become an exclusive couple. That is when the nice guy usually prevails...but its hard for the nice guy to get past the initial meeting to make it to this point.

This is my theory after knowing a couple of guys back in the day who basically could get any girl of their choosing. The most common thing I find is that they are good at picking up women from just about anywhere because they are smooth talkers, but end up terrible boyfriends who lie, cheat, and use them.

That is because most hot women like "bad" men. They always think they can change them. WRONG!!!!!!

Tennisman912
07-08-2009, 08:12 PM
Interesting topic. Raiden031 and thejackal have hit it on the head. If the young women is what most would consider to be attractive, she will be approached and probably hit on constantly so they don’t have much incentive to go up to a guy they might like. Why? Because batting their eyes and showing some interest is all it ever took in the past. They have been trained by society that they are desirable and will be approached. In fact, they usually have the opposite problem. It is a game to get rid of the vast majority of guys who do approach who they don’t find “worthy.”

Only the fuggly girls have to take some initiative before time passes them by. The more attractive ones have more opportunities to meet new people (read potential mates) so only on very rare occasions do they take the initiative (except maybe under the influence) IMHO.

Drop the pick up lines. You don’t need them. Just show some respect, project the confidence that you have your crap together (and actually having it together helps), have a sense of humor about the whole thing and go say hello. Almost any women will at least talk to you a bit as long as you look respectable. Remember, even if they are single, they might have just got out of a relationship (or divorced and consider all men pigs either temporarily or permanently), they may lie about a relationship, make up a relationship, may not be interested in meeting someone new, consider anyone approaching them as suspect like Cindy and not like being approached at all (which is certainly their right), or they could be involved. The point being you never know the situation unless you go say hello. And you just might find a new tennis partner or friend. You don’t know if they are worth getting to know unless you find out. What you say is of little importance as most communication is nonverbal.

As Cindy shows, no method is going to do well all the time as every lady (and guy) are different and what one likes the next may not. But just because you may blow it or they aren't interested, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t say hello. Be yourself and say hello. Maybe you just met your wife (although statistically speaking you have a better chance of being struck by lightening at that moment). What can I say? I am an optimist. Personality is all it takes unless you are missing all your teeth and consider a muscle shirt as “formal wear.” Don't laugh too hard about the formal wear comment. Years ago, right after I got out of a long term relationship, the young ladies I worked with suggested I get a tattoo and a nice pickup truck and sell the Lexus I drove at the time. I wish I were kidding but alas, I am not (and no, I didn't follow their advice).

And Raiden, don’t underestimate gay/lesbian bars. They are good environments for straight folks as well. I hope the reason why should be obvious.

As far as meeting a young lady on the court, it is pretty rare to meet a single 25-40 single women who is a good player. They are few and far between. In my experience, the better the player the more likely they are involved speaking from the point of view of someone in their 30s. At college age I would probably have a different opinion.

Best of luck

TM

Tennisman912
07-08-2009, 08:19 PM
Cindy,
That is funny about you always seeming to attract the “interesting” guys. I have a few lady friends who also have that problem for reasons that can’t be explained. It is amazing how accurate your sixth sense can be.

TM

thejackal
07-09-2009, 06:18 AM
speaking of 6th sense. I got hit on by a dude in the elevator the other day. Im usually a very talkative person but I was just doing my best to avoid eye contact and sticking with 1 word answers to his questions, basically trying to display as little personality as possible. very freaky and annoying at the time, but as a man you learn from these things and they help understand how it's like for women when you're trying to meet them.

princess bossass
07-09-2009, 06:47 AM
Well, crap. I'm single, play tennis, and I'm not exactly over the hill! Guess I'm ugly!!!

Me too! Although, my guess is according to these guys, the fact I'm 30 means I *am* over the hill. :)

But anyway, gentlemen, there ARE women out there who are unattached AND play tennis -- some even with great enthusiasm, such as myself (though I'm not a 4.0). I love the sport passionately, and if my BF did too, I'd do my best to keep up with him, and if our match-up was unsatisfying to him I'd be more than willing to go to the courts with him and hit around with another partner while he hit with someone else. I can't imagine any other women really into tennis would feel any differently. My ex (far my tennis superior) and I hit together all the time, though he also had other hitting partners more his level whom he really enjoyed playing. He was always helpful and encouraging to me, which I really appreciated, even when I was being the occasional drag.

Also, some of those women you see might be hitting with guys who aren't their BFs... I hit with four different guys, all of whom have GFs... who aren't me.

Lastly, this summer, look for the girl drinking club soda alone at the sports bar, where she sweet-talked the bartender into putting on the US Open series. She's probably not at the bar to pick up men, but if you want to talk to her about tennis, she'll be open to that and maybe you can weasel your way into something more interesting :wink:

Topaz
07-09-2009, 06:50 AM
Me too! Although, my guess is according to these guys, the fact I'm 30 means I *am* over the hill. :)


Maybe we should form a club of 'those' women? :)

Though, does this mean you and Mr. Bossass are no more?

I'd wondered what happened to you...regardless, nice to see you posting again!

And you bring up good points...I hit with a lot of guys, and I'm not dating any of them. Guys, just 'cause you see a gal on court with some guys, doesn't mean she is 'attached' to any of them.

Grover Sparkman
07-09-2009, 06:53 AM
Maybe we should form a club of 'those' women? :)


Maybe you could form en masse and wear special t-shirts so as to be easily identifiable? :lol:

Topaz
07-09-2009, 06:55 AM
^^^Oh, another great idea!!! They would be neon pink, as well, so we stand out!

princess bossass
07-09-2009, 07:38 AM
Maybe we should form a club of 'those' women? :)

Though, does this mean you and Mr. Bossass are no more?

I'd wondered what happened to you...regardless, nice to see you posting again!

And you bring up good points...I hit with a lot of guys, and I'm not dating any of them. Guys, just 'cause you see a gal on court with some guys, doesn't mean she is 'attached' to any of them.

Oh, you're so sweet! Yes, Bossass and I have amicably gone our separate ways. I left for Chicago two years ago, and we finally decided it was time to move on. I should probably get a new screenname, huh? :wink:

But what actually "happened to me" (teehee!) as far as posting frequency was I was studying for my qualifying exam for a year--but I passed! So I'm no longer banned from internet forums or anything else time-sucking.

Maybe you could form en masse and wear special t-shirts so as to be easily identifiable? :lol:

Ahahaha! Actually LOL'ed at that one.

^^^Oh, another great idea!!! They would be neon pink, as well, so we stand out!

Ooooo, I have to wonder if Nadal's pepto-pink number at the FO taught us a valuable lesson about pink and tennis...

Topaz
07-09-2009, 07:42 AM
Congratulations! And wow...I'm impressed by your willpower to be able to stay away from the 'time-suck'.

Oh, I was *not* a fan of the Nadal pink. We'll have to pick a different color for our club shirts!

The_Question
07-09-2009, 07:46 AM
I hit with four different guys, all of whom have GFs... who aren't me.


LOL, nice!!

r2473
07-09-2009, 10:45 AM
^^^^At first I thought she said she "hit it" with 4 guys all of whom have GFs... who aren't me.

I was going to ask

"At the same time"?

Grover Sparkman
07-09-2009, 10:59 AM
Congratulations! And wow...I'm impressed by your willpower to be able to stay away from the 'time-suck'.

Oh, I was *not* a fan of the Nadal pink. We'll have to pick a different color for our club shirts!

It needs not be anything flashy.

Skywalker91
07-09-2009, 03:50 PM
Lol my girlfriend doesn't like tennis, she still comes to my high school matches and supports me and she's been to a tournament. She refuses to play though. Oh well maybe someday.

drakulie
07-09-2009, 05:42 PM
women who play tennis, do it not because they love tennis, but rather>>>> love playing with balls.

