Greatest Post You May Ever Read, Tell Everyone

Discussion in 'Tennis Tips/Instruction' started by ttwarrior1, Apr 26, 2005.

  1. ttwarrior1

    ttwarrior1 Professional

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    i took over today as coach against another team. Our coach couldnt make the trip as he was away on a mission , since he is a minister also.
    This is what i did. We were playing the top ranked team in the state. We are last if they had a rank for that.
    Our #1 seed cant beat their #1 seed or even the other teams #2 seed. So i decided to make our worst player the #1 seed. I decided if their guy can beat our #1 guy without a doubt then why not just make it a cheap victory.

    I put our second worst player as the #2 seed.

    Yes both got beat 6-0 6-0

    HERES WHERE THE FUN BEGINS.

    The team, coach were were playing all thought they were gonna play our top 2 guys at 1 and 2. He confronts me and I blew him a kiss and laughed. Everyone is now in shock. I lined up my players and we all did the Ric Flair strut and said WHOOOOOO!!!!!!

    I Made our best player the #3 seed, and out second best player the #4 seed and our 3rd best playe the #5 seed.

    Guess what happened . We won 3 to 2. ha ha ha ha!!

    I did the same thing with the girls, and in doubles .

    Everyone there was fuming. The coaches , parents. We were the visiting team and there were around 200 or so there spread out .

    People calling us cheaters, names and everything you can think of.

    I mean the guy i had at #1 is a rookie thats only been playing like a week and cant even get it over the net sometimes if you hit it straight too him.
    I mean the punk millionaire kid he was playing was like WTF.

    He figured it out later when he saw our best guy beating up their #3 seed.

    We've played this team every year since 1976 and havent even won ten matches total i don't think until i took over.
    The players on the other team were crying , even some of the parents. They said they were gonna ban us from local tourneys. Turn us into the commissioner. I said go ahead and tell him that we kicked your teams buttocks. THE BEST TEAM WON

    Okay i weigh 320 , closer to 350 actuallly and for some reason the coach challenges me to a match. Yes he is better than me but not by alot. I was pumped, motivated. WE had both teams, parents, cops. People running around everywhere. People pulling over trying to figure out what was going on.

    Yes he called everyshot i hit on the line out and im like okay, dont even blink and accept it. He was acting like a wild animal during the match . So i decide to start serving to the middle so he cant call my shots out . I served like 80 percent first serve. I was having trouble with his serve so i did more drop shots . He won the 1st set 6-4. I won the second set coming back from 4-0 to win 6-4 . We then did a ten pt tie breaker. First person to 10 win by 2. He was up 9-0 and give up . I then just go for , get two aces. 9-2. I then get two winners 9-4. Still upset knowing im gonna lose. I then get two errors from him on my serve. 9-6. I then get two big time lucky winners from the tape and a miss hit. 9-8. I then get an another winner. I end up winning 24-22 . The team picks me up and carries me off the court. He slams his 300 racket down and breaks it. I mean we celebrated for like 15 minutes. We kept telling stories about the matches we played. WE couldnt stop laughing.
    WE decided to to to mcdonalds but after we won we decided its time to go to Golden Corral.
    GUESS WHAT HAPPENS. OTHER TEAM SHOWS UP . MORE COMING
     
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  2. aj_m2009

    aj_m2009 Professional

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    That was a smart move with the team IMO, good job!!! And that story was freakin' hilarious lol. :lol:
     
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  3. Ken

    Ken Rookie

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    LOL! I started laughing halfway through, it WAS freakin hilarious. They have punk millionnaires for #1 seeds where you live, too? The last two teams I played were filled with them, too.

    They can't turn you in to the commissioner just for changing the lineup. They just lost, rofl. And 24-22...nice tiebreaker. I want to hear about you meeting the other team, good job.
     
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  4. jeebeesus

    jeebeesus Guest

    Hey buddy it`s not like i dont believe u,but can u post something for us to see? I`d really like to see a 320lb guy move and play tennis. No offence.
     
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  5. kevhen

    kevhen Hall of Fame

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    My old 3.5 USTA team captain used to do that alot moving the best doubles team to #2 or even #3 to guarantee a team win. We finished 2nd at the Regionals justing missing going to Nationals. We got to the finals by switching me from #1 singles to #2 since the other team had done the same to us the first time we played them. This time we won both singles matches.

    I think it's all legal, and not a bad strategy if you want to win. I know I prefer to play #1 on my 4.0 team to go up against the opposing team's best player (although not always do I play their best) but if the captain thinks we can win the meet by switching things around then I am all for it.
     
