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View Full Version : how to defeat envy....


monkeyisland90
11-30-2009, 01:04 PM
Ok, I can disguise it, act like envy isn't a factor but deep inside i know it is a factor and i want ways to combat this painful awareness of someone being better then you.. syndrome.... When i play my a tennis buddy i usually don't care much about win or loss because we know it's just a game and any given day one or other will come on top. And also we are having fun and that takes lot of pressure off (well sometimes at least).. But there's times where you know you can beat someone that you rarely play but the tables get turned and you are the defeated foe. How can i get over this pain? I know one quote that sort of helped me "there is always someone better then you" (in all areas of life).. but if theres more then losing is not that bad.... but my subconscious mind always has stuff like this hidden...and brings it forth light ... how can i zap that away? ..probally a shrink..lol


I know the bible says "envy is driving force of sucess" and i do believe that to be true as im wondering myself why i keep playing this day in and day out... probally cause of envy :)

MomentumGT
11-30-2009, 01:11 PM
Use it to better your tennis game. Eventually those who you are envious of prior won't be able to beat you anymore. Use that as a marker for your progression to a higher level of playing.

That or you can continue to give the stink eye to everyone on the courts that you are envious of. Eventually you'll be found out and be labeled a "hater". LOL.

-Jon

Mick
11-30-2009, 01:23 PM
imo, the game of tennis is very fair. the person who practices the most usually would become more successful.

LuckyR
12-01-2009, 09:55 AM
Ok, I can disguise it, act like envy isn't a factor but deep inside i know it is a factor and i want ways to combat this painful awareness of someone being better then you.. syndrome.... When i play my a tennis buddy i usually don't care much about win or loss because we know it's just a game and any given day one or other will come on top. And also we are having fun and that takes lot of pressure off (well sometimes at least).. But there's times where you know you can beat someone that you rarely play but the tables get turned and you are the defeated foe. How can i get over this pain? I know one quote that sort of helped me "there is always someone better then you" (in all areas of life).. but if theres more then losing is not that bad.... but my subconscious mind always has stuff like this hidden...and brings it forth light ... how can i zap that away? ..probally a shrink..lol


I know the bible says "envy is driving force of sucess" and i do believe that to be true as im wondering myself why i keep playing this day in and day out... probally cause of envy :)


Maybe it's me, but I don't understand if you are asking how to rid yourself of an unhelpful attitude or how this attitude contributes negatively to your post match experience.

Oldracquet27
12-02-2009, 10:49 AM
Are you sure you feel the "envy" just for the tennis game of that person? It is not anything else, looks, status, personality? I have never heard anybody feeling that way.

As somebody said the one who practice more or play more will have a better game. You just need to do the same and become better to beat that oponent. You think you will never can get there? I don't think you are that bad of an athlete, or .... maybe yes????? Still , if you feel that your ability is not enough don't feel bad and just enjoy the match, or if you ego is that big that you hate been average forever, switch sports to something easier...

Annika
12-02-2009, 01:20 PM
Envy is a character defect which you need to get rid of. It's a waste of energy. It can cause resentment. You can become isolated. So shape up!

Cindysphinx
12-02-2009, 07:37 PM
Why would anyone envy a recreational tennis player?

I mean, if you are going to be envious, be envious of Nadal. $25 millions in winnings and many times that it endorsements before the age of 25? Dang.

BMC9670
12-03-2009, 05:10 AM
Envy is a product of trying to control what is beyond your control. Take control and improve YOUR game. You can't control what other people do or have.

Sup2Dresq
12-03-2009, 05:26 AM
Regarding losing and the envy that follows.

I enjoy this movie quote which coincidentally was said on a tennis court. It really hits home about how one acts on a loss and how to look at the "whole picture".

You'll come to see that a man learns nothing from winning. The act of losing, however, can elicit great wisdom. Not least of which is, uh... how much more enjoyable it is to win. It's inevitable to lose now and again. The trick is not to make a habit of it.

BMC9670
12-03-2009, 06:50 AM
... or try this movie quote: "If you're not first, your last." - Ricky Bobby.:)

BMC9670
12-03-2009, 06:53 AM
... and my favorite of all time: "Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, sometimes... it rains." - Crash Davis, Bull Durham.

(I use this one when my son is upset by losing)

Bad Dog
12-03-2009, 08:38 AM
It's inevitable to lose now and again. The trick is not to make a habit of it. [/I]

Disciples of Sup2Dresq should recognize that this used to be his signature. :)