Proceed with caution.

~Drakulie

TsongaEatingAPineappleLol
07-09-2009, 05:44 PM
I've never even had a girlfriend because I'm a total dick.

thejackal
07-09-2009, 06:13 PM
Lol my girlfriend doesn't like tennis, she still comes to my high school matches and supports me and she's been to a tournament. She refuses to play though. Oh well maybe someday.

that's the best IMO. someone to support you but that you don't have to baby around on the court. I would rather not date a girl who plays tennis, especially a beginner, for that reason.

gocard
07-09-2009, 07:38 PM
that's the best IMO. someone to support you but that you don't have to baby around on the court. I would rather not date a girl who plays tennis, especially a beginner, for that reason.

Problem is, often guys don't like it when the girl can play better than them (speaking from experience although I am certainly nowhere that good). However, I'd say that I agree in a way with you - I'd rather not date a guy who is a complete beginner because I prefer hard hitting rallies and would feel bad about doing that to beginners :) I don't mind if the guy is better than me; if he wants to go hit with others afterwards I can go find other people to hit with as well.

BOShappyplayer
07-09-2009, 08:01 PM
Very interesting topic. I'm not a frequent poster, but I just wanted to share some thoughts (mostly anecdotal) on the topic.

I'm 27 and currently single. I'm athletic and I love tennis. I was on the JV team in hs (though it was more of a way to keep active since my main sport was swimming then). I didn't re-discover my passion for tennis until last year when I started taking clinics to brush up on the skills/games. My instructor said I'm a low intermediate (2.5-3.0). I practiced at least once or twice (sometimes more) every week for a good portion of last year.

Here's my experience:

- The folks at the club were mostly in the 30-40's range. There were a few women (maybe 2-3?) around my age that I played with that were pretty decent players. They were not single, but they were around my age! It turned out that their bfs were former tennis players. What I found odd was that they both mentioned to me (in passing) that their bf didn't want to practice with them (less fun/competitive due to the level discrepancy).

- Truthfully, among all my girlfriends, I don't know anyone who is passionate about tennis. They play recreational tennis (once every few months, if even), but not in the sense that they practice frequently or join leagues.

- I met a guy around my age at the clinic who tried to pick me up. He called to practice but then he spent more time trying to "talk" off-the-court instead of playing on the courts. He later called asking to "hang out". He's a nice guy, but honestly, I want to play when I'm on the court. It's sort of analogous to those people who disliked getting hit on when they're in the gym: they go there for a purpose - to work out. They really don't want to get hit on when they're sweating and trying to burn off calories.

So my advice?

I think it would be easier to find a single girl and introduce her to tennis (or if you're lucky, she happens to like the sport already.)

Good luck!

beernutz
07-09-2009, 08:08 PM
Very interesting topic. I'm not a frequent poster, but I just wanted to share some thoughts (mostly anecdotal) on the topic.

I'm 27 and currently single. I'm athletic and I love tennis. I was on the JV team in hs (though it was more of a way to keep active since my main sport was swimming then). I didn't re-discover my passion for tennis until last year when I started taking clinics to brush up on the skills/games. My instructor said I'm a low intermediate (2.5-3.0). I practiced at least once or twice (sometimes more) every week for a good portion of last year.

Here's my experience:

- The folks at the club were mostly in the 30-40's range. There were a few women (maybe 2-3?) around my age that I played with that were pretty decent players. They were not single, but they were around my age! It turned out that their bfs were former tennis players. What I found odd was that they both mentioned to me (in passing) that their bf didn't want to practice with them (less fun/competitive due to the level discrepancy).

- Truthfully, among all my girlfriends, I don't know anyone who is passionate about tennis. They play recreational tennis (once every few months, if even), but not in the sense that they practice frequently or join leagues.

- I met a guy around my age at the clinic who tried to pick me up. He called to practice but then he spent more time trying to "talk" off-the-court instead of playing on the courts. He later called asking to "hang out". He's a nice guy, but honestly, I want to play when I'm on the court. It's sort of analogous to those people who disliked getting hit on when they're in the gym: they go there for a purpose - to work out. They really don't want to get hit on when they're sweating and trying to burn off calories.

So my advice?

I think it would be easier to find a single girl and introduce her to tennis (or if you're lucky, she happens to like the sport already.)

Good luck!

Marry me?

Oh wait, I'm already married. JUST KIDDING HONEY, SHE MEANS NOTHING TO ME I SWEAR!

Anyway, I got lucky because my wife loves to play too and will hit with me when I can't find a partner. Plus she was actually not ticked off when I told her I bought a Prince Neos! Who could want more than that in a woman?

princess bossass
07-09-2009, 09:38 PM
I've never even had a girlfriend because I'm a total dick.

Ahahaha! I can't decide which would be funnier--this being true and you just being straight up about it, or this being bee ess.

Grover Sparkman
07-10-2009, 04:10 AM
Ahahaha! I can't decide which would be funnier--this being true and you just being straight up about it, or this being bee ess.

It has to be BS. He's posting on an internet forum, everyone knows that those of us males who post on internet forums have crippling social phobia.

zapvor
07-11-2009, 01:51 PM
lol this thread is hilarious.

in my experience i met this ridiculous girl by the courts, and she needed help finding a particular match. she rejected me in a very nice way though.

zapvor
07-11-2009, 01:51 PM
oh and 99% of the girls i hit with...never hit with me again lol

David_Is_Right
07-12-2009, 12:32 AM
I think most women want a guy who is "going places," meaning has some drive and ambition in their field and can hold down a job/career.

Pretty much every long-term girlfriend I've had seems to have wanted the exact opposite. Any ambition or drive has been quickly stifled if it requires any spending any time or effort outside the hours of 9 and 5.

But anyway, gentlemen, there ARE women out there who are unattached AND play tennis -- some even with great enthusiasm, such as myself (though I'm not a 4.0). I love the sport passionately, and if my BF did too, I'd do my best to keep up with him, and if our match-up was unsatisfying to him I'd be more than willing to go to the courts with him and hit around with another partner while he hit with someone else. I can't imagine any other women really into tennis would feel any differently. My ex (far my tennis superior) and I hit together all the time, though he also had other hitting partners more his level whom he really enjoyed playing. He was always helpful and encouraging to me, which I really appreciated, even when I was being the occasional drag.

This is really good to hear!

David_Is_Right
07-12-2009, 12:35 AM
Problem is, often guys don't like it when the girl can play better than them (speaking from experience although I am certainly nowhere that good).

I'm sure this happens a lot. However, I find talent really attractive in girls; being really good at something is attractive. I'm sure I'm not alone in this.

gameboy
07-12-2009, 12:54 PM
Some of the comments by the female posters remind me of this skit from SNL...

http://vodpod.com/watch/1265922-vsocial-sexual-harassment-and-you-tom-brady-skit

Steady Eddy
07-12-2009, 01:03 PM
when I was single i made a big mistake. I met a young woman at a tennis social, and we got together for drinks one night and had a nice time. Then we got together to play tennis. Well, I thought I needed to impress her with my tennis skills, so I proceeded to beat her 6-0. She wouldn't return my calls after that. So, the moral of the story, let her take a few games off of you.Didn't anything go off in your head when the score went to 5-0? In social tennis I try to avoid the bagel. (In a tournament, no way). You don't want to embarrass someone, and a bagel is kind of rude. Especially on a date!

grimmbomb21
07-12-2009, 05:19 PM
Anyway, I got lucky because my wife loves to play too and will hit with me when I can't find a partner. Plus she was actually not ticked off when I told her I bought a Prince Neos! Who could want more than that in a woman?