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  6. Geezer Guy

    Geezer Guy Hall of Fame

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    In some leagues what you did is illegal. In some leagues you're required to play your best player in Position #1, second best in #2, etc. Each coach is on their honor to line up their team that way. Obviously, I don't know about your league specifically.

    As for getting in a big grudge match against their coach - I find that really hard to believe. That sounds incredibly immature. You guys are adults - you're supposed to be a role model for your team. Just shake hands and walk away.
     
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  7. Indiantwist

    Indiantwist Semi-Pro

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    But isnt Best player a subjective word. For example if i have two kids of almost identical calibre, depending on the opponent, the day, etc etc either of them can be best. So the best player decision is left to the Coach.

    In our league i beat so many players and i am probably one of the top 3. However i almost always loose to a S & V guy. For many he is not even an opposition worth worrying about. If we both are on same team, by winning % he would get pciked. However on a skill and consistency level i would be picked.

    The point iam driving is "best player" is a subjective word and i am not sure how any1 can deem it illegal.
     
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  8. ohplease

    ohplease Professional

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    It's called stacking, and it's not very sporting. Most leagues with experience with the practice respond by specifically outlawing it.

    However, I do know of one league that responded by allowing substitutions. Your #1 loses quick, then their #1 comes over and pulls out the matches being played in the lower positions. It helped that the guy who went around essentially single-handedly winning all his team's matches was anti-stacking with a point to prove.
     
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  9. coach

    coach Semi-Pro

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    In our high school league (Los Angeles), we sign at the bottom of our line-up card that we have put our players "in order of decreasing strength from top to bottom."
    As far as the rest of the grudge match story, methinks you are practicing for your creative writing night class at the junior college, which is not to say I didn't enjoy it, a few of us have played with the truth a little for entertainment purposes. :D
     
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  10. mikemasonx

    mikemasonx New User

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    I really don't know why anyone is giving you any praise at all (aj and ken). That is by far the worst action I've ever heard of taken by any type of coach. First, stacking is illegal as hell. You can't say "the best team won" because you didn't. You cheated. If you had put your players where they were supposed to be and won, that would of been something to tell people about. But you didn't. And the second part, why the hell would the other coach challenge you? and why the hell would you accept it? You obviously have no class and no respect for the sport. You sound like a 12-year-old who decided to sit down and make up a story that you thought people would like. I honestly can't believe this story has any factual information at all.
     
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  11. remilard

    remilard New User

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    Stacking has been frowned upon everywhere I've played.

    The thing I don't get is why the team of millionaires was eating at Golden Corral.
     
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  12. atatu

    atatu Hall of Fame

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    This is very believable, especially the part about people pulling over to watch a 350 pound coach play.
     
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  13. POGO

    POGO Hall of Fame

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    ttwarrior,

    Would you post a pic of yourself? I haven't seen a 350 lbs competing tennis player before
     
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  14. supersmash

    supersmash Semi-Pro

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    HAHAHA, mad props.
     
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  15. USCfan

    USCfan Professional

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    That is definitely stacking, I hate it...I lost twice this year at no. 2 to kids that should have been playing no. 1...
     
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  16. USCfan

    USCfan Professional

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    I believe you can play well, but how the hell did your team lift you up? You got a bunch of lifters or what?
     
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  17. POGO

    POGO Hall of Fame

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    Hhahahahah...I was just thinking that. Did the girls tennis team also help to pick you up? Hhahahahahha.
     
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  18. tykrum

    tykrum Rookie

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    This is the exact post that I wanted to write. The writer has to be in HS to have people that can't hit the ball over the net. If that is true, I can't believe that the #1 ranked team in the state, playing against the writer's winless team, wouldn't have 5 guys better than the writer's #1. I know when I was in HS, we were one of the top 5 teams in the state, and we could have gotten rid of our 10 person varsity and trotted out our JV and beat 3 or 4 of the teams in our very good conference.
     
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  19. antontd

    antontd Semi-Pro

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    ttwarrior1, later you were challenged by aliens, I guess...
     
    #19
  20. roger2016

    roger2016 New User

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    hmm... the comment about stacking and how some kids are playing a little lower when they should be playing higher... There's a school that we played recently and this wasn't even the best in the state, (we aren't too bad ourselves), but their 4 doubles JV can beat our 2 dubs varsity... and we got swept. They weren't stacking, they were just good. Yeah, so back to the topic.

