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rnrockz1
07-07-2010, 03:32 PM
Ok I like this girl and I hang out with her a lot and I want to tell her that I do like her, but this other guy keeps on pleasing her and I think he likes her too. I don't know who she likes, though she gets pleased by him...I need help- do I tell her, or something! I'm so stressed out rite now from this:cry:..I'm trying to please her too! I've known her since I was child!

OrangeOne
07-07-2010, 03:35 PM
a. I think 'pleasing her' is possibly the wrong choice of words. I'd assume you meant "making her happy / making her laugh".

b. Just ask her out. Life's too short. If she says no, meet more people, ask another girl out. If she says yes, go out.

rnrockz1
07-07-2010, 03:38 PM
a. I think 'pleasing her' is possibly the wrong choice of words. I'd assume you meant "making her happy / making her laugh".

b. Just ask her out. Life's too short. If she says no, meet more people, ask another girl out. If she says yes, go out.

a. Yep thats what I meant
b. Thanks for the advice...easier said than done :/

OrangeOne
07-07-2010, 03:43 PM
a. Yep thats what I meant
b. Thanks for the advice...easier said than done :/

Life is easier said than done! Ever heard the saying that "nothing worthwhile is easy"? It's often true. What is there really to lose here? Nothing at all. If she says no, and she's a decent person, it shouldn't change much. If she says yes, it's great.

Either way, getting up the courage to ask this girl will help you infinitely when it comes to asking out the next girl if this one isn't the one!

Tina
07-07-2010, 03:54 PM
How about I like this guy a lot? He is a few years younger than I am. Should I go for it?

r2473
07-07-2010, 03:57 PM
Ok I like this girl and I hang out with her a lot and I want to tell her that I do like her, but this other guy keeps on pleasing her and I think he likes her too.

a. I think 'pleasing her' is possibly the wrong choice of words.

That was the first thing I noticed (and laughed right out loud).

rnrockz1
07-07-2010, 04:03 PM
How about I like this guy a lot? He is a few years younger than I am. Should I go for it?

Yea, no age for love

rnrockz1
07-07-2010, 04:04 PM
That was the first thing I noticed (and laughed right out loud).

Im really stressed out tho....IDK what to do..

Tina
07-07-2010, 04:08 PM
Yea, no age for love

Seriously? I really can't resist his charm:oops:. He is so adorable.

Tina
07-07-2010, 04:16 PM
Im really stressed out tho....IDK what to do..

Take her out for a nice meal and ask her out on a serious date. You must let her know your feeling about her since childhood. All the best:) -Tina

OrangeOne
07-07-2010, 04:21 PM
Take her out for a nice meal and ask her out on a serious date. You must let her know your feeling about her since childhood. All the best:) -Tina

a. He said he's known her since childhood, not that he's loved her forever.

b. Is a nice meal not a serious date?

c. Also - a serious date or a nice meal is often initially way too much pressure. Spending time together is initially more important than the relative 'alone' that is a dinner-date. Go shopping, go to a movie, go ice skating, go and DO something that will allow some time together, but something else to DO other than stare into each other's eyes and have potentially forced conversation. Getting to know someone rarely happens purely through talking.

Tina
07-07-2010, 04:28 PM
a. He said he's known her since childhood, not that he's loved her forever.

b. Is a nice meal not a serious date?

c. Also - a serious date or a nice meal is often initially way too much pressure. Spending time together is initially more important than the relative 'alone' that is a dinner-date. Go shopping, go to a movie, go ice skating, go and DO something that will allow some time together, but something else to DO other than stare into each other's eyes and have potentially forced conversation. Getting to know someone rarely happens purely through talking.

Well, Maybe I am much older than OP:). What I am looking for is so different from what you suggested.

Any suggestion for my case. Please helps! Thanks.

Fifth Set
07-07-2010, 04:42 PM
It's very important that you act on this because (1) you will kick yourself for being scared if you don't; and (2) good ones get snapped up quickly by guys who will not let go of them!

How to do this?

Talk to a friend or family member who you know will give you encouragement to just do it. Whether that encouragement takes the form of building your confidence or just listening to you talk it through, a good soul will see that you want to do it and help you just that little bit to make it happen.

I'm still thankful to a friend (and, actually, his entire family) who helped me get up the nerve to finally ask out a sweet girl I liked - a girl who has been my wife for over 17 years now!

OrangeOne
07-07-2010, 04:50 PM
Well, Maybe I am much older than OP:). What I am looking for is so different from what you suggested.

Any suggestion for my case. Please helps! Thanks.

What you are looking for? So you have to have a meal to be asked out to a serious dinner date to then see if you like someone?

I'd far rather do things with someone. After all, you don't spend life EATING with someone, you spend it LIVING with them.

SuperFly
07-07-2010, 04:53 PM
You just got yourself into a crapload of trouble.

Tina
07-07-2010, 04:58 PM
What you are looking for? So you have to have a meal to be asked out to a serious dinner date to then see if you like someone?

I'd far rather do things with someone. After all, you don't spend life EATING with someone, you spend it LIVING with them.

Thanks for your advice:). Have a nice day!

OrangeOne
07-07-2010, 05:01 PM
You just got yourself into a crapload of trouble.

Care to explain? Or is the explanation somewhat obvious, I mean I am starting to see it.

maverick66
07-07-2010, 05:01 PM
You just got yourself into a crapload of trouble.

your thread was good until people started responding.:)

You guys who dont just ask a girl out make me laugh. The fear of rejection is a silly one once you learn that if they say no there is always another female to try and take out. Especially in high school. If you think you are meeting the girl of your dreams in high school you are dreamer. Right now just ask her out and make all the stupid boyfriend mistakes now and get them over with. This is a learning period and not much else.

Wouldnt you rather get used to asking girls out now then when you are in your 20's?