My wife hates tennis. Hates when I play, watch it on TV, or when I'm online talking about it with others. We went to a tournament in L.A. last summer, and she is complaining about sitting in the sun while we are watching Safin play. Safin!! WTH is that??

Yeah, she's staying home this year. Or better yet, maybe will have moved out by the time I get back. Cross your fingers for me.8-)

gocard
07-12-2009, 08:27 PM
My wife hates tennis. Hates when I play, watch it on TV, or when I'm online talking about it with others. We went to a tournament in L.A. last summer, and she is complaining about sitting in the sun while we are watching Safin play. Safin!! WTH is that??

Yeah, she's staying home this year. Or better yet, maybe will have moved out by the time I get back. Cross your fingers for me.8-)

Haha I'd love it if my boyfriend loved tennis as much as I do! If it's on TV I'll try to readjust my schedule just so that I can watch it, otherwise I'll have to record it. And man... I WISH I got to see Safin play live back when he was in his prime! I did see the two Andy's duking it out though, that was pretty neat. This is an amusing thread :)

brado32003
07-12-2009, 09:01 PM
Speaking of creepy . . .

This morning, I went for a run with my dog. I like to run in a nearby neighborhood of gorgeous mansions.

I was going along, and this (white -- you will see the significance of his race later) guy drove up and asked where a certain street was. He was headed the opposite direction I had been going, so he spoke to me through his passenger's window. No biggie. I told him to keep going straight and he'd run into it.

And that is where the conversation should have ended.

Instead, he says something along these lines:

"This is a beautiful neighborhood, isn't it? I just love these old houses. The people who live here are really rich. I went to high school right over there, actually. I loved it, but then we moved to Springfield, Massachusettes. It's not nearly as nice. You know the biggest problem they have there? The police."

By this point, I had taken note of the fact that there was no one else around. Not good. He continued thusly:

"Yeah, the police there really give you a hard time. Especially if you are black, you know?"

He continued on, leaving me to wonder what his interactions were with the police that would cause him to form an opinion about how the police in that city are treating blacks. Most white guys I know wouldn't follow racial profiling or brutality cases closely enough to opine about it to a woman on the street. I picked up my dog's poop and wondered whether it would make a better weapon if I threw it or smeared it on myself.

He had continued talking, and I picked up the conversation:

"Yeah, my mom is 85 now, although she looks 65. She's in really good shape. I'd really like to move her back down here . . . "

At this point I decided to make a break for it, yelled "Good luck!" and continued running in the opposite direction he was driving.

Maybe he was a friendly guy looking for some conversation.

Or maybe he was Ted Bundy's kid brother. I didn't care to find out.

That was me... Nice dog by the way

zapvor
07-13-2009, 03:27 AM
That was me... Nice dog by the way

LOL this thread is one of the best on TT

mlktennis
07-13-2009, 08:08 AM
Hi, you play tennis pretty well. ( smiling and as non creepy as possible) I love playing and always looking for new people to hit around with. (twirling tennis racquet) I come to these courts often. If you ever want someone to hit aound with, give me a call. (proceed to give digit's). Ok, bye. I then go back to playing or walk away confidently.

Ladies, what you think? ;)

princess bossass
07-13-2009, 08:56 AM
Hi, you play tennis pretty well. ( smiling and as non creepy as possible) I love playing and always looking for new people to hit around with. (twirling tennis racquet) I come to these courts often. If you ever want someone to hit aound with, give me a call. (proceed to give digit's). Ok, bye. I then go back to playing or walk away confidently.

Ladies, what you think? ;)

Does the winky face mean you don't really want to know? I've lost my ability to detect internets sarcasms!

Just in case you're in earnest: personally, for me, a kind, frank, and humorous "Wow, great serves! But you want to know what might help you with that janky forehand?" would be a more effective opening line--because a) sh!+ kittens, my forehand has gone all janky! and b) I'm not a fan of open flattery from strangers. And a free forehand lesson would def. make the invitation more appealing :)

But speaking more generally, I think this would only work on a girl who IS very good and close to your level--otherwise she's gonna know you don't JUST want to hit with her, and might think the way you've put your invite is tad manipulative. OR she might get the drift and just not care that you're being a little roundabout. Depends on her.

And it's not something that's ever happened to me at the courts before, so being approached this way would be both a) strange, indeed, but also b) a very interesting and possibly exciting development, IF you immediately struck me as a person I could see myself interested in.

But for the record, no woman on planet Earth is going to believe you really just are looking for a hitting partner.

thejackal
07-13-2009, 09:28 AM
Does the winky face mean you don't really want to know? I've lost my ability to detect internets sarcasms!

Just in case you're in earnest: personally, for me, a kind, frank, and humorous "Wow, great serves! But you want to know what might help you with that janky forehand?" would be a more effective opening line--because a) sh!+ kittens, my forehand has gone all janky! and b) I'm not a fan of open flattery from strangers. And a free forehand lesson would def. make the invitation more appealing :)

But speaking more generally, I think this would only work on a girl who IS very good and close to your level--otherwise she's gonna know you don't JUST want to hit with her, and might think the way you've put your invite is tad manipulative. OR she might get the drift and just not care that you're being a little roundabout. Depends on her.

And it's not something that's ever happened to me at the courts before, so being approached this way would be both a) strange, indeed, but also b) a very interesting and possibly exciting development, IF you immediately struck me as a person I could see myself interested in.

But for the record, no woman on planet Earth is going to believe you really just are looking for a hitting partner.

Im not a girl, but ya, what she said. Maybe it's just me, but that would be a bit sketchy coming from a person of either gender.

grimmbomb21
07-13-2009, 07:32 PM
Haha I'd love it if my boyfriend loved tennis as much as I do! If it's on TV I'll try to readjust my schedule just so that I can watch it, otherwise I'll have to record it. And man... I WISH I got to see Safin play live back when he was in his prime! I did see the two Andy's duking it out though, that was pretty neat. This is an amusing thread :)

Dump him. He doesn't see the light.

And that goes for the rest of you with a not so better half that is not interested in tennis. Drop. Kick. Wish them well.

:grin:

Grover Sparkman
07-14-2009, 04:37 AM
Hi, you play tennis pretty well. ( smiling and as non creepy as possible) I love playing and always looking for new people to hit around with. (twirling tennis racquet) I come to these courts often. If you ever want someone to hit aound with, give me a call. (proceed to give digit's). Ok, bye. I then go back to playing or walk away confidently.

Ladies, what you think? ;)

If you're the one giving the girl your number, she isn't gonna call.

Does the winky face mean you don't really want to know? I've lost my ability to detect internets sarcasms!

Just in case you're in earnest: personally, for me, a kind, frank, and humorous "Wow, great serves! But you want to know what might help you with that janky forehand?" would be a more effective opening line--because a) sh!+ kittens, my forehand has gone all janky! and b) I'm not a fan of open flattery from strangers. And a free forehand lesson would def. make the invitation more appealing :)

But speaking more generally, I think this would only work on a girl who IS very good and close to your level--otherwise she's gonna know you don't JUST want to hit with her, and might think the way you've put your invite is tad manipulative. OR she might get the drift and just not care that you're being a little roundabout. Depends on her.

And it's not something that's ever happened to me at the courts before, so being approached this way would be both a) strange, indeed, but also b) a very interesting and possibly exciting development, IF you immediately struck me as a person I could see myself interested in.

But for the record, no woman on planet Earth is going to believe you really just are looking for a hitting partner.

A.) Janky? I just learned a new word

B.) You have to make it as non-chalant as possible. As she said, no one is ever going to believe you're just looking for a hitting partner, and you'll appear desperate.

