Can someone Review My College Essays please?

Discussion in 'Odds & Ends' started by Roy125, Nov 17, 2011.

  1. Roy125

    Roy125 Professional

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    I'm in desperate need of other people to review my college essays. If you're willing, I can send you it for you to review through P.M.
     
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  2. Agent Orynge

    Agent Orynge Professional

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    I'm sure your school has a writing center, replete with tutors and professors you can make appointments with, all at your disposal.
     
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  3. MarinaHighTennis

    MarinaHighTennis Professional

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    I'll look at it if its an analytical essay but if its the personal statement one... sorry
     
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  4. Roy125

    Roy125 Professional

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    Yeah thanksgiving break is next week, so I'm a little inconvenienced.

    @MarinaHighTennis: it is the personal statement one, but it isn't anything hard to review or anything like that. I'm just looking for if my essay follows the prompt and if it does reveal my personality/goals.
     
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  5. LuckyR

    LuckyR Legend

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    You didn't just buy one over the net? How quaint...
     
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  6. Agent Orynge

    Agent Orynge Professional

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    Procrastination will do that.
     
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  7. r2473

    r2473 Legend

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    I'll do it for $100.

    Do you want the "Simon Cowell" or the "Paula Abdul" review?
     
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  8. Roy125

    Roy125 Professional

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    I've done this for a month.
     
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  9. Agent Orynge

    Agent Orynge Professional

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    Success is all about time management. Know your strengths as well as your weaknesses. If you know it will take you a month to write an essay, you should plan backwards from when you want it to be complete (not due), and begin there. My point is that you should have started 5 or 6 weeks ago, not 4.

    Nothing personal, but I feel no pity for people who put themselves in this sort of position. If you get the help you need, then good for you. If not, take it as one of life's lessons and learn from it.

    Also, this probably isn't the appropriate venue for your request (which was the point of my first post). Your seemingly random use of capitalization in the subject title does not strike me as being particularly auspicious, either.
     
    Last edited: Nov 17, 2011
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  10. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    These requirements are vestiges of a previous era and should be eliminated. These days students attend college mainly for negative reasons, i.e., without a college degree it is difficult to get a good-paying job.

    It is like asking a tennis player to write an essay about why he wants to learn to serve.
     
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  11. mikeler

    mikeler G.O.A.T.

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    If you do the "Paula Abdul" review, please post for public consumption.
     
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  12. Nuke

    Nuke Hall of Fame

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    Can someone please paint my house?

    Do your own damn homework.
     
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  13. Jonahan

    Jonahan Rookie

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    I'll do it. PM me.
     
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  14. Roy125

    Roy125 Professional

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    Time management does not cause success. To think so is post-hoc and is a logical fallacy. I can spend a year on the essays and still ask TT this. To assume that I can exactly predict when I am done with an essay is also fallacious.

    I don't need pity right now; I need help. I have 13 days to do so, and so I'm fairly confident that I will get others to help me even if you refuse to.

    Btw, to analyze the capitalization of a title and to ignore the essay itself reflects incompetency.
     
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  15. Roy125

    Roy125 Professional

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    I already did it. Can you look over it to see if I did it well?

    Did you see what I did there?
     
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  16. Agent Orynge

    Agent Orynge Professional

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    First of all, there's nothing fallacious about what I've said. Second of all, this isn't Argumentation 101, so you can check the wikipedia cut-and-paste at the door.

    Now, you're confusing the concept of importance with causality. I never inferred that time management was the only deciding factor for success, but it's certainly paramount. Look at how you conduct the rest of your life. Do you backwards plan for school in the morning? Do you wake up with enough time to shower, eat breakfast, brush your teeth, drive to school? What about work? Do you adjust the rest of your schedule to account for traffic? These are all habits that succesful adults cultivate, because without them, they would fail in their endeavors. Writing is no different. If you still don't see the importance of time management, then you have a lot of growing up to do.

    That having been said, I also mentioned that you should know both your strengths and your weaknesses. As an example, I know that it would take me only a handful of hours to write an A quality essay, supposing it was only one to two thousand words. I don't mention this to boast, but to prove a point. If I know in advance what I'm capable of, I can afford to wait until the last minute. If it was a paper that I thought I might need someone to proof read, I would make sure to write that paper at least several days in advance, and not wait until the last minute to engage others for their assistance. I certainly wouldn't put myself in a position to depend on total strangers. If you're college bound, and you have any ambition of succeeding in the realm of academia, I strongly recommend you develop of an idea of what you're capable of, and quick. Try telling a professor that you couldn't predict how long it would take you to write an essay and see what happens.

    Finally, I'm more than capable of judging both your character and aptitude by your writing, even by as little as just the title. Effective communication is all about meticulousness. Everything that I write, whether it be a text message, a forum post, or an academic essay, receives the same amount of attention to detail. That's because I understand the written word does not implicitly convey the same thing that vocal inflection and visible mannerisms do. Where you place a comma, or where you choose to capitalize, can completely change the tone of your post (or essay). My point about the thread title was that you seemed to lack decisiveness, or perhaps just consistency. It's really not absurd to think that such unwanted habits might have crept into the rest of your writing. Anyways, I'm not really sure what it is that you think I'm 'incompetent' at, but I'd like to think that what I've displayed here proves I'm quite the opposite.
     
    Last edited: Nov 17, 2011
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  17. CLL

    CLL New User

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    It's best if you go to college confidential to ask for people to review your essays.
     
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  18. rdis10093

    rdis10093 Hall of Fame

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    posts like these make me smile. thanks guys, and to the op, best of wishes.
     