    In a sense it's dirty and bad sportsmanship, but why not make it interesting instead of just a sweep? But the guy that was supposed to be playing #5 played #1 right? and you said he couldn't even hit the ball over the net? How is he #5?! Do you only have like 5 people? but seriously, have you looked at it through their eyes? What if you were playing on that team and their coach just cheated you out of a win? What if you're afraid you're not going to make it to state because you just lost to the worst team around? "Now that's a Tuffy"
     
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  21. paulfreda

    paulfreda Hall of Fame

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    IMO stacking is unethical cheating.
    Why didn't you just put your #1 at the #6 spot and #2 at 5 for ceertain wins ?

    In the US, life is so competitive that many believe winning is everything even when it is not your profession and money is not at stake. Very sad. Whatever happened to playing for the love of the game. Maybe you'd sell your soul for a championship ??

    Personal story; I was #1 on my golf team in high school. We had to play the conference champs and really had no chance to win. So coach wanted me to play at #3. I came in that morning and told the coach ...."Coach, I wanna play Watson (their #1)." Inside I felt it was wrong moving me down to get a few points. He said OK. Well I played the round of my life and took 2.5 points of 3 from him. It was one of the thrills of my life that I will never forget.
     
    #21
  22. theace21

    theace21 Hall of Fame

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    Great coaching, you must be really proud of yourself...Send the sacrifical lamb to get killed against the number one player...

    The number one player on you team doesn't want to test himself against the best...

    Great attitude, why don't you just call every ball they hit out...

    The league and your school should suspend your head coach - that will teach him from missing a match and trusting someone to do the right thing...

    Coaches that stack make me sick. Luckly the leagues and coaches around this area have more class. Good luck the rest of the season, hope you get what you deserve...
     
    #22
  23. ChipNCharge

    ChipNCharge Professional

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    I play in a doubles league in the fall that prevents stacking. Each team match consists of four lines of doubles. Each line has a weighted point system. A win at line #1 is 4 points, line #2 is 3 points, #3 is 2 points, and a line #4 win is 1 point. One point is also awarded for each set won (each line is the best two out of three sets). So if my partner and I won at line #3 in a three set match, our team would get 4 points for that line (2 for the win and 2 for winning two sets) and our opponent would get 1 point for the one set they won. If one team swept the other team by winning every set of each of the four lines, they would win 18-0.

    Chip
     
    #23
  24. 0.2RatedPlayer

    0.2RatedPlayer Rookie

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    that strategy is hilarious.
     
    #24
  25. Thomas

    Thomas Rookie

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    Don't stack, and don't go to Golden Corral when you weigh 350 pounds.
     
    #25
  26. Power Game

    Power Game Professional

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    Stacking huh... well I hope you feel good about cheating to win. Says alot about you and your team...
     
    #26
  27. Dedans Penthouse

    Dedans Penthouse Hall of Fame

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    "I am the Walrus, coo-coo-ca-chew coo-coo-ca-chew"

    320 pounds?? Sounds like you're as adept at STACKING PANCAKES as you are matches.

    Even though "stacking" is a really low-rent move, fortunately this thread appears to be so implausible that it seems like all it's missing is an April 1st "start" date---you actually mean to say that not only was the opposing team crying, but "some of the PARENTS were CRYING" as well?!! And that cops, that is, POLICE OFFICERS, OFFICERS OF THE LAW actually stopped to watch YOUR match??! Now I could maybe see cops from the show "Animal Rescue 911" from the Animal Planet TV Network would want to check out your "Dancing Bear & Tennis Racquet" act, but the local fuzz??~! Nah! I don't think so....oh and to top it off, you supposedly came back from a 9-ZERO deficit to pull off a Poncho Gonzalez 24-22 type victory? Yep.

    "Alex, I'd like Bullsh!t for 500 please."

    Also, the "bratty millionaire kids" reference sounds too much like an Adam Sandler-wannabe (Happy Gilmore-esque) pipedream of sorts. Nice story, but it seems that all you forgot to include in this "believeable" story was to somehow have the "mousey" librarian morph into a sexy "swan" by removing her eyeglasses, shaking the French bun out of her hair while walking up to you and claiming that she's secretly admired you from afar, and that she's chosen this moment as the "right time" for her to stake her claim to you--her new hero--while the tennis team (and the entire student body who was at that match and who also suddenly think that you're THE coolest thing since Boar's Head Tatoos on a fat girl) invites you to their next "hush-hush" beer bash this Friday night down by the old train trestle. And of course the school principal is standing off in the distance begrudgingly smiling and shaking his head as if to say "boys will be boys" ...........UNTIL.........

    ........"Eddie......Eddie, wake up..........time to get up for school......"
     
