PDA

View Full Version : I need some trash talk ideas


freelans
05-20-2006, 07:47 AM
This is a little tongue in cheek of course but there are times when I could a bit of an edge and I think a little trash talk helps ease the tension on the courts during a friendly game.

So what is some of the trash you guys like to throw out there? :)

Rickson
05-20-2006, 08:04 AM
This is a little tongue in cheek of course but there are times when I could a bit of an edge and I think a little trash talk helps ease the tension on the courts during a friendly game.

So what is some of the trash you guys like to throw out there? :)
You want trash talk? First of all, your dumb *** posted this thread in the wrong section, you moron. Secondly, if you can't figure out how to trash talk someone on your own, you'd get eaten up anyway. You're so weak, you couldn't punch your way out of a wet, paper bag. You think your ball hit the line? Your vision is so bad, Maria Sharapova makes more accurate calls than you do. You call that a serve? I've seen better serves from grandmas who just started playing at the nursing home.

Good luck!

freelans
05-20-2006, 08:21 AM
You da man Rickson. :)

Bungalo Bill
05-20-2006, 08:59 AM
This is a little tongue in cheek of course but there are times when I could a bit of an edge and I think a little trash talk helps ease the tension on the courts during a friendly game.

So what is some of the trash you guys like to throw out there? :)

I dont think you can handle trash talk you sissy foreigner. You have no game, no style, and you look like a complete dork on the court. Why do you still play? Why do you still insist you can hit a ball?

Your forehand is so easy to hit back, I am going to destroy it. Every chance I get, I gonna take my knife and ram it into your heart. You never learned how to play this game and you're overrated!!! :p

Andres
05-20-2006, 09:13 AM
Your mama.

Yeah your mama.

No, your mama.

Works every time :mrgreen:

35ft6
05-20-2006, 09:16 AM
"You can open your eyes now." "I had sex with your wife." "Yo mama is so stupid it takes her half an hour to make Minute Rice."

Andres
05-20-2006, 09:16 AM
I dont think you can handle trash talk you sissy foreigner. You have no game, no style, and you look like a complete dork on the court. Why do you still play? Why do you still insist you can hit a ball?

Your forehand is so easy to hit back, I am going to destroy it. Every chance I get, I gonna take my knife and ram it into your heart. You never learned how to play this game and you're overrated!!!
You see? This is how an OLD player trash-talks
OLD players uses words like "overrated", "foreigner" and "dork" :mrgreen:

We youngsters use words a "beotch", "fo' shizzle ma' nizzle", and stuff like that :mrgreen:

Sorry to bring you down, bungallo, but in the trash talking thread, it was the right thing to do!!! :mrgreen:

Bungalo Bill
05-20-2006, 09:50 AM
You see? This is how an OLD player trash-talks
OLD players uses words like "overrated", "foreigner" and "dork"

We youngsters use words a "beotch", "fo' shizzle ma' nizzle", and stuff like that :mrgreen:

Sorry to bring you down, bungallo, but in the trash talking thread, it was the right thing to do!!! :mrgreen:

What, are you on crack? Who the hell are you? I think you're full of it Andres. Where did you learn to play? Can you even spell the word tennis, you snivelling little baby? You're overrated man! :p

you little (bleeep) and (bleeep), you look like (bleeep), and you dress like a (bleeep) (bleeep), lol

Andres
05-20-2006, 10:02 AM
What, are you on crack? Who the hell are you? I think you're full of it Andres. Where did you learn to play? Can you even spell the word tennis, you snivelling little baby? You're overrated man! :p

you little (bleeep) and (bleeep), you look like (bleeep), and you dress like a (bleeep) (bleeep), lol
Your mama :mrgreen:

- Andrés.

Bungalo Bill
05-20-2006, 10:07 AM
Your mama :mrgreen:

- Andrés.

LOL :o

Return_Ace
05-20-2006, 10:09 AM
We youngsters use words a "beotch", "fo' shizzle ma' nizzle", and stuff like that

lol, that reminded me of people playing cs:s :/

i mean, when someone goes "ha, fo sh0 i'm goona bust a cap in y0 @ss bi-atch" how the hell do you take them seriously?

DX_Psycho
05-20-2006, 10:12 AM
do you like the internet? cause you sure like hititng into the net.

MADE THAT ONE UP MYSELF BABY.

