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View Full Version : Sex the night before a game can have a negative effect on how u play the next morning


Ripper
12-30-2005, 07:48 AM
I used to think this was nothing but an old myth. Then, the other day, I did just that and wasn't feeling 100% the next morning, while playing tennis.

roddick_rulz
12-30-2005, 07:52 AM
well if u dont use a condom then it doesnt feel the same.

Cavaleer
12-30-2005, 09:10 AM
I used to think this was nothing but an old myth. Then, the other day, I did just that and wasn't feeling 100% the next morning, while playing tennis.


You depleted your testosterone stores the night before you needed them the most. Learn the lesson and tell a friend. There is only so much gold to go around. Use it wisely. ;)

penpal
12-30-2005, 09:20 AM
Notice that this same myth doesn't seem to apply to women.

The secret -- stay on bottom ;)

Ash Doyle
12-30-2005, 09:37 AM
Nothing but a myth. I'm guessing this thread is nothing but a boast from a kid.

Michelangelo
12-30-2005, 09:44 AM
Not really related to tennis (but serious), after 2 to 3 times at night, I'd feel better the next day for school and work. Butta... masturbation just does the exactly the opposite. I have no clue.

Ripper
12-30-2005, 10:06 AM
Nothing but a myth. I'm guessing this thread is nothing but a boast from a kid.

Not a boast (on an internet forum?!). Not a kid. Just asking, that's all.

arnz
12-30-2005, 01:12 PM
May have a negative effect on tennis, but if I got some I probably wouldnt care about the tennis anyway:mrgreen:

Waimea_Boy
12-30-2005, 02:52 PM
It's not a myth, but it's different for everyone. There's no truth to the theory that you decrease your testosterone levels by having sex. If anything, your testosterone levels will actually rise a little the more sex that you have.

Some athletes prefer to have sex the night before a big competition to relax themselves and others feel the exact opposite.

Douggo
12-30-2005, 02:58 PM
May have a negative effect on tennis, but if I got some I probably wouldnt care about the tennis anyway:mrgreen:

My thoughts exactly! It's not like I'm going to pass on the opportunity... "no, honey, I've got a big match tomorrow with Jeff!"
Riiiiiiiiiiight. ;)

Ronaldo
12-30-2005, 03:11 PM
So like, what if you play everyday? Monk, nah

Skppr05
12-30-2005, 03:29 PM
maybe just a placebo effect? ehh, I don't know? when that happens to me I think about it when i play and it styas on the back of my mind the entire day. Dont sweat it

scotus
12-30-2005, 09:38 PM
Oscar de la Hoya said on Tonight Show a few years ago that he avoids it because it weakens his knees. Perhaps he goes the distance.

legolas
01-01-2006, 06:04 AM
it weakens my knees too, lol, but i still do it, im a horny dog. lol

Ronaldo
01-01-2006, 06:37 AM
A well I bless my soul
What’s wrong with me?
I’m itching like a man on a fuzzy tree
My friends say I’m actin’ wild as a bug
I had sex
I’m all shook up
Mm mm oh, oh, yeah, yeah!

My hands are shaky and my knees are weak
I can’t seem to stand on my own two feet
Who do you thank when you have such luck?
I had sex
I’m all shook up

pham4313
01-01-2006, 07:11 AM
sorry for asking but is it true that if you dont use it, you lose it ?? :confused: i am very concerned cuz its kinda subtle for many people.:confused:

a529612
01-01-2006, 07:30 AM
Scud Stud is the living example...

"Cash also commented that Philippoussis's active sex life had affected his career. The 1987 Wimbledon champion said Philippoussis spent the night before a match at the Australian Open in bed with Russian Anna Kournikova and celebrated reaching the semi-finals of the 1998 US Open by going to a strip club. "One of the trickiest problems I encountered was how do you tell a fit, eligible young man that it's probably not a good idea to spend the night with Anna Kournikova before a big match," Cash wrote.

The News of the World also focused on Philippoussis's sex life in an interview with former girlfriend Melanie Maudran, who said he insisted on having sex before matches, including just before going on to centre court at Wimbledon. "

http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2003/07/07/1057430137065.html

scez
01-01-2006, 04:50 PM
Didnt someone have a topic about how he pleasures himself right before tennis to make him play better?

Frodo Baggins
01-01-2006, 05:36 PM
http://www.theargonath.cc/characters/frodo/pictures/ffotrbilbos16.jpg*Thinks Your Nuts*http://www.theargonath.cc/characters/frodo/pictures/ffotrbilbos10.jpg(Imagin what I could do to my fave player);)

theace21
01-01-2006, 06:19 PM
I don't remember for sure if Yogi Berra said this, but the quote goes like this - it wasn't the sex that made you tired the next day, but staying out all night looking for it...

Muse
01-01-2006, 09:05 PM
Wow, sounds like someone is just bragging.

Ripper
01-03-2006, 10:01 AM
Wow, sounds like someone is just bragging.

Again, I'm not bragging, just asking. Normally, I never play in the mornings. So, I hadn't realized this. I guess, it depends, too... as everything.

Btw, I can have sex any time I want; I'm married! Well, almost any time; at least, when my wife and me are not ****ed at each other :mrgreen:

bluegrasser
01-03-2006, 02:42 PM
Wow ! any time you want - wait to you hit the middle age era - just on holidays and special occasions :)

hummer23
01-03-2006, 02:55 PM
I think its just a myth, if anything, i think its a possotive thing, gets your mind off of the pressure of the match.

MegacedU
01-03-2006, 03:10 PM
Frodo, you're creeping me out girl, total creepage.

And I mean that in the nicest way possible.

atatu
01-04-2006, 07:01 AM
Wow ! any time you want - wait to you hit the middle age era - just on holidays and special occasions :)

Yeah, birthday, fathers day, new years....that's about it....

Freedom
01-04-2006, 04:53 PM
I wouldn't mind.

In mixed doubles, wouldn't that strengthen team unity, anyway? Win-win situation!

ironchef21
01-05-2006, 01:05 PM
I don't know if it's scientifically proven to be detrimental, but some people believe it. For example, I've heard about soccer/football coaches who prohibited their players from having sex before big matches.

Geezer Guy
01-05-2006, 01:10 PM
Sure - why do you think those guys are grabbing each other's butts all the time? They're horney from not getting any!

KickServer
01-05-2006, 11:32 PM
I would recommend letting the women do all the work before an important match. No need to show your partner how much stamina you have, since you'll pay for it on the court the next day.

Geezer Guy
01-06-2006, 09:42 AM
Hmmm. So, the night before the big match, you send a callgirl to your opponents room! Heck, send over a couple of 6-packs as well.

It may cost you some money, but a win is a win, right?

chess9
01-07-2006, 11:35 AM
Having sex never affected my play. Not having sex has probably affected my play because I was probably a bit grumpy. :)

On a somewhat related note, a well-known triathlete coach suggests that all his clients have sex once a day or masturbate. His theory is that it stimulates the production of testosterone. I don't think much of the theory, but I love its application. :)

-Robert
________
Essential Vaaapp (http://essentialvaaappvaporizer.com)

ironchef21
01-09-2006, 10:54 AM
Hmmm. So, the night before the big match, you send a callgirl to your opponents room! Heck, send over a couple of 6-packs as well.

It may cost you some money, but a win is a win, right?

Lawrence Taylor used to hire "women-for-hire" to visit the hotel rooms of his opponents for this very purpose.

vkartikv
01-09-2006, 10:57 AM
You think you have a problem??? I hardly get any action, before a match or not!! :rolleyes:

Jonnyf
01-09-2006, 12:54 PM
eh well at least you guys are old enough to do it (wait a minute its legally)

MegacedU
01-09-2006, 01:00 PM
Lol Jonny - You could too, just not with someone older than you. Actually I don't really know the laws over there but I know the age of consent here, in NY is 17.

vkartikv
01-09-2006, 01:42 PM
eh well at least you guys are old enough to do it (wait a minute its legally)


If you havent shagged yet, you really dont know what you are missing, so you're fine - ignorance is bliss

Jonnyf
01-09-2006, 01:44 PM
age of consent is 16 in britain ( i believe) but im not counting that it's 1 year 9 months and 4 days. lol

vkartikv
01-09-2006, 01:50 PM
age of consent is 16 in britain ( i believe) but im not counting that it's 1 year 9 months and 4 days. lol


Regardless of your age, if you do not get consent from the other party, its called **** :p. And the police always take the side of the woman....

Jonnyf
01-09-2006, 01:58 PM
i know, what if the woman rapes the man ???? what if she held me at gunpoint asked for it, true story now the cops miget involved a hint NEVER FLUSH IT DOTHE TOILET IT BLOCKS OK

Rickson
01-09-2006, 02:02 PM
I used to think this was nothing but an old myth. Then, the other day, I did just that and wasn't feeling 100% the next morning, while playing tennis.
Well if you "arrived" 5 or 6 times, you'd probably feel drained, but if it was a one time "arrival", you shouldn't be effected at all.

Jonnyf
01-09-2006, 02:09 PM
rickson i think i know an adult site that you may like

vkartikv
01-09-2006, 02:12 PM
rickson i think i know an adult site that you may like


Rickson doesnt need adult sites, he gets hit on by other people's girlfriends all the time, he leads a very active life :)

Jonnyf
01-09-2006, 02:17 PM
maybe you'd like it vkartikv its good and free

vkartikv
01-09-2006, 02:28 PM
maybe you'd like it vkartikv its good and free

No thanks, I am turning into an ascetic :)

Docalex007
01-09-2006, 05:12 PM
I am waiting JonnyF. I am writing a research paper on this subject matter and would like the link to use as a reference source. :) LMAO. jk.