    #27
  28. drakulie

    drakulie Talk Tennis Guru

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    This is quite common. It is so common you someitmes have 2 high-schools do the same thing, and then the top gun for each school end up playing each other anyways.

    Funny story though. They must of been pissed off!!!
     
    #28
  29. Kaptain Karl

    Kaptain Karl Hall Of Fame

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    ttwarrior1 - Glad you tried your hand at some creative writing. And interesting that your weird dream was the inspiration for it.

    (IOW, I'm assuming you really know such behavior is cheating.)

    - KK
     
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  30. Camilio Pascual

    Camilio Pascual Hall of Fame

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    Guess not.
     
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  31. mikemasonx

    mikemasonx New User

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    hahahahahahaha!
    yeah, this guy really needs to get a life.
     
    #31
  32. Rackethead

    Rackethead Rookie

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    Great story ttwarrior1 :) I'm just amazed that everyone is taking this so seriously instead of laughing at it....I have to admit that the point about them lifting up a 350 lb guy kind of stretches things...but what the heck, literary license.
     
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  33. Thereallovebone

    Thereallovebone Rookie

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    What did the minister say when he got back from his mission about your underhanded bullsh*t ploy?? There is no way that is legal in any league.
     
    #33
  34. ATXtennisaddict

    ATXtennisaddict Hall of Fame

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    Although it seems wrong,I found it amusing.
     
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  35. antontd

    antontd Semi-Pro

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    Where is ttwarrior? I wouldn't be surprised if he has changed his username...
    yeah, I want more! Flame the fat sta/su-cker
     
    #35
  36. Dopke

    Dopke Semi-Pro

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    Stacking is illegal around here (HS level), but not really enforced if its only a slight "stack"

    Basically your best player can play 1 singles or 1 doubles. your 2nd best can play 2 singles or 2 doubles. There are some teams who don't really do this, but no team has ever done what you did- putting your very best 2-3 spots below what they are supposed to play.
     
    #36
  37. ttwarrior1

    ttwarrior1 Professional

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    stacking what stacking. If i think the worst player should be #1 seed then so be it
     
    #37
  38. ttwarrior1

    ttwarrior1 Professional

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    Not much to say really about the meeting at golden corral except all the sad and upset faces of the other teams, especially the parents. We took the last piece of everything so they would have to wait for their food. We just kept telling stories and made sure they could here us. I asked if any on the team wanted a beer and said we would pull up the liquor store on the way back home, and we did.
     
    #38
  39. Thereallovebone

    Thereallovebone Rookie

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    I bet the minister is proud of you. Great job filling in. Jesus is proud.
     
    #39
  40. Brent Pederson

    Brent Pederson Semi-Pro

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    Wow, I believe this may be the greatest posts I have ever read. ttwarrior1, I want to have your baby!
     
    #40
  41. Thereallovebone

    Thereallovebone Rookie

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    At 325 pounds, you better be on top.
     
    #41
  42. FREDDY

    FREDDY Semi-Pro

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    STACKED. pretty great.
     
    #42
  43. matchpoints

    matchpoints Professional

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    Yup, stacking. It only works because in most schools the top 2 players tend to be far better then the rest of the team. This is true in highschools and many d2, d3 and NAIA collegiate teams.....some d1s as well.

    Imagine if everyone stacked?

    Stacking = bad sportmanship

    I would also like to see a 350lb person getting picked up by high school TENNIS players no less....
     
    #43
  44. Geezer Guy

    Geezer Guy Hall of Fame

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    Hwjd


    HWJD --> How Would Jesus Stack?
     
    #44
  45. ferreira

    ferreira Rookie

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    ANY type?
    I suppose you're not including Davis Cup ties in this rationale, are you? Nonetheless, forbidding the practice does seem to be for the best of the development of the sport.
     
    #45
  46. arodnadal

    arodnadal Semi-Pro

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    its a great story but very hard to believe a 300+ lb guy can play tennis
     
    #46
  47. Dedans Penthouse

    Dedans Penthouse Hall of Fame

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    Hmm....a 300+ butterball playing tennis against Andy Roddick?

    A-Rod vs. A slob. ;-)

    Probably plays with a "spaghetti" string job.....and his blood type is "Ragu"
     
    #47
  48. Dedans Penthouse

    Dedans Penthouse Hall of Fame

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    Imagine this 300+ cow playing tennis against Andy Roddick?

    A-Rod vs. A slob.
     
    #48
  49. Thereallovebone

    Thereallovebone Rookie

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    It doesn't matter in Davis Cup because both singles players have to play both other singles players.
     
    #49
  50. ttwarrior1

    ttwarrior1 Professional

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    My first serve is better.
     
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