Bungalo Bill
05-20-2006, 10:12 AM
lol, that reminded me of people playing cs:s :/

i mean, when someone goes "ha, fo sh0 i'm goona bust a cap in y0 @ss bi-atch" how the hell do you take them seriously?

You just look at them and then bust out laughing while walking away.

ralphtifftennis
05-20-2006, 05:00 PM
Hey Freelans, you picked up tennis because you were to short to play basketball, right? Maybe you should have stuck with basketball!

I think I am going to play lefthanded and full court just to make it interesting. Don't worry though I won't change, sissy boy! By the way is that a Walmart raquet? I hear they are really affordable these days.

Maybe we should put some money on this as I need some motivation. Or you can just pay me up front and we'll call it a lesson! Brother where did you get those shoes?

You should probably leave the tennis forum now and go study for school! Come back when you're :cool:.



(just kidding of course)

MTChong
05-20-2006, 05:04 PM
You're pathetic.

metsjets
05-20-2006, 05:33 PM
do you like the internet? cause you sure like hititng into the net.

MADE THAT ONE UP MYSELF BABY.
haha you're gay :)

jimiforpres
05-20-2006, 06:07 PM
If you really want mess someone up, don't be too obvious about anything. If you come out on the court and start shooting off your mouth, then the guy will never take you seriously. Say something like,"My return is pretty bad today, normally I crush dinky serves". They may not become really mad, but they will try to prove you wrong by ripping their serves, causing them to double fault, which usually leads to the collapse of the rest of their game.

Roddick The Beast
05-20-2006, 06:16 PM
This is a little tongue in cheek of course but there are times when I could a bit of an edge and I think a little trash talk helps ease the tension on the courts during a friendly game.

So what is some of the trash you guys like to throw out there? :)*yawns* I should have brought the morning papers with me and a pot of coffee.

Andres
05-20-2006, 10:08 PM
LOL :o
You see? It works any time, and at any level :mrgreen:
You should try it ;)

Rep. Timothy Calhoun
05-20-2006, 10:12 PM
This is a little tongue in cheek of course but there are times when I could a bit of an edge and I think a little trash talk helps ease the tension on the courts during a friendly game.

So what is some of the trash you guys like to throw out there? :)"I thought warm-ups were over???"

Roforot
05-21-2006, 07:26 AM
Your momma's so fat, when she wear a green dress white her white purse, kids try to hit serves into her neck fold.

Your momma's so cheap, she couldn't buy you nothing but that *****y (insert frame)

Your momma's so nasty, Phillopousis wouldn't hit it.

(when there's a let cord), say "Did your momma fall down?"


:)

Bungalo Bill
05-21-2006, 09:57 AM
Your momma's so fat, when she wear a green dress white her white purse, kids try to hit serves into her neck fold.

Your momma's so cheap, she couldn't buy you nothing but that *****y (insert frame)

Your momma's so nasty, Phillopousis wouldn't hit it.

(when there's a let cord), say "Did your momma fall down?"


:)

You talking to my teammate? :)

ShooterMcMarco
05-21-2006, 10:45 AM
Roforot, your momma is so ugly, Federer would rather f#@! his cow than her.

Rickson
05-21-2006, 10:54 AM
Roforot, your momma is so ugly, Federer would rather f#@! his cow than her.
You now hold the title for the worst "your momma" joke ever.

Mr.Federer
05-21-2006, 03:20 PM
When you win a point say: "sooo easy".

Roddick The Beast
05-21-2006, 04:21 PM
When you win a point say: "sooo easy".Ok, your's is the best. LMAO, "it's so easy", c'mon! :rolleyes: "It's so easy." C'mon ^_^ LMAO, "it's so easy", c'mon! :rolleyes: "It's so easy." C'mon ^_^ LMAO, "it's so easy", c'mon! :rolleyes: "It's so easy." C'mon ^_^

Jon Hampton
05-21-2006, 04:29 PM
I honestly start calling out my shots before I hit them, just because I want my friend to think I'm so cocky about my shots that I even if he knows what's coming, I'll still hit a winner on him anyway.

DRtenniS1112
05-21-2006, 04:34 PM
I am a frequent user of how do u like these lines...

