He quit on match point. Then I find out why

Discussion in 'Adult League & Tournament Talk' started by chatt_town, Oct 27, 2013.

  1. chatt_town

    chatt_town Hall of Fame

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    Okay so let me start this by saying the guy appears to be a good dude. I think though he like a lot of others have a bad view of what rec tennis is about. The back round of the story is this.

    I play the guy two weeks ago. We have a very close match. I beat him in the third set breaker 13-11. He then proceeds to state that he lost because his serve was not where it was suppose to be. I wasn't suppose to get as many balls back(the guy's serve is better than most I've played but I've seen and beaten better serves). At any rate, I ask my captain to play the line 1 singles again next week in hopes of drawing him again. I wanted to see if he was going to serve any better. I did but this time he brings his wife. So the match is moving along...pretty much in the exact same fashion as the previous week. He wins the first set and I win the second. We get to the breaker and he goes up 2-0...I come back and for some reason he loses it at like 6-7 and double faults not once but twice. I'm about to serve 9-6. He says screw it and walks off..he didn't shake hands or anything.

    The funny part is we didn't have one questioned call. He missed 1 badly on my favorite dtlbh. He was looking cross court but I clearly could see it was on the inside part of the line, but I didn't even question the call. He didn't even get upset after I hit another backhand while he was at net directly at him and knocked his glasses off earlier in the match. So I'm trying to figure out what the deal was. I also remember him chewing his wife's @$$ real bad for being on the phone while we were playing. It was so embarrassing to me that I made up an excuse to go to my car while he was doing it.

    After the match, I'm still curious about why he quit but didn't want to directly ask so I walk over to his car to give him the other 2 balls(I was serving when he quit). As I turn to walk away he turned me back around and shook my hand and starting telling me how he was having problems getting his son back. Some guy threw him under the bus with a business they were suppose to be getting into so he hadn't been playing.

    I told him that everyone has problems, but to me Tennis is the one thing where I can go and get some exercise and blow off some steam whether I win or lose. So that's why I rarely question calls even when it's obvious they were in. He gave me card as he blamed his "bad play" on only playing once a week as if anyone else plays and practices 7 days a week.:) He seemed up tight so I'm going to reach out and start playing pick up matches with him. Do you all every run across people like this? What do you all do? Tennis has been great to me and I just don't ever see a need to go off unless you are doing things to me that you shouldn't. I don't go off over missed calls though. That takes too much energy.lol
     
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  2. dlk

    dlk Hall of Fame

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    I like your position on the game...stress/key GAME. Displacement is a b---ch. I wouldn't touch him again, but if you can see through his problems, you sound like a good friend he may need.
    Tennis is a fun GAME to me. I feel sorry for people who believe they're at Wimbledon, they have deeper issues than a poor second serve.
     
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  3. Bdarb

    Bdarb Hall of Fame

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    Sounds like this guy needs a way to get some stress out that's a little more relaxing for him. Personally I find league pretty chill but I see people who get really worked up about it too.

    Nice of you to give him a hand. I bet someone easy going looking to hit some balls in a non league environment would be good for him. Heads up though, sounds like you're gonna be this guys therapist at change overs.
     
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  4. gmatheis

    gmatheis Hall of Fame

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    People are just wired differently.

    I know a guy who is a strong 4.5ish from Jamaica I think. (I think he actually got bumped to 5.0 and stopped playing USTA)

    He is the absolute nicest guy on the court. You can put the worst doubles partner with him and every shot his partner misses will be met with comments like ... good try, keep going for it, you'll get it next time. If his opponents win a point he always compliments the shot.

    The more he has to run to help his partner the happier he is because he is "getting a good sweat"

    I wish I was wired like this guy but I'm not .... different people are just different.
     
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  5. emilyhex

    emilyhex Rookie

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    It sounds like he chokes in pressure situations and has a hard time accepting it. Rather than letting you win flat out (or fighting to the finish and possibly pulling it out), he quits. Maybe this softens the blow to his ego in his mind, I don't know. Not everyone loses gracefully.

    This sounds like a normal human experience to me. You won, move on. He sounds like he has a full plate of his own stuff to deal with.
     
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  6. Bdarb

    Bdarb Hall of Fame

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    I love playing with positive people. So much more fun.
     
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  7. goober

    goober Legend

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    I do run across people like this on occasion. But in general I try to avoid them. If a guy is chewing out his wife and having problems with his son, trying to get involved in anyway is usually not a good thing. Why get drawn into some kind of domestic issues with a stranger? You have no idea of what you are getting into. Personally I only get to play tennis 1-2 times a week, so I don't have time for that kind of drama. I have enough drama already at work and at home. I don't need to add more to it.
     
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  8. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    I think he is using his family excuse to hide his unsportsmanlike behavior. He could play till the last point but not one more because of his son's business worries? I am not buying it.
     
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  9. Sakkijarvi

    Sakkijarvi Semi-Pro

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    Human being sighting. Warning: Human being sighting...
     
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  10. struggle

    struggle Hall of Fame

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    keep playing that guy.
     
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  11. LafayetteHitter

    LafayetteHitter Hall of Fame

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    Next time someone says that tell them this, "You know I am absolutely certain I could beat Roger Federer and also Nadal, even my coach says so, IF my game is where it needs to be.
     
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  12. lstewart

    lstewart Rookie

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    Some players never can accept being beaten, but always have some excuse about their games being off. When I've run into someone like that, I just nod my head, act sympathetic, take the win, and move on. You learn who those guys are, but I more or less ignore them.
     