It's not a door you can barge open, it's one you have to open slowly. Immediately saying "hey, nice serve. I'm looking for a hitting partner here is my number call me" just makes you seem creepy and lecherous.

goober
07-14-2009, 06:16 AM
I joined Tennisopolis several months ago. Every time a moderately cute girl posts she is looking for hitting partners- a whole slew of guys reply lol.


IMO although it would be nice to have a tennis playing partner that you are compatible with in all other respects, I think most married guys I know would be just happy if their wife tolerated or allowed you to play tennis regularly:)

snowpuppy
07-14-2009, 06:46 AM
I am surprise nobody mentioned starting or participating in mixed double league play. When my friends first try to start team play in USTA mixed doubles was the only league still open to registration. None of us really know much girls that played. The league coordinator set us up with a few and one happen to have played in women's league that eventually dragged along her teammates.

What help us gel as a team was we were almost all about the same age range (young), enthusiastic about tennis, and organized about practices (and after practice/match hang outs :) ). Some of us are single, some not, and none of us hit on any of our fellow teammates but of course this scenario can be different for you guys. I think this is a more comfortable way as oppose to just hitting on strangers on the court and gives you a chance to be friends with more girls at the least.

mlktennis
07-14-2009, 09:24 AM
Seems unanimous, no call back for tennis. Oh well, back to hitting on the wall- pun intended :)

Power Player
07-14-2009, 12:08 PM
Why would you give a girl your number? You have to get hers. And even when you get a girl's #, it's no guarantee you will ever go out. I would say on a weekend, I will get 2-5 #s if I am out 2 nights and maybe end up going out with 1 or 2. It really is a number's game.

One thing that works is to tell girls you play tennis when you meet them at a bar. A lot of times they will show they are interested by saying that they want to learn the game. If you have the patience to do it, it's a fun date. That being said, I would love to meet more girls that are great players and love to hit (and already know how). That's more of a challenge.

jorel
07-14-2009, 12:15 PM
i tell them my number and they pretend to put it into their phones

thejackal
07-14-2009, 12:44 PM
I am surprise nobody mentioned starting or participating in mixed double league play. When my friends first try to start team play in USTA mixed doubles was the only league still open to registration. None of us really know much girls that played. The league coordinator set us up with a few and one happen to have played in women's league that eventually dragged along her teammates.

What help us gel as a team was we were almost all about the same age range (young), enthusiastic about tennis, and organized about practices (and after practice/match hang outs :) ). Some of us are single, some not, and none of us hit on any of our fellow teammates but of course this scenario can be different for you guys. I think this is a more comfortable way as oppose to just hitting on strangers on the court and gives you a chance to be friends with more girls at the least.

great idea, surprised no one's brought it up yet.

and a general thought: if a girl will not give u her number, giving her yours is pretty useless - she won't call you anyway.

princess bossass
07-14-2009, 04:02 PM
great idea, surprised no one's brought it up yet.

and a general thought: if a girl will not give u her number, giving her yours is pretty useless - she won't call you anyway.

I'm gonna have to disagree. If you ask for her number and she refuses, that's one thing. But if she just doesn't offer hers up, that doesn't mean you can't offer yours. I have actually been given numbers by guys and actually ended up calling them--granted, to both of our surprise, but still. It happens.

Maybe it's that I'm 30, maybe it's that I've gotten bolder somehow, but I'm kind of done with *****footing around--and I'd like to think that more women feel that way than are willing to admit it, because we think if we don't make a man chase us, we lose our allure. Well allure can go blow it. If you want me to call you, give me your number. If you don't, don't. If I want to call you I will, and if I won't I won't. If I accept your number and don't call, no offense. It just means a) I changed my mind, or b) I was accepting your number so as not to be rude, but don't want to call.

Topaz
07-14-2009, 04:09 PM
I'm gonna have to disagree. If you ask for her number and she refuses, that's one thing. But if she just doesn't offer hers up, that doesn't mean you can't offer yours. I have actually been given numbers by guys and actually ended up calling them--granted, to both of our surprise, but still. It happens.

Maybe it's that I'm 30, maybe it's that I've gotten bolder somehow, but I'm kind of done with *****footing around--and I'd like to think that more women feel that way than are willing to admit it, because we think if we don't make a man chase us, we lose our allure. Well allure can go blow it. If you want me to call you, give me your number. If you don't, don't. If I want to call you I will, and if I won't I won't. If I accept your number and don't call, no offense. It just means a) I changed my mind, or b) I was accepting your number so as not to be rude, but don't want to call.

Quoted for truth...couldn't have said it better myself.

The 'tolerance' level for BS definitely goes down as age goes up! :shock: ;)

thejackal
07-14-2009, 04:16 PM
Im 20 and Im not big on cougars, so my bad. haha

mlktennis
07-14-2009, 04:27 PM
Ahhh, to be young and full of energy and opportunity to play all the games of courtship.

princess bossass
07-14-2009, 06:00 PM
Im 20 and Im not big on cougars, so my bad. haha

Sweet child, cougars are women of advancing age who prey on young pups like yourself. Not 30 year-olds dating in their own age bracket who know what they want and what they don't.

mlktennis
07-14-2009, 06:35 PM
Why would you give a girl your number? You have to get hers. And even when you get a girl's #, it's no guarantee you will ever go out. I would say on a weekend, I will get 2-5 #s if I am out 2 nights and maybe end up going out with 1 or 2. It really is a number's game.

One thing that works is to tell girls you play tennis when you meet them at a bar. A lot of times they will show they are interested by saying that they want to learn the game. If you have the patience to do it, it's a fun date. That being said, I would love to meet more girls that are great players and love to hit (and already know how). That's more of a challenge.

I mention I play tennis to alot of people, I just get blank looks- it's funny, like they don't know what to say. Not a machismo sport I guess. No prob, I'm comfortable with myself...yeah...i'm comfortable...uhh,yeah...i'm ok.

JoshDragon
07-14-2009, 06:53 PM
Im 20 and Im not big on cougars, so my bad. haha

Same for me except I'm 19.

I would never mix tennis and dating anyway.

Power Player
07-15-2009, 05:29 AM
Im 20 and Im not big on cougars, so my bad. haha

30 year old girls aren't cougars young jedi.

LetFirstServe
07-15-2009, 06:48 AM
30 year old girls aren't cougars young jedi.

hahaha I called 30s pumas since at 20 anything 10 years older than me had to be something. I got into my puma stage when I was 22.

zapvor
07-15-2009, 07:21 AM
I'm gonna have to disagree. If you ask for her number and she refuses, that's one thing. But if she just doesn't offer hers up, that doesn't mean you can't offer yours. I have actually been given numbers by guys and actually ended up calling them--granted, to both of our surprise, but still. It happens.

Maybe it's that I'm 30, maybe it's that I've gotten bolder somehow, but I'm kind of done with *****footing around--and I'd like to think that more women feel that way than are willing to admit it, because we think if we don't make a man chase us, we lose our allure. Well allure can go blow it. If you want me to call you, give me your number. If you don't, don't. If I want to call you I will, and if I won't I won't. If I accept your number and don't call, no offense. It just means a) I changed my mind, or b) I was accepting your number so as not to be rude, but don't want to call.

i dont know...i think giving her your number goes nowhere. shes not going to call. shes just being nice and polite.

mlktennis
07-15-2009, 07:40 AM
what do you call old men that 'prey' on younger women?

Rich! ok, animal kingdon wise?

onehandbh
07-15-2009, 08:06 AM
^^^ if they're a bit too young, then "criminals." or in some cases, "fathers."
(e.g. Mr. Allen and Mr. Freeman)

goober
07-15-2009, 08:41 AM
what do you call old men that 'prey' on younger women?

Rich! ok, animal kingdon wise?

