Drama in Women's League?

Discussion in 'Adult League & Tournament Talk' started by PinkTennisNinja, Aug 2, 2010.

  1. PinkTennisNinja

    PinkTennisNinja Rookie

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    This is really just an "in general" question. Is there just as much drama in men's league than there is in women's? Or is area specific? I haven't been involved in the whole area drama (just some with my previous team) but from what I heard there has been drama in the past(not recently I don't think though). What kind of drama have you encountered?

    Just a question :)
     
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  2. r2473

    r2473 Legend

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    We generally stick with some of the more popular Shakespearean dramas, but we do occasionally perform Aeschylus and Sophocles.
     
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  3. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    OK, now you're just showin' off.
     
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  4. max

    max Hall of Fame

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    I noticed as a tournament director that not so many women actually liked to compete. My wife believes this is because they don't want a real record of their performance/ability. . . and many don't want to be "looked at" or watched during a competitive game.
     
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  5. decades

    decades Guest

    drama when women get "together"? :-?
     
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  6. JoelDali

    JoelDali G.O.A.T.

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    In between matches at District finals I only noticed women calling the other women fat, or 'spider legs'.

    It was brutal.

    The guys were all great, we even shook hands and shared man huggs with our most heated adversaries and shared a beer.
     
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  7. pyrokid

    pyrokid Hall of Fame

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    I do notice that at tournaments, the guys all hang out in a big group, and women split into groups of two or three.
    The girls who are in the group with the guys are pretty chill.
    I have no idea about the others though.
     
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  8. Tarboro

    Tarboro Rookie

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    Retrospect seems to inflate drama. To hear some of the old-timers on my team tell it, our local non-USTA (guys') league was a hotbed of intrigue and gamesmanship 10-15 years ago.
     
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  9. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    I usually don't stand and watch my players if I finish my match early, and there are some players I make sure I put on the other side of the building if I am in charge of court assignments. Some people are exquisitely sensitive to being watched, and part of the tension could be that I'm the captain.

    So I give them their space.

    Personally, I don't play tennis because I "like to compete." I like to play well, win or lose. The "competing" is necessary because unless you keep score and play actual matches, you can't gauge whether you are in fact improving.

    I wouldn't say that women don't like to compete, though. I have only had two women in all the time I have been captaining say they wouldn't join the team because they don't like to compete.
     
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  10. dizzlmcwizzl

    dizzlmcwizzl Hall of Fame

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    Yes, I think it is unfair to say women dont (or dont want to) compete. In general I believe women are less likely to do things which, I as a man, view as being competitive but I think that is a perception issue.

    In my oppinion men, in general, enjoy competing with each other and measure their improvement against another player. Whereas I find women generally compete more within themselves.

    Of course I am a man so what do I know!
     
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  11. PinkTennisNinja

    PinkTennisNinja Rookie

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    We don't have many people on our team that don't like to be watched. We're all very loud, energetic people that loves when our team cheers for us :) and I agree with you on the competing issue. I play because I LOVE tennis :) and I'm very competitive because I LOVE to win as well hahaha. If anything I think the amount of competitiveness is what causes the drama around here. Ladies around here don't like to lose haha :)
     
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  12. tennislefty

    tennislefty New User

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    i think the drama from women is not about the competition or not wanting to compete, heck my players love to compete! the drama comes because MOST (I say most, because ive captained over 30 teams in 8 years) women do not know the pecking order on the teams in which they play on. Most women overate themselves and most men underate themselves. some drama queens in women in doubles want a partner who is better than them. The classic line "i need a better partner to bring out my best game", sure! dont we all? or I need someone who can run! heck me too thats why i run! drama at its best comes on the most competative teams that play the same strongest best players each and every match and the weaker players dont support them. sometimes the stronger player at 50 % is still better than the weaker player at 100%. drama is when ladies look at what others get and them dont get from a team. i think being a captain of a womens team is worth over a million dollars.better yet its priceless!
     
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  13. polski

    polski Semi-Pro

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    There is way more drama in our area surrounding the women's leagues. If one woman doesn't get asked to be on the "good" team, she'll become hell bent trying to creat her own dynasty.

    Our men's leagues are more competitive on the court while the women's league is competitive from the time the captains meeting ends until matches start.

    I do play mixed, but I can't say I enjoy it. I play with the women that I get along with & I try to avoid interacting with the other team's females.
     
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  14. PinkTennisNinja

    PinkTennisNinja Rookie

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    Holy crap, where are you from!!!??? This:

    sounds exactly like my area!! hahaha however when we get on the court we're all very friendly :twisted: haha
     
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  15. penpal

    penpal Rookie

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    Harking back to my Sociology classes in college, I think that men and women both deal with the same feelings and issues, but tend to handle situations a bit differently primarily because men are raised in an environment where physical confrontation is much more likely than it is for a woman.

    So, when women feel anger and frustration, they more freely express it openly because they don't have much fear of a confrontation escalating to a physical nature (hence creating said drama), whereas men have learned to suppress their verbal output to avoid the threat of escalating to a physical fight.

    Then again, college was long ago, so I could be totally off base here :)
     
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  16. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    "Tennis Dynasty." Boy, that strikes a nerve.

    That's exactly what happens among the captains. Not only are the players hell bent on establishing a reputation as the biggest, baddest player on the block, we have the captains trying to create a Tennis Dynasty.

    It's a difficult subject. I'm a captain, and it is crazy important to me to have a good reputation in the league. I don't want people thinking I lie, cheat or went off my meds, either on or off the court. I want folks to be happy to the extent I have any control over that. I want players interested in being on my teams. If a big chunk of players left and started their own gig because they were unhappy, I would consider it a significant personal failure.