No, really, it wouldn't be a good idea to give such a link here.

Docalex007
01-09-2006, 05:13 PM
If you havent shagged yet, you really dont know what you are missing, so you're fine - ignorance is bliss

I concur with this statement.

Jonnyf
01-09-2006, 10:25 PM
dont worry id never post such aink here lol, but is good

Phil
01-09-2006, 11:34 PM
If you havent shagged yet, you really dont know what you are missing, so you're fine - ignorance is bliss

At Johnny's age I hadn't shagged yet and believe me, I was completely aware of what I was missing...

jonolau
01-10-2006, 12:06 AM
If you havent shagged yet, you really dont know what you are missing, so you're fine - ignorance is bliss
Yeah, keep it that way. Look what it got me - two kids along with a 3 year tennis ban ... but now I've got the GET OUR OF JAIL FREE card.

However, it's the cycle of life and I ain't complaining as they're beautiful kids. Now I'm trying to get my elder girl to learn tennis so that I can spend even more time on the courts!

goober
01-10-2006, 03:49 AM
Yeah, keep it that way. Look what it got me - two kids along with a 3 year tennis ban ... but now I've got the GET OUR OF JAIL FREE card.

However, it's the cycle of life and I ain't complaining as they're beautiful kids. Now I'm trying to get my elder girl to learn tennis so that I can spend even more time on the courts!


Whoa- your wife banned you from tennis for 3 years because you guys had kids? I have 2 small kids and a third about to come any day now. I pretty much told my wife you can have me fat and a couch potato or I am going to play tennis and exercise regularly. She has seen the chubby version of me so I get to play 3 days week.

jonolau
01-10-2006, 05:51 AM
Whoa- your wife banned you from tennis for 3 years because you guys had kids? I have 2 small kids and a third about to come any day now. I pretty much told my wife you can have me fat and a couch potato or I am going to play tennis and exercise regularly. She has seen the chubby version of me so I get to play 3 days week.
Yeah, try telling a pregnant lady who is the fat one around the house ... LOL.

Whatever you said above was spot on. I became a couch potato, one hand pasted to the TV remote, the other hand buried in a bag of chips ... somehow I managed to find the 15kgs my wife lost after she gave birth.

The scales tipped when I had trouble wearing all my work clothes ... whoa, change of wardrobe? Let's see:

15 pieces of underwear = $75
10 work shirts = $600
5 pairs of pants = $450
Being able to see my toes again? Priceless ...

Jonnyf
01-10-2006, 08:20 AM
At Johnny's age I hadn't shagged yet and believe me, I was completely aware of what I was missing...


Phil i completely agree with you (is that a first) im fully aware of what i am missing lol but im not going to get drunk and do something UNLESS the girl wants to lol and btw was it don that said (after someone metined that yonex wave grap sounded like a con*** advert and don said) "always play tennis with an overgip"

MonkeyPox
01-10-2006, 01:57 PM
It's not the sex, it's the lack of sleep. I say just start early, get some sleep and you're all the better for it.

VGP
01-10-2006, 06:16 PM
What kind of sex are we talking about?

30-50 steady minutes?

4-hour bang-a-thon?

knasty131
01-10-2006, 06:55 PM
i didnt read all the posts and im sorry if im repeating...but this is not a myth...boxers wont have sex for a week before a match if im not mistaken...it takes away testosterone which can produce more fight...in tennis that could result in you not being as aggressive and more or less playing not to lose rather than playing to win...

Geezer Guy
01-11-2006, 07:25 AM
Maybe that's Safin's problem. He seems to be the biggest playboy on the tour.

vkartikv
01-11-2006, 07:27 AM
What kind of sex are we talking about?

30-50 steady minutes?

4-hour bang-a-thon?


Just because one spends 4 hrs 'active' in bed does not mean he is banging the entire time he is there. Foreplay and afterplay are more exciting than the actual act...

goober
01-11-2006, 07:50 AM
What kind of sex are we talking about?

30-50 steady minutes?

4-hour bang-a-thon?


you left out the 1 minute wham-bam-thank you maam

Jack the Hack
01-11-2006, 10:51 AM
you left out the 1 minute wham-bam-thank you maam

Back when I was in college, we had a couple Australian guys on our tennis team. One of them used to tell dirty jokes all the time, and goober's comment reminded me of one of them (so that makes it tennis related, right?) :

Question: How do you know when a woman has had an orgasm?
Answer: Who the hell cares!?!?

(I can still hear that punchline spoken with a wild Aussie accent in my head - those guys were crazy.)

Jonnyf
01-11-2006, 11:10 AM
curtesy of Liam, do any of you know what an australian kiss is??. Thanks liam for the insight lol

Jack the Hack
01-11-2006, 12:20 PM
curtesy of Liam, do any of you know what an australian kiss is??. Thanks liam for the insight lol

Is it the same as a saltwater kiss? :cool:

(U2 fans might know that one.)

Rickson
01-11-2006, 12:35 PM
Rickson doesnt need adult sites, he gets hit on by other people's girlfriends all the time, he leads a very active life :)
Thanks for setting Johnny straight. My gf just moved upstate so I'm back on the prowl, but my friends' wives are still off limits, no matter how much they hit on me. ;)

Phil
01-11-2006, 06:58 PM
Thanks for setting Johnny straight. My gf just moved upstate so I'm back on the prowl, but my friends' wives are still off limits, no matter how much they hit on me. ;)

Ahhhhemmm...so, Rickson, you're saying that you're so irrisistable that your friends' wives hit on you left and right? Well this certainly doesn't surprise me (that you're saying this).

vkartikv
01-11-2006, 07:53 PM
Ahhhhemmm...so, Rickson, you're saying that you're so irrisistable that your friends' wives hit on you left and right? Well this certainly doesn't surprise me (that you're saying this).

They are not his friends, they are his 'boys' according to him...

Rickson
01-11-2006, 08:03 PM
Ahhhhemmm...so, Rickson, you're saying that you're so irrisistable that your friends' wives hit on you left and right? Well this certainly doesn't surprise me (that you're saying this).
No, Philip, one friend's wife got drunk and made some moves, but I resisted because despite what some people say, I'm a man of morals.

Phil
01-11-2006, 08:27 PM
No, Philip, one friend's wife got drunk and made some moves, but I resisted because despite what some people say, I'm a man of morals.

So it was ONE friend's WIFE, not your "friends wives..."-as in more than one? And she was drunk, so yeah, I'll buy that. After all, she was drunk! But, seriously, I would not have hit it either-I value friendship over cheap, impulsive sex. Then again, it may depend on how good a friend he really is...

MegacedU
01-12-2006, 11:56 AM
I'm sure at one point or another someone else's wife has made moves on our Rickson here.

Jonnyf
01-12-2006, 12:17 PM
Is it the same as a saltwater kiss? :cool:

(U2 fans might know that one.)

Duno wat a saltwater kiss is lol

Dedans Penthouse
01-12-2006, 02:13 PM
pssst....allow me to interupt the 10 cent/dimestore cyber-braggin' for a second. I'll hand the post back to the "they can't keep their hands off me" gods and the upstate girls who (surprisingly to me) actually find heavy-handed "me-isms" as...... er......smoo-o-ooth? (smirk-wink!)

Anyway...moving on to the "kiss/no-tell" curriculum, i.e:
those who say, don't know
and those who know, don't say.....

Johnny F and the "youngins" ...... pull up a chair and let's talk--better yet, step into my office:

Scenario: You're finally alone with the girl you've been dreaming about. You actually make love with her; what a night!.....she's ends up "seeing God" again and again...and you don't know whether you're coming or going--it's all more than you could've hoped for.

Now, a couple of options to consider:

OPTION #1 (don't!).You could "impress" your friends and be a big shot (little dick) by "chirping" to them the next day about the previous evening's proceedings and in doing so, put yourself at the mercy of one of your "friends" turning around and trying to get into their favor by ratting on you; saying (in detail) what you told them. In short: shut your trap and say nothing to them. If you do so, you more than risk "drying up" that fountain, because the girl (and her friends--more on "her friends" later) will want to have nothing to do with you. As a result of you "compromising" her personal dignity, she in turn, may try to get back at you by describing her evening with you as one "small" exercise in utter frustration....i.e. johnny is a "one-note" i.e. 60 seconds-one-and-done.....johnny can't kiss worth a lick (pun intended), etc. :razz:

OPTION #2. "Kiss-but-don't-tell" is the golden rule. She'll appreciate you for that. But why stop there.....why not set your sights not only on "Janey" but her friends as well???? :cool:

---now for the fun part:

OPTION #3. Start looking at the big picture. The "big picture" includes not only the girl herself...but all her friends as well. Think in terms of cultivating or developing a "sustainable" environment. One that yields many crops...and over a protracted period of time. I'm going to give you a Dedans Penthouse, Chapter One "basic" example. You can set your sights low, be the good boy and employ option #2 above ("kiss-no-tell") and the girl will be appreciative and her friends will like and respect you for it. BUT will her friends WANT you for it? Nope--they'll view you instead as that girl's "good guy" -- period. That is, they'll only look at you as a potential "friend." Now, do you want to settle for their "respect" or would you rather they WANTED YOU? Why then limit yourself to just that one girl? Be the c0ck o' the flock! To continue the "Chaper One" example, here's a shrewd mindset type approach you might want to consider (there are many but in the interest of time):

First off, there's a song entitled "Girls Talk" that begins with the lyrics:
"there are some things you can't cover up with lipstick and powder....
did I hear you sayin' my name, can't you talk any louder?...."