Tina
07-07-2010, 05:03 PM
It's very important that you act on this because (1) you will kick yourself for being scared if you don't; and (2) good ones get snapped up quickly by guys who will not let go of them!

How to do this?

Talk to a friend or family member who you know will give you encouragement to just do it. Whether that encouragement takes the form of building your confidence or just listening to you talk it through, a good soul will see that you want to do it and help you just that little bit to make it happen.

I'm still thankful to a friend (and, actually, his entire family) who helped me get up the nerve to finally ask out a sweet girl I liked - a girl who has been my wife for over 17 years now!

How sweet that is? I have been in a serious relationship for 7 years until last Xmas. "He" was the one recommended by my church friend for our first date. I used to a bit shy toward guy. Now, I am fearless:).

OrangeOne
07-07-2010, 05:07 PM
Thanks for your advice:). Have a nice day!

Have a nice day? Is that a polite way of telling me to go away? :D

rnrockz1
07-07-2010, 05:20 PM
your thread was good until people started responding.:)

You guys who dont just ask a girl out make me laugh. The fear of rejection is a silly one once you learn that if they say no there is always another female to try and take out. Especially in high school. If you think you are meeting the girl of your dreams in high school you are dreamer. Right now just ask her out and make all the stupid boyfriend mistakes now and get them over with. This is a learning period and not much else.

Wouldnt you rather get used to asking girls out now then when you are in your 20's?

I have had past gf's in my teen years, but this one is very special because I've known her since childhood and I've had a slight crush on her since I was 13...BTW I'm 20.

r2473
07-07-2010, 05:21 PM
How sweet that is? I have been in a serious relationship for 7 years until last Xmas. "He" was the one recommended by my church friend for our first date. I used to a bit shy toward guy. Now, I am fearless:).

Tina
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Jaewonnie
07-07-2010, 05:23 PM
ouch been in such a situation many times. They all turned bad though.

So I gave up going after girls and am now waiting for girls to come after me :D

So far no luck...

rnrockz1
07-07-2010, 05:24 PM
Seriously? I really can't resist his charm:oops:. He is so adorable.

No age for love means age doesn't matter in matter of love..

Tina
07-07-2010, 05:24 PM
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I knew you are coming to me for this:) Hope you get the message about my profession:) Thanks for adverting.

rnrockz1
07-07-2010, 05:25 PM
ouch been in such a situation many times. They all turned bad though.

So I gave up going after girls and am now waiting for girls to come after me :D

So far no luck...

Thats not good for me.....Arrghh I'm torn rite now..I think I'm gonna text her and ask her to go for a movie tomorrow..

raiden031
07-07-2010, 05:26 PM
Ask her out now or the other guy will! She will think you are a wuss and the other guy is a real man who has the ballz to ask her out. Is that what you want?

If you ask her out and she says no, then you won't have to wonder anymore about *hidden* signals, you will know that she doesn't like you like that and you can move on.

If she says yes, then you have reached new heights in your relationship.

Either way, if you take action you will no longer be stuck in no-man's land.

rnrockz1
07-07-2010, 05:27 PM
Ask her out now or the other guy will! She will think you are a wuss and the other guy is a real man who has the ballz to ask her out. Is that what you want?

If you ask her out and she says no, then you won't have to wonder anymore about *hidden* signals, you will know that she doesn't like you like that and you can move on.

If she says yes, then you have reached new heights in your relationship.

Either way, if you take action you will no longer be stuck in no-man's land.

Hmm Maybe tomorrow at the movies, I just txted her and she said yea she'll go with me to the movies tomorrow.

Tina
07-07-2010, 05:28 PM
No age for love means age doesn't matter in matter of love..

I know what you meant. I am still thinking how to approach this guy since we haven't met in person. However, we have been communicating with each other via emails for six months so far. We'll see. Wish me luck! -Tina

OrangeOne
07-07-2010, 05:28 PM
Thats not good for me.....Arrghh I'm torn rite now..I think I'm gonna text her and ask her to go for a movie tomorrow..

Ugh. I know it's common, but texting someone to ask them out? Seems such a chicken option. Also means you'll stress from the moment you send it until you get a reply.

Why not call her?

Hell, girls today might be even shocked that a guy actually had the yellow bouncy things and called them, they might even be impressed.

Jaewonnie
07-07-2010, 05:28 PM
Thats not good for me.....Arrghh I'm torn rite now..I think I'm gonna text her and ask her to go for a movie tomorrow..

lol I guess a 15 y/o with like no experience who doesnt even care about girls right cant give good advice..

T1000
07-07-2010, 05:28 PM
Thats not good for me.....Arrghh I'm torn rite now..I think I'm gonna text her and ask her to go for a movie tomorrow..

I'd rather call her, especially if it's the first date. Textings all right later but for the first I always call or ask in person.

rnrockz1
07-07-2010, 05:29 PM
I know what you meant. I am still thinking how to approach this guy since we haven't meet in person. However, we have been communicating with each other via emails for six months so far. We'll see. Wish me luck! -Tina

Woah! Have you seen a pic of him yet? You shud meet with him..

rnrockz1
07-07-2010, 05:30 PM
I'd rather call her, especially if it's the first date. Textings all right later but for the first I always call or ask in person.

She loves txting so I just did that...besides she said yes already...hmm...maybe tomorrow...I'll tell her..

OrangeOne
07-07-2010, 05:31 PM
Someone should sticky one of these threads, seems they happen about weekly.

OP: I don't have the confidence to ask girl out.

TW: Ask them out, nothing bad can or will likely happen as a result

OP: But I'm really not sure...

etc, etc. :D

OrangeOne
07-07-2010, 05:33 PM
I'd rather call her, especially if it's the first date. Textings all right later but for the first I always call or ask in person.