They respond in whatever way

You say oh i cuz i just painted em

Roddick The Beast
05-21-2006, 04:39 PM
I honestly start calling out my shots before I hit them, just because I want my friend to think I'm so cocky about my shots that I even if he knows what's coming, I'll still hit a winner on him anyway.That can be seen as rude. You shouts (or speech) could starlte the opponent, causing them to lose focus, be it 1 millisecond etc., it still may potentially cause them to lose focus. There's a rule against that too.

Kabob190
05-21-2006, 05:11 PM
as your walking on the court say "just remember the ball is the yellow thing"

my friend always said this to me when i was first starting out. It was actually more annoying than funny.

Ammo
05-21-2006, 06:05 PM
ur mom is like a shotgun, two cocks and she's ready to blow!
ur mom is like a Christmas tree, everyone puts their balls on her!
ur mom is like a light switch, even a four year old can turn her on!
ur mom is so fat, when she fel in love she broke it!
ur mom is so stupid, she stood on a chair to raise her IQ!

-peace:mrgreen:

Kabob190
05-21-2006, 06:28 PM
close your mouth when you're talkin to me

Roddick The Beast
05-21-2006, 06:34 PM
close your mouth when you're talkin to meTalk to the hand! (corny!) Haha

Roforot
05-22-2006, 08:00 PM
ur mom is like a shotgun, two cocks and she's ready to blow!
ur mom is like a Christmas tree, everyone puts their balls on her!
ur mom is like a light switch, even a four year old can turn her on!
ur mom is so fat, when she fel in love she broke it!
ur mom is so stupid, she stood on a chair to raise her IQ!

-peace:mrgreen:

Your momma jokes are better than mine (though I tried to tie mine to tennis); you must have had more practice than I :)

Roddick The Beast
05-22-2006, 08:08 PM
Your momma jokes are better than mine (though I tried to tie mine to tennis); you must have had more practice than I :)Naw, it's called "Google". Originality no longer exists. Didn't you know that? :mrgreen:

Freedom
05-22-2006, 08:25 PM
Lol I call my shots too. Not in official matches, of course. But I always tell my friend when I am about to pass him. He gets ****ed when the ball goes past right like I said it would too. :cool:

Just say "Your mom" after everything. Everything. Even when you aren't playing tennis.

Jon Hampton
05-22-2006, 08:30 PM
That can be seen as rude. You shouts (or speech) could starlte the opponent, causing them to lose focus, be it 1 millisecond etc., it still may potentially cause them to lose focus. There's a rule against that too.

Beast, we're talking about a friendly match here, not a professional tournament. Talking during points during a friendly match is perfectly acceptable if both people think it's okay.

Now, word to your mother.

Andres
05-22-2006, 10:02 PM
Just tell him you slept with his wife, that would kill him...

You: - Oh yeah? And I just SLEPT WITH YOUR WIFE!!!
Him: - :shock:
Other guy: - His wife is in a coma...

katastrof
05-23-2006, 08:26 AM
Just tell him you slept with his wife, that would kill him...

You: - Oh yeah? And I just SLEPT WITH YOUR WIFE!!!
Him: - :shock:
Other guy: - His wife is in a coma...
Seinfeld freak, Andres?

sureshs
05-23-2006, 08:28 AM
I came here to play tennis with you, not badminton.

Andres
05-23-2006, 09:18 AM
Seinfeld freak, Andres?
Naturally ;)

kevhen
05-23-2006, 09:23 AM
No need to use words to make them feel like crap. Just smile like Hingis after you win a point, or just play them left-handed if they can't handle your regular game.

Tell them they can take 3 serves if you want to really demean them. Make sure you know you can beat them easily before trashtalking or you look pretty stupid and pathetic though.

mucat
05-23-2006, 10:15 AM
the jerk store called, they're running out of you

Oh well...

Roddick The Beast
05-23-2006, 10:20 AM
Beast, we're talking about a friendly match here, not a professional tournament. Talking during points during a friendly match is perfectly acceptable if both people think it's okay.

Now, word to your mother.OO

Roddick The Beast
05-23-2006, 10:21 AM
No need to use words to make them feel like crap. Just smile like Hingis after you win a point, or just play them left-handed if they can't handle your regular game.

Tell them they can take 3 serves if you want to really demean them. Make sure you know you can beat them easily before trashtalking or you look pretty stupid and pathetic though.Okay, that's the best advice so far.

jamumafa
05-23-2006, 10:21 AM
Yo momma so old - she owes Jesus 50 pence.