Cradle robber

Sugar daddy

In the animal kingdom the opposite of a cougar is a Rhino according to urban dictionary:

An older man on the prowl for a younger woman and by definition, the gender opposite of the cougar. The rhino derives his name from his appearance because the specimen is more often than not both horny AND ugly. The rhino is usually found in warmer locales and can be spotted wearing either a flowered or pastel shirt (with 3 buttons opened to expose a mature mane of chest hair) tucked into khaki shorts and sporting boat shoes. Also look for horrendous dance moves, a white man's overbite, male pattern baldness and a penchant for picking up the bar tab. I have never heard this term used though.

princess bossass
07-15-2009, 08:46 AM
i dont know...i think giving her your number goes nowhere. shes not going to call. shes just being nice and polite.

I see your point, but can't you imagine a nice, polite girl also being kind of shy? I might think it's too bold to offer you my number, but might like getting yours. And my nerve might improve when I'm home, though I was kind of deer-in-headlights at the moment--and then I might call you.

But, right, a lot of the time, a girl probably would accept your number just to be polite.

Admittedly, like I've said, it would be strange to be approached by a guy on the tennis courts. But if it just so happened that I were particularly drawn to this individual and liked the interaction, it would be a fun experiment to--what the hell!--actually call him. Then again, I let first impressions really carry me, maybe more than most people, or more than I should.

what do you call old men that 'prey' on younger women?

Rich! ok, animal kingdon wise?

LOLz! Hmmm... men?

gameboy
07-15-2009, 08:54 AM
A simple fact of life is, if you are a woman under 30, you can play hard to get and it is going to work out fine. If you are woman over 30, you need to be more aggressive as your dating pool shrinks rapidly.

Men are simple, they always go after younger females under 30, even if the guy is over 30 or even over 40. I am not saying that that is fair or right, but it is what it is. We are simple beasts.

So, if the woman is under 30 and you give them your phone number, the chances of you getting a call back is between slim and none and slim already left the bar.

If the woman is over 30, you actually have an ok shot that you may get a call back.

If you are a man really looking for a solid relationship (okay that may be an oxymoron), it actually pays to date "older" women.

cak
07-15-2009, 09:01 AM
I'm back in the dating world at an age where the "cougar" term may well apply if I were actually of the mind to go after the young guys. And the way dating seems to go at this age, the men give their numbers to the women, and the women call if they are interested. To women my age it feels safer.

zapvor
07-15-2009, 10:14 AM
I see your point, but can't you imagine a nice, polite girl also being kind of shy? I might think it's too bold to offer you my number, but might like getting yours. And my nerve might improve when I'm home, though I was kind of deer-in-headlights at the moment--and then I might call you.

But, right, a lot of the time, a girl probably would accept your number just to be polite.

Admittedly, like I've said, it would be strange to be approached by a guy on the tennis courts. But if it just so happened that I were particularly drawn to this individual and liked the interaction, it would be a fun experiment to--what the hell!--actually call him. Then again, I let first impressions really carry me, maybe more than most people, or more than I should.



LOLz! Hmmm... men?

right. but allow me to clarify. like you may be too shy to offer it, but if we ask you and you dont give it to us, then its no point to give it to you. it only works if like you are like really receptive. i mean i like to think i can tell if you are just shy, so. i dont have an issue with hitting on a girl on the court though. i dont see why not. but it sounds you girls are more opposed to the idea

zapvor
07-15-2009, 10:23 AM
I'm back in the dating world at an age where the "cougar" term may well apply if I were actually of the mind to go after the young guys. And the way dating seems to go at this age, the men give their numbers to the women, and the women call if they are interested. To women my age it feels safer.

so how does this work? do i want to know. no wonder i like tennis better :D

princess bossass
07-15-2009, 10:41 AM
A simple fact of life is, if you are a woman under 30, you can play hard to get and it is going to work out fine. If you are woman over 30, you need to be more aggressive as your dating pool shrinks rapidly.

Men are simple, they always go after younger females under 30, even if the guy is over 30 or even over 40. I am not saying that that is fair or right, but it is what it is. We are simple beasts.

So, if the woman is under 30 and you give them your phone number, the chances of you getting a call back is between slim and none and slim already left the bar.

If the woman is over 30, you actually have an ok shot that you may get a call back.

I'd say this is all generally true, with one exception: most men assume that women over 30, who are bold and direct, are looking for a husband. There are women in the world who are 30, live full lives, and just want to date you, maybe know you, take you home, etc.

If you are a man really looking for a solid relationship (okay that may be an oxymoron), it actually pays to date "older" women.

Ahahaha! A friend and I have a saying for this. When we're being pursued by a younger guy (<26, say), and we're kinda like "Why's he so into this?", we say, "Meehh, he just wants to play house."

I'm back in the dating world at an age where the "cougar" term may well apply if I were actually of the mind to go after the young guys. And the way dating seems to go at this age, the men give their numbers to the women, and the women call if they are interested. To women my age it feels safer.

Bingo. I don't like giving my number out. Too many stalkers, and women cut into little pieces.

right. but allow me to clarify. like you may be too shy to offer it, but if we ask you and you dont give it to us, then its no point to give it to you. it only works if like you are like really receptive. i mean i like to think i can tell if you are just shy, so. i dont have an issue with hitting on a girl on the court though. i dont see why not. but it sounds you girls are more opposed to the idea

Right, right, exactly, if you ask for her number and she turns you down, absolutely just leave her alone. That's why I think it might be a better move just to offer yours rather than ask for hers in the first place. Doing so leaves the ball in her court, she doesn't have to make a decision about you on the spot, and it's totally non-threatening.

Getting hit on on the court is one thing. The original proposed situation, "Want to hit sometime?" is another, because it's kind of phony-sounding.

All of this = with a grain of salt, of course, as I have no clue how old you are, and I can't speak for the ~18 year-olds or ~40 year-olds of the world. ;)

Topaz
07-15-2009, 11:30 AM
I'd say this is all generally true, with one exception: most men assume that women over 30, who are bold and direct, are looking for a husband. There are women in the world who are 30, live full lives, and just want to date you, maybe know you, take you home, etc.


Quoted for truth, once again.

Though, I have also found that many of the guys in my age range (early to mid 30s) are also h*ll-bent on getting married and having kids *rightnow*...and that sends me running totally in the other direction.

gameboy
07-15-2009, 12:39 PM
Hmmm... I don't think you are quite getting what I am saying.

Guys are genetically programmed to seek out females who are most fertile - that means low to mid 20's. That is what ALL guys are attracted to (no matter how old you are).

Of course, this is a very general statement and this may not be true for some men, but it is built in our genetics, and we men pretty much go with the flow.

So, when some men go after older women, that is pretty much because those guys see their chances improving with older women, and not necessarily because they are looking for something more permanent. Yes, there are those guys looking for that, but my guess is that is more like 10%.

Consequently, if we see a women over 30 who are bold and direct, we really don't care if you are looking for a husband or not. We just calculate in our head if you are our best option. It is fine that you want to live full lives and etc. But we really don't care about that. If you just want to date us and take us home that is even better.

Oops, am I spilling too much of the ManCode?

MomentumGT
07-15-2009, 12:56 PM
Maybe it's that I'm 30, maybe it's that I've gotten bolder somehow, but I'm kind of done with *****footing around--and I'd like to think that more women feel that way than are willing to admit it, because we think if we don't make a man chase us, we lose our allure. Well allure can go blow it. If you want me to call you, give me your number. If you don't, don't. If I want to call you I will, and if I won't I won't.

There are women in the world who are 30, live full lives, and just want to date you, maybe know you, take you home, etc.



So. . .can I give you my number? ;-) LOL.



Oops, am I spilling too much of the ManCode?

Yes. . .yes you are. lol.

-Jon

conditionZero
07-15-2009, 01:38 PM
Though, I have also found that many of the guys in my age range (early to mid 30s) are also h*ll-bent on getting married and having kids *rightnow*...and that sends me running totally in the other direction.

