I need some trash talk ideas

Discussion in 'Tennis Tips/Instruction' started by freelans, May 20, 2006.

  1. freelans

    freelans Rookie

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    This is a little tongue in cheek of course but there are times when I could a bit of an edge and I think a little trash talk helps ease the tension on the courts during a friendly game.

    So what is some of the trash you guys like to throw out there? :)
     
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  2. Rickson

    Rickson G.O.A.T.

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    You want trash talk? First of all, your dumb ass posted this thread in the wrong section, you moron. Secondly, if you can't figure out how to trash talk someone on your own, you'd get eaten up anyway. You're so weak, you couldn't punch your way out of a wet, paper bag. You think your ball hit the line? Your vision is so bad, Maria Sharapova makes more accurate calls than you do. You call that a serve? I've seen better serves from grandmas who just started playing at the nursing home.

    Good luck!
     
    #2
  3. freelans

    freelans Rookie

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    You da man Rickson. :)
     
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  4. Bungalo Bill

    Bungalo Bill G.O.A.T.

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    I dont think you can handle trash talk you sissy foreigner. You have no game, no style, and you look like a complete dork on the court. Why do you still play? Why do you still insist you can hit a ball?

    Your forehand is so easy to hit back, I am going to destroy it. Every chance I get, I gonna take my knife and ram it into your heart. You never learned how to play this game and you're overrated!!! :p
     
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  5. Andres

    Andres G.O.A.T.

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    Your mama.

    Yeah your mama.

    No, your mama.

    Works every time :mrgreen:
     
    #5
  6. 35ft6

    35ft6 Legend

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    "You can open your eyes now." "I had sex with your wife." "Yo mama is so stupid it takes her half an hour to make Minute Rice."
     
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  7. Andres

    Andres G.O.A.T.

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    You see? This is how an OLD player trash-talks
    OLD players uses words like "overrated", "foreigner" and "dork" :mrgreen:

    We youngsters use words a "beotch", "fo' shizzle ma' nizzle", and stuff like that :mrgreen:

    Sorry to bring you down, bungallo, but in the trash talking thread, it was the right thing to do!!! :mrgreen:
     
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  8. Bungalo Bill

    Bungalo Bill G.O.A.T.

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    What, are you on crack? Who the hell are you? I think you're full of it Andres. Where did you learn to play? Can you even spell the word tennis, you snivelling little baby? You're overrated man! :p

    you little (bleeep) and (bleeep), you look like (bleeep), and you dress like a (bleeep) (bleeep), lol
     
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  9. Andres

    Andres G.O.A.T.

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    Your mama :mrgreen:

    - Andrés.
     
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  10. Bungalo Bill

    Bungalo Bill G.O.A.T.

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    LOL :eek:
     
    #10
  11. Return_Ace

    Return_Ace Professional

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    lol, that reminded me of people playing cs:s :/

    i mean, when someone goes "ha, fo sh0 i'm goona bust a cap in y0 @ss bi-atch" how the hell do you take them seriously?
     
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  12. DX_Psycho

    DX_Psycho Semi-Pro

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    do you like the internet? cause you sure like hititng into the net.

    MADE THAT ONE UP MYSELF BABY.
     
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  13. Bungalo Bill

    Bungalo Bill G.O.A.T.

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    You just look at them and then bust out laughing while walking away.
     
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  14. Hey Freelans, you picked up tennis because you were to short to play basketball, right? Maybe you should have stuck with basketball!

    I think I am going to play lefthanded and full court just to make it interesting. Don't worry though I won't change, sissy boy! By the way is that a Walmart raquet? I hear they are really affordable these days.

    Maybe we should put some money on this as I need some motivation. Or you can just pay me up front and we'll call it a lesson! Brother where did you get those shoes?

    You should probably leave the tennis forum now and go study for school! Come back when you're :cool:.



    (just kidding of course)
     
    #14
  15. MTChong

    MTChong Professional

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    You're pathetic.
     
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  16. metsjets

    metsjets Rookie

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    haha you're gay :)
     
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  17. jimiforpres

    jimiforpres Rookie

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    If you really want mess someone up, don't be too obvious about anything. If you come out on the court and start shooting off your mouth, then the guy will never take you seriously. Say something like,"My return is pretty bad today, normally I crush dinky serves". They may not become really mad, but they will try to prove you wrong by ripping their serves, causing them to double fault, which usually leads to the collapse of the rest of their game.
     
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  18. Roddick The Beast

    Roddick The Beast Banned

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    *yawns* I should have brought the morning papers with me and a pot of coffee.
     
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  19. Andres

    Andres G.O.A.T.

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    You see? It works any time, and at any level :mrgreen:
    You should try it ;)
     
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  20. Rep. Timothy Calhoun

    Rep. Timothy Calhoun Banned

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    "I thought warm-ups were over???"
     
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  21. Roforot

    Roforot Professional

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    Your momma's so fat, when she wear a green dress white her white purse, kids try to hit serves into her neck fold.

    Your momma's so cheap, she couldn't buy you nothing but that *****y (insert frame)

    Your momma's so nasty, Phillopousis wouldn't hit it.

    (when there's a let cord), say "Did your momma fall down?"


    :)
     
    #21
  22. Bungalo Bill

    Bungalo Bill G.O.A.T.