Yo momma so fat and slow - she got run over by a parked car

Yo momma so fat - she sat on a rainbow and Skittles popped out

DrewRafter8
05-23-2006, 01:53 PM
"A blind squirrel finds an acorn every once in a while"

You guys KNOW what type of shots that quote refers to.

MegacedU
05-23-2006, 02:04 PM
This doesn't really apply to me, but I have several male friends that say to each other:

That's what she said.

Kabob190
05-23-2006, 02:28 PM
This doesn't really apply to me, but I have several male friends that say to each other:

That's what she said.

comebacks like these and yo momma get really really old when you are coming up with original jokes and the other guy just says thats what she said. or yo momma.

brucie
05-23-2006, 02:29 PM
If they fluke a shot or miss hit one for a winner give them over praise until they feel stupid, if you do it just remind them how bad the shot they just lost to was this really gets em wound up!

jaZZirat
05-23-2006, 09:01 PM
Is that all you got...I played your sister last night. Not only is she a better tennis player she's a great kisser too!

I just talked with your mother at the change over. She says I can go home with her after the match. She said take your time walking home.

MatchpointServe
05-24-2006, 07:05 PM
My coach does a lot of 'fun' trash talking. He's pretty cool. He always says stuff like, "Do you need a tissue?" or "Oh I'm sorry, was that serve to fast for you? I'll try and slow it down." or "Why don't you just give up now?" "Ready to give up?" It's all in good fun, and he's a great guy. Perhaps try that.

Roddick The Beast
05-24-2006, 07:09 PM
My coach does a lot of 'fun' trash talking. He's pretty cool. He always says stuff like, "Do you need a tissue?" or "Oh I'm sorry, was that serve to fast for you? I'll try and slow it down." or "Why don't you just give up now?" "Ready to give up?" It's all in good fun, and he's a great guy. Perhaps try that.My dad talks smack constantly! I know he is only messing around and trying to train my mental toughness and all. It gets to me though! ARGGGGG

He'll say like: "Give me another double fault so that I can conserve some energy!" or "That's not going in!" Stuff like that!

Haha

Bungalo Bill
05-24-2006, 07:47 PM
My dad talks smack constantly! I know he is only messing around and trying to train my mental toughness and all. It gets to me though! ARGGGGG

So what are you saying? You are soft in the head? lol

He'll say like: "Give me another double fault so that I can conserve some energy!" or "That's not going in!" Stuff like that!

Haha

Probably wants you to stop hitting like a girl and is worried you might turn....

wyutani
05-24-2006, 07:50 PM
So what are you saying? You are soft in the head? lol



Probably wants you to stop hitting like a girl and is worried you might turn....

lolz, really mean...haha

Roddick The Beast
05-24-2006, 07:53 PM
So what are you saying? You are soft in the head? lol



Probably wants you to stop hitting like a girl and is worried you might turn....Ouch!!!!!!

Roddick The Beast
05-24-2006, 07:54 PM
lolz, really mean...hahaNot compared to the things that people say about "your game"! :mrgreen: (Whoops, sorry to bring that up) ^_^

wyutani
05-24-2006, 07:57 PM
Not compared to the things that people say about "your game"! :mrgreen: (Whoops, sorry to bring that up) ^_^

what's wrong wif "my game' eh?

Andres
05-24-2006, 09:01 PM
what's wrong wif "my game' eh?
What? You actually HAVE a game?
Probably, Bungallo and TennisAsAlways would disagree with you ;)

Kabob190
05-24-2006, 09:32 PM
My dad talks smack constantly! I know he is only messing around and trying to train my mental toughness and all. It gets to me though! ARGGGGG

He'll say like: "Give me another double fault so that I can conserve some energy!" or "That's not going in!" Stuff like that!

Haha

I know what you mean about dads talking smack. My dad isnt very good at it he gives a fake lauph kinda like haha or he'll say something extremely stupid. It gets really annoying when you're trying your hardest and he just says stupid things even though he's playing just as good if not worse than you are.

Roddick The Beast
05-24-2006, 09:36 PM
I know what you mean about dads talking smack. My dad isnt very good at it he gives a fake lauph kinda like haha or he'll say something extremely stupid. It gets really annoying when you're trying your hardest and he just says stupid things even though he's playing just as good if not worse than you are.Yeah, I've been really calm lately though. I am learning that I do not play well when I am angry. :) I guess some people feed off of rage.