I said the same thing - then realised it's someone he's known forever, so she's entirely likely to say yes to a movie text as it's something normal - going with a friend to the movies.

Tina
07-07-2010, 05:33 PM
Woah! Have you seen a pic of him yet? You shud meet with him..

Yes, we did exchange our photos. I will plan a visit soon only if our phone conversation goes well in a near future. We''ll see.

Feņa14
07-07-2010, 05:37 PM
Girls are trouble! Plus the World Cup is on, isn't that enough entertainment? :)

rnrockz1
07-07-2010, 05:42 PM
Girls are trouble! Plus the World Cup is on, isn't that enough entertainment? :)

:evil:Bad post.

rnrockz1
07-07-2010, 05:48 PM
How should I ask her out tomorrow if I were to?

OrangeOne
07-07-2010, 05:52 PM
Girls are trouble! Plus the World Cup is on, isn't that enough entertainment? :)

Yeah, I'd rather watch soccer too. Or actually, no, I really wouldn't.

http://s11.bdbphotos.com/images/orig/a/e/aebphxlzmeerpbxr.jpg

Tina
07-07-2010, 05:52 PM
How should I ask her out tomorrow if I were to?

Call her tonight and say " let's go for a movie tomorrow afternoon". You might want to say " I heard it's a good movie.. everyone is recommended...."
Let's go for a meal at night and say "I heard the place offers a nice service...."

Bottom line is, You have to pay for all these.:)

Good Luck, my young friend:)

OrangeOne
07-07-2010, 05:57 PM
How should I ask her out tomorrow if I were to?

I've dated people i've been friends with, some for quite a while, none for as long as you have with this girl.

I'd either go with "have you ever thought about us as more than friends?" or "I've liked you as more than a friend for a while now".

There is the insurance option, which is to ask her if there's anyone she's interested in. If she starts talking about her crush on another guy, and it's something serious-ish sounding, well, you have your 'easy way out' avoidance option right there. If she, on the other hand, is fairly quiet and coy, well, maybe that's a sign to talk more. That said, in either case if you're genuine about how you feel, it is much better to say something than not. Maybe she's only into the other guy as she figured you weren't an option, or maybe (definitely) she'll see you in a new light after you mention you liked her. The power of suggestion is very high.

If she starts describing you and then you both grin and madly make out, start tapping on the screen to get out, as it's likely you're in a movie.

OrangeOne
07-07-2010, 06:01 PM
Call her tonight and say " let's go for a movie tomorrow afternoon". You might want to say " I heard it's a good movie.. everyone is recommended...."

He's already seeing a movie with her tomorrow. That was decided many, many posts ago???

Let's go for a meal at night and say "I heard the place offers a nice service...."Oh my, is it the 1920s? Nice service? How about great food? more to the point, how about showing interest in the person (I'd love to have dinner with you) and not the service (let's go somewhere as it has nice service).

Bottom line is, You have to pay for all these.:)Again, it's not 1920. The guy should still offer to pay, but I'd be more impressed if a girl at least offered to split it, or better, said ok, but that she'll get the next time / the coffee after / whatever.

Tina
07-07-2010, 06:04 PM
...r.


Please give me some advice on how to approach the guy I like. That's more important than anything else to me now. I have never made a first move. Thanks.:)

Feņa14
07-07-2010, 06:06 PM
Yeah, I'd rather watch soccer too. Or actually, no, I really wouldn't.

http://s11.bdbphotos.com/images/orig/a/e/aebphxlzmeerpbxr.jpg

Haha! I'd have to still take the football, if i'm honest!

OrangeOne
07-07-2010, 06:17 PM
Please give me some advice on how to approach the guy I like. That's more important than anything else to me now. I have never made a first move. Thanks.:)

Be honest.

If he's a decent guy, he'll be flattered at worst, and way more than that at best.

Similar advice as I gave to the OP - feel him out with questions first, check that he's not secretly madly in love with someone else. If that's not the case, suggest that you two spend some time together. If this is an internet thing - you'll have to meet.

If you are meeting him for the first time off the internet, make sure that you meet him somewhere where you have friends there, be it a party or whatever. Safety is important, and there are many people who can spin wonderful stories online who are horrid people. You can tell people you met the day before at a pub, it matters not what the story is, but put safety first. If he's a decent guy he'll more than understand. If he shows one tiny bit of hesitation at not wanting to meet you where there are other people around, well, i'd be suspicious to the point of moving on right there and then.

Tina
07-07-2010, 06:23 PM
Be honest.

If he's a decent guy, he'll be flattered at worst, and way more than that at best.

Similar advice as I gave to the OP - feel him out with questions first, check that he's not secretly madly in love with someone else. If that's not the case, suggest that you two spend some time together. If this is an internet thing - you'll have to meet.

If you are meeting him for the first time off the internet, make sure that you meet him somewhere where you have friends there, be it a party or whatever. Safety is important, and there are many people who can spin wonderful stories online who are horrid people. You can tell people you met the day before at a pub, it matters not what the story is, but put safety first. If he's a decent guy he'll more than understand. If he shows one tiny bit of hesitation at not wanting to meet you where there are other people around, well, i'd be suspicious to the point of moving on right there and then.

Thank you so much, OO. I will keep that in mind.

rnrockz1
07-07-2010, 06:37 PM
Be honest.

If he's a decent guy, he'll be flattered at worst, and way more than that at best.

Similar advice as I gave to the OP - feel her out with questions first, check that she's not secretly madly in love with someone else.

We'll have to see tomorrow how it goes with her:shock::?

maverick66
07-07-2010, 08:07 PM
Haha! I'd have to still take the football, if i'm honest!

Why cant you have both?:)


If your 20 man up and go do it. its as simple as do you want to go to the movies. Thats it just ask. You could do something corny as hell but that sucks. Just call her I repeat call and ask her out on a date. Asking a bunch of people on forum isnt gonna help you. You know what needs to be done now go do it.