Run, run like the wind and don't look back.

zapvor
07-16-2009, 07:36 AM
I'd say



Right, right, exactly, if you ask for her number and she turns you down, absolutely just leave her alone. That's why I think it might be a better move just to offer yours rather than ask for hers in the first place. Doing so leaves the ball in her court, she doesn't have to make a decision about you on the spot, and it's totally non-threatening.

Getting hit on on the court is one thing. The original proposed situation, "Want to hit sometime?" is another, because it's kind of phony-sounding.

All of this = with a grain of salt, of course, as I have no clue how old you are, and I can't speak for the ~18 year-olds or ~40 year-olds of the world. ;)

i am 20something...i am sincere when i ask someone if they want to hit soemtime, but why do girls always speculate that into i want them? soemtimes when i am just chatting someone up becuse i am wiating for a train or something i get the vibe they think i am trying to go further when really i am just having fun with it you know. i guess next time i will try offering my number...

what i really want to know is, whatys the secret to get her to give you her number? :P

princess bossass
07-16-2009, 08:23 AM
Quoted for truth, once again.

Though, I have also found that many of the guys in my age range (early to mid 30s) are also h*ll-bent on getting married and having kids *rightnow*...and that sends me running totally in the other direction.

Amen. Though I'm currently dating a 35 yo who gets a rash whenever he hears a word even phonetically similar to "commitment," hehehe. Which is fine by me for the time being!



Oops, am I spilling too much of the ManCode?

Hehehe. That sounds borderline pornographic.


So. . .can I give you my number? ;-) LOL.



Nice work! Hehehe.

cak
07-16-2009, 08:26 AM
One of the things I found really cool dating in your late 40s is neither the women nor the men are looking for fertile partners, nor someone to support them. They've been there, done that, and are looking for dates with independent children that don't get in the way of scheduling activities. It's much easier to find partners that share your interests, since the "want kids, make money" portion is out of the equation. So yep, found a guy that plays tennis.

princess bossass
07-16-2009, 08:27 AM
i am 20something...i am sincere when i ask someone if they want to hit soemtime, but why do girls always speculate that into i want them? soemtimes when i am just chatting someone up becuse i am wiating for a train or something i get the vibe they think i am trying to go further when really i am just having fun with it you know. i guess next time i will try offering my number...

what i really want to know is, whatys the secret to get her to give you her number? :P

Zap, women do get hit on pretty much everywhere. Sometimes it's annoying, or embarrassing, or just plain boring. So if women respond to you like that on occasion, even when you're just shooting the breeze, they're probably just responding to life in general--their previous heaps of experiences with men--and it's not personal.

The secret isn't a way to approach a woman, really. It's either she's attracted to/interested in/drawn to you, or she' not. Women are like men that way. Yes, a person can grow on you, but when it comes to just getting someone's number, the first impression is it.

That's really it. All these strategies I kind of think are moot. If I get a vibe off you I like, I might give you my number, or accept yours and actually call you. If I don't, I won't.

zapvor
07-16-2009, 09:38 AM
thanks for the response. so basically, first impression is everything. thats probably why then. i usually am too laid back, and they think i am a slob or something. i wish most would realize that book cover judging isnt everything.

zapvor
07-16-2009, 09:40 AM
i cant believe i am seeking dating advice on a tennis board. haha. this is a great thread though

Power Player
07-16-2009, 11:56 AM
If I ask for a girl's number and she does not give it to me, I am not going to give her mine. I'm moving on to better things.

You have to have some confidence and go after a girl that is ready to hang out.

chinadoll724
07-16-2009, 01:47 PM
Hi, you play tennis pretty well. ( smiling and as non creepy as possible) I love playing and always looking for new people to hit around with. (twirling tennis racquet) I come to these courts often. If you ever want someone to hit aound with, give me a call. (proceed to give digit's). Ok, bye. I then go back to playing or walk away confidently.

Ladies, what you think? ;)

:) if you're twirling your racquet at me, I think that would set off my radar. That said, I love hitting with guys.

goober
07-16-2009, 03:37 PM
BTW there are tennis clubs for single people out there. My city has one so I imagine other metro areas do as well. This particular one has a requirement that you are 3.5 and above. They have mixed dubs round robin followed by a party or social event afterward. The club has been going for 20 years so they must be doing something right.

Rob_C
07-18-2009, 08:15 PM
Me I don't Do either.. I'm No Megan fox.. but I'm no ugly Ducking either.. But I Never Ever Don't approch guys...(The guys want Me To approch Them, I want A guy To approch me..= It's a stand Off:twisted:) What Do you Do With A standoff??? ;)

One, or both, or you needs to get liquored up a bit. That sometimes helps.

zapvor
07-19-2009, 03:28 PM
whats wrong with twirling your racket??

mlktennis
07-19-2009, 04:09 PM
yeah, what's wrong with twirling your racket? talkin' and twirlin', talkin' and twirlin'.

Ladies is it like a man messin' with his hair too much while talkin' at the bar? I hate that!

ubermeyer
07-19-2009, 05:58 PM
ask out sharapova

lol jk

Power Player
07-20-2009, 05:10 AM
This weekend me and my buddy got a tennis double date because I met a girl at a nightclub and it ends up she was looking for a tennis partner. So I stand by the fact that it is a nice thing to throw into a conversation nonchalantley.

zapvor
07-20-2009, 09:36 AM
i think my issues is i need to tone it down lol

thejackal
07-20-2009, 12:37 PM
yeah, what's wrong with twirling your racket? talkin' and twirlin', talkin' and twirlin'.

Ladies is it like a man messin' with his hair too much while talkin' at the bar? I hate that!


In general it makes you look "tweaky" and not in control of yourself. when I was little I had this horrible habit of blinking a lot and really fast when talking to girls (needing glasses, which I didnt have yet, didnt help). It sounds really corny, but look at James Bond's body language - he moves slowly and deliberately.

precision2b
07-21-2009, 10:39 AM
OP,

Even Wayne Newton says love comes when you least expect it in Vegas. Seriously, cart before the horse is running rampant in your mind. You should try to hook up on a personal/intellectual level and then see what happens. A little humility goes a long way.

OH MY GOD!!! That’s a scary thought. A female just like him!!!!!!!!!!!!! :shock:

precision2b
07-21-2009, 11:04 AM
There are more than just one creepy guy in every park/club.

My typical pickup lines are: I try to use them all in the first five minutes to meeting any woman.

Today is not such a good day, I lost X millions on the stock market. I don't care about myself but my four charities are fund by the stocks I gave them, so I feel for the kids, senior, sick, and mentally ********.

I guess I just have to take another X millions from my personal porfolio to make up the difference.


Ouch my back is acting up. Ever since I made a night time HALO (High Attitude Low Opening) jump into Afghanistan during a winter storm to save an orphanage and strained my back, it acts up at the most inopportune time. Like last week, when I ran into a burning building to save this family.

I feel so embarassed that I have to wear custom made shorts because as a 6'6" male with a 32 inch waist, I can only wear small/medium sized shorts, but even the baggy ones are a little tight in the manhood area. The boys are squeezed even when I'm in my ice soak so I have to have my shorts tailored. No, I'm not wearing a cod piece, that's just me in my "restful" state.

Can you tell which Ferrari in the parking lot is mine? Did I take the Black, or the Grey one. Wait, I think I took the red one. I have so many, it is so, so difficult to keep track.

LOL!!! Best laugh I have had all day!!!

topher.juan
07-21-2009, 07:18 PM
Me I don't Do either.. I'm No Megan fox.. but I'm no ugly Ducking either.. But I Never Ever Don't approch guys...