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  13. Moz

    Moz Hall of Fame

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    There's nothing more unsavoury than a delusional human being. Very little good comes out of any sort of relationship with them - they lack humility, objectivity and perspective.

    The other thing is because of their delusion they will rarely address any of their issues, such as practising more. I think subconsciously they fear their delusion being revealed for what it is.

    If you find a large-breasted model who is deluded and tight with money run a mile.
     
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  14. beernutz

    beernutz Hall of Fame

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    [pulls up chair] That sounds like a very interesting personal anecdote waiting to be told.
     
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  15. sovertennis

    sovertennis Semi-Pro

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    (also pulls up chair) I have no idea what he means, but really want to learn more.
     
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  16. dman72

    dman72 Hall of Fame

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    Yeah, this guy has too many issues, I'd steer clear.
     
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  17. dizzlmcwizzl

    dizzlmcwizzl Hall of Fame

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    First let me say ... you are a much better man than I will ever be.


    -----

    Second I had an almost similar situation but I went the other way. In a nutshell ....

    We split the first two sets and he was hooking me badly in the second set, which I lost. When it came time to either play the third set out, or to play a match tie break I chose to play it out ... even though our team had won the match already. When my captain asked why ... I said loud enough that he could hear that I wanted to make the "fat ba$st0rd suffer". It was a 95 degree day in July.

    Any who, when I was serving at 5-0, 40-0 he walked off the court saying it was to hot and he quit.

    I am not sure who won that exchange, but I am pretty sure this makes you a better man than I ever will be.
     
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  18. KOFS

    KOFS New User

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    You find these guys in every state, city, club, and park. Thier self-worth is tied to their game.
     
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  19. chatt_town

    chatt_town Hall of Fame

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    You know what. Of everything I have read here. I'm going to take your advice because you are right. I have my own problems. I am out there to get away from my own problems.lol I guess it could turn out good but I don't know if I have the time to deal with someone else's issues. I get a good singles match with a guy who he and I play each other every week. We even skipped out on the league we had been playing because we were dealing with too many @holes and paying for it(40 dollars for 7 matches).

    With us we even call our own balls out when the other is across court and can't see it. Don't get it twisted. We both don't like losing but it isn't that serious. We have all kinds of side bets. If one loses 5 straight they have to go and ask this 3.5 guy to play or 7 straight the loser has to take the winner of 7 straight to a buffet...so I get more out of that these days than winning a 4.5 league where I have to possibly cuss some guy out. I just turned 45 and have been playing since I was 34. I won enough tourneys in the first 5 years that if I don't win another I could care less. I play doubles at times with a guy that we don't have a snow balls chance in hell of winning and teams that I've been beating down for years are getting their rocks off but I could care less. The guy is cool to be around and likes playing with me even with my lolly pop serve. I guess he will enjoy it until he gets his jewels knocked off because I'm not going to go hit 500 serves to get it better. It is what it is and I've won with what I have for so long I don't have the desire to get any better. I just want a good sweat.lol


     
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  20. chatt_town

    chatt_town Hall of Fame

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    lol...that is too funny. Another thing is this. The game where he made the really bad call...I never even asked him was he sure. So on the cross over, one of my teammates tell me that we had already won the match(basically telling me I could let it go if I wanted). anyway... the guy is paranoid...and says "look guys...I'm going to say this out loud...if I miss a call you can tell me and we'll play two" He thought my teammate was telling me he had hooked me on the dtlbh I hit...which he wasn't saying anything about that, but that made me think he felt guilty about the call.

    While I never meant to hit him with the backhand that did hit him. I did mean to hand cuff him because he f'cked me on the last down the line backhand and this was 4-4 and he was serving 30-40 so I wasn't taking a chance of him missing another call so I hit it right at him. He was looking for it up the line and it caught him right between the eyes.


     
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  21. chatt_town

    chatt_town Hall of Fame

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    You are right and that is what I did after the first match.lol

     
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  22. Gonzalito17

    Gonzalito17 Hall of Fame

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    "Self worth is tied to their game..."

    Isn't every serious competitor's, to varying degrees? Everybody practices and trains and seeks coaching to better their game so they can be the winner. Losing sucks.
     
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  23. MauricioDias

    MauricioDias Rookie

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    Considering that I play for fun, If someone has this behaviour in court, even thinking its caused by personal problems, Ill try to avoid playing with him again.
     
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  24. West Coast Ace

    West Coast Ace G.O.A.T.

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    Well played.

    If you say so - all evidence points otherwise. Excuses and $0.50 will get you a bad cup of coffee - or so the saying goes; not my drink of choice. I could see you offering to play him 'once he gets his situation settled'. But as others pointed out you're being too charitable; pulling the rip cord at match point is pathetic - you're enabling his bad behavior - all that off the court stuff was irrelevant to what was happening on court - you turned the match around and were poised to win; he still had an opportunity but took the coward's way out.
     
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  25. TTMR

    TTMR Hall of Fame

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    I appreciate your kindness, and your returning my balls. I know leaving on match point is considered bad form in rec tennis but I did it only because I didn't want you to feel like you didn't win the match legitimately. If you understood how much my ex has been on my case, and how much my business partner screwed me over, you wouldn't be at your best either. It might be a while, but when I get back to my usual superlative game, I'll give you a call.

    All the best.
     
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  26. brokenRPM

    brokenRPM Rookie

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    we will be there soon after marijuana is legalized.
     
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