The fact is: girls do talk--now, what about it? Well, if for example, they slyly ask you "Hey Johnny?...what happened with Janey last night?" Now, you can't play "the good guy" and coyly reply: "er...nothing." Technically, you're off the hook, but they know that you're playing footsie with them and not giving them a straight answer. That is, you're may NOT be actually "outing" their friend Janey, but they'll know you're bull*****ting them and that's almost as lame as spilling the beans. Technically, you're not being a "kiss-and-tell" bum, but you are being a wimp. And that "good guy" approach won't cut it here. Girls (crazy girls) like the "bad" in boys as well. Now: here's where you need to be confidently sly enough to be willing to lose the battle in the interest of WINNING THE WAR:

When those same girls ask: "Hey Johnny, what happened?....We heard that you two were whooooo!" Now, instead of "playing possum" and simply saying that nothing happened, you should then take that "nothing happened" b.s. reply to ANOTHER LEVEL--tell them (in you most fake/sincere voice, tinged with a touch of regret): "Look, I'm not going to lie to you guys(girls)--I did want to kiss her and then some, but she let me kiss her goodnight....and that was it.....period!" Hell, while you're at it, you can say the same thing to your "guy" friends as well if they ask you....it'll probably find its way back to the girls anyway---that way, you'll be killing two birds with one "b.s." stone.

Let yourself look like "Mr. I Was Shot Down." Here's what the deal is: HER FRIENDS ARE PROBABLY TESTING YOU ON WHAT YOUR ANSWER WILL BE-- JANEY'S FRIENDS PROBABLY ALREADY KNOW WHAT THE DEAL WAS---JANEY PROBABLY ALREADY (locker room) TOLD THEM: what kind of kisser (good or bad) you were, etc.. And if Janey didn't want to give them/tell them the full "monty" for fear of making herself sound like a 1st time sluutinsky, no problem---the girls now KNOW that not only DIDN'T you spill the beans, but that you took it ONE STEP FURTHER AND "TOOK THE BULLET" as well. THEY'LL SEE YOU AS SLY FOX WHO IS DOUBLEY-SAFE BECAUSE YOU "TOOK ONE ON THE CHIN FOR THE TEAM." They'll know you're bullsh1ting them--but they'll love that "bad boy/good boy" slyness in you. There's a difference between a "fox" and a "rat." They'll now see you as more than just "kiss-no-tell." That is, they're not only appreciative of the fact that you didn't "out" their friend Janey, they'll want you for themselves "on the sly--on the side" because they're now confident that you won't "out" them either and that you were confident enough to post a "I got shot down" picture to the world.....while in real life you quietly are setting the trap ..... for them. They'll be thinking: "hmmm, I want a CONFIDENTIAL taste of that confidential banana tree."

Always remember (or at least always error on the side of caution and assume that): GIRLS TALK-period! Use that to your advantage. Play it to the hilt, why settle for doing just one? Get the flock to come to you, Mr. Safe-and-Secure. One other thing: slowww down, cowboy and don't be a slobbering "Frenching sword fighter" right out of the box. Ok Johnny F: it'll be soon when you are "of age" ...... now go practice "flying" in the mirror with your "I got shot down" sly little trap. Btw, here's a nice flourish or touch if you will: pretending to be slightly bashful and/or embarrassed in response to their "what happened?" question is a good way to "set the bait" with your "I got shot down" b.s. answer--you're now coming across as trying to be so-o-o sincere. They'll think "what a smooth bad, bad, bad boy!" :-)

You will be (sexually) tapping into their mothering instincts. Take the proverbial bullet.....play wounded......and then watch them tripping over themselves while rushing to (ah-hem) "mother you" with affection, to come to your aid; to attend-to-you .... "oh Johnny....poor Johnny.....so Janey shot you down, did she?....oh....oh.....poor Johnny....I'll make you (and me) feel better..." This is a less sick variation of the Fawn Libowitz "I shouldn't be alone tonight" trick played in the movie Animal House. Different but duplicitous just the same. And, while you're screwing your brains out--screw the guilt as well and remember the my uncle, ol' Uncle Bottom Line Penthouse's motto: a standing schlong has no conscience.

Oh did this and a host of others work like a charm when I was your age ...... sigh...... (major smirk)

Jonnyf
01-12-2006, 02:26 PM
pssst....allow me to interupt the 10 cent/dimestore cyber-braggin' for a second. I'll hand the post back to the "they can't keep their hands off me" gods and the upstate girls who (surprisingly to me) actually find heavy-handed "me-isms" as...... er......smoo-o-ooth? (smirk-wink!)

Anyway...moving on to the "kiss/no-tell" curriculum, i.e:
those who say, don't know
and those who know, don't say.....

Johnny F and the "youngins" ...... pull up a chair and let's talk--better yet, step into my office:

Scenario: You're finally alone with the girl you've been dreaming about. You actually make love with her; what a night!.....she's ends up "seeing God" again and again...and you don't know whether you're coming or going--it's all more than you could've hoped for.

Now, a couple of options to consider:

OPTION #1 (don't!).You could "impress" your friends and be a big shot (little dick) by "chirping" to them the next day about the previous evening's proceedings and in doing so, put yourself at the mercy of one of your "friends" turning around and trying to get into their favor by ratting on you; saying (in detail) what you told them. In short: shut your trap and say nothing to them. If you do so, you more than risk "drying up" that fountain, because the girl (and her friends--more on "her friends" later) will want to have nothing to do with you. As a result of you "compromising" her personal dignity, she in turn, may try to get back at you by describing her evening with you as one "small" exercise in utter frustration....i.e. johnny is a "one-note" i.e. 60 seconds-one-and-done.....johnny can't kiss worth a lick (pun intended), etc. :razz:

OPTION #2. "Kiss-but-don't-tell" is the golden rule. She'll appreciate you for that. But why stop there.....why not set your sights not only on "Janey" but her friends as well???? :cool:

---now for the fun part:

OPTION #3. Start looking at the big picture. The "big picture" includes not only the girl herself...but all her friends as well. Think in terms of cultivating or developing a "sustainable" environment. One that yields many crops...and over a protracted period of time. I'm going to give you a Dedans Penthouse, Chapter One "basic" example. You can set your sights low, be the good boy and employ option #2 above ("kiss-no-tell") and the girl will be appreciative and her friends will like and respect you for it. BUT will her friends WANT you for it? Nope--they'll view you instead as that girl's "good guy" -- period. That is, they'll only look at you as a potential "friend." Now, do you want to settle for their "respect" or would you rather they WANTED YOU? Why then limit yourself to just that one girl? Be the c0ck o' the flock! To continue the "Chaper One" example, here's a shrewd mindset type approach you might want to consider (there are many but in the interest of time):

First off, there's a song entitled "Girls Talk" that begins with the lyrics:
"there are some things you can't cover up with lipstick and powder....
did I hear you sayin' my name, can't you talk any louder?...."

The fact is: girls do talk--now, what about it? Well, if for example, they slyly ask you "Hey Johnny?...what happened with Janey last night?" Now, you can't play "the good guy" and coyly reply: "er...nothing." Technically, you're off the hook, but they know that you're playing footsie with them and not giving them a straight answer. That is, you're may NOT be actually "outing" their friend Janey, but they'll know you're bull*****ting them and that's almost as lame as spilling the beans. Technically, you're not being a "kiss-and-tell" bum, but you are being a wimp. And that "good guy" approach won't cut it here. Girls (crazy girls) like the "bad" in boys as well. Now: here's where you need to be confidently sly enough to be willing to lose the battle in the interest of WINNING THE WAR:

When those same girls ask: "Hey Johnny, what happened?....We heard that you two were whooooo!" Now, instead of "playing possum" and simply saying that nothing happened, you should then take that "nothing happened" b.s. reply to ANOTHER LEVEL--tell them (in you most fake/sincere voice, tinged with a touch of regret): "Look, I'm not going to lie to you guys(girls)--I did want to kiss her and then some, but she let me kiss her goodnight....and that was it.....period!" Hell, while you're at it, you can say the same thing to your "guy" friends as well if they ask you....it'll probably find its way back to the girls anyway---that way, you'll be killing two birds with one "b.s." stone.

Let yourself look like "Mr. I Was Shot Down." Here's what the deal is: HER FRIENDS ARE PROBABLY TESTING YOU ON WHAT YOUR ANSWER WILL BE-- JANEY'S FRIENDS PROBABLY ALREADY KNOW WHAT THE DEAL WAS---JANEY PROBABLY ALREADY (locker room) TOLD THEM: what kind of kisser (good or bad) you were, etc.. And if Janey didn't want to give them/tell them the full "monty" for fear of making herself sound like a 1st time sluutinsky, no problem---the girls now KNOW that not only DIDN'T you spill the beans, but that you took it ONE STEP FURTHER AND "TOOK THE BULLET" as well. THEY'LL SEE YOU AS SLY FOX WHO IS DOUBLEY-SAFE BECAUSE YOU "TOOK ONE ON THE CHIN FOR THE TEAM." They'll know you're bullsh1ting them--but they'll love that "bad boy/good boy" slyness in you. There's a difference between a "fox" and a "rat." They'll now see you as more than just "kiss-no-tell." That is, they're not only appreciative of the fact that you didn't "out" their friend Janey, they'll want you for themselves "on the sly--on the side" because they're now confident that you won't "out" them either and that you were confident enough to post a "I got shot down" picture to the world.....while in real life you quietly are setting the trap ..... for them. They'll be thinking: "hmmm, I want a CONFIDENTIAL taste of that confidential banana tree."

