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View Full Version : NEED Some encouragement and PERSPECTIVE


monkeyisland90
11-30-2009, 01:42 PM
So i basically lost to a guy who i won twice before but this time was in a tournament that was super sets (just one set) and I basically played timid, confused, occasional good shots, while the opponent was focused, and seemed to have a plan against me. I thought he played great and gave him all good credit and all but it dawned on me how much the sting hurts... because i play a lot and always practice for these kinds of moments because it seems like my subconcious mind starts reminding me about my past chokes and history (example: had a tournament where i was leading 5-1 third final set and opponent came back and won..lol) and seems cycle repeats itself and is really starting to define me and nab my confidence, fun factor, and true nature of the game... No pain, no gain i get that quote but seems like for me it's more pain = more pain.... im still gonna keep playing but that's what prevents me from entering tournaments more and more... (and the money portion..lol) So far it's been two days and somewhat over it.. but it's always in back of my mind and bothers me.... I thought playing more and more tennis i would get over stuff like this in heartbeat but it seems like it's become a obssesion and starting to define me!!! i always try to remind myself its just a game... but we all know it's more then that... and playing 2-3 hrs in match giving it all you have ... really is essentially part of your soul isn't it? (unless your playing for fun... which is quite hard in tournaments and leagues).. but yeah i've read all the inner game of tennis books etc... and it helps a lot but change doesnt happen by reading but by experiencing (at least my life).



maybe i need to see a shrink and is more related to my personality/character then my game :) (like some social phobia... don't like meeting new players.. just shy thats all..lol)

I

Kostas
11-30-2009, 01:51 PM
Encouragement:

You're good enough...
You're smart enough...
and gosh darnit...people like you

Perspective:

Life could be worse...you could have been born a cockroach.

arche3
12-01-2009, 05:18 AM
lol. I could of written that. I am usually able to keep it together and win but somedays I completely lose it and get beat by someone who I should soundly beat. I get very upset at myself. I know it is recreational tennis but I get down on myself regardless. I just really hate losing.

mikeler
12-01-2009, 05:22 AM
Enjoy the fact that you are out on the tennis court. I'm currently sidelined with an injury :(

MrTennis
12-01-2009, 12:44 PM
So i basically lost to a guy who i won twice before but this time was in a tournament that was super sets (just one set) and I basically played timid, confused, occasional good shots, while the opponent was focused, and seemed to have a plan against me. I thought he played great and gave him all good credit and all but it dawned on me how much the sting hurts... because i play a lot and always practice for these kinds of moments because it seems like my subconcious mind starts reminding me about my past chokes and history (example: had a tournament where i was leading 5-1 third final set and opponent came back and won..lol) and seems cycle repeats itself and is really starting to define me and nab my confidence, fun factor, and true nature of the game... No pain, no gain i get that quote but seems like for me it's more pain = more pain.... im still gonna keep playing but that's what prevents me from entering tournaments more and more... (and the money portion..lol) So far it's been two days and somewhat over it.. but it's always in back of my mind and bothers me.... I thought playing more and more tennis i would get over stuff like this in heartbeat but it seems like it's become a obssesion and starting to define me!!! i always try to remind myself its just a game... but we all know it's more then that... and playing 2-3 hrs in match giving it all you have ... really is essentially part of your soul isn't it? (unless your playing for fun... which is quite hard in tournaments and leagues).. but yeah i've read all the inner game of tennis books etc... and it helps a lot but change doesnt happen by reading but by experiencing (at least my life).



maybe i need to see a shrink and is more related to my personality/character then my game :) (like some social phobia... don't like meeting new players.. just shy thats all..lol)

I


I'm not a tennis pro, but may have some ideas for you in one of my Blog posts. I constantly have to fight the same demons everyone else is fighting, and so do you. Recalling my own Blog posts and their content helped me lately tremendously.

Here it is: http://community.active.com/blogs/tennislove

I call myself a Scrappy 4.0 and I'm proud of it, haha.

OroDeSantoro
12-01-2009, 04:07 PM
edit......

Klaus
12-01-2009, 04:43 PM
See my thread "WTF has happened to my game?" Which deals with this exact topic. There was a lot of very valuable feedback which has helped me back to victory!

I too suffered from this exact phenomenon. Some people have also suggested that I was too "nice" and didn't want to destroy my opponent at 5-1 because then he may not want to play with me anymore.

Be honest with yourself and really analyze what you are doing to contribute to this pattern.

I was greatly helped by the kind and perspicacious words and ideas the people had here--and you will be too. Just read what they had to say and don't be afraid to employ a different mind set.

Swissv2
12-01-2009, 04:47 PM
At least you were not born in the 1200s when tennis did not exist and people dueled each other to the death.