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  19. Roy125

    Roy125 Professional

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    Actually, this IS English 101, or actually AP English language. I didn't wiki that information. That is assumption number one that you've made which lacks veracity.

    "Success is all about time management." From this statement you've indicated that all of success is time management. A logical conclusion that could be derived then, is that without time management, success is impossible. Therefore, time management causes success. If that wasn't your purpose in writing that statement, then I would suggest removing the vague and quite contradictory statements in your post so that your audience (me) doesn't misunderstand your points. You say that you "never inferred that time management was the only deciding factor for success." However, your previous statement says otherwise. Rule of thumb: never use absolutes such as "all," "never," "always." Qualify your claims.

    I've started the essays weeks before they were due. So yes, I did plan ahead, and I knew that I needed others to proofread the paper. So yes, I did plan this out and still have more than a week left to submit the two essays.

    The arrangement of text only serves to complement the details of the text itself. Not the other way around. Forgive me because I do find your conclusions from my title to be non-sequiters. To think that I lack decisiveness and consistency from your viewing of seven words proves my point. Furthermore, you've already destroyed your ethos by your illogical conclusions and your contradictory statements. That has ruined your image of a prudent judge of writing.
     
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  20. Manus Domini

    Manus Domini Hall of Fame

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    Roy, as someone else going through the college process, I don't feel comfortable reviewing your work. But you really wouldn't want me to, anyway. I have a habit of believing anything follows a prompt one way or another, but I am fixing that issue gradually.

    I suggest you go to one of those free essay-editing organizations. There are a few. But don't just trust everyone on a tennis forum cause it's TT; trust those you know will offer valuable advice.
     
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  21. Agent Orynge

    Agent Orynge Professional

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    You're right, I assumed you'd be able to figure out that 'success is all about time management' was vernacular and not technical gospel. Twisting this into a battle of semantics does not suddenly invalidate my logic or ethos, however. Believe whatever you want about my ability to judge your writing, I can still see right through you. I only wish that you were as confident about your own writing as you seem to be about mine, so that we might never have had to go through this business in the first place. I do like your 'rule of thumb,' by the way (which doesn't at all strike me as a perfect candidate for cut-and-paste). I mean, it's cliche, but maybe I'll use it the next time I have to take a multiple choice test...

    Anyways, if you planned this out weeks in advance, and asking people on this message board was part of that plan, then your judgment is less sound than I previously gave you credit for. Meanwhile, I call shenanigans.
     
    Last edited: Nov 17, 2011
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  22. Agent Orynge

    Agent Orynge Professional

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    Are you still angry over the HYDRA incident in Norway?

    You're right, of course. Coming to a tennis message board, declaring that you need help, and then insisting that it's too late to use the proper resources because you waited until Thanksgiving "isn't procrastinating in the least." By the way, I do know how long it takes me to write every essay - or study, or anything else for that matter. Maybe it's because I'm older and more experienced, or maybe I'm just flat out better than either of you. I'll leave that up to you to decide.
     
    Last edited: Nov 18, 2011
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  23. Manus Domini

    Manus Domini Hall of Fame

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    Do you mean the sabotage of Norsk Hydro? If not, then I don't know what you are referring to...

    I'd say you're just more experienced. As you, omniscient as you are, already know, the brain doesn't fully develop until many years after one turns 18. At the same time, you may just be better organized. Doesn't mean you are better than either of us.

    I mean, look at Beethovan. I doubt anyone would consider him less than more organized composers, and he was one huge mess.

    Plus, time management is taught in college. Almost every tour guide I've had poor time management coming into college, but gained it by sophomore year.

    So, in short, you aren't better than we are because you have time-management (presuming Roy doesn't, I know I don't).
     
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  24. Agent Orynge

    Agent Orynge Professional

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    Time management is just one of those life skills, and not everyone develops it succesfully. But you're right, it often comes with experience. I learned it in the military, where being in the right place at the right time was pretty much my number one priority (doing what I was told was a close second). I'm confident you both will get there, if you haven't already. Understand that my original point(s) here were not to berate, but to impart the importance of such qualities in whatever your chosen fields.
     
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  25. rdis10093

    rdis10093 Hall of Fame

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    as much as you guys argue and post ,the paper could have been done already.
     
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  26. Agent Orynge

    Agent Orynge Professional

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    That's OP's concern, not mine.
     
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  27. flyinghippos101

    flyinghippos101 Legend

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    I have a philosophy paper based on utilitarianism and a history paper on cortes and raleigh due in three days. Because I was too busy getting hammered last weekend and playing Skyrim the past few days, I haven't had the time to get around to it unfortunately.

    If you guys could be so kind enough to submit paragraphs for me to use, that would be great. Just shoot me a PM!
     
    #27
  28. r2473

    r2473 Legend

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    I suspect that while getting hammered, you brought great joy to those around you. Probably in the early morning hours, you brought great pleasure to both yourself and "someone special".

    Greatest good for the greatest number. You are a living utilitarian. Just blog about your weekend and send a link to your philosophy professor.

    As far as raleigh, do you smoke when you drink? You can thank walter for that. That could cover 2 pages itself. Maybe you had a snickers? Cortez loved his chocolate.

    Done and done.
     
    Last edited: Nov 18, 2011
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  29. Magic of tennis

    Magic of tennis Semi-Pro

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    lol you are hillarious. I had to write thesis for graduate school few years aog. I had a real hard time. Someone who I hired to check my writing was supposed to be future-writer but he wasn't. He was doing odd things for living :evil:
    He did correct somewhat and I passed. So, I paid him + bonus. Since I passed I didn't care he did good job or not.
     
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