Never ever don't... so you always do? Nice, because most girls don't, they feel empowered standing back while guy after guy approaches them as they say no, no, no, no, no.

princess bossass
07-23-2009, 01:29 PM
thanks for the response. so basically, first impression is everything. thats probably why then. i usually am too laid back, and they think i am a slob or something. i wish most would realize that book cover judging isnt everything.

Yeah. But my idea of first impression has a lot to do with the quality of the conversation, how a man expresses himself, wit, comfort, eye contact, etc. It's not JUST looks. Though that's part of it.

i cant believe i am seeking dating advice on a tennis board. haha. this is a great thread though

I agree, it's fun. I feel like such a wise old soul, hehehe. Giving out dating advice to all the 20-somethings. Somebody just shoot me, please! :wink:

dennis10is
07-23-2009, 01:40 PM
This weekend me and my buddy got a tennis double date because I met a girl at a nightclub and it ends up she was looking for a tennis partner. So I stand by the fact that it is a nice thing to throw into a conversation nonchalantley.

Agreed, I try to casually mention that I'm tennis player with a solid 3.5 NTRP rating. That's enough for them to give their number and panties.

Chicks dig it when they hear 3.5. I see their pupils go huge, goosebumps all over, the twins are on high alert.

If I dare tell them that I can get wicked topspin with my STRONG continental grip and I can COME over the top on my 1bh and they pretty much drag me into the men's room and have their way with me.

cak
07-23-2009, 01:44 PM
Yeah. But my idea of first impression has a lot to do with the quality of the conversation, how a man expresses himself, wit, comfort, eye contact, etc. It's not JUST looks. Though that's part of it.

I am a huge hockey fan. My sweetie is not. On our first date we were sitting in a pub. The glass divider behind his head was reflecting the bar tv where my favorite hockey team was in a close battle with their arch enemies. Super model looks wouldn't have held my attention. He had to be amazingly witty and interesting to keep my mind on him. And he was. He had no idea how high that bar was that night.

goober
07-23-2009, 02:52 PM
Agreed, I try to casually mention that I'm tennis player with a solid 3.5 NTRP rating. That's enough for them to give their number and panties.

Chicks dig it when they hear 3.5. I see their pupils go huge, goosebumps all over, the twins are on high alert.

If I dare tell them that I can get wicked topspin with my STRONG continental grip and I can COME over the top on my 1bh and they pretty much drag me into the men's room and have their way with me.

If I only knew earlier that women will put out if they know you are a tennis player.

benxten
07-23-2009, 03:10 PM
i actually saw two girls hitting yesterday. not that bad either. saw three girls playing awhile back. its always a turn on when i see a girl playing tennis.

benxten
07-23-2009, 03:13 PM
i do see a lot of older women playing tennis though ask to play with with them maybe theyll bring their daughter or granddaughter with them next time and if ur lucky she might be around ur age.

benxten
07-23-2009, 03:18 PM
hmm now that i think about it if i want to see some pretty attractive girls playing competitive tennis, all i gotta do is go watch the ladies intramural matches at my college. from the names of the teams playing each other, most of them are from sororities.

dennis10is
07-23-2009, 03:34 PM
hmm now that i think about it if i want to see some pretty attractive girls playing competitive tennis, all i gotta do is go watch the ladies intramural matches at my college. from the names of the teams playing each other, most of them are from sororities.

You are most likely referring to the Greek intramural league, if your school makes such a distinction.

I have one better :)

Below is the annual Sorority Beach VBall tourney at my alma mater, UCSB. Yes, I did play volleyball :)


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f88iGnNsjNg&NR=1

dennis10is
07-23-2009, 03:43 PM
If I only knew earlier that women will put out if they know you are a tennis player.

Yes, if I were to walk up to Angelina and tell her that I'm a legit 3.5 tennis player, she would throw Brad and the brats out of the house, pronto.

zapvor
07-24-2009, 05:16 AM
Yeah. But my idea of first impression has a lot to do with the quality of the conversation, how a man expresses himself, wit, comfort, eye contact, etc. It's not JUST looks. Though that's part of it.



I agree, it's fun. I feel like such a wise old soul, hehehe. Giving out dating advice to all the 20-somethings. Somebody just shoot me, please! :wink:

ah...how old are you.

Power Player
07-24-2009, 09:26 AM
If I only knew earlier that women will put out if they know you are a tennis player.

I guess you guys think I just go up to a girl and tell them I play tennis? lol.. Bragging is lame, I would personally never do that. Discussing hobbies is a good idea though.

Girls like dates like tennis,rock climbing gyms..etc. It seperates you from the average guy who wants to get drinks or dinner right off the bat.

MomentumGT
07-24-2009, 12:32 PM
You are most likely referring to the Greek intramural league, if your school makes such a distinction.

I have one better :)

Below is the annual Sorority Beach VBall tourney at my alma mater, UCSB. Yes, I did play volleyball :)


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f88iGnNsjNg&NR=1

Yea you "One Up'd this guy". . . nice vid! :). Some of these girls kinda know how to play.

-Jon

saeta119
07-24-2009, 01:20 PM
Well I kinda went a diff way, lol.

I found the hottie first, and then I taught her how to play tennis.

Takes a bit longer but it works!

My wife started as a 1.0 about a year and a half ago, she's now almost a 3.0 and we're playing a doubles tournament tomorrow.

Hopefully by next year she'll be a 3.5

princess bossass
07-25-2009, 03:34 PM
ah...how old are you.

I'm 30. But a young thirty. :wink: Get carded at the bars and everything. :)

precision2b
07-25-2009, 06:37 PM
Well I kinda went a diff way, lol.

I found the hottie first, and then I taught her how to play tennis.

Takes a bit longer but it works!

My wife started as a 1.0 about a year and a half ago, she's now almost a 3.0 and we're playing a doubles tournament tomorrow.

Hopefully by next year she'll be a 3.5

Good Job!!!

dennis10is
07-26-2009, 03:34 PM
Yea you "One Up'd this guy". . . nice vid! :). Some of these girls kinda know how to play.

-Jon

Beach Vball is a big deal at SB. It is almost a rites of passage, when I went there, to learn how to play while you are there.

Mixed doubles in tennis is nice but mixed doubles in volleyball or just coed volleyball is great for the two sexes to meet.

MomentumGT
07-26-2009, 04:53 PM
Beach Vball is a big deal at SB. It is almost a rites of passage, when I went there, to learn how to play while you are there.

Mixed doubles in tennis is nice but mixed doubles in volleyball or just coed volleyball is great for the two sexes to meet.

My girlfriend in college at the time was in a sorority and competed in those Greek Games. . . for some odd reason I never attended. :(

-Jon

zapvor
07-26-2009, 08:02 PM
I'm 30. But a young thirty. :wink: Get carded at the bars and everything. :)

outstanding. i am going to have to bug you more later when i get rejected

thejackal
07-26-2009, 08:16 PM
Something that happened today showed me once again that women are jealous and insecure creatures. the more attractive they are, the moreso. Nothing serious, but never forget that.

zapvor
07-26-2009, 08:43 PM
what happened? thats fairly common knowledge

maverick66
07-26-2009, 08:49 PM
I'm 30. But a young thirty. :wink: Get carded at the bars and everything. :)

Ive been told many times that women hit their peaks in the 30's so things are looking up.:)

princess bossass
07-26-2009, 08:57 PM
outstanding. i am going to have to bug you more later when i get rejected

Word. Learning how to handle rejection is where you learn grace and dignity. You learn to feel good about it when you learn to brush it off.

Ive been told many times that women hit their peaks in the 30's so things are looking up.:)

I've heard the same thing. I'll report back when I hit 31 :wink:

zapvor
07-26-2009, 09:13 PM
Word. Learning how to handle rejection is where you learn grace and dignity. You learn to feel good about it when you learn to brush it off.