Feņa14
07-07-2010, 08:44 PM
Why cant you have both?:)

My Dad would tell you it's not possible! Once you're married, the wife always manages to find odd jobs to be done when the football's on :)

maverick66
07-07-2010, 08:44 PM
My Dad would tell you it's not possible! Once you're married, the wife always manages to find odd jobs to be done when the football's on :)

Ask your dad why he let her out of the kitchen?

Photoshop
07-07-2010, 09:07 PM
I'm probably in the minority when I say this but don't do it. You guys have known each other since childhood... she probably already put you in the friend zone then. Once you ask her out, things are going to get pretty awkward. Don't risk losing a close friend b/c of the temporary feelings you've developed for her. Rather, drop tons of hints and see how she reacts. We all know exactly how you feel... think long and hard before you make a move.

Tina
07-07-2010, 11:07 PM
What? I'm talking about my girl lol.

Hey, my young friend. All the best for your date tomorrow:). -Tina

Kobble
07-07-2010, 11:12 PM
Please give me some advice on how to approach the guy I like. That's more important than anything else to me now. I have never made a first move. Thanks.:)
This is hard? Its as easy a coaxing sharks to blood. Truthfully, I don't really get all the signals. Take for instance a real scenario.

1. Saw her and thought, she seems very professional, and cute.

2. Later on, she was very strict about how she wanted a project done: Hmmm! Kind of strong willed, and cute, too.

3. Criticized my work some, but overall she liked it: Kind of a *****, but getting hotter to me.

4. Talks about her marriage: Ohhhhhhhh (let down). Ahhh, she is still hot.

5. Thinking about her marriage: I don't really care. I'll talk to her anyway. Keep it professional, somewhat.

6. Talked to her: Made her nervous a bit. I think she was sure I would ask her out. I didn't. I may be stupid or shallow, but I'm not a creep.

7. Made a joke concerning, in a vague suggestive manner, her hotness. ******* told her friend what I said. Yet, she approached me very nice, and was friendly. Probably flattered a bit. At that time, we hadn't worked together for a while. I quickly remembered how hot she was. The incident helped solidify our friendship.

8. Overall, wound up in the friend zone of a young woman who really didn't befriend any men I knew of. Every guy I talked to felt she was a *****. She probably heard all the ***** rumors, and I was the first guy who had nothing bad to say.

So, with this level of reasoning, you think it is difficult to give guys the green light?


--------------------------------------------------------------------

To the original poster,

I've been in some of those childhood friend turned later friend. I'll say this, you may not want to meet her future boyfriends. I showed up at a party to a girl I knew from 7 years old. Met her boyfriend, or ex, whatever. He asks me all nervous, how do you know Brook?

Me: We are friends.

Him: Well...I'm her boyfriend.

Me: Oh. (who gives a ****)

I think if I could do one thing all over again. Now, maybe this is some kind of brain chemical gone out of control. I think I would have sex with the girl, and then claim to be gay to the boyfriend. Imagine the mind**** he would be going through. Everyday, wondering how he measured up.

Blinkism
07-08-2010, 12:27 AM
Don't trip your self out. Getting into the first stages of a relationship is the easy part.

The challenging part is when you've been with someone for a while.... say 5 years.... and haven't proposed to her.... and she reminds you of it..... almost daily

Anyways, have fun! :lol:

Hot Sauce
07-08-2010, 02:26 AM
If you havin' girl problems I feel bad for you, son.

struggle
07-08-2010, 10:38 AM
Get a pizza and a twelve pack. The rest will take care of itself.

rnrockz1
07-08-2010, 11:06 AM
Im leaving now for the movie :P. Wish me luck.

Slazenger07
07-08-2010, 12:37 PM
Just go for it, if you dont somebody else will. Be the player, not the person who gets played.

rnrockz1
07-08-2010, 02:49 PM
Wow what a day. We got there, and then she met one of her friends and she sat with me and her friend. I fel it wasn't the rite time when her friend was around...She invited only me to her house tomorrow so tomorrow for sure I'll ask her.

raiden031
07-08-2010, 02:59 PM
I'm probably in the minority when I say this but don't do it. You guys have known each other since childhood... she probably already put you in the friend zone then. Once you ask her out, things are going to get pretty awkward. Don't risk losing a close friend b/c of the temporary feelings you've developed for her. Rather, drop tons of hints and see how she reacts. We all know exactly how you feel... think long and hard before you make a move.

I totally disagree with this. While I agree there is a good chance he is in the *friend zone*, it is still worth pursuing and finding out whether there is any chance to become a couple. Ruining the friendship should not be an issue at all. The friendship is already ruined because one of the parties likes the other as more than a friend.

It is impossible to truly be a good friend when you have a crush on your friend. You will always wonder if they like you the same, you will hate when they ask you advice about pursuing someone else of the opposite sex, and of course you'll be jealous as hell if they start dating someone, all while pretending everything is just fine. Who wants that kind of friendship?

Instead, if he comes clean now and finds out she doesn't like him, it might be difficult for a while but this info will allow him to move on rather quickly to someone else. Then when the smoke clears they can remain friends, and this will be a more honest relationship because maybe she will keep hush hush about her interest in other guys while around him.

Fifth Set
07-08-2010, 03:20 PM
I totally disagree with this. While I agree there is a good chance he is in the *friend zone*, it is still worth pursuing and finding out whether there is any chance to become a couple. Ruining the friendship should not be an issue at all. The friendship is already ruined because one of the parties likes the other as more than a friend.

It is impossible to truly be a good friend when you have a crush on your friend. You will always wonder if they like you the same, you will hate when they ask you advice about pursuing someone else of the opposite sex, and of course you'll be jealous as hell if they start dating someone, all while pretending everything is just fine. Who wants that kind of friendship?

