If you were Santa, what would you give some players?

Discussion in 'General Pro Player Discussion' started by nikdom, Dec 24, 2011.

  1. nikdom

    nikdom Hall of Fame

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    To Novak I would give a French Open, completing his career grand slam with a win over Nadal.

    To Roger, I would give another Wimbledon and a few weeks at No.1 to beat Sampras' total of 286 weeks at the top.

    To Nadal, another Olympic gold (since he loves his country so much) and retirement (since he hates uncle Tio). Happy times fishing and being married to Xisca.

    To Murray, his first major at the USO, the one he loves most.

    To Tsonga, his first major at the AO.



    What about you?
     
    #1
  2. beast of mallorca

    beast of mallorca Legend

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    I will give Nadal a Golden Calendar Year Grand Slam...nuff said :)
     
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  3. nikdom

    nikdom Hall of Fame

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    You must really hate Nadal. The thing he loves most is fishing and hanging out in Mallorca. He hates the ATP calendar, its long grueling season and you want to give him a cygs? :)
     
    #3
  4. niff

    niff Legend

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    - Stockholm title for Jarkko, Munich title for Flo Mayer.
    - Hair growth shampoo for Rafa.
    - Golden ticket to the top 10 for Dolgo.
    - Cvac egg for Roger.
     
    #4
  5. nikdom

    nikdom Hall of Fame

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    You really care about the little guy!
     
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  6. Sentinel

    Sentinel Talk Tennis Guru

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    I'd send a truckload of gluten for Nole.

    That way Rafa can win the CYGS.

    Oh yeah, vamossss !
     
    #6
  7. nikdom

    nikdom Hall of Fame

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    Where suresh comes from, they call it 'Career Yending Grand Slam'
     
    #7
  8. niff

    niff Legend

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    FINE, Roger can have Wimbo.
     
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  9. nikdom

    nikdom Hall of Fame

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    Hehehehe... :)
     
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  10. tusharlovesrafa

    tusharlovesrafa Hall of Fame

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    I will give fed hanky or a big towel to wipe his tears.
    I will give novak a house in serbia so that he can shift his base from monte carlo
    I will personally pick rafa's butt everytime..
     
    Last edited: Dec 24, 2011
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  11. Homeboy Hotel

    Homeboy Hotel Hall of Fame

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    OP, that is just being way too generous.

    I like this thread, but if I was Santa I'd be a cut-back Santa to 'help' them achieve their goals, not just give them it.

    So for me,

    Nadal = A serve and a backhand like Murray's
    Djokovic = Some stylish clothing in the form of a lifetime Adidas contract
    Federer and Murray = Some mental strength 'a pair of balls' (and for Murray, a second serve at 100mph)
     
    #11
  12. Tammo

    Tammo Banned

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    To Murray, a FH
    To Fed, 3 pounds of Lindt chocolate
    To Nadal, itch cream...
     
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  13. Standstill

    Standstill Rookie

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    To Murray, the capacity to always think positively.
     
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  14. boredone3456

    boredone3456 Hall of Fame

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    To Murray I'd give Wimbledon. Take the pressure off of him there that is only going to get worse every year like it seemed to for Henman. This way he can get the monkey off his back, and become god for a year like Nadal than Novak did and be anointed the new GOAT....until someone else remotely similar comes along.

    To Fed, I'd probably give him the Olympic Gold...not because I particularly want him to have it more then anyone else, but it would stop his fans harping about it.

    To Sharapova, I'd give her a new shoulder so if I am going to have to watch her, I won't have to watch her become the new Dementieva serve wise with endless double faults. I'd also take away her voice, which would be a gift to myself and everyone else.

    To Novak I'd give the French, just so it can be said he won all 4 like Nadal and Fed. I'd let him beat Fed in the final, giving the Fed fans something new to complain about to replace their woes about him not having Olympic gold.

    To Wozniacki, I'd give well...I really can't think of anything to give her that would help her at this point...even if I gave her something she probably wouldn't know how to open it or use it...and she'd still find a way to mess it up.

    And hopefully...to this forum, I give this list in hopes of a chuckle or two...if not...something else to generate replies about how wrong and unjust it is...although it is meant partially in jest.
     