Kabob190
05-24-2006, 09:43 PM
Yeah, I've been really calm lately though. I am learning that I do not play well when I am angry. :) I guess some people feed off of rage.

I am trying to get passed this because my game, serve in particular, definitely is at a lower level when i am angry. My dad is never going to stop so i am going to have to learn to stay calm. Its not that easy because my dad is good at gettin under my skin.

Roddick The Beast
05-24-2006, 09:49 PM
I am trying to get passed this because my game, serve in particular, definitely is at a lower level when i am angry. My dad is never going to stop so i am going to have to learn to stay calm. Its not that easy because my dad is good at gettin under my skin.Well, I think my dad is succeeding in what he's doing. He IS afterall making me insane, and so I have to adapt to it! I think he's trying to throw all of this "unsportmanlike trash talking" at me, more than I would experience in reality, so that I will be better able to cope with people in real matches.

Kabob190
05-24-2006, 10:09 PM
Well, I think my dad is succeeding in what he's doing. He IS afterall making me insane, and so I have to adapt to it! I think he's trying to throw all of this "unsportmanlike trash talking" at me, more than I would experience in reality, so that I will be better able to cope with people in real matches.

He's already made me insane, he keeps annoying me yet i still ask him to play every chance i get. People dont really act like this during matches, my dad just does it for the hell of it. Kinda his source for amusment, make fun of my son.

slice bh compliment
05-24-2006, 10:24 PM
I forget the exact story, but this one time? at tennis? Ilie Nastase asked a guy about his clothes...like, "Hey nice outfit, man....you like it, heh? Good...I deedent know they started making those for men. Do they make that for men?"

I bet this works even better if your opponent wears something either effeminate or just a bit too fancy and/or matching.

dmvprof
05-25-2006, 07:25 AM
If you want to get into his head, start laughing every once in a while for no reason, just think of something funny. But don't tell him why, act as if you've got a secret.

I swear, it'll get in his head more than any trash talking can.

Kabob190
05-25-2006, 01:53 PM
or just smile in a really creepy manner after every point

Roddick The Beast
05-25-2006, 01:58 PM
or just smile in a really creepy manner after every pointLMAO! Imagine giving your opponent that "creepy butler" high-pitched odd giggle, with the creepy smile, eye and facial expressions: "Mmmm, yyyyhesssssss?" :mrgreen:

Kabob190
05-25-2006, 02:31 PM
LMAO! Imagine giving your opponent that "creepy butler" high-pitched odd giggle, with the creepy smile, eye and facial expressions: "Mmmm, yyyyhesssssss?" :mrgreen:

lol and add something a bulter might say, like you rang? er that was kinda stupid but you catch my drift

porchdoor
05-28-2006, 09:21 PM
"that's out, you say? hm, i didn't realize you were both blind and ********."

bluegrasser
05-29-2006, 09:46 AM
How about a vintage one : " Your Mother wears army boots."

TennsDog
05-29-2006, 09:11 PM
My favorite: (after hitting an ace) look across the court and simply say "ALL DAY!" They get the point. You can add your own emphasis whether you want it to be simple and matter-of-fact or more in-you-face kind. I prefer the latter myself. I'm not sure if that's the kid of trash talk you're looking for, but it sure can get to them if you are actually doing it all day. ;)

slice bh compliment
05-29-2006, 09:14 PM
That wouldn't even **** me off. It's too tennis-related.
I'd just make a special effort to get that serve back and make you play longer points. All day.

BigbangerNYC
06-28-2006, 06:50 AM
My trashtalk:

--When I rip a passing shot passed the net player, I say: "Oh sh*t, I missed the target."

--Winning volley: " I killed the duck"

--Ace: "Need I slow it down more for you?"

-- on opponent's missed volley or shanked shot: " would you like to borrow my fishnet?"

--opponent's double-fault: "take 10"

--when I pin a hard volley shot to the oppoent's body: "target too big" (especially when the opponent is a bit overweight).

--beginning of match or after winning first set: "Bagels or baguettes? Your choice..."

--On questioning my linecall : " What are you a Cyclop you can't see depth?"