Always remember (or at least always error on the side of caution and assume that): GIRLS TALK-period! Use that to your advantage. Play it to the hilt, why settle for doing just one? Get the flock to come to you, Mr. Safe-and-Secure. One other thing: slowww down, cowboy and don't be a slobbering "Frenching sword fighter" right out of the box. Ok Johnny F: it'll be soon when you are "of age" ...... now go practice "flying" in the mirror with your "I got shot down" sly little trap. Btw, here's a nice flourish or touch if you will: pretending to be slightly bashful and/or embarrassed in response to their "what happened?" question is a good way to "set the bait" with your "I got shot down" b.s. answer--you're now coming across as trying to be so-o-o sincere. They'll think "what a smooth bad, bad, bad boy!" :-)

You will be (sexually) tapping into their mothering instincts. Take the proverbial bullet.....play wounded......and then watch them tripping over themselves while rushing to (ah-hem) "mother you" with affection, to come to your aid; to attend-to-you .... "oh Johnny....poor Johnny.....so Janey shot you down, did she?....oh....oh.....poor Johnny....I'll make you (and me) feel better..." This is a less sick variation of the Fawn Libowitz "I shouldn't be alone tonight" trick played in the movie Animal House. Different but duplicitous just the same. And, while you're screwing your brains out--screw the guilt as well and remember the my uncle, ol' Uncle Bottom Line Penthouse's motto: a standing schlong has no conscience.

Oh did this and a host of others work like a charm when I was your age ...... sigh...... (major smirk)



Ahh where to start first of all roflmao honestly i think i just broke several electrical goods and the wood on the underside of the bed laughing. Uncle Penthouse, whats a schlong lol j/k. I didn't get half of the first half but i did get the second and btw just as an fyi i aint the arse*ole you may think i am. id gladly take a bullet anywhere (but not a bullet shaped object behind me (if you catch my drift)) now if you dont mid i need to pack my schoolbag.

jax11213
01-12-2006, 03:40 PM
thank you dr. phil

Rickson
01-12-2006, 04:52 PM
DP, funny you should mention this. I introduced a very stupid girl with too much pride to an equally stupid guy. The girl and I hung out on a few occasions, but that all ended when she insisted on playing phone games. She asked me to call her constantly, but I won't call girls who don't call me. Out of anger, she told the male friend that I wanted a piece of her badly, but she shot me down. She went on to ask him not to tell me anything, but the fool couldn't resist attempting to rip on me. I told him that she was lying because she was angry that I wouldn't call her. The fool attempted to cover for her by saying he was just kidding, but I told him that they were both idiots because you don't confide in people you know less than the one who introduced you. The answer to your mini quiz; don't open your mouth, especially to people who know the person you slept with. In my case, it's even worse because the girl lied, but the most ridiculous part was how this foolish girl thought she could trust this idiot not to open his mouth. Lesson: never talk badly about someone to a person he or she introduced you to; you'll get burned by that person for sure.

lambert
01-12-2006, 07:20 PM
i think that's a myth! you can have s** the whole night and feel better the next day! maybe it's you that's having a problem. your body resistance! if you haven't had some work outs done, then that's eat! depends also on what food you eat!

jonolau
01-12-2006, 07:31 PM
i think that's a myth! you can have s** the whole night and feel better the next day! maybe it's you that's having a problem. your body resistance! if you haven't had some work outs done, then that's eat! depends also on what food you eat!
I heard that oysters help ...

fishuuuuu
01-12-2006, 08:13 PM
I heard that oysters help ...

They are not an aphrodesiac contrary to popular belief.

jonolau
01-12-2006, 08:31 PM
They are not an aphrodesiac contrary to popular belief.
I know. Chinese medicine also considers the following to be aphrodisiacs:

Deers' horn
Tiger penises
Bear testicles

Then there's also Spanish fly ...

As far as I'm concerned, not having a headache is the best aphrodisiac ... but try telling that to the wife ... ;)

vkartikv
01-13-2006, 06:29 AM
I know. Chinese medicine also considers the following to be aphrodisiacs:

Deers' horn
Tiger penises
Bear testicles

Then there's also Spanish fly ...

As far as I'm concerned, not having a headache is the best aphrodisiac ... but try telling that to the wife ... ;)


Poor tiger, sacrificing its own penis to make another's erect...

Dedans Penthouse
01-13-2006, 07:04 AM
johnnf: I never hinted that you were an a*hole. Where did you get that in my previous post? Au contraire lad, I was only affectionately (and playfully) offering some "older brother" advice. Actually, if it'll make you feel better, just take the whole thing with a grain of salt (most if not all of my "non-tennis" post for that matter). Not a problem.

Rickson: You've were bit by the "girl-with-a-grudge" tattling falsehoods to her "friend" (two stupid birds of the same feather indeed). But since your (and her) problem appeared to stem from a difference of opinion as to whether picking up a phone was always a guy-only responsibility (you viewing it as a "two-way" street), the problem in my opinion was not the difference of opinion between you two, but that it wasn't nipped-in-the-bud and dealt with upfront without involving that other blabbermouth. That is, you and she might've sat down (yeah make the first call if only to schedule a sit down "pow-wow") and hammered it out without her coping some vengeful attitude--and even, worse, involving that other big mouth. In short, she unfortunately took it personally--she misinterpreted your "opinion" regarding intitiating phone calls as a personal slight against her. If she could've agreed to hammering it out and coming to some sort of a agreement (even agreeing to disagree and leave it at that, in a quiet, non-confrontational manner), that might've left her thinking: "Maybe I still don't agree with you Rickson, but I respect your right to your opinion and I'm not going to hang you out to dry with 3-party fictional gossip." She mistakenly interpreted your rightful opinion as an afront to her personal pride. As it turns out, you did right by taking that hook out of that "fish's" mouth and tossing it (her) back into the ocean. Who'd want to bother with that "story-telling" nut?...sigh.

As to my "mini quiz" (to be honest), my previous post to the "youngins' wasn't really a quiz. Yes, there were "options" but I already thought the "kiss-but-DON'T-tell" advice was a given, upfront. I was simply trying to suggest to johnnf (and the other 'youngins') that you could take the "DON'T TELL" advice to another level. That is, "pretend that you got shot down" and let her girl friends:

a. know you are fibbing on behalf of their "sister" friend,
b. yet, PRETEND not to know that they know

that is, you're workin' the "girls talk" angle and (devilishly) using it to your advantage :evil:

Her friends come to the conclusion that not only do you NOT "kiss-and-tell" but you actually go about painting a "he tried, but he didn't get to 1st base with me!" picture on her behalf. THAT'S where the "on the side" offers (from HER friends) come from (wink!). But yeah, I know what you mean: before employing any devilish "schemes" it's alway a tried a true gospel tenet to never kiss-and-tell.

jax11213: what was with the "thank you Dr. Phil" crack? First off, I ain't bald, ugly or fat and my accent is harly provincial. Dr. Phil??...This is hardly what would constitute as "family-values" advice. Maybe I read your comment wrong and that you weren't taking a pot shot.....whatever. If so? Bring it! :-)

[b] I know. Chinese medicine also considers the following to be aphrodisiacs:
deers' horn
tiger penises
bear testicles
Bear testicles??? In China they have those Panda Bears. And since it seems that those PANDA BEARS are the hardest species to try to get to mate with each other, then "Chinese Bear Balls" would be the last thing I'd want on my love plate menu. As for "tiger-beat-meat".... I think I'll pass on that one too (wink!); I make wee-wee, I don't take wee-wee. Btw, do they serve this in 5-star restaurants in the Celestial Kingdom? "Er, waiter?...what are this evening's specials?" YIKES!!! As far as Deer Horn, I think Deerhorn is a town in Michigan, no?

I always thought 'legs-spread-wide' to be a good aphrodisiac :-)

But the best aphrodisiac? With slightly narrowed eyes and the faintest of smiles: that "held for..just an extra moment look" exchanged across a crowded room. Ummm......

jonolau
01-13-2006, 08:09 AM
Ahh, Dedans, you learn more? Me teach you more. Chinese, we have plenty ancient remedies make pecker knock on wood. Everything you see around forest make anscestors proud of family jewels. Also only choose animal parts that can make special wanton soup ...

Deer antlers - get the point?
Tiger penis - lost the point.
Bear testicles - well, he too slow and get kicked around.

You also very wise man ... panda bear, NO GOOD! Too slow, put two in cage 10 years, still only count two. Best part come from Moon Bear. No no, he no show white buttocks, he like to stare at moon.

;)

equinox
01-13-2006, 09:27 AM
Australian kiss?

Here goes my take..

Us Aussie blokes are **** poor at shaving, frequently will have few days old stubble growing on our chins. This makes us look all rugged and outbackish.

Now when we go down on a sheila, we'll quickly look upwards to help gauge her reactions. In the process we accidentally brush her more sensitive parts with our stubbled chin. This will send her into heavenly bliss, thus we blokes have dubbed this maneuver the "Aussie kiss", etc..