Instead, if he comes clean now and finds out she doesn't like him, it might be difficult for a while but this info will allow him to move on rather quickly to someone else. Then when the smoke clears they can remain friends, and this will be a more honest relationship because maybe she will keep hush hush about her interest in other guys while around him.

Wise analysis here. Just fine to be friends if that sexual tension is truly not applicable.

GetBetterer
07-08-2010, 03:28 PM
There's always a way to see if she's in a relationship.

Check her Facebook Status. :D

Also, rnrockz1:
She invited only me to her house tomorrow so tomorrow for sure I'll ask her.

Oh the things I'm thinking about that part...ONLY you eh? Hmmm...a good moment indeed, but I think it's not just a relationship she's looking for on that one. ;)

rnrockz1
07-08-2010, 06:21 PM
There's always a way to see if she's in a relationship.

Check her Facebook Status. :D

Also, rnrockz1:


Oh the things I'm thinking about that part...ONLY you eh? Hmmm...a good moment indeed, but I think it's not just a relationship she's looking for on that one. ;)

Haha shes not that type of girl lol. We'll see tomorrow.

Dilettante
07-08-2010, 07:08 PM
Wow what a day. We got there, and then she met one of her friends and she sat with me and her friend. I fel it wasn't the rite time when her friend was around...She invited only me to her house tomorrow so tomorrow for sure I'll ask her.

If she's not that kind of girl, don't go too fast, BUT don't look too innocent either. My vision of it:

"Friend zone" you have to avoid for sure, but be nice, be respectful, be a gentleman -always-, and why not let her notice you like her in a subtle, non pressuring way: make a little joke about it, play a little games with her, make her have a fun time. Being respectful doesn't mean you need to look totally naive: If you keep the respect, she will get it and won't make an issue of it, don't worry.

I know combining respect with being a bit sharp looks hard to do, but it's not: the best way to combine it is the sense of humour. Girls love sense of humour, don't try too hard, don't need to be a standup comedian, don't make bad jokes just for trying to be fun, just need to be yourself and if you like her, don't make a drama of it. Be relaxed about that, laughing a little bit at the situation, play some games, teasing her a bit. You can be fun without being Groucho Marx: just think she's a human being too, she has insecurities and worries just like you, and she will appreciate a guy who doesn't make a drama of little things. That's the way of being fun: not making a drama of a little thing, but making a little game or an anecdote of it. Don't tell jokes, you're not in Paramount Comedy, but look for the funny side of little things that happen with her. Always avoid negative emotions; she may have negative emotions in her life already, don't add any more. Just add positive.

Girls love confident and relaxed guys. Don't try too hard, don't put yourself below her and DON'T sell yourself cheap: treat her with respect but as an equal, don't look desperate and hurried and don't give what you don't get (fairness is important). Listen to her, treat her right, and at the end let her know you had a good time. Don't forget to tell her, there's nothing wrong about it. If she feels relaxed and comfortable with you, there's no reason why she won't like the idea of hanging with you in the future and she will already know she can make you feel alright: that will be good for her ego. All of we like the idea of being capable of making someone feel nice.

There's no much secret about this, it's like tennis really: always looking forward to attack, but if you think a forehand could go too far, just don't make it, relax, make just a subtle slice backhand and wait for the next game.

And never, never, complain to the umpire. Remember: girls also love a guy who can smile even when he loses a point.

dave333
07-08-2010, 09:25 PM
The advice I've heard? "Don't be too nice"

I was in a similar boat as you, I failed.

ttbrowne
07-08-2010, 09:47 PM
From The Godfather:

You can act like a man!

Quit trying to PLEASE her especially if she's interested in this other guy.

GetBetterer
07-08-2010, 11:55 PM
Another good way to find out, is to hold her hand. Slowly inch your hand over, and if she's okay with it, you just cup your hand in a "hold hands" position and, voila!

Slazenger07
07-09-2010, 06:26 AM
Yeah, I'd rather watch soccer too. Or actually, no, I really wouldn't.

http://s11.bdbphotos.com/images/orig/a/e/aebphxlzmeerpbxr.jpg

For once Im gonna have to agree with Orange. Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit. If that was on every channel I could channel surf all day!

rnrockz1
07-09-2010, 09:01 AM
I'm leaving for her house in 2 hours - any suggestions?

r2473
07-09-2010, 10:17 AM
I'm leaving for her house in 2 hours - any suggestions?

That should be just enough time to watch "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" before heading over.

rnrockz1
07-09-2010, 06:19 PM
I did it. I asked her out. She said...........YES! :O :D Thanks guys!

OrangeOne
07-09-2010, 06:21 PM
I did it. I asked her out. She said...........YES! :O :D Thanks guys!

Nice work, well done! Nothing ventured, nothing gained :)

rnrockz1
07-09-2010, 06:29 PM
Nice work, well done! Nothing ventured, nothing gained :)

:):):) IM SO HAPPPPPPYYYY!

r2473
07-09-2010, 06:38 PM
http://i252.photobucket.com/albums/hh34/jessieee_2008/funny.jpg

GetBetterer
07-09-2010, 06:58 PM
Congrats, hope it works out between the two of you. :)

mlktennis
07-09-2010, 07:56 PM
you da man!

Fifth Set
07-09-2010, 09:17 PM
I did it. I asked her out. She said...........YES! :O :D Thanks guys!

Great job and big congrats! How did the conversation go? What approach did you use?

rnrockz1
07-10-2010, 05:40 AM
Great job and big congrats! How did the conversation go? What approach did you use?

