Things Pros Get to Do That You'll NEVER Get Away With!

Discussion in 'Adult League & Tournament Talk' started by vandre, Jan 26, 2010.

  1. vandre

    vandre Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2007
    Messages:
    1,743
    Location:
    no man's land
    the purpose of this thread is to list all of those quirks and behaviors that you'll never get away with in league play. since i started the thread, i'll start the list:


    • toweling off after every point. i've played in some hot indoor facilities, but c'mon!
     
    #1
  2. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2005
    Messages:
    34,752
    Gesturing to the ballkid to bring me the towel

    Asking the umpire to discipline the crowd

    Asking for 3 balls and selecting 2

    Having 3 different sports drinks close at hand

    Turning down some of the autograph-seeking fans
     
    #2
  3. spot

    spot Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2005
    Messages:
    2,438
    Location:
    Atlanta
    The women who make someone else hold the second ball for them.
     
    #3
  4. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2005
    Messages:
    34,752
    Picking my butt
     
    #4
  5. JRstriker12

    JRstriker12 Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2006
    Messages:
    3,364
    I guess you don't play mixed dubs ;)

    -Asking for a hawk eye challenge
    -Getting your racket restrung in the middle of a match.
    -Taking multiple medical time-outs.
    -Picking your behind before every serve.
    -Berating officials.
     
    #5
  6. BMC9670

    BMC9670 Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Nov 24, 2008
    Messages:
    2,985
    Getting paid to win!:)
     
    #6
  7. stoo

    stoo Semi-Pro

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2009
    Messages:
    485
    Location:
    Help, I'm steppin' into the twilight zone....
    Getting paid anything! :)
     
    #7
  8. papatenis

    papatenis Semi-Pro

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2009
    Messages:
    526
    Getting coached during their match
    Match delayed due to high heat index
    Ball kids removing bugs from court
    Braking multiple racquets during match. (we can't afford to do that)
    Signing autographs!
     
    #8
  9. spot

    spot Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2005
    Messages:
    2,438
    Location:
    Atlanta
    Our team got sponsored by a bar- You can get paid if you just ask enough people.
     
    #9
  10. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2005
    Messages:
    34,752
    Getting a streaker to run across the court
     
    #10
  11. gameboy

    gameboy Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Jul 10, 2009
    Messages:
    1,620
    Carry a 20 racquet bag filled with equipment and not look like a d-bag.
     
    #11
  12. spot

    spot Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2005
    Messages:
    2,438
    Location:
    Atlanta
    Seriously there are mixed doubles teams where the girl makes the guy hold the second ball? I have NEVER seen that and I can't even imagine a girl asking. The only time I have ever seen it is when ultra beginners come out to play tennis and wear shorts that don't have pockets.
     
    #12
  13. jefferson

    jefferson Semi-Pro

    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2008
    Messages:
    658
    Have someone else make our calls!
     
    #13
  14. goran_ace

    goran_ace Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Jun 24, 2009
    Messages:
    2,833
    Location:
    At Large
    Impregnate a model in the broom closet at Nobu

    [​IMG]
     
    #14
  15. goober

    goober Legend

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2004
    Messages:
    8,491
    My favorite would be to call for trainer and get a massage in the middle of the match. :)
     
    #15
  16. beckham

    beckham Semi-Pro

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2008
    Messages:
    722
    Location:
    California
    The latest says in was in a hallway between the broom closet and bathrooms. Even Worse!
     
    #16
  17. gameboy

    gameboy Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Jul 10, 2009
    Messages:
    1,620
    I think you are mis-understanding the original post. It is about what you can GET AWAY with, not what you will NEVER ACHIEVE in the first place... :)
     