Jonnyf
01-13-2006, 09:31 AM
not what Liam said but funny enough lol

Frodo Baggins
01-13-2006, 09:31 AM
Never gonna understand Meg? When I say Imagin what I could do to my fave players>(Meg says your creeping me out!!) But Then she turns around an says she wanna TAPS Roddick!! So What does thaT say?? She can Tap roddick But I can't jump my faves?? Sheesh!!!

Rickson
01-13-2006, 09:34 AM
Dedans, I totally underestimated your knowledge of women. Next time I need some girl tips, I'm asking you. BTW, I did make the intitial phone call because she asked me to call her before our movie date. The girl cancelled on me the morning of, citing a trip to the accountant and I told her that I have no problem with the cancellation, I have a problem with her waiting for me to call in order to cancel when she had 3 days to let me know. I never called her again despite her efforts to have me call her, but if she can't pick up the phone for me, I won't do it for her.

norcal
01-13-2006, 10:15 AM
Back when I was in college, we had a couple Australian guys on our tennis team. One of them used to tell dirty jokes all the time, and goober's comment reminded me of one of them (so that makes it tennis related, right?) :

Question: How do you know when a woman has had an orgasm?
Answer: Who the hell cares!?!?

(I can still hear that punchline spoken with a wild Aussie accent in my head - those guys were crazy.) That's funny it must be an Aussie thing. An Aussie friend of mine told me this one:
What is the difference between a golf ball and a g spot?


A man will spend hours looking for a golf ball!

MegacedU
01-13-2006, 11:51 AM
Frodo - Whaaaaaaaaaaat? You're allowed to do what? Believe me, I'm not going to dictate who you hit the sack with.

DP - I don't think me-isms are smooth. Here in Utica, we frown on the guys who share to much. If they do, we share the weath of information as well and perhaps we enhance it, just a bit. Thus, proving option one to be a huge dont. This isn't my thread, I've posted in it, what, twice?

jhhachamp
02-10-2006, 02:47 PM
Back when I was in college, we had a couple Australian guys on our tennis team. One of them used to tell dirty jokes all the time, and goober's comment reminded me of one of them (so that makes it tennis related, right?) :

Question: How do you know when a woman has had an orgasm?
Answer: Who the hell cares!?!?

(I can still hear that punchline spoken with a wild Aussie accent in my head - those guys were crazy.)

Another one I've heard:

Q: What is the definition of making love?

A: Something a woman does while the guy is f*cking her

J-man
02-17-2006, 06:09 PM
I used to think this was nothing but an old myth. Then, the other day, I did just that and wasn't feeling 100% the next morning, while playing tennis.just don't do it before you play:D

thewisteron
02-18-2006, 01:56 PM
Personally, I am all ready to play the morning after.:D

vkartikv
02-18-2006, 02:03 PM
I think hot sweaty sex is great.

MegacedU
02-18-2006, 03:37 PM
It must make up for the workout you don't get during tennis - yeah? :)

cruise30166
02-18-2006, 05:46 PM
Definitely, have sex the night before.
And have sex in the morning.
Then go play tennis or whatever....
Keep you priorities straight.

Frodo Baggins
02-19-2006, 11:31 AM
Like I Said Oh Do Tell..:rolleyes:

bc-05
02-20-2006, 07:01 AM
hmm never really noticed it.. im pretty sure it doesnt really affect me.. like u just forget about it in the morning.. but oh well

35ft6
02-20-2006, 07:13 AM
I used to think this was nothing but an old myth. Then, the other day, I did just that and wasn't feeling 100% the next morning, while playing tennis. Yeah, I think it's a myth. Really, what you're posting is a cause and effect problem. You happened to not feel great and you're blaming sex, discounting the fact that you probably feel terrible sometimes with sex nowhere in sight. I have a friend who always says "lets go to a bar, it's a full moon out!" He insists people act crazier. I've never noticed.

evw
02-23-2006, 01:41 PM
The US Olympic Committee addressed this issue a couple of Olympics ago. They recommended 30 minutes of sexual activity the night before a performance event. The USOC conducted a study that found that 30 minutes would relax an athlete actually promoting a sounder and more revitalizing sleep. While activity beyond 30 minutes resulted in fatigue the following day and reduced athletic performance.

So watch the clock and you'll have a smile before and after your match.

courtrage
02-26-2006, 05:38 AM
The US Olympic Committee addressed this issue a couple of Olympics ago. They recommended 30 minutes of sexual activity the night before a performance event. The USOC conducted a study that found that 30 minutes would relax an athlete actually promoting a sounder and more revitalizing sleep. While activity beyond 30 minutes resulted in fatigue the following day and reduced athletic performance.

So watch the clock and you'll have a smile before and after your match.

30 minutes!?! why in that time, i could have sex 15 times :-D

celo007
02-27-2006, 09:08 AM
hahah my people, yall are some freaks, anybody going to the club this weekend in the southern california area? i heard that tennis players are some freaks. prove it people, if you wanna go, message me. PEACE!

Janne
05-01-2006, 12:37 PM
Don't think that sex has any effect :P

wyutani
05-01-2006, 05:26 PM
Don't think that sex has any effect :P

it does mate'...it makes the legs weak...probably couldnt run...hmm....:rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Freedom
05-01-2006, 05:28 PM
30 minutes!?! why in that time, i could have sex 15 times :-D


:D Oh sad...

doriancito
05-01-2006, 06:33 PM
also masturbation....

ProStaffTour90
05-01-2006, 07:19 PM
Definitely, have sex the night before.
And have sex in the morning.
Then go play tennis or whatever....
Keep you priorities straighht.

haha, exactly!

unless your playing some ATP event or a Satelite, take the sex while you can lol.

otherwise it's probably best if you take it easy the night before. Although, i have heard emptying the old testes manually before a hit has a positive effect :-| lol.

Capt. Willie
05-01-2006, 07:31 PM
This is why I prefer "cowgirl". Let her do all the work...and you don't have to worry about your knees. ;)

ProStaffTour90
05-01-2006, 07:42 PM
lol captain

exactly, you've got to eliminate the wobbly leg effect :lol:

Janne
05-02-2006, 06:52 AM
it does mate'...it makes the legs weak...probably couldnt run...hmm....:rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Guess it varies from people to people then :D

Ammo
05-03-2006, 08:46 AM
mabe ripper was having sex wit himself and therefore his arm/hand was too tired!:mrgreen:

kevhen
05-03-2006, 08:50 AM
I stayed up most of the night with a woman and then played tired tennis the next day. We didn't have sex, but spending time with a woman can be exhausting....

Ripper
05-03-2006, 10:11 AM
mabe ripper was having sex wit himself and therefore his arm/hand was too tired!:mrgreen:

Hadn't visited this thread in quite a while, but I see it's still going, lol...

Hummm, lately, I do, almost, everything with my left arm and hand, just to save my right one for tennis. Computer mouse, door knobs, carrying stuff, etc. I know; I'm nuts. Anyway, maybe, you just gave me an idea of something else I should be doing with my left hand :mrgreen:

Ripper
05-03-2006, 10:18 AM
I stayed up most of the night with a woman and then played tired tennis the next day. We didn't have sex, but spending time with a woman can be exhausting....

Making our or just listening to the never ending bla bla bla?

kingwilson
07-09-2006, 02:33 PM
not what Liam said but funny enough lol

Poor sexually frustrated Jonny. You don't have a hope.

Do you know what a rubber Johnny is lmao

Docalex007
07-09-2006, 02:40 PM
Did somebody say "SEX"? :neutral:

Jonnyf
07-09-2006, 02:42 PM
Poor sexually frustrated Jonny. You don't have a hope.

Do you know what a rubber Johnny is lmao


Nah im removing it, its just too easy to reply to that post


OH also you bumped a thread for the most pathetic attempt at ripping me (sarcastic clap)

tonyjh63
07-09-2006, 03:47 PM
Actually, I find that long-term lack of sex is really bad for my tennis game!<G>

hgb765
07-09-2006, 05:16 PM
pssst....allow me to interupt the 10 cent/dimestore cyber-braggin' for a second. I'll hand the post back to the "they can't keep their hands off me" gods and the upstate girls who (surprisingly to me) actually find heavy-handed "me-isms" as...... er......smoo-o-ooth? (smirk-wink!)

Anyway...moving on to the "kiss/no-tell" curriculum, i.e:
those who say, don't know
and those who know, don't say.....

Johnny F and the "youngins" ...... pull up a chair and let's talk--better yet, step into my office:

Scenario: You're finally alone with the girl you've been dreaming about. You actually make love with her; what a night!.....she's ends up "seeing God" again and again...and you don't know whether you're coming or going--it's all more than you could've hoped for.