--On questioning my calling his serve or shot wide: "Honestly, it was as wide as your wife (or as your body)"

--On his calling my shot long or wide: "The court must have expanded since the last point"

HyperHorse
06-28-2006, 09:23 AM
my solution against trash talkers....
push them off the baseline with deep topspin strokes.. then drop shot... weak reply...
then just smack the ball right at them..

retroceso
06-28-2006, 01:12 PM
just make fun of their vision

my favorite line "Stop playing like a *****."
cursing alway does the trick

Dink
08-13-2007, 11:25 PM
Maybe we should put some money on this as I need some motivation. Or you can just pay me up front and we'll call it a lesson!

Pure Genius.

Here are a few basketball trashtalking tips:
http://www.youtube.com/v/YxYIYYDU1sY
"Listen to the sound of getting dunked on!

Dink
08-13-2007, 11:40 PM
Is it true that Connors and McEnroe used to exchange words and shouldercheck each other during changeovers? Do players today trashtalk at all?

NoSkillzAndy
08-14-2007, 01:15 AM
I've never actually used any of these in match situations, but my friends and I like to joke around with a little trash taking and gamesmanship every now and then. Regular trash talking is so boring and predictable, so we like to take it to another level...

* Before the match starts drop a pair of bagels in your opponent's tennis bag.

* Before the match ask your opponent to pick a number between 1 and 6. Once they give you a number you reply, "Okay, that's how many games you're going to get."

* Before the match hand your opponent a bill for a 1 hour lesson.

* Show up to the match dressed in "throw back" tennis clothes from the 1930's, complete with slacks, sweeter vest, wood racquet, and greasy combed over hair. Then win.

* Trash talk in a weak, high-pitched cracking voice and say stupid things like, "You're in my world now" or "The bigger they are, the harder they fall!"

* Use the Hewitt come on! with the "vicht" hand gesture whenever possible. Peferably when you have little to do with winning the point, such as an opponent double fault.

* If the "vicht" isn't working for you, try upping it a notch or two with the patented Jimmy Conners double fist pump, or perhaps dance around the court like a monkey (a la Stepanek).

* If your opponent misses an easy return of serve, ask them if they want you to slow it down a little for them.

* If your opponent hits a clean winner, hesitate for a moment while looking at where the ball landed, then demonstrably call it out. When your opponent predictably questions your call, say "No, no, it was definately out. Here look at the mark." Then walk over to a ficticious mark several feet away from where the ball actually landed and circle that spot with your racquet.

* If your opponent calls one of your shots that was clearly out, out, then throw your racquet down and yell at them, "That's bull*****! That was on the line!"

* Every now and then, launch a serve directly at your opponent trying to hit them in the air. If you miss say, "Oh, sorry about that. I was just trying to get an easy point." If you actually hit them, proceed to talk as much trash as possible and/or use one of the hand gestures from above.

* The ever classic, make all your "out" line calls before the ball even comes close to bouncing. If the ball actually lands in, don't bother to reverse your call.

* If your opponent hits a winner and you don't feel like calling it out, compliment them by saying, "Nice shot... b!tch!"

* Call out your own strokes before you hit them, and try to give them special names when possible, like in Prince of Tennis or something. Some examples: "ridiculous forehand winner cross court", "slice of legend", "monkey drinks master's wine", & "chopper".

skiracer55
08-14-2007, 08:37 AM
...you just missed another service return. I'll bet you feel just like a big piece of doo-doo, don't you? Here...want me to serve underhand?"

Dink
08-14-2007, 08:38 AM
* Before the match starts drop a pair of bagels in your opponent's tennis bag.

* Before the match hand your opponent a bill for a 1 hour lesson.

* Use the Hewitt come on! with the "vicht" hand gesture whenever possible. Peferably when you have little to do with winning the point, such as an opponent double fault.

* If the "vicht" isn't working for you, try upping it a notch or two with the patented Jimmy Conners double fist pump, or perhaps dance around the court like a monkey (a la Stepanek).

* Every now and then, launch a serve directly at your opponent trying to hit them in the air. If you miss say, "Oh, sorry about that. I was just trying to get an easy point." If you actually hit them, proceed to talk as much trash as possible and/or use one of the hand gestures from above.

* The ever classic, make all your "out" line calls before the ball even comes close to bouncing. If the ball actually lands in, don't bother to reverse your call.