I've heard the same thing. I'll report back when I hit 31 :wink:

what i dont like is girls auto assume you trying to get at them when you are chatting for fun. i am like 1 for 562852 so yea...lol

Christieland
07-27-2009, 10:48 AM
Has anyone asked about location?

In the bay area, in California, it seems like there are tons of single gals who are strong players, and although they tend to be upper twenties and thirties they're in great shape.

I'm one of those girls that played competitive tennis in high school and in college...and then quit when I graduated. Was just over it. Didn't join adult leagues until I turned 30 and decided I needed a hobby other than chasing boys or wondering when a boy was going to call/text/email/etc. Girls in their twenties are often too wrapped up in all that to do something interesting for themselves outside of work or husband-chasing.

I once went to play a match at Courtside and my teammate told me that her friend, a member there at the club, thought I was cute. We went out a few times and are still friends.

I don't know other cities and towns very well but it seems like most of the single action would be in the public parks, especially at 4.0 and up. Joining a club seems like a couples and marrieds thing to do and there rarely seem to be many strong female players at nice tennis clubs.

tennisnoob2
07-27-2009, 12:54 PM
when I was single i made a big mistake. I met a young woman at a tennis social, and we got together for drinks one night and had a nice time. Then we got together to play tennis. Well, I thought I needed to impress her with my tennis skills, so I proceeded to beat her 6-0. She wouldn't return my calls after that. So, the moral of the story, let her take a few games off of you.

lol wow. did you like smash it at her

princess bossass
07-27-2009, 09:25 PM
Okay, today I got approached on the courts in a totally positive and convincing way.

My female friend and I were waiting for what looked like a couple to get off the court. We asked how long they thought they'd be, and they were really nice. It was 5-1 second set, and the guy was like, "Probably another game, then some hitting around--maybe 15-20 minutes?" We said great, and in the case of a massive comeback we'd just root for the underdog.

After they gave us their court, the guy came up to me, thanked me for our patience, and asked if we played there regularly. I said, yeah, this time, usually. He said the girl he was hitting with was moving to St. Louis, and he'd really like to find some new fun people to hit with, said he'd look for us.

Very pleasant, non-threatening, friendly exchange. Not exactly what we've been talking about on this thread, but it made me think of y'all.

LetFirstServe
07-28-2009, 05:11 AM
#5 on google.

http://www.google.ca/search?q=tennis+dating

princess bossass
07-28-2009, 07:46 AM
#5 on google.

http://www.google.ca/search?q=tennis+dating

Nice! And I highly doubt we could be expected to surpass tennisdating.net, hehehe...

TheMagicianOfPrecision
07-28-2009, 10:23 AM
Cool thread...Goodlooking nice Swedish guy,29 years old, former professional player, working as tenniscoach, 6`1 220 Ibs, dark hair blue eyes...any nice American lady available?:):twisted:

princess bossass
07-28-2009, 12:29 PM
Cool thread...Goodlooking nice Swedish guy,29 years old, former professional player, working as tenniscoach, 6`1 220 Ibs, dark hair blue eyes...any nice American lady available?:):twisted:


If you live in Chicago, I might pass out...

gameboy
07-28-2009, 12:45 PM
Too bad he really looks like this...
http://i117.photobucket.com/albums/o42/avser/1008_jenkins.jpg

TheMagicianOfPrecision
07-28-2009, 01:36 PM
If you live in Chicago, I might pass out...
Uhm no...I live in Sweden:???:

TheMagicianOfPrecision
07-28-2009, 01:37 PM
Too bad he really looks like this...
http://i117.photobucket.com/albums/o42/avser/1008_jenkins.jpg
Lol, that my friend...was very funny:)

maverick66
07-28-2009, 04:12 PM
You're clearly a real charmer.

you know all the girls fall at his feet. Women like to be called names and treated like dirt.:)

Cool thread...Goodlooking nice Swedish guy,29 years old, former professional player, working as tenniscoach, 6`1 220 Ibs, dark hair blue eyes...any nice American lady available?:):twisted:

Didnt know tw turned into a dating site. :-?

gocard
07-28-2009, 04:26 PM
Cool thread...Goodlooking nice Swedish guy,29 years old, former professional player, working as tenniscoach, 6`1 220 Ibs, dark hair blue eyes...any nice American lady available?:):twisted:

haha nice. before you know it people will start rating themselves in 9.5+/10 condition to be able to post on this thread ;)

zapvor
07-28-2009, 04:34 PM
Okay, today I got approached on the courts in a totally positive and convincing way.

My female friend and I were waiting for what looked like a couple to get off the court. We asked how long they thought they'd be, and they were really nice. It was 5-1 second set, and the guy was like, "Probably another game, then some hitting around--maybe 15-20 minutes?" We said great, and in the case of a massive comeback we'd just root for the underdog.

After they gave us their court, the guy came up to me, thanked me for our patience, and asked if we played there regularly. I said, yeah, this time, usually. He said the girl he was hitting with was moving to St. Louis, and he'd really like to find some new fun people to hit with, said he'd look for us.

Very pleasant, non-threatening, friendly exchange. Not exactly what we've been talking about on this thread, but it made me think of y'all.

thats the thing. i do the same thing when i go to hit sometimes, and usually we end up hitting around. more often than not i even get their number. but when i call, they never pick up. so what did i do?? am i too modest? because i tell them i suck, and then i proceed to outrally them fairly easily :(

zapvor
07-28-2009, 04:35 PM
Has anyone asked about location?

In the bay area, in California, it seems like there are tons of single gals who are strong players, and although they tend to be upper twenties and thirties they're in great shape.

I'm one of those girls that played competitive tennis in high school and in college...and then quit when I graduated. Was just over it. Didn't join adult leagues until I turned 30 and decided I needed a hobby other than chasing boys or wondering when a boy was going to call/text/email/etc. Girls in their twenties are often too wrapped up in all that to do something interesting for themselves outside of work or husband-chasing.

I once went to play a match at Courtside and my teammate told me that her friend, a member there at the club, thought I was cute. We went out a few times and are still friends.

I don't know other cities and towns very well but it seems like most of the single action would be in the public parks, especially at 4.0 and up. Joining a club seems like a couples and marrieds thing to do and there rarely seem to be many strong female players at nice tennis clubs.
lol husband chasing. is that really whats going on? yea i think parks are much better than clubs. more strangers than people who already have attachments

gameboy
07-28-2009, 09:48 PM
thats the thing. i do the same thing when i go to hit sometimes, and usually we end up hitting around. more often than not i even get their number. but when i call, they never pick up. so what did i do?? am i too modest? because i tell them i suck, and then i proceed to outrally them fairly easily :(

Sigh, been there done that. Let me give you some advice that took me WAY too long to learn.

If you are interested in someone, don't beat around the bush. Ask them that you are interested romatically and would like to take them out for a date. Not some friendly get together, but an actual real live date.

Why would you spend hours hitting balls together, and not ask them out on the court in person? The only reason you need the phone number is so that you can finalize the details of your date, not to ask her out.

I used to believe when I was young that, I need to get to know the girl first, become her friend before asking her out. Trust me, that never works. Only when I started saying "I think you are very attractive and I would like to take you out on a date." pretty much right after I met them did my fortunes turn.

My advice is that the first time you hit with a girl, feel out to see if you have any chemistry. If you believe you do, ask her out before you leave. If she says no, you had a good time hitting, and it is time to move on. If she says yes, you get her phone number and move on from there.

If the girl is a REALLY good hitting partner, then for GOD SAKES DON'T ASK HER OUT!!! You can always find a girl to go out on a date, it is pretty rare to find a girl you can really hit with.