Now, a couple of options to consider:

OPTION #1 (don't!).You could "impress" your friends and be a big shot (little dick) by "chirping" to them the next day about the previous evening's proceedings and in doing so, put yourself at the mercy of one of your "friends" turning around and trying to get into their favor by ratting on you; saying (in detail) what you told them. In short: shut your trap and say nothing to them. If you do so, you more than risk "drying up" that fountain, because the girl (and her friends--more on "her friends" later) will want to have nothing to do with you. As a result of you "compromising" her personal dignity, she in turn, may try to get back at you by describing her evening with you as one "small" exercise in utter frustration....i.e. johnny is a "one-note" i.e. 60 seconds-one-and-done.....johnny can't kiss worth a lick (pun intended), etc. :razz:

OPTION #2. "Kiss-but-don't-tell" is the golden rule. She'll appreciate you for that. But why stop there.....why not set your sights not only on "Janey" but her friends as well???? :cool:

---now for the fun part:

OPTION #3. Start looking at the big picture. The "big picture" includes not only the girl herself...but all her friends as well. Think in terms of cultivating or developing a "sustainable" environment. One that yields many crops...and over a protracted period of time. I'm going to give you a Dedans Penthouse, Chapter One "basic" example. You can set your sights low, be the good boy and employ option #2 above ("kiss-no-tell") and the girl will be appreciative and her friends will like and respect you for it. BUT will her friends WANT you for it? Nope--they'll view you instead as that girl's "good guy" -- period. That is, they'll only look at you as a potential "friend." Now, do you want to settle for their "respect" or would you rather they WANTED YOU? Why then limit yourself to just that one girl? Be the c0ck o' the flock! To continue the "Chaper One" example, here's a shrewd mindset type approach you might want to consider (there are many but in the interest of time):

First off, there's a song entitled "Girls Talk" that begins with the lyrics:
"there are some things you can't cover up with lipstick and powder....
did I hear you sayin' my name, can't you talk any louder?...."

The fact is: girls do talk--now, what about it? Well, if for example, they slyly ask you "Hey Johnny?...what happened with Janey last night?" Now, you can't play "the good guy" and coyly reply: "er...nothing." Technically, you're off the hook, but they know that you're playing footsie with them and not giving them a straight answer. That is, you're may NOT be actually "outing" their friend Janey, but they'll know you're bull*****ting them and that's almost as lame as spilling the beans. Technically, you're not being a "kiss-and-tell" bum, but you are being a wimp. And that "good guy" approach won't cut it here. Girls (crazy girls) like the "bad" in boys as well. Now: here's where you need to be confidently sly enough to be willing to lose the battle in the interest of WINNING THE WAR:

When those same girls ask: "Hey Johnny, what happened?....We heard that you two were whooooo!" Now, instead of "playing possum" and simply saying that nothing happened, you should then take that "nothing happened" b.s. reply to ANOTHER LEVEL--tell them (in you most fake/sincere voice, tinged with a touch of regret): "Look, I'm not going to lie to you guys(girls)--I did want to kiss her and then some, but she let me kiss her goodnight....and that was it.....period!" Hell, while you're at it, you can say the same thing to your "guy" friends as well if they ask you....it'll probably find its way back to the girls anyway---that way, you'll be killing two birds with one "b.s." stone.

Let yourself look like "Mr. I Was Shot Down." Here's what the deal is: HER FRIENDS ARE PROBABLY TESTING YOU ON WHAT YOUR ANSWER WILL BE-- JANEY'S FRIENDS PROBABLY ALREADY KNOW WHAT THE DEAL WAS---JANEY PROBABLY ALREADY (locker room) TOLD THEM: what kind of kisser (good or bad) you were, etc.. And if Janey didn't want to give them/tell them the full "monty" for fear of making herself sound like a 1st time sluutinsky, no problem---the girls now KNOW that not only DIDN'T you spill the beans, but that you took it ONE STEP FURTHER AND "TOOK THE BULLET" as well. THEY'LL SEE YOU AS SLY FOX WHO IS DOUBLEY-SAFE BECAUSE YOU "TOOK ONE ON THE CHIN FOR THE TEAM." They'll know you're bullsh1ting them--but they'll love that "bad boy/good boy" slyness in you. There's a difference between a "fox" and a "rat." They'll now see you as more than just "kiss-no-tell." That is, they're not only appreciative of the fact that you didn't "out" their friend Janey, they'll want you for themselves "on the sly--on the side" because they're now confident that you won't "out" them either and that you were confident enough to post a "I got shot down" picture to the world.....while in real life you quietly are setting the trap ..... for them. They'll be thinking: "hmmm, I want a CONFIDENTIAL taste of that confidential banana tree."

Always remember (or at least always error on the side of caution and assume that): GIRLS TALK-period! Use that to your advantage. Play it to the hilt, why settle for doing just one? Get the flock to come to you, Mr. Safe-and-Secure. One other thing: slowww down, cowboy and don't be a slobbering "Frenching sword fighter" right out of the box. Ok Johnny F: it'll be soon when you are "of age" ...... now go practice "flying" in the mirror with your "I got shot down" sly little trap. Btw, here's a nice flourish or touch if you will: pretending to be slightly bashful and/or embarrassed in response to their "what happened?" question is a good way to "set the bait" with your "I got shot down" b.s. answer--you're now coming across as trying to be so-o-o sincere. They'll think "what a smooth bad, bad, bad boy!" :-)

You will be (sexually) tapping into their mothering instincts. Take the proverbial bullet.....play wounded......and then watch them tripping over themselves while rushing to (ah-hem) "mother you" with affection, to come to your aid; to attend-to-you .... "oh Johnny....poor Johnny.....so Janey shot you down, did she?....oh....oh.....poor Johnny....I'll make you (and me) feel better..." This is a less sick variation of the Fawn Libowitz "I shouldn't be alone tonight" trick played in the movie Animal House. Different but duplicitous just the same. And, while you're screwing your brains out--screw the guilt as well and remember the my uncle, ol' Uncle Bottom Line Penthouse's motto: a standing schlong has no conscience.

Oh did this and a host of others work like a charm when I was your age ...... sigh...... (major smirk)

WOW i am speechless
so pretty much all guys just act now?
thats just horrible

hgb765
07-09-2006, 05:26 PM
but other then the bad advice you guys are giving johnny, this has got to be the funniest most hilarious thread i've ever seen

Dedans Penthouse
07-10-2006, 07:59 AM
but other then the bad advice you guys are giving johnny, this has got to be the funniest most hilarious thread i've ever seen
That WAS the idea.... (wink)

Jonnyf
07-10-2006, 08:59 AM
Whoa i think everyone thinks this has turned into a "Help jonny thread" ahh well i didnt ask for it

Janne
07-10-2006, 09:20 AM
WOW i am speechless
so pretty much all guys just act now?
thats just horrible

You cant pull us all over to one side you know. There are some boys/men who dont put on an act just to get some. :p

And why are some people trying to help JonnyF? Aint he a little too young for that yet? Even if he isnt, I´m sure he knows how to get a woman! ;)

How old are the people who post on this thread? :P

PS: Did the OP make this thread so he could brag?

Jonnyf
07-10-2006, 10:03 AM
You cant pull us all over to one side you know. There are some boys/men who dont put on an act just to get some. :p

And why are some people trying to help JonnyF? Aint he a little too young for that yet? Even if he isnt, Im sure he knows how to get a woman! ;)

How old are the people who post on this thread? :P

PS: Did the OP make this thread so he could brag?


haha thanks and im 14

Janne
07-10-2006, 11:14 AM
That's cool man. Im also a young kiddo currently at the age of 16.

Lakoste
07-10-2006, 11:31 AM
Theres 2 types of people in this world

1. Without sex you get smarter/better at tennis
2. Without sex you get dumber/worse at tennis

And remember, to a woman, sex is like the garbage man. They just take for granted the fact that any time they put some trash out on the street, a guy in a jumpsuit's gonna come along and pick it up.

dannyjjang
07-10-2006, 12:19 PM
Im 17 teen and can't WAIT TO have SEX!
But I have alots of friends in my C drive who do have sex


Pretty sure it feels like computer exhaustion!

Janne
07-10-2006, 12:37 PM
Im 17 teen and can't WAIT TO have SEX!
But I have alots of friends in my C drive who do have sex


Pretty sure it feels like computer exhaustion!

Advice from little brother Janne: Just dont rush it and make sure you and your partner are both ready for it.

Dont build up any big expectations since it'll be your first time and most teenagers usually get disappointed by their own performance because they've built up huge expectations (like lasting for several hours) after watching too many porno movies.

Always practice safe sex. :P

Sorry for this post, Im just bored out of my mind and you'll probably be seeing many posts like this in your nearest future.

Jonnyf
07-10-2006, 12:57 PM
Guys i feel sorry for you if you wanna do it legally in the us its 18 or 21 ( i think:confused: ) but over here its 16.!!!!

snoflewis
07-10-2006, 01:04 PM
Guys i feel sorry for you if you wanna do it legally in the us its 18 or 21 ( i think:confused: ) but over here its 16.!!!!

haha...i dont think the law gets in the way much when it comes to sex....

Jonnyf
07-10-2006, 01:05 PM
haha...i dont think the law gets in the way much when it comes to sex....

hence the IF ya wanna do it legally lol,

Janne
07-10-2006, 01:15 PM
Guys i feel sorry for you if you wanna do it legally in the us its 18 or 21 ( i think:confused: ) but over here its 16.!!!!

If my memory serves me right the age of consent in Sweden is 15, though there are some disgusting brats who get drunk and have sex just to improve their social status when they are under 15 years old. Damn those disgusting fjortisar.

Jonnyf
07-10-2006, 01:22 PM
Yeah Damn those LUCKY GITS lol

Tu Madre
07-10-2006, 01:48 PM
define sex.

Janne
07-10-2006, 02:26 PM
define sex.

Vaginal or anal penetration with a penis (penetration with fingers/other things is not sex. It's a form of masturbation). Then there's also oralsex which includes bj's and cunnilingus.