    #14
  15. CCNM

    CCNM Hall of Fame

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    Wozniacki-a Grand Slam title, so some folks can stop saying she's not worthy of the number one ranking.
    Federer-some Wimbledon trophy-shaped rattles for his daughters.
    Nadal-some underwear that actually fit him.
    Murray-a Wimbledon title and a razor (he's got the ugliest beard I've ever seen)
    Djokovic, Tsonga, and Monfils-the starring roles in the next "Three Stooges" movie.
     
    Last edited: Dec 24, 2011
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  16. aphex

    aphex Banned

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    Wouldn't that mean,technically, that you would be scratching your head?
     
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  17. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    Yenna da.........
     
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  18. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    I would give Nadal and Djokovic injuries, so that Fed can win the Olympics Gold and get even with Nadal.
     
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  19. GOAT BAAH!!!

    GOAT BAAH!!! Professional

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    I would give Federer some natural talent and ability...

    It's a shame that he had to grind, destroy his body and use gamesmanship to win his major titles to only be interim GOAT.
     
    #19
  20. kishnabe

    kishnabe G.O.A.T.

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    :shock:....Enna Venum!

    I would give Federer a FO beatin Nadal in 5 sets, Wimbledon beating Nadal, and Olympic Gold beating Nadal again.

    Also give Murray a AO.

    Give Djokovic a US open and give Nadal the WTF.
     
    Last edited: Dec 24, 2011
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  21. Rock Strongo

    Rock Strongo Legend

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    I'd give Roddick and Lendl a Wimbledon title, and perhaps Rosewall too.
     
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  22. ben123

    ben123 Professional

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    sharapova gets a muzzle
     
    #22
  23. sportsfan1

    sportsfan1 Hall of Fame

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    Shriekapova - agree, muzzled.
    Julia Gorgeous - Slam wins
    Federer - Aces and return winners on match points.
    Nadal - a win- any one, any where over Noel :)
    Djoker - A thank you note for the imitations. Better volleys. Some class for his player box. More victories for his sidekick Tipsy so that we hopefully don't have to see the nauseating level of Noel-worship out there.
     
    #23
  24. ben123

    ben123 Professional

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    ye he will win vs him in some exo. then he will get destroyed in ao 606060
     
    #24
  25. nikdom

    nikdom Hall of Fame

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    Ha ha ha... I'm told the right response is Yenna maccha.
     
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  26. Hood_Man

    Hood_Man Legend

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    To Roger I would give a US Open, winning the final in a 5th set tiebreaker (actually, every match will go to a fifth set tiebreak, Warrior Fed!), and because he's my favourite player I'll also give him the Olympic Gold medal in singles.

    To Djokovic I would give a French Open so he can have all four.

    To Murray I would give the Australian Open, beating Nadal in the semi final and Djokovic in the final. Both in 5 sets. Murray winning his first major will be special enough to begin with, but being pushed to the edge and winning it in such tight circumstances will make it all the more special.

    To Nadal I would give Wimbledon as it's the most prestigious tournament in the world, but it's also the major where he is arguably most loved and would mean far more to him I think than even a record breaking 7th French Open.

    I'd give Del Potro a Davis Cup victory, winning it for Argentina in a 5th set in a 5th deciding rubber.

    I'd give Mardy Fish a masters win.

    In 2013...

    I'd give Roddick Wimbledon, I'd give Nalbandian a US Open, Federer a French Open (FINALLY beating Nadal in the final), and Tsonga an Australian Open. Then I'd give Nadal a Davis Cup victory, winning it in the same circumstances as Del Potro in 2012. And Murray would get the WTF.
     
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  27. Rock Strongo

    Rock Strongo Legend

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    Ooh!!! I'd give Wozniacki and Murray their first slams!
     
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  28. westside

    westside Hall of Fame

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    This, but rather Hewitt winning it for Australia (can be traded in for gold medal at London)

    US Open for Nalbandian.

    A semi or final appearance in a slam final for Blake.

    Another Wimbledon title for Fed.
     
    #28
  29. TopFH

    TopFH Hall of Fame

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    To Nadal a retirement (just kidding).
    To Fed a RG win over Ralph.
    To Murray a slam.
    To Djoker nothing. He's been naughty with his retirements.
     
    #29
  30. Homeboy Hotel

    Homeboy Hotel Hall of Fame

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    I rate this post highly.
     