    I can see the allure of the Dynasty, though. If you have captained a while, people will "recognize" you. Maybe that satisfies something in some people. As in I. Am. Somebody.

    I'm not out to create the Sphinx Dynasty, and I hope I never get to that place. I'm hoping to use my Fifteen Minutes Of Fame for something else! :)
     
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  17. Taxvictim

    Taxvictim Semi-Pro

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    I cannot watch my wife's matches because there is too much drama, both on and off the court. If you are a woman, don't ever fail to show up at any gathering of women or you will be the target of their nasty barbs. If you are a female team captain and three of your team members are together somewhere, they are complaining about you. (Here in the South, they will add the phrase "bless her heart" after every insult. "She can't get a simple match organized, bless her heart." "She's oblivious to past results, bless her heart.")

    We have this great men's program at our club where 28 men show up at the same time each week and play rotating doubles. The next week you move up and down the courts playing different men, depending on how you did the week before. The women have tried to start the same program several times, and it always fails. This year, the women started it, and immediately several of the women on one court wanted to move their play time to some other time they liked better. They totally missed the point of the whole thing. Whatever good things men create, women put asunder. If some of you women didn't look so hot in your tennis garb, we men would probably refuse to speak to you on the courts.

    Men are From Mars; Women Are F'in Nuts.

    Okay, I'm strapping on my helmet, making a big bowl of popcorn, and sitting back ready to see what happens now.
     
    Last edited: Aug 3, 2010
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  18. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    You're not painting a very nice picture of Southern women.

    I work out every morning with a group of about 20 women. I have been on dozens of women's tennis teams.

    The things you say about women running their friends into the ground behind their backs are not true of the women I hang with. If it were, I would find some new people to hang with.
     
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  19. JoelDali

    JoelDali G.O.A.T.

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    One word: Pam Shriver
     
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  20. Taxvictim

    Taxvictim Semi-Pro

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    I'm talking about women who are part of a team. Something about that makes them crazy. When they're all just hanging out, it's not the same.

    On the other hand, have you ever heard this? "If you can't figure out who the sucker is at the poker table, it's you."
     
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  21. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    I dunno. My tennis pals and I are part of a team. I can't imagine what would happen if someone busted out with nasty comments about someone who couldn't make practice that day. People would probably escort her to the shade on the assumption she had been out in the sun too long.

    Your wife's friends sound very catty and immature.
     
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  22. Taxvictim

    Taxvictim Semi-Pro

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    Yep, that's what I think. They weren't friends before they formed a team.

    You know, one thing different here is that for all of the women, this is their very first year playing USTA teams. Most are beginners, since the teams are 2.5 and 3.0. Maybe that's the difference. Over time, these folks probably get weeded out and the teams have more cohesion.
     
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  23. gameboy

    gameboy Hall of Fame

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    Yes, we may have fewer problems with hanging out with other men, but we do have problems with counting...
     
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  24. SB

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    Probably more in women's league, but in my experience, there is also a difference between women who have played team sports and those who haven't. That's a generalization and it's not 100% by any means, but I can often tell who is more of an individual sport person and who has played team sports. Someone who hasn't played many sports and is just picking up tennis as an adult is often harder to deal with than someone who played, say, basketball at a collegiate level.

    (Now, I'm speaking as a captain, and not addressing normal cattiness attributable to women in general .. .mostly drama surrounding the team or lineups or the like.)

    The good news is that I think this is changing (as much as it can) as team sports for girls are more prevalent than they were 30 years ago ... I think women will be more understanding that they are PART of the team, not just an individual who happens to be on a team. It's definitely a balancing act.

    They'll still gossip, though. ;-)
     
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  25. Angle Queen

    Angle Queen Professional

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    Gosh, I must play on some boring (womens) teams. There ain't a whole heck of a lot of drama. Our biggest sticking point this season was what color team shirt to pick. LOL.

    No, the real drama at our club came with some married (to each other) mixed doubles partners that did some re-partnering. Ouch.

    But I do know there's some cattiness and long memories inherent to a collection of women. Men just seem to blow up at each other and get over it.
     
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  26. PinkTennisNinja

    PinkTennisNinja Rookie

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    I think the drama around here stops when you hit 4.0 but most of those women are older than the 3.0s and 3.5s....maybe it's age and has nothing to do with tennis haha. The only drama I was involved in was actually really stupid. I was told that when we went to State I was basically too prepared. They didn't like that I was trying to set up everything (carpool, hotel, etc.) when no one else had done it and we only had a week till State. Then we won our first 4 matches and everyone was okay with the lineups. Then when we lost our 1 match everyone blamed me even though I had asked what they wanted to do for the lineup and had used the one the team voted on. I learned my lesson. haha. Since then I've left that team and they are NOT happy but I sure am :) I found a new tennis family :)
     
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  27. SB

    SB Rookie

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    I think maybe they're not weeded out so much as they just figure things out. Some might get weeded, but most people are reasonable and realize when they are being idiots. Eventually.

    Whoever said the drama lessens as the NTRP ratings rise, yes, that is true, as far as I've seen. Again, I think it has to do with experience with sport. Most 4.5s and 5.0s I know have spent a lot of time playing some sport or the other, or multiples, and know that opponents and teammates alike are just other athletes like they are, not enemies or threats.

    And (most of all) I think they realize that USTA tennis is pretty minor stuff, especially if they've played big-time college sports. But for 2.5, this might be the biggest competition they've been in, so it seems more important.
     
    Last edited: Aug 4, 2010
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