Performing any of those activities is my definition of sex.

jhhachamp
07-10-2006, 04:01 PM
WOW i am speechless
so pretty much all guys just act now?
thats just horrible

LOL, you took his post and came to the conclusion that all guys do exactly what he says?

wyutani
07-10-2006, 05:44 PM
Vaginal or anal penetration with a penis (penetration with fingers/other things is not sex. It's a form of masturbation). Then there's also oralsex which includes bj's and cunnilingus.

Performing any of those activities is my definition of sex.

lolz, i'll get a headache just by thinking about it...*groan*:(

Jonnyf
07-10-2006, 05:52 PM
lolz, i'll get a headache just by thinking about it...*groan*:(


What head,


Sorry everyone had to sorry

dannyjjang
07-10-2006, 07:05 PM
Advice from little brother Janne: Just dont rush it and make sure you and your partner are both ready for it.

Dont build up any big expectations since it'll be your first time and most teenagers usually get disappointed by their own performance because they've built up huge expectations (like lasting for several hours) after watching too many porno movies.

Always practice safe sex. :P

Sorry for this post, I´m just bored out of my mind and you'll probably be seeing many posts like this in your nearest future.
dont worry bratah im gonna sex it up after my marriage


and..JonnyF 16 is legal age?!
So your parents won't care if you bring yo girlfriend over your parents house and chikichiki bang bang?

"Mom can you get me a condom when you and dad goes over to super market, thx mom"

Janne
07-11-2006, 02:53 AM
dont worry bratah im gonna sex it up after my marriage


and..JonnyF 16 is legal age?!
So your parents won't care if you bring yo girlfriend over your parents house and chikichiki bang bang?

"Mom can you get me a condom when you and dad goes over to super market, thx mom"

That's awesome! You dont get to see many people who still wait for marriage until they have sex. I think it's a good thing. :)

In another thread I thought JonnyF said he was allowed to drink (when at home) so I wouldnt be surprised if they'd wouldnt care much about that (the condom buying thing, not having sex at home while they're still there).

Besides there's nothing weird about your parents buying you condoms. My dad buys them for me whenever I ask him to after he found out I had a girlfriend.

Jonnyf
07-11-2006, 05:53 AM
Yah i am but in the UK at the age of 5 you're allowed to drink in your houe with your parents consent

dannyjjang
07-11-2006, 08:18 AM
Yah i am but in the UK at the age of 5 you're allowed to drink in your houe with your parents consent
well that concerns with their health, they drink red wine which cleans up the blood line. thats why alot of them are tall and healthy

dannyjjang
07-11-2006, 08:19 AM
That's awesome! You dont get to see many people who still wait for marriage until they have sex. I think it's a good thing. :)

In another thread I thought JonnyF said he was allowed to drink (when at home) so I wouldnt be surprised if they'd wouldnt care much about that (the condom buying thing, not having sex at home while they're still there).

Besides there's nothing weird about your parents buying you condoms. My dad buys them for me whenever I ask him to after he found out I had a girlfriend.
pardon me but your age?
Do you live in same country as johnnyf?
Well age dont matter by the time you are a senior in highschool you lost it!
Thanks to shows like "Friends", "Will and Grace", "MTV"!

rommil
07-11-2006, 08:43 AM
Ahh, Dedans, you learn more? Me teach you more. Chinese, we have plenty ancient remedies make pecker knock on wood. Everything you see around forest make anscestors proud of family jewels. Also only choose animal parts that can make special wanton soup ...

Deer antlers - get the point?
Tiger penis - lost the point.
Bear testicles - well, he too slow and get kicked around.

You also very wise man ... panda bear, NO GOOD! Too slow, put two in cage 10 years, still only count two. Best part come from Moon Bear. No no, he no show white buttocks, he like to stare at moon.

;)
Are you not concerned after taking these aphrodisiacs (penis, testicles) that you might eventually not look for sex with your wife or girlfriend?J/k....It be kind of funny how you would explain to your friends if they saw those on your dinner table. Anyways, if you were to abstain from either sex or tennis, what will it be?

heartman
07-11-2006, 10:33 AM
That's what I say - CRAP! Sex is good for the mind, body and soul.

That's my story and I'm stickin' to it.

kingwilson
07-11-2006, 10:49 AM
Nah im removing it, its just too easy to reply to that post


OH also you bumped a thread for the most pathetic attempt at ripping me (sarcastic clap)


No not really I just thought you were extremely sad counting down the days till you can legally have sex. Sounds slightly desperate

Tchocky
07-11-2006, 10:51 AM
Are you talking about masturbation or sex with someone from the opposite sex?

Jonnyf
07-11-2006, 11:03 AM
No not really I just thought you were extremely sad counting down the days till you can legally have sex. Sounds slightly desperate

it was a joke seriously man a joke didnt ya get the but whos counting bit

Lee
07-11-2006, 11:10 AM
JWF, don't worry 'bout it... I'm with ya here
Some people just need to chill the f*ck out..

Jonnyf
07-11-2006, 11:14 AM
JWF, don't worry 'bout it... I'm with ya here
Some people just need to chill the f*ck out..


Thanks mate, and man ou actually do love my name lol

ThePlungerMan
07-11-2006, 11:17 AM
I'm going to refer to the Bible for guidance on this one. Though some of you are excluded.
Matthew 7:6 - Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you. :)

bc-05
07-11-2006, 11:24 AM
i dont get this talk anyway.. maybe in the old days u can make a big deal out of sex before marriage.. but these days? why even bother.. you have protections, etc. like no one even cares... i dont think anyone will these days.. theres a saying practice makes better.. im not saying ppl shouldnt save themselves i mean if you are thats good.. but (im not being racist but this is what i heard).. in asia i heard that they make a really big deal out of this.. i mean u get married.. first thing u find out is that both have no experience both doesnt know what theyre doing.. and both end up not enjoying sex :S i dunno but what i've seen with most asian ppl (again im not generalizing.. but from what ive seen in australia) they have sex only as a tool to have kids.. they dont even enjoy it :S and they become one of those machines that produces like 10 kids in one family :S but then again i dunno

Janne
07-11-2006, 11:43 AM
pardon me but your age?
Do you live in same country as johnnyf?
Well age dont matter by the time you are a senior in highschool you lost it!
Thanks to shows like "Friends", "Will and Grace", "MTV"!

Im 16 years old and I turn 17 in less than 2 months. No, I dont live in the same country as JonnyF. I live in Sweden. ;)

Bc-05: It's true that there are those who use sex as a tool to get children (usually money is one of many reasons) but there are many who who have sex as a way to express their feelings and/or for enjoyment of course.

And those that end up not enjoying sex because their first time wasnt good are pathetic beings. It is VERY RARE that ANYONES first time is good. It takes awhile before you get to know what YOU like and what your PARTNER likes and you need to be able to listen to your partner in order to create a good sex life. Practice makes perfect.

Sorry for another "Im so bored Ill just type nonsense"-post. :P

bc-05
07-11-2006, 11:49 AM
I´m 16 years old and I turn 17 in less than 2 months. No, I dont live in the same country as JonnyF. I live in Sweden. ;)

Bc-05: It's true that there are those who use sex as a tool to get children (usually money is one of many reasons) but there are many who who have sex as a way to express their feelings and/or for enjoyment of course.

And those that end up not enjoying sex because their first time wasnt good are pathetic beings. It is VERY RARE that ANYONES first time is good. It takes awhile before you get to know what YOU like and what your PARTNER likes and you need to be able to listen to your partner in order to create a good sex life. Practice makes perfect.

Sorry for another "I´m so bored I´ll just type nonsense"-post. :P

exactly thats wat i said janne.. :) like why not practice before u get married and when u get married u know what ur gonna do and u know wat u like.. as i said b4 ive seen many ..... in australia.. they only use sex as a tool to make babies.. like other than that they cant even enjoy it.. thats because they are too busy caring about this 'sex before marriage' bs.. which leads to their first time being 'i dont know what im doing' with another 'i dont know what im doing' which results in thats the worst sex ive ever had.. and its awkward!

Dedans Penthouse
07-11-2006, 12:03 PM
I´m 16 years old and I turn 17 in less than 2 months......I live in Sweden. ;) ...............but there are many who who have sex as a way to express their feelings and/or for enjoyment of course.

And those that end up not enjoying sex because their first time wasnt good are pathetic beings. It is VERY RARE that ANYONES first time is good. It takes awhile before you get to know what YOU like and what your PARTNER likes and you need to be able to listen to your partner in order to create a good sex life. Practice makes perfect. :P
To my new 'best friend' Janne:

Hejsan (Hej!). Hur mar du?

Jag heter dedans penthouse. Jag talar bara litet svenska.....jag blir nervos nar jag ska tala svenska.........Janne: Jag Alskar Dig~!!!!!

Jonnyf
07-11-2006, 12:05 PM
To my new 'best friend' Janne:

Hejsan (Hej!). Hur mar du?

Jag heter dedans penthouse. Jag talar bara litet svenska.....jag blir nervos nar jag ska tala svenska.........Janne: Jag Alskar Dig~!!!!!


OMG Janne uncle dendans is coming onto you







literally lolko

Janne
07-11-2006, 12:14 PM
"thats because they are too busy caring about this 'sex before marriage' bs.. which leads to their first time being 'i dont know what im doing' with another 'i dont know what im doing'"

What you say is that sex before marriage is stupid because it's better to practice before and I disagree. I meant that those who get married and have sex for the first time and get dissapointed and end up not liking it and not practicing it regularly are pathetic. You have plenty of time to practice after you've gotten married. I think that waiting for sex until marriage is great and I have huge respect to those that choose to wait. Im 100% sure that everyones first sex involved thoughts like " Oh my god. What do I do now?! ".