I held her hand, and said do you think we can be more than just friends? and she said YES! And then we kinda made out lol

Falloutjr
07-10-2010, 05:49 AM
I held her hand, and said do you think we can be more than just friends? and she said YES! And then we kinda made out lol

Nice dude :P

GetBetterer
07-10-2010, 01:56 PM
rnrockz1:
And then we kinda made out lol

What the hell is kinda? lol

kimbahpnam
07-10-2010, 02:01 PM
i'm surprised you don't have closer friends than TT to confide in about this stuff

GetBetterer
07-10-2010, 02:39 PM
kimbahpnam:
i'm surprised you don't have closer friends than TT to confide in about this stuff

He's new to this (I think). Give him a break, his friends probably know he's new to this and they would probably start gossiping around the school and word would eventually get to her.

It's easier to talk to us because, we don't know who he is, we can't tell his woman, and even if we knew him, we don't know it's him since he's behind a computer monitor with an avatar and a different name.

dave333
07-10-2010, 03:05 PM
Congratulations man

LameTennisPlayer
07-10-2010, 03:59 PM
rnrockz1:


What the hell is kinda? lol

lmao i was about 2 ask the same question

LameTennisPlayer
07-10-2010, 04:06 PM
ok, i have a question to, i like this girl that i see often, tbh i have no problems with asking her out, however i am unsure if she is in a relationship; i am also friends with her gf, who i knows is a spoil sport and likes to gossip etc by the way she talks to me; im thinking if i should ask the gf first if the girl i like has a bf risking that she may let her now etc, or if i should ask her directly... just wondering which would be more successful; she is also chinese; i haven't dated any chinese before her friend is alot older as in 10+ yrs older; yet she likes to gossip about anything lmao but she's her best friend kind of unsure which way 2 go.

Viper
07-10-2010, 04:11 PM
Dang. This thread was a success for this dude. Congrats.

LameTennisPlayer
07-10-2010, 04:24 PM
oh i forgot to add that if i dont successfully ask her out etc, i still have 2 see her 3x a week lmao

rnrockz1
07-10-2010, 04:35 PM
lmao i was about 2 ask the same question

Sorry I was really elated at that time, take out the kinda.:)

GetBetterer
07-10-2010, 06:30 PM
LameTennisPlayer:
ok, i have a question to, i like this girl that i see often, tbh i have no problems with asking her out, however i am unsure if she is in a relationship; i am also friends with her gf, who i knows is a spoil sport and likes to gossip etc by the way she talks to me; im thinking if i should ask the gf first if the girl i like has a bf risking that she may let her now etc, or if i should ask her directly... just wondering which would be more successful; she is also chinese; i haven't dated any chinese before her friend is alot older as in 10+ yrs older; yet she likes to gossip about anything lmao but she's her best friend kind of unsure which way 2 go.

What don't you understand about: Check Facebook page!!!

Also, you have an advantage. Wait for that time to go by so you can see her 3x a week, and then befriend her, ask her out! Voila! Done.

rnrockz1:
Sorry I was really elated at that time, take out the kinda.

REALLY elated huh? Oh my, this guy doesn't know the difference between making out and doing it... -_-

rnrockz1
07-10-2010, 06:31 PM
LameTennisPlayer:


What don't you understand about: Check Facebook page!!!

Also, you have an advantage. Wait for that time to go by so you can see her 3x a week, and then befriend her, ask her out! Voila! Done.

rnrockz1:


REALLY elated huh? Oh my, this guy doesn't know the difference between making out and doing it... -_-
I do know believe me ;)

LameTennisPlayer
07-10-2010, 06:40 PM
[QUOTE=GetBetterer;4857017]LameTennisPlayer:


What don't you understand about: Check Facebook page!!!

Also, you have an advantage. Wait for that time to go by so you can see her 3x a week, and then befriend her, ask her out! Voila! Done.

....well i don't have her on my facebook, id rather ask her out then ask her to join my facebook friends lol, i'm already seeing her 3x per week, just not sure whether to ask her straight out, or ask her friend if she is in a relationship first; i see both of them, and if it fails i still have 2 see her 3 times a week; at this stage i get on well with her friend but i know she will tell her if i ask and im not sure whether this will ruin my chances or not

Falloutjr
07-10-2010, 06:49 PM
[QUOTE=GetBetterer;4857017]LameTennisPlayer:


What don't you understand about: Check Facebook page!!!

Also, you have an advantage. Wait for that time to go by so you can see her 3x a week, and then befriend her, ask her out! Voila! Done.

....well i don't have her on my facebook, id rather ask her out then ask her to join my facebook friends lol, i'm already seeing her 3x per week, just not sure whether to ask her straight out, or ask her friend if she is in a relationship first; i see both of them, and if it fails i still have 2 see her 3 times a week; at this stage i get on well with her friend but i know she will tell her if i ask and im not sure whether this will ruin my chances or not

I wouldn't just come out and ask that. Do what I do and say "I like that _____. Did your boyfriend buy it for you?" or something. Or add her on facebook and say "This picture is cute, is that you and your boyfriend?" it's not that invasive and it's not an awkward thing to ask. I've found asking girls if they have a boyfriend or not to be really direct and if they do that can be rather awkward.

GetBetterer
07-10-2010, 08:20 PM
LameTennisPlayer:
....well i don't have her on my facebook, id rather ask her out then ask her to join my facebook friends lol, i'm already seeing her 3x per week, just not sure whether to ask her straight out, or ask her friend if she is in a relationship first; i see both of them, and if it fails i still have 2 see her 3 times a week; at this stage i get on well with her friend but i know she will tell her if i ask and im not sure whether this will ruin my chances or not

Facebook privacy is so horrible. Just go and look it up without making a Facebook account. You'll see it. If you can't see her status, or more importantly her relationship status, look at her wall, it's public to everybody (most of the time). If she's in a relationship, she'll probably write about it. (i.e. Fun night w/ the best guy evarrr!) Except they may contain more spelling errors than mine.

