The "Utterly Useless Items You Can Buy" Thread

Discussion in 'Odds & Ends' started by Cindysphinx, Apr 6, 2011.

  1. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    I think we need a thread for consumer items that are so weird and unnecessary that it's hard to imagine anyone buying them. I will go first.

    OK, so I am flipping through the latest Crate and Barrel catalog, and I come across this little gem. See the lady pushing the plant on some sort of wheelie thing?

    [​IMG]


    She is using "The Pot Mover." Yes, that's right. If you have $49.95 plus shipping and handling, you can be the first on your block to own a device that is good for nothing other than moving giant plants (up to 165 pounds!) around your home. Pot and plant not included.

    What will they think of next?
     
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  2. BPeeps

    BPeeps New User

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    Of course, that's assuming any of us has the "green thumb" capability to grow a houseplant large enough to need a pot mower.

    To this thread, I contribute the "sauna belt"...that's right, folks...sweat off those extra pounds right from your belly!

    Will modern miracles ever cease????

    http://www.saunabelt.org/
     
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  3. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    Someone gave me one of these for Christmas:

    [​IMG]

    It is an automatic pot stirrer. You have a sauce on the stove, and the recipe says "Stir continuously." Drat! You can't possibly manage that without succumbing to exhaustion.

    All you have to do is pull out this battery-operated device, put it in the pot and it will rotate and stir for you.

    I donated it to the Salvation Army, where I am sure it found a good home.
     
    #3
  4. BPeeps

    BPeeps New User

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    OMG...I saw that in an ad on tv and just shook my head because I couldn't believe that it was actually real. I couldn't figure out how in the world that thing could possibly work.
     
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  5. flyinghippos101

    flyinghippos101 Legend

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    #5
  6. subz

    subz Rookie

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    Actually it very useful if you have to maintain a nice garden and have big pots. They are very heavy, we have some in my home and I can see why people would like to buy such an item. Its not completely useless !
     
    #6
  7. spaceman_spiff

    spaceman_spiff Hall of Fame

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    Here in the UK, I've seen ads for the hands-free home soap dispenser for your antibacterial soap. It's so that you don't get the germs on your hands that a normal manual dispenser would be covered with.

    Given that the whole point of a soap dispenser is to dispense a substance that will kill the germs on your hands and arms, it seems extremely pointless. Ooh, I don't want to get germs on my hands seconds before I wash them with antibacterial soap.
     
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  8. Power Player

    Power Player Talk Tennis Guru

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    That's great. I bet in the ad has all the cliches :

    "Tired of having to waste time and energy STIRRING your sauces while cooking??"

    - shows mom completely exhausted trying to stir spaghetti sauce while children run around her raising hell.
     
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  9. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    Why do people need to move pots?

    I have two pots in the front of my home. They are not that big. I don't move them, though. If I need to adjust their position, I tip them over a bit and roll them to their new location.

    And if you need to move pots, why not just have one of those wheelie thingies people use to move heavy things like refrigerators. What's that thing called? Then you could move whatever you wanted and not just pots. My husband has one of those in the basement, but we've never used it to move pots.
     
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  10. spaceman_spiff

    spaceman_spiff Hall of Fame

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    There you go thinking rationally again. You really need to turn off that part of your brain if you want to get through life without ripping your hair out.
     
    #10
  11. LuckyR

    LuckyR Legend

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    I am a firm believer in the Alton Brown philosophy that any tool should be able to do at least 2 things, preferably a lot more.
     
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  12. mikeler

    mikeler G.O.A.T.

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  13. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    Have you ever wanted to keep fish as pets but lack the floor space for one of those sprawling aquariums? Your problem is solved by the "Fish 'n Flush Toilet Aquarium"!

    [​IMG]

    For the low, low introductory price of $429!

    Call now. Operators are on stand-by!
     
    #13
  14. Ronaldo

    Ronaldo G.O.A.T.

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    A Pot Mover for moving giant plants around your house? http://i221.photobucket.com/albums/dd273/kyler32291/gigantic_outdoor_marijuana_plant.jpg
     
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  15. Totai

    Totai Professional

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    If the fish dies, Autoflush!
     
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  16. r2473

    r2473 Legend

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    This useless item is often purchased with an expensive, shiny rock. However, that appears to only be a small portion of the total cost over a lifetime.

    Upkeep and maintenance costs can run hundreds of thousands of dollars.

    The return policy is brutal as well :)

    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Apr 6, 2011
    #16
  17. Totai

    Totai Professional

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    That beach is really ugly
     
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  18. 813wilson

    813wilson Rookie

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    Dude, lighten up. She seems to have a pretty good figure, nice hair, well dressed....

    Oh wait, you said beach. I thought you said....
     
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