* Call out your own strokes before you hit them, and try to give them special names when possible, like in Prince of Tennis or something. Some examples: "ridiculous forehand winner cross court", "slice of legend", "monkey drinks master's wine", & "chopper".

Have you been watching my matches? :-D

http://www.iamplify.com/images/1161716534705-gsl-jimmy-connors.jpg

I'd like to add the following to the list:

* Make the Top Spin "not in my house" gesture whenever you putaway a volley or an overhead.

* Scream "Don't throw that trash on my court!" whenever you putaway a floater.

ktownva
08-14-2007, 08:56 AM
Dear Dink,

Your avatar is beyond lame. Chris Duhon is the most worthless POS in the NBA. If I were Paxon I would try to trade him for like a future third round pick and a Snickers bar. Probably isn't worth that even. I can't believe he ever got into Duke, not that they are any good cuz they suck as bad as Duhon. My VCU Rams sent their asses packing Round 1.

John Isner is the future - yeah, the future punching bag for Fed/Nadal/Djoker, if he ever gets deep enough to lose to them which is unlikely.

PS - I would kick your butt so bad at tennis, you would need a tub of cream cheese for all the bagels. Have a nice day :-D

kevhen
08-14-2007, 08:59 AM
Your woman has a better backhand than you. Her strokes are much smoother and even a little bit harder than yours but then she has the perfect grip size. Your woman grunts much louder than you. Your woman looks incredible in a tennis skirt and even better with it off.

New Schoolers use 'biatch' in place of 'woman'.

Tempyst
08-14-2007, 09:36 AM
"I've got your name, I've got your A##!"

Dink
08-14-2007, 09:40 AM
Dear Dink,

Your avatar is beyond lame. Chris Duhon is the most worthless POS in the NBA. If I were Paxon I would try to trade him for like a future third round pick and a Snickers bar. Probably isn't worth that even. I can't believe he ever got into Duke, not that they are any good cuz they suck as bad as Duhon. My VCU Rams sent their asses packing Round 1.

John Isner is the future - yeah, the future punching bag for Fed/Nadal/Djoker, if he ever gets deep enough to lose to them which is unlikely.

PS - I would kick your butt so bad at tennis, you would need a tub of cream cheese for all the bagels. Have a nice day :-D

Dang, that is some excellent trashtalk! (tips hat)

supersmash
08-14-2007, 09:47 AM
Like a previous poster suggested, bring a newspaper and read it during the changeover.

"What are you doing?"

"...Bored"


Or, after you bagel someone, reach into your bag and pull out a Philadelphia Cream Cheese logo.

Dink
08-14-2007, 09:51 AM
Like a previous poster suggested, bring a newspaper and read it during the changeover.

"What are you doing?"

"...Bored"


Or, after you bagel someone, reach into your bag and pull out a Philadelphia Cream Cheese logo.

Better yet, bring Maybe the Moon.

coloskier
08-15-2007, 09:23 AM
Personally I think all trash talkers in any sport should have my racket fully implanted in their forehead. ;)

Hidious
08-15-2007, 01:08 PM
After an error from your opponent: "Damn, how can you keep your calm after a shot like this? I usually throw my racquet when i play like that."

SlapShot
08-15-2007, 01:27 PM
My personal favorite when someone hits an ace/winner:

"That's cute. Try and do it again."

Pistol_Pete
08-15-2007, 06:39 PM
When playing doubles, say to the other team that they must like each other a lot because they're always in 'love'.

Dink
08-15-2007, 06:56 PM
Dear Dink,

Your avatar is beyond lame. Chris Duhon is the most worthless POS in the NBA. If I were Paxon I would try to trade him for like a future third round pick and a Snickers bar. Probably isn't worth that even. I can't believe he ever got into Duke, not that they are any good cuz they suck as bad as Duhon. My VCU Rams sent their asses packing Round 1.

I am aware that Chris Duhon sucks. Being from Slidell, however, I have no choice but to like the guy.

http://www.shamsports.com/content/pages/playerProfiles/profileDisplay.jsp?id=54

cj011
08-23-2007, 12:33 PM
This is what I do. It's more along the quiet type but it really gets in peoples head. Play with an old *** beat up racquet. When you sit down next to your opponent ask them you their racquet and then get the discussion on your racquet. Throw in the comment "that there is something about hitting aces and blowing winners by people with an old *** racquet."