If Facebook fails you (hasn't failed me yet in breaking up relationships to get with the girls I like...), get to knowing her friend. Get in the conversation of this girl's (the girl that you like) relationship. Something like this:

You:Oh hey X (this is the name of the girl that's her friend, but you don't like), how are you and Y (the girl that you like)?
* If this seems peculiar, you ask about her other friends too.

You:Well that's good (or I'm sorry to hear that), and how is Y doing with Z (some guy you know everybody hates but may have a chance with her).

She (the girl that is her friend) will react in 3 ways:
#1 - Oh, they're fine (but you know he's a **** so they'll break up soon).
#2 - They...never dated in the first place.
* If this is the answer, and 99% of the time it is, you say: "Oh really? I thought she was going out with him *laugh*, oh man, sorry. I could of sworn she was going out with somebody wasn't she?"
#3 - What...the ****? Get away from me, why are you asking about my (best) friend so much (this is usually PMS time and in order to avoid this go sometime in between the month, like between the 10th to 20th).

After your response to #2 the conversation will be easier to pick away at for the girl you like's relationshi(p/t) status.

mlktennis
07-11-2010, 03:51 PM
Sorry I was really elated at that time, take out the kinda.:)

Congrats again, Now don't you feel stupid for not asking her out earlier? You could have been 'kinda making out' for weeks now :)

Advice out there for the young and meek, Be BOLD! Stop playin' and be a PLAYER!

GetBetterer
07-11-2010, 05:51 PM
mlktennis:
Advice out there for the young and meek, Be BOLD! Stop playin' and be a PLAYER!

Old timer ( :D ), what do you mean, "stop playin' and be a player?"

Also, in our time a player is a guy who has sex with a lot of ladies. No real love.

heycal
07-16-2010, 11:52 AM
How about I like this guy a lot? He is a few years younger than I am.

I was under the impression I was a few years older than you, Tina.

ok, i have a question to, i like this girl that i see often, tbh i have no problems with asking her out, however i am unsure if she is in a relationship; i am also friends with her gf, who i knows is a spoil sport and likes to gossip etc by the way she talks to me; im thinking if i should ask the gf first if the girl i like has a bf risking that she may let her now etc, or if i should ask her directly... just wondering which would be more successful; she is also chinese; i haven't dated any chinese before her friend is alot older as in 10+ yrs older; yet she likes to gossip about anything lmao but she's her best friend kind of unsure which way 2 go.

The friend sounds like a C-blocking trouble maker. Go directly to the girl you want to find out her status, perhaps with one of the indirect approaches suggested previously.

Tina
07-16-2010, 01:16 PM
I was under the impression I was a few years older than you, Tina..

Heycal,

I have been known your age for a while. I am at least 15-20 years younger than you are. I have a very respectful job and a degree in a real life. If you really want to get to know me better, why not introduce yourself a bit via a private message. I am looking forward to hearing from you.

Tina

heycal
07-16-2010, 02:39 PM
Heycal,

I have been known your age for a while. I am at least 15-20 years younger than you are. I have a very respectful job and a degree in a real life. If you really want to get to know me better, why not introduce yourself a bit via a private message. I am looking forward to hearing from you.

Tina

I appreciate your invitation, Tina. It's tempting. Alas, I have a new girlfriend (I think she is younger than you actually, so your age is not a problem for me), so I must refrain from finding a second one. Perhaps in the future, if the stars align, you and I can see if we have in real life the same wonderful chemistry and affection for each other that we clearly have online.

muzza123
07-16-2010, 02:54 PM
Ok I like this girl and I hang out with her a lot and I want to tell her that I do like her, but this other guy keeps on pleasing her and I think he likes her too. I don't know who she likes, though she gets pleased by him...I need help- do I tell her, or something! I'm so stressed out rite now from this:cry:..I'm trying to please her too! I've known her since I was child!

Judging by the OP's choice of words, I honestly thought this was a

D
N
I
W

:eek:

Tina
07-16-2010, 03:00 PM
I appreciate your invitation, Tina. It's tempting. Alas, I have a new girlfriend (I think she is younger than you actually, so your age is not a problem for me), so I must refrain from finding a second one. Perhaps in the future, if the stars align, you and I can see if we have in real life the same wonderful chemistry and affection for each other that we clearly have online.

Dear Heycal,

In that case, would you please stop quoting my posts to get attention from me? I believe you are mature enough to know where to draw a line since I've mentioned to you several times I do not feel comfortable to respond your unreasonable questions (mostly, immature). That's put it in this way, my students understand the issue of harassment clearly since high school. I will reply your posts if it appears to me. Hopefully, we have a clear understanding what I expect from you as a friend at TTW. Thank you.

PS. I am not interested in dating people at TTW.

Tina

heycal
07-16-2010, 03:32 PM
Dear Heycal,

In that case, would you please stop quoting my posts to get attention from me? I believe you are mature enough to know where to draw a line since I've mentioned to you several times I do not feel comfortable to respond your unreasonable questions (mostly, immature). That's put it in this way, my students understand the issue of harassment clearly since high school. I will reply your posts if it appears to me. Hopefully, we have a clear understanding what I expect from you as a friend at TTW. Thank you.

PS. I am not interested in dating people at TTW.

Tina

Well, I guess it's true that hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!

But please be consistent, Tina. In one post you invite me to email you personally so we can get to know each other better and "look forward to hearing from you", and in the next you all but accuse me of harrassment and say you are not interested in dating people from TTW?

Which is it, doll face? A man doesn't like mixed messages. (Though we are sure used to them!) You seem to be saying "Don't comment on my forum posts, but please court me privately via email!"

Tina
07-16-2010, 03:34 PM
Well, I guess it's true that hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!