Dedans Penthouse
07-11-2006, 12:14 PM
literally lolko
Memo to self: move haggis-boy to "b" list; appears to be not so nice guy after all...

Janne
07-11-2006, 12:17 PM
To my new 'best friend' Janne:

Hejsan (Hej!). Hur mar du?

Jag heter dedans penthouse. Jag talar bara litet svenska.....jag blir nervos nar jag ska tala svenska.........Janne: Jag Alskar Dig~!!!!!

Hejsan! Jag mar bara bra. Hur mar du?
Dedans: JAG ALSKAR DIG OCKSA!!

Where did you learn Swedish by the way? :o

Jonnyf
07-11-2006, 12:17 PM
Memo to self: move haggis-boy to "b" list; appears to be not so nice guy after all...


ahhh sorry dedans i was only joking

bc-05
07-11-2006, 12:22 PM
"thats because they are too busy caring about this 'sex before marriage' bs.. which leads to their first time being 'i dont know what im doing' with another 'i dont know what im doing'"

What you say is that sex before marriage is stupid because it's better to practice before and I disagree. I meant that those who get married and have sex for the first time and get dissapointed and end up not liking it and not practicing it regularly are pathetic. You have plenty of time to practice after you've gotten married. I think that waiting for sex until marriage is great and I have huge respect to those that choose to wait. Im 100% sure that everyones first sex involved thoughts like " Oh my god. What do I do now?! ".
ye but on that first time u actually dont care coz its ur first time.. but with ur wife going 'wtf i dont know wat im doing..' that would be the most embarassing thing ever.. and if ur saying those ppl are pathetic.. i gotta say a lot of (bleh im not gonna generalize so ye) ppl are pathetic then..

Dedans Penthouse
07-11-2006, 12:24 PM
I know you were; I was joking as well. I mean, how could you take "haggis boy" seriously?

Hell, how can anyone take haggis seriously--yikes! :-)

Now, where was I? Oh yes.....Janne: Jag Alskar Dig~

Jonnyf
07-11-2006, 12:27 PM
I know how can anyone take me seriously. And haggis=REPULSIVE sheep intestine and bollocks NASTY. Ill fill you in on some scottish footie traditions. Aberdeen fans are traditionally called Sheep Sha**ers. Dont know why i just told you that

Janne
07-11-2006, 12:36 PM
Bc-05: I said that the people who GIVE UP because their first time experience was embarassing are pathetic, not the people who have an embarassing first time, that's natural. I can easily say that my first time was quite an embarassing moment at first with me flopping around on the bed like a fish on dry land (exaggeration) until I overcame my nervousness by reminding myself that we were both virgins and that it was natural to feel scared/nervous.

Janne
07-11-2006, 12:42 PM
Now, where was I? Oh yes.....Janne: Jag Alskar Dig~

Jag alskar dig ocksa! Jag alskar dig nastan lika mycket som jag alskar mig sjalv!

MegacedU
07-11-2006, 12:43 PM
Alright Janney, I'm assuming you're female, and you're saying that right after your first time you wanted to go ahead and do it again?! That just doesn't happen. Because the second time isn't good either. Apparently you lie there and wonder why you're doing it again. It's not until much later that you actually start liking it. You certainly don't want to take part in it THAT soon after your frist time.

Jonnyf
07-11-2006, 12:49 PM
Nah its a dudddee meg

MegacedU
07-11-2006, 12:51 PM
Nah its a dudddee meg
Haha in which case you can all make fun of me now.

Janne
07-11-2006, 12:54 PM
Alright Janney, I'm assuming you're female, and you're saying that right after your first time you wanted to go ahead and do it again?! That just doesn't happen. Because the second time isn't good either. Apparently you lie there and wonder why you're doing it again. It's not until much later that you actually start liking it. You certainly don't want to take part in it THAT soon after your frist time.

Actually I happen to be a male named Janne, though you can keep thinking me of as a woman if you'd prefer me that way. Now dedans might take back his love declarations...

Anyway, Meg, it took me and my girlfriend 2 or was it maybe 3 days until we did it again after the first time and you're right that the second time wasnt exactly perfect either, but it was getting better! We started talking about what we liked and what we didnt like and thought of ways to improve our pleasure. Some worked and some didnt.

Dedans Penthouse
07-11-2006, 12:56 PM
Hejsan! Jag mar bara bra. Hur mar du?
Dedans: JAG ALSKAR DIG OCKSA!!

Where did you learn Swedish by the way? :o
Hej Janne:

Jag larde mig litet av tet fron en van, Anna Carlsson. Jag skulle alskar att praktisera med dig. Verklign, att praktisera gor en perfekt. I'm sure I'm butchering my "svensk" but that doesn't matter. The only thing on this earth that matters to me at this point, the only thing that makes sense to me at this moment is:

jag alskar dig, Janne

Janne
07-11-2006, 01:22 PM
Hej Janne:

Jag larde mig litet av tet fron en van, Anna Carlsson. Jag skulle alskar att praktisera med dig. Verklign, att praktisera gor en perfekt. I'm sure I'm butchering my "svensk" but that doesn't matter. The only thing on this earth that matters to me at this point, the only thing that makes sense to me at this moment is:

jag alskar dig, Janne

Your swedish isnt actually all that bad. It's actually quite good considering you've learned it from a friend. Verkligen, om jag inte vore upptagen sa skulle jag utan tvekan kasta mig i din famn.

Dedans Penthouse
07-12-2006, 05:18 AM
Actually I happen to be a male named Janne, though you can keep thinking me of as a woman if you'd prefer me that way. Now dedans might take back his love declarations....AGGGHH!!! MAJOR WHOOPS!!! Janne: I just went from love to LIKING you. My bad. :shock:

Frodo Baggins
07-12-2006, 10:08 AM
Dedan He played you>Like a love fool;) lol Funny lol.

Janne
07-12-2006, 12:35 PM
No worries, even though you scared me a bit (not used to love declarations from guys over the net who are atleast 5 years older than me). Everyone always thinks I'm a girl... :-|

Having a Finnish name sucks when you are using it as your screen name at american forums.

Dedans Penthouse
07-13-2006, 06:01 AM
Everyone always thinks I'm a girl... :-|
Having a Finnish name sucks when you are using it as your screen name at american forums.
Stupid me; it didn't dawn on me that your first name was "Sumoi" .... otherwise instead of jag alsker dig, I'd be (mistakenly) warbling: mita kuuluu?mina rakastan sinua, as in:

"kultani: mina rakastan sinua ikuisesti minun kaunis kunningatar; mina rakastan sinua--milliona kertaa!"

Back on topic: negative effect on how you play the next morning? Nah, it's more a matter of getting enough "post-afterglow" sleep, imo.

MegacedU
07-13-2006, 11:51 AM
No worries, even though you scared me a bit (not used to love declarations from guys over the net who are atleast 5 years older than me). Everyone always thinks I'm a girl... :-|

Having a Finnish name sucks when you are using it as your screen name at american forums.
I have a friend who's Finnish named Okko, he drinks like a fish and is hysterical. Anyway, I just thought Okko was a cool name.

Janne
07-13-2006, 12:52 PM
I have a friend who's Finnish named Okko, he drinks like a fish and is hysterical. Anyway, I just thought Okko was a cool name.

Interesting. I didnt know such a name existed. I guess you learn new things everyday.

Dedans: How come you know how to type in Finnish too? Did some friend also teach you that? Seriously, soon you'll be typing in Mongolian.

On Topic: No negative effect.

Dedans Penthouse
07-14-2006, 07:09 AM
dedans: How come you know how to type in Finnish too? Did some friend also teach you that? Seriously, soon you'll be typing in Mongolian.How come? Yes, a Finnish "friend" (Reita) from Helsinki, minum (former) suomalinen kunningatar. Haven't been there since playing music at a festival in south east Finland in 2004 (Kotka, Fi.). Btw, I've heard that your weather this summer (well, in Finland anyway) has been spectacular. I miss taking "sauna" ("loyly" steam and "birch branches") and the swimming and the grilled sausages and the ice-cold Karhu beer that followed.....I especially miss the 'midnight' swimming. I miss Suomi. :sad:

As for "Mongolian?" Nah Janne, I'm not really into that "look"; not that there's anything wrong with it (lol)

jaykay
03-13-2007, 11:17 AM
Here's something funny that I came across recently:

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS


Smart man + smart woman = romance

Smart man + dumb woman = affair

Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy


********



OFFICE ARITHMETIC


Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee = production

Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime


********

SHOPPING MATH


A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.


********

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS


A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.


********

HAPPINESS


To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand
her at all.


********

LONGEVITY


Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more
willing to die.


********

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE


A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.


********

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE


A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.


********

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED


Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and
cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the
same thing to them at funerals.


********

CanadianChic
03-13-2007, 10:07 PM
Amazing how guys will blame just about anything on playing poorly. Thanks for the laugh.

drhopz
03-13-2007, 10:16 PM
GOOD ONE jaykay. Kept me entertained for the duration.

Ripper
03-14-2007, 08:13 AM
Hadn't seen this thread for a while :)

oscar_2424
03-14-2007, 09:06 AM
you'll play fine if u MAKE her do all the work;)

Frodo Baggins
03-14-2007, 09:49 AM
its Amazing cc>Funny how they All Talk like thier All PROS Or Highly Experienced..:confused: NOT..