TENNIS_IS_FUN
08-27-2007, 09:11 PM
a simple "F*CK YOU." always does the trick for me.

dave333
08-28-2007, 06:08 AM
^^^Not very creative....

smoothtennis
08-28-2007, 07:30 AM
LOL! I had a good one pulled on me and my partner this weekend against some really good doubles guys. I don't know if he meant it to be trash talk, because they are both great personalities, and much fun to play against.

We were serving, and my partner double faults. The opponent, hollers over the net, "No, no, take another two, take em!" and sets up to return. LOL!!!
How GOOD IS THAT?

I am smiling like...I remembered this thread and started laughing. My partner is like, "are you nutz?...forget it." And then he starts laughing.

PS. These were older guys, and clearly better at doubles than us.

smoothtennis
08-28-2007, 07:36 AM
So in a tourney a few weeks ago, my opponent was yelling, "Come on!" like Hewitt, no kidding---after only two games in the match. He did this three times in two games. I am like this is going to be a long day, LOL. I actually went up to the net with a laugh, and said, "Isn't it a little early to be doing Hewitt already?" He didn't know what to say, and just kind of laughed.

Well later, after I was rolling him 5-2, and served an ace up the T, I yelled out to him, "Can I get a Come ON! now?!" I swear to everyone here...the USTA umpire standing at the net laughed out loud! It just came to me...yes, true story. It was all in good fun, hehe.

daveyboy
08-28-2007, 08:57 AM
Here's how I trash talk....
















Get it? Remember, grasshopper, silence is deafening.

Ambivalent
08-28-2007, 05:49 PM
When playing doubles: "Looks like your mom isnt gonna be the only one to get hit by my balls today."

Lol that was lame and i just made it up right now.

BounceHitBounceHit
08-28-2007, 06:05 PM
This is a little tongue in cheek of course but there are times when I could a bit of an edge and I think a little trash talk helps ease the tension on the courts during a friendly game.

So what is some of the trash you guys like to throw out there? :)

Try mixing in some 'junk' or 'trash' with your shots. It works a whole lot better than all the jawing in the world................ ;) CC

samster
08-28-2007, 06:09 PM
Try mixing in some 'junk' or 'trash' with your shots. It works a whole lot better than all the jawing in the world................ ;) CC

Agreed, definitely throwing a junkball or two!

I recommend it, that's what I do.

califsurferboy33
08-29-2007, 04:05 PM
how to distract the openent...tie one shoe while hes up at the line, then the other, then when hes getting ready to serve say wait, fix your strings, then when hes getting ready to serve scream wait...and then say o shoot thought there was a ball there, and then everytime he hits a fault yell fault and anytime he hits the ball out say OUT and call the serve when hes serving lol

Ambivalent
08-29-2007, 11:36 PM
call the serve when hes serving lol

That would be grounds to call a let, no?

Breaker
08-30-2007, 12:03 AM
So in a tourney a few weeks ago, my opponent was yelling, "Come on!" like Hewitt, no kidding---after only two games in the match. He did this three times in two games. I am like this is going to be a long day, LOL. I actually went up to the net with a laugh, and said, "Isn't it a little early to be doing Hewitt already?" He didn't know what to say, and just kind of laughed.

Well later, after I was rolling him 5-2, and served an ace up the T, I yelled out to him, "Can I get a Come ON! now?!" I swear to everyone here...the USTA umpire standing at the net laughed out loud! It just came to me...yes, true story. It was all in good fun, hehe.

When playing Lleyton-wannabes who "come on" even when they go for a sip of water, I'll usually keep quiet until beating them at the end of the match, then get down on one knee, stare at them and throw in a "come on" of my own with the vicht thrown in. Mixed reactions from doing that little bit haha.

Noveson
08-30-2007, 12:58 AM
I watched a guy a few days ago. He gave me some really good ideas, here were the things he did.

* Whenever he got a volley that was going to be a winner, he would look away right before he hit it.

* One time he got a really weak lob, he actually turned away from the ball when he saw it, and was walking back when he decided to go back and crush it.

* If there was a ball on the court he would pick it up during the middle of the point.

* He would roll his eyes whenever the other guy hit a winner, and once said 'could you get any luckier.'

Now remember this was a close match. And that is exactly how to be a complete jackass.