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  31. abeldm

    abeldm New User

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    I agree.. Andy really deserves a Wimbledon... Murray for sure is ready for a slam.
     
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  32. djones

    djones Hall of Fame

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    I'd give Federer a pair of Ballerinas.
     
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  33. RoddickistheMan

    RoddickistheMan Professional

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    Roddick: His forehand from 2003-2004
    Nadal: Underwear that doesn't give him wedges
    Federer:5 years of youth back
    Djokovic:Coal
    Ferrer: 5 inches of height
    Monfils: Consistency
     
    #33
  34. Sentinel

    Sentinel Talk Tennis Guru

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    You too, Kish !! :shock::shock::shock::shock:
     
    #34
  35. TennisLovaLova

    TennisLovaLova Hall of Fame

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    To roger: make ******** disappear for good
     
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  36. tusharlovesrafa

    tusharlovesrafa Hall of Fame

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    I don't know but it sounds Tamil to me.I have been to chennai(madras at that time)twice.Only things I remember of my trip to chennai is of eating Cup Noodles and going to sea shore.
     
    #36
  37. fps

    fps Legend

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    I'd give Andy Murray Gears of War 3, I think he'd like that.
     
    #37
  38. ark_28

    ark_28 Hall of Fame

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    I would give Wimbledon to Roddick,

    and 6 more Grand Slams to Pete so that he would still be the most prolific Grand Slam winner of all time.
     
    #38
  39. celoft

    celoft Guest

    This one is good.
     
    #39
  40. The Baseline

    The Baseline Professional

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    Id give Gonzalez a backhand and he would have never been out of the top 5 in his career.
     
    #40
  41. Tmano

    Tmano Professional

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    To Nadal a slightly different racquet, maybe a 98 a bit heavier, and some DHBH lesson by a new coach!
    To Federer a super light pair of shoes so for the coming year doesn't get tired
    To Nole a bit of humility
    To Murray a year long lasting shot of confidence
    To Del Portro I would cancel from his mind the wrist injury he had
    To Tsonga a big win in one of the slams
    To Ferrer another great year of tennis at high level
     
    #41
  42. kishnabe

    kishnabe G.O.A.T.

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    #42
  43. SoBad

    SoBad Legend

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    Nadal - Gold Slam 2012 Medal
    Djokovic - a nice hanging plant
    Safin - government badge
    Fereder - happy retirement card and ball hopper for FL coaching
    Roddick and Blake - happy retirement cards and collection of Fereder photos for their private moments
    Dimitrov - a magical inspirational gift and a card
    Korolev - a magical inspirational gift and a card
    Donskoy - a magical inspirational gift and a card
    Nishikori - - a magical inspirational gift, a card, and a wristwatch
     
    #43
  44. adamX012

    adamX012 Rookie

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    Safin - government badge? He has already got the one. Another gift.
     
    #44
  45. Ronaldo

    Ronaldo G.O.A.T.

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    A heart like Ferrer's.
     
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  46. Sentinel

    Sentinel Talk Tennis Guru

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    I'd give Nadal a gf like Brooklyn Decker so she can distract him from tennis.

    I'd slip Viagra into Nole's breakfast every morning, so he can't practice.


    Going to Chennai and eating cup noodles. Such heresy !

    I usually only transit Chennai on way to my hometown.
     
    #46
  47. West Coast Ace

    West Coast Ace G.O.A.T.

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    Better throw in a 2nd serve.

    To Nadal: a poster of the male anatomy - so he can pick new parts to use for MTOs.
    To Ferrer: nicotine patches.
    To Cibulkova: my phone number.
     
    #47
  48. valiant

    valiant Hall of Fame

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    Aussie open for Tsonga
    Wimby for Feddy boy
     
    #48
  49. MariaRafael

    MariaRafael Banned

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    What do you mean by "hanging plant"? A plant for ***** to hang himself?
     
    #49
  50. MariaRafael

    MariaRafael Banned

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    Federer - twin boys to make his family complete
    Nadal - immunotherapy to stop having viral infections one after another
    Ferrer - another 5 years of his career
    Feliciano Lopez and other Spanish models - lead role in a long multiserial to keep them busy for another 20 years
    Cvac and his girlfriend - lead roles in the remake of "Drakula looking for Drakulina"
     
    #50

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