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    You talking to my teammate? :)
     
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  23. ShooterMcMarco

    ShooterMcMarco Hall of Fame

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    Roforot, your momma is so ugly, Federer would rather f#@! his cow than her.
     
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  24. Rickson

    Rickson G.O.A.T.

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    You now hold the title for the worst "your momma" joke ever.
     
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  25. Mr.Federer

    Mr.Federer Hall of Fame

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    When you win a point say: "sooo easy".
     
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  26. Roddick The Beast

    Roddick The Beast Banned

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    Ok, your's is the best. LMAO, "it's so easy", c'mon! :rolleyes: "It's so easy." C'mon ^_^ LMAO, "it's so easy", c'mon! :rolleyes: "It's so easy." C'mon ^_^ LMAO, "it's so easy", c'mon! :rolleyes: "It's so easy." C'mon ^_^
     
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  27. Jon Hampton

    Jon Hampton Rookie

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    I honestly start calling out my shots before I hit them, just because I want my friend to think I'm so cocky about my shots that I even if he knows what's coming, I'll still hit a winner on him anyway.
     
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  28. DRtenniS1112

    DRtenniS1112 Semi-Pro

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    I am a frequent user of how do u like these lines...

    They respond in whatever way

    You say oh i cuz i just painted em
     
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  29. Roddick The Beast

    Roddick The Beast Banned

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    That can be seen as rude. You shouts (or speech) could starlte the opponent, causing them to lose focus, be it 1 millisecond etc., it still may potentially cause them to lose focus. There's a rule against that too.
     
    #29
  30. Kabob190

    Kabob190 Rookie

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    as your walking on the court say "just remember the ball is the yellow thing"

    my friend always said this to me when i was first starting out. It was actually more annoying than funny.
     
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  31. Ammo

    Ammo Rookie

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    ur mom is like a shotgun, two cocks and she's ready to blow!
    ur mom is like a Christmas tree, everyone puts their balls on her!
    ur mom is like a light switch, even a four year old can turn her on!
    ur mom is so fat, when she fel in love she broke it!
    ur mom is so stupid, she stood on a chair to raise her IQ!

    -peace:mrgreen:
     
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  32. Kabob190

    Kabob190 Rookie

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    close your mouth when you're talkin to me
     
    #32
  33. Roddick The Beast

    Roddick The Beast Banned

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    Talk to the hand! (corny!) Haha
     
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  34. Roforot

    Roforot Professional

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    Your momma jokes are better than mine (though I tried to tie mine to tennis); you must have had more practice than I :)
     
    #34
  35. Roddick The Beast

    Roddick The Beast Banned

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    Naw, it's called "Google". Originality no longer exists. Didn't you know that? :mrgreen:
     
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  36. Freedom

    Freedom Professional

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    Lol I call my shots too. Not in official matches, of course. But I always tell my friend when I am about to pass him. He gets pissed when the ball goes past right like I said it would too. :cool:

    Just say "Your mom" after everything. Everything. Even when you aren't playing tennis.
     
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  37. Jon Hampton

    Jon Hampton Rookie

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    Beast, we're talking about a friendly match here, not a professional tournament. Talking during points during a friendly match is perfectly acceptable if both people think it's okay.

    Now, word to your mother.
     
    #37
  38. Andres

    Andres G.O.A.T.

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    Just tell him you slept with his wife, that would kill him...

    You: - Oh yeah? And I just SLEPT WITH YOUR WIFE!!!
    Him: - :shock:
    Other guy: - His wife is in a coma...
     
    #38
  39. katastrof

    katastrof Rookie

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    Seinfeld freak, Andres?
     
    #39
  40. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    I came here to play tennis with you, not badminton.
     
    #40
  41. Andres

    Andres G.O.A.T.

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    Naturally ;)
     
    #41
  42. kevhen

    kevhen Hall of Fame

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    No need to use words to make them feel like crap. Just smile like Hingis after you win a point, or just play them left-handed if they can't handle your regular game.

    Tell them they can take 3 serves if you want to really demean them. Make sure you know you can beat them easily before trashtalking or you look pretty stupid and pathetic though.
     
    #42
  43. mucat

    mucat Hall of Fame

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    the jerk store called, they're running out of you

    Oh well...
     
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  44. Roddick The Beast

    Roddick The Beast Banned

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    OO
     
    #44
  45. Roddick The Beast

    Roddick The Beast Banned

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    Okay, that's the best advice so far.
     
    #45
  46. jamumafa

    jamumafa Semi-Pro

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    Yo momma so old - she owes Jesus 50 pence.

    Yo momma so fat and slow - she got run over by a parked car

    Yo momma so fat - she sat on a rainbow and Skittles popped out
     
    #46
  47. DrewRafter8

    DrewRafter8 Professional

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    "A blind squirrel finds an acorn every once in a while"

    You guys KNOW what type of shots that quote refers to.
     
    #47
  48. MegacedU

    MegacedU Professional

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    This doesn't really apply to me, but I have several male friends that say to each other:

    That's what she said.
     
    #48
  49. Kabob190

    Kabob190 Rookie

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    comebacks like these and yo momma get really really old when you are coming up with original jokes and the other guy just says thats what she said. or yo momma.
     
    #49
  50. brucie

    brucie Professional

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    If they fluke a shot or miss hit one for a winner give them over praise until they feel stupid, if you do it just remind them how bad the shot they just lost to was this really gets em wound up!
     
    #50

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