But please be consistent, Tina. In one post you invite me to email you personally so you can get to know me better and "look forward to hearing from you", and in the next you all but accuse me of harrassment and say you are not interested in dating people from TTW?

Which is it, doll face? A man doesn't like mixed messages. (Though we are sure used to them!)

That's a way to scare you off (I did that on purpose)-Sorry. By the way, have you attended graduate school yet? I am just curious about it. Thank you. Tina

SVP
07-16-2010, 03:49 PM
Yeah, I'd rather watch soccer too. Or actually, no, I really wouldn't.

http://s11.bdbphotos.com/images/orig/a/e/aebphxlzmeerpbxr.jpgButterface. (Butherface) Sorry.

heycal
07-16-2010, 03:56 PM
That's a way to scare you off (I did that on purpose)-Sorry. By the way, have you attended graduate school yet? I am just curious about it. Thank you. Tina

Yes, Tina. Some 20 years ago actually. Why are you curious?

Butterface. (Butherface) Sorry.

Are you kidding? This girl has a gorgeous face!

OrangeOne
07-16-2010, 05:18 PM
This thread just gets better and better.

Why is it sometimes I confuse the word 'better' for meaning 'more like a train smash'?

decades
07-16-2010, 05:22 PM
Seriously? I really can't resist his charm:oops:. He is so adorable.

tina google "oneitis"....don't focus on one guy so much. meet a lot of them and increase your "chances" of finding someone nice.

decades
07-16-2010, 05:24 PM
ok, i have a question to, i like this girl that i see often, tbh i have no problems with asking her out, however i am unsure if she is in a relationship; i am also friends with her gf, who i knows is a spoil sport and likes to gossip etc by the way she talks to me; im thinking if i should ask the gf first if the girl i like has a bf risking that she may let her now etc, or if i should ask her directly... just wondering which would be more successful; she is also chinese; i haven't dated any chinese before her friend is alot older as in 10+ yrs older; yet she likes to gossip about anything lmao but she's her best friend kind of unsure which way 2 go.

who cares if she has a BF. Don't ask that question. Ask her out and let her decide if she has one or not.

OrangeOne
07-16-2010, 05:24 PM
tina google "oneitis"....don't focus on one guy so much. meet a lot of them and increase your "chances" of finding someone nice.

Monomaniacal is such a prettier word - and it's real too ;)

decades
07-16-2010, 05:26 PM
Wow what a day. We got there, and then she met one of her friends and she sat with me and her friend. I fel it wasn't the rite time when her friend was around...She invited only me to her house tomorrow so tomorrow for sure I'll ask her.

lol. she invited "only you" to her "house". I think you have your answer staring you in your face.

maverick66
07-16-2010, 05:55 PM
Hey Tina I was looking for a date for Saturday night are you free? :)

OrangeOne
07-16-2010, 06:03 PM
Hey Tina I was looking for a date for Saturday night are you free? :)

Will you stop asking the members of this forum to get.....

LOL.

maverick66
07-16-2010, 06:47 PM
Will you stop asking the members of this forum to get.....

LOL.

All I asked for was a date. I was thinking a nice dinner then maybe a little ice cream after. There is nothing else being asked or implied. So get your mind out of the gutter you slazenger wanna be.:)

Tina
07-16-2010, 06:50 PM
tina google "oneitis"....don't focus on one guy so much. meet a lot of them and increase your "chances" of finding someone nice.

Hey, Thanks. I don't need more than one. :)

OrangeOne
07-16-2010, 07:02 PM
All I asked for was a date. I was thinking a nice dinner then maybe a little ice cream after. There is nothing else being asked or implied. So get your mind out of the gutter you slazenger wanna be.:)

Will you stop making noise! It's bicep day, specifically, my left bicep. I'm on set 47, and you're interrupting me. I'm trying to get ready for my TW Avatar photo!

maverick66
07-16-2010, 07:10 PM
Will you stop making noise! It's bicep day, specifically, my left bicep. I'm on set 47, and you're interrupting me. I'm trying to get ready for my TW Avatar photo!

Maybe if I did more curls Tina would go out with me. :)

Tina
07-16-2010, 07:14 PM
Maybe if I did more curls Tina would go out with me. :)

Maverick, you will meet a nice young girl locally. Don't waste your time on me. I am just an ordinary woman who has a big dream in life. That's all.

maverick66
07-16-2010, 07:26 PM
I like a women who is humble and has big dreams. You sure you dont want that date Tina?

Tina
07-16-2010, 07:27 PM
I like a women who is humble and has big dreams. You sure you dont want that date Tina?

No. Thank you. CC is a nice girl. Why not ask her out on a date:)

heycal
07-16-2010, 10:47 PM
Maverick, you will meet a nice young girl locally. Don't waste your time on me. I am just an ordinary woman who has a big dream in life. That's all.

What is that big dream, Tina?

And why did you want to know if I went to graduate school?

Vermillion
07-16-2010, 11:17 PM
Practice this song, you'll be alright.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kIrcxGdyUdk

SoBad
07-16-2010, 11:21 PM
Practice this song, you'll be alright.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kIrcxGdyUdk

Hah tastes differ. Talking about moon, do you think the savage garden song is cheesy? I like it, for some reason.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HCm6gRHINqA

Vermillion
07-16-2010, 11:27 PM
Not my cup of tea, to be honest.

How about this one?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUCZlzj_B88

Tina
07-16-2010, 11:31 PM
Hah tastes differ. Talking about moon, do you think the savage garden song is cheesy? I like it, for some reason.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HCm6gRHINqA

How do you know this group-savage garden? They are Aussie. One of my favorite in college.

LameTennisPlayer
07-17-2010, 12:57 AM
who cares if she has a BF. Don't ask that question. Ask her out and let her decide if she has one or not.

yeh true, good point... good advice