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Discussion in 'Odds & Ends' started by Rickson, Jun 21, 2004.

  1. Rickson

    Rickson G.O.A.T.

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    post your tennis results here.

    singles

    sunday- won 6-0, 6-0
    monday- won 6-0, 6-0, 6-0, 6-0(2 different players)

    doubles

    sunday- lost 6-1, 3-6, 5-7
    monday- won 7-6, 6-4
     
    #1
  2. Deuce

    Deuce Banned

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    A not so parallel universe...
    Why don't you get right to the point and post an ad looking for singles players your level?
     
    #2
  3. Rickson

    Rickson G.O.A.T.

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    OK OK, so my partners are a liability to me.
     
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  4. Phil

    Phil Hall of Fame

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    Sounds like you've got some really serious singles competition there...Your singles matches should have an asterisk:

    *Sunday, opponent was myself, and I beat myself handily as score indicates. Monday, first player is a 95-year old one-legged blind grandmother, second player 18-month old toddler.
     
    #4
  5. Rickson

    Rickson G.O.A.T.

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    How about this for specific, Phil?

    Sunday- some trash talker named Lou who loves to slice and use drop shots.

    Monday- beginner named Jamal, a good kid who's still learning.
    Monday- intermediate named Andy who took some time off from the game.

    Yes, the victories on Jamal and Andy were pretty lame, but the win against Lou was a legitimate one.
     
    #5
  6. Phil

    Phil Hall of Fame

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    So, Rickson, your real name is Lou and you were talking trash to yourself and played with yourself, and the next day managed to bagel Jamal (the 18-month old) and Andy (actually short for Andrea, the 95-year old grandma). Exactly what I said before, right.
     
    #6
  7. Rickson

    Rickson G.O.A.T.

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    Are you Lou, posting here as Phil?
     
    #7
  8. Senator Jay Bullworth

    Senator Jay Bullworth New User

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    So Rickson wuz fixin'
    to beat trash-talkin', fast talkin' Lou
    Lou might've been nuts, but wuz really just a klutz
    who had to write "L" and "R" on the bottom of his shoes.
    But Phil like Johnny Cash did some math
    And exposed Rickson as "A Boy Named Lou"

    Ah ha!.... So you meet yourself, then go beat yourself
    By the tune of six-love; six-love
    I too, beat myself, but I did it with stealth
    'Twasn't bagels times two......but it wuz love.

    Now Jamal and Andy sound about as dandy
    As Rosie O'Donnell's no-pest-strip, grotesque'd fanny
    Or as handy as boobs on a bull
    Unlike chop-slicin' Lou, these two hadn't a clue
    So those "bagels" were a sham, like the song "Mandy"

    Beyond your singles glory
    The duh-duh-doubles tells the reeaal story
    Like lard-butt Rosie with a fart in her
    You stink, then claim it's your partner

    My draw in doubles? Hell, I stacked it
    I beat the "top seeds" Layback and Wackit
    Bageling 2.5's in tennis is really ephemeral
    Take this tip instead: "shake hands with the 'General'"

    With love in my heart and lust in my loins, I am,

    Idiomatically (if not gramatically) yours,
    Senator Jay Bullworth
     
    #8
  9. Rickson

    Rickson G.O.A.T.

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    Played an imtermediate named Raul on Tuesday 6/29. Beat him 6-2, 6-1, 6-4.
     
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