Spoiler etiquette

Discussion in 'Odds & Ends' started by Cindysphinx, Nov 28, 2011.

  1. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    Oh, dear. It happened again.

    I could not watch Tsonga/Federer, which aired at 12:30 pm, so I recorded the match. I had a dinner with tennis teammates at 6 pm. I was looking forward to curling up in bed and watching the match when I got home.

    But I knew -- just knew! -- that there was no way I would make it out of that dinner without someone announcing the match results. Sure enough, just before the check came, someone spilled the beans. No warning, no nothing. Just *bam.* The scores, the winner, everything.

    I just don't get this. Video recording has existed since the 1980s. Yet people still blab match or game results without thinking that perhaps not everyone wants to hear it. If I respond with, "Oh, dear. I had taped the match; I was going to watch it later," then I'm the buzz kill.

    Then on the other end of the spectrum is my friend who records every match at a major and then insists that no one discuss it, even if the match occurred a full week ago. You can't say you are hoping Nadal will beat Soderling tomorrow because you are then revealing that they won their first round matches.

    We need a rule here, people. 'Cause right now we have anarchy.

    I propose that, henceforth, folks are not permitted to talk about a sporting event result until a full 24 hours have passed unless a proper warning is given: "Hey, did everyone see the Federer/Tsonga match?" This will give folks like me a reasonable opportunity to stick our fingers in our ears.

    Cindy -- frequently amazed that people think nothing of giving away endings to books or movies
     
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  2. ollinger

    ollinger Legend

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    Sports fans discuss sports. It's really quite simple. It's the news of the day for them, and people don't think "I'd better wait a day or two before discussing the news." Jets pulled out a late win yesterday against the Bills, I get to work this morning and I say "how 'bout those Jets!" Expecting the burden to be on others to first find out whether someone doesn't want to discuss something is expecting a little too much vigilance by others. Conversation doesn't revolve around your particular needs. If you want to say "please don't tell me who won the Jets-Bills game, I haven't watched it yet" you certainly can do that.
     
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  3. Nuke

    Nuke Hall of Fame

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    Gotta agree with ollinger on this one. It's a bit self-centered to think, "You can't discuss current events because I haven't watched it yet." This isn't really the same as giving away the ending to a current movie.
     
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  4. El Diablo

    El Diablo Hall of Fame

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    I've arrived at a court plenty of times and a friend will say "don't tell me who won such-and-such match, I'm watching it later." I don't think they expect me to ask them first if they've seen it yet.
     
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  5. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    Ugh.

    It feels very unfriendly and presumptuous to announce your needs to everyone at the event, "Don't talk about X." Sounds very controlling to me.

    It feels more considerate to preface your spoiler before you drop the bomb. If you are dying to discuss the Jets, how hard is it to say, "Hey, did everyone catch the game yet?" That gives those who don't want to discuss it time to leave or object or whatever.

    Cindy -- who thought she was safe in church a few years back but had someone blurt out Wimbledon results to her anyway
     
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  6. jmverdugo

    jmverdugo Hall of Fame

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    I am going to go with the free speech rule, if you do not want to hear what I am going to say stay away from my perimeter :), what I mean is that if you do not want to hear about the match do not go close to a tennis related place! I think it is a little unfair to want to put a social gag on the rest of the world to prevent them to talk about something that was broadcast all around the world. Books and movies are definitely a different story though...

    In any case I would still watch a match or see a movie even after I know the outcome, like everything in life, it is not about the end of the road, it is about the ride (... yes I like cliches ;))
     
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  7. rommil

    rommil Legend

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    The perpetual needy drama of Cindy. Try going to dinner with deaf and mute tennis players, this might save you from your problems.
     
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  8. El Diablo

    El Diablo Hall of Fame

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    ^^ he's got a point. We could go all the way back to the post about when you decided not to use a pediatrician any longer because the guy yawned while he was with your kid. It was all about you, rather than that the guy was just tired. The world doesn't revolve around you, and the conversation doesn't revolve around whether you've seen a match yet.
     
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  9. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    What I want to know is whether you have stopped blasting huge yawns into your patients' faces while they are giving you their medical history. Very unprofessional, El Diablo. Very unprofessional.
     
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  10. hollywood9826

    hollywood9826 Semi-Pro

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    Either dont go to dinner or let them know you havent seen it yet.
     
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  11. rommil

    rommil Legend

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    Then she won't have anything "dramatic" to write about.
     
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  12. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    I was playing social doubles during the USO Fed-Djoker match. The score updates and final results were whispered to those who indicated that they were interested. But the groans heard when the final results were heard gave everything away as it was by and large a pro-Federer crowd.
     
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  13. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    I would be uncomfortable about any professional who yawned on his job in public, even if it was a clerk at Target.

    It shows he/she is either overworked//bored/does not get enough sleep - all negative signs.

    How would the crowd react if Djokovic began the Wimbledon final with a yawn?
     
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  14. El Diablo

    El Diablo Hall of Fame

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    ^^ Neither you nor Cindy understand yawning; look up a brief review about 10years ago in Scientific American. Yawning is not necessarily related to either fatigue or boredom, but also occurs when we are well rested after waking, and often by suggestion when we see someone else yawn. It actually occurs sometimes as an alerting response and can thus mean quite the opposite of fatigue or boredom. So, the answer to your question is that I wouldn't be bothered if a professional yawned.
     
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  15. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    If I had a choice, I would bother. If I was to be operated upon by the best surgeon in the world, I may not care if he yawns. I would not make that my deciding point of course.

    Actually, I would be more concerned if I saw truck drivers yawn.
     
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  16. chollyred

    chollyred Rookie

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    If not sports, what else do people talk about at church?!

    We are sports fans! Fan - short for fanatic. We gravitate toward each other because of our mutual love of the same sport. If you don't want to talk about tennis, then go to dinner with soccer fans!
     
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  17. djNEiGht

    djNEiGht Professional

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    if it's an event (or even a tv show) that i've missed i try and avoid any sports shows, commercials, apps that give updates, and certain threads.

    a few years ago my Pop commented about one of the stages in the Tour de France. He gave it away and I asked him why he told me as he knew I hadn't watched it yet...

    I know he means well...he does this with other things too and i'll live with it.

    my wife does it too and i think it's because she is the type of person who doesn't care about the spoiler ending.

    my mom records basketball games when she's not home and will sometimes ask if she should watch it or not. that translates to if her team won or lost...

    for me, I'll ask if someone had seen the event or if they care to know the outcome.
     
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  18. AtomicForehand

    AtomicForehand Hall of Fame

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    I would actually come into the group and say right off, with a big smile, "OK, no one tell me how Fed-Tsonga turned out--I'm watching it as soon as I get home!"

    I think most people would be completely cool with that. If the talk even started to turn toward one of the players, or the event, I might even stick my fingers in my ears and (charmingly?) sing "La la la!"...

    It's worth a try...
     
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  19. AtomicForehand

    AtomicForehand Hall of Fame

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    Incidentally, I was going to watch the match at 6 PM last night when Tennis Channel was re-broadcasting it...but a friend spoiled the result for me before that...and oddly, now I don't even really feel like watching the match at all. It really did kind of take all the fun out of it. I'm not angry at my friend--just surprised that it killed my interest in watching.
     
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  20. Sentinel

    Sentinel Bionic Poster

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    What a funny society this must be !!!

    I cant imagine the same situation here. Cricket match going on. The whole nation abuzz with the score. One lone person has it taped and is telling everyone else not to talk about it.

    Yes, Cindy, my good friend, you can enjoy a match even if you know the score, if you keep this "spoiler concept" out of your mind. Don't believe it. It seems like some American concept in the sporting concept.

    I often watch the replay of a match, the next day, after having watched it live. This way i enjoy it even more, since I am not nervous.

    btw, I just watched the semifinal replay.
     
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  21. rommil

    rommil Legend

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    I watched the finals yesterday but don't tell me who won in the semifinals, I haven't watched it yet.
     
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  22. r2473

    r2473 Legend

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    Everyone knows that I watch sports on delay so nobody discusses tennis results without first asking me if I've seen a particular match yet. Fortunately, not too many people watch tennis anyway.

    The only other time it really comes up is for the finals of Wimbledon and The French. I'll usually play at 8am. If people come to the court next to me, I'll actually tell them not to say the score out loud if they can help it as we haven't seen the match yet. Of course I can tell the match must have been a really snoozer if people are showing up at 10am.

    Other than that, nobody (not even other tennis players) are usually watching UMAG, so nobody spills the beans about those results anyway.

    Ironically, I have not watched or seen the result of the Fed / Tsonga match. I skipped over Cindy's first post. I'm going to watch it tonight. I just got an e-mail from a friend and the first thing she asked is if I had seen the match and if it is OK to talk about it. Nice person.
     
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  23. Fifth Set

    Fifth Set Professional

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    Cindy, I think the more interesting question is how can you watch a recorded match and feel any suspense at all? The thing is over. Decided. Done.

    Live events are exciting not just because YOU are in some artificial cocoon of silence, but because nobody really knows how it will turn out.

    Sorry, I can't really relate to your concern.
     
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  24. Fugazi

    Fugazi Professional

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    If you didn't warn your friends, it was bound to happen...
     
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  25. Fugazi

    Fugazi Professional

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    It's not controlling. If anyone doesn't like it, they clearly lack empathy.
     
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  26. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    Yeah lots of people actually play tennis here rather than watching. That was precisely what was going on that day. The match was being shown in the pro office, but we were outside on the courts. Given a choice between playing and watching, I would play any time. That is why cricket never appealed to me - I don't go for vicarious pleasure for hours at a stretch.

    The twist here is that in the US many tennis players prefer to watch other team sports rather than tennis, or even golf or Nascar. And God forbid they discuss tennis with any of their non-tennis friends. And sadly that probably also applies to players like Roddick, Fish or Blake who make it a point to refer to their home teams and so on.
     
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  27. jswinf

    jswinf Professional

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    I think I remember from other threads that you've confessed to being sort of a big, mean-looking guy (running on the sidewalk and people better get out of the way or ?)

    I submit, most respectfully, that that could have something to do with the eagerness of your acquaintances to keep you happy. 8)
     
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  28. Sentinel

    Sentinel Bionic Poster

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    True, that's because you are a fan of a boring player. I could never watch a Ralph match either.

    But since I am a fan of a player who plays real tennis, I'd any day watch him playing live than do ANYTHING else. That moment will not come back.

    Replays and DVDs will never replace the feeling of watching it as it happened. And I am certainly not going to go through my entire day not knowing what happened in real life since i have it taped at home.

    Maybe its a cultural thing. I suppose American life is ruled by television, media, soap, sitcoms, reality shows or whatever. Not to sound condescending.
     
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  29. Sentinel

    Sentinel Bionic Poster

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    Sure thing, pal.

    I won't discuss the US Open 2011 semifinal either, since I am not sure whether sureshs has gotten round to the final set.
     
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  30. Pidgeon

    Pidgeon Semi-Pro

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    Drama Queen
     
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  31. pabletion

    pabletion Professional

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    hahaha! that was funny

    I think youre just gonna have to live with spoilers. Cmon, if youre going to a tennis team meeting and you dont want to know the score of a match probably most of the people at the meeting know and want to talk about (i.e. the WTF final), should they not speak about it because you havent watched it? Even if you let them all know in advance that you havent watched it and you would like to stay ignorant about the score, wouldnt that be kinda selfish?

    Hey, I hear ya. I tape sports a lot too (tennis, soccer) but sometimes its just inevitable unless you completely isolate yourself! Sometimes it just doesnt happen.
     
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  32. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    That is because you don't play tennis at all. If you did, you will realize that you can watch Fed as many times as you want, even sitting in a wheelchair, but the precious times in your life when you can play tennis are limited.

    I watch tennis only to see if there is anything I can learn to improve my play. Otherwise I am not interested. Pros will come and go but the game will remain.

    I also don't watch cricket, soccer, Olympics etc for more than half an hour or so. Not interested in watching others perform.
     
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  33. LuckyR

    LuckyR Legend

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    Why should it occur to someone who took the time and energy to watch a match in real time, to "protect" the ignorance (of the outcome) of someone who rightly decided that watching the game was less important than something else they wanted to do? If the game wasn't important enough to watch in real time, then it isn't all that important, right?
     
    Last edited: Nov 29, 2011
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  34. Staarr

    Staarr New User

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    Well, it was a *TENNIS* crowd - I would have been surprised if no one mentioned it. We were disappointed as well to find out that it was aired on ESPN since we had planned our day around the tennis channel schedule and missed the whole first set. But what a great match it was!!! Love Tsonga!
     
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  35. Netzroller

    Netzroller Semi-Pro

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    There was a great 'how I met you mother' episode (2.14) on spoilers and sports :)

    This would seem like a very wise post if it didn't come from someone with over 18400 posts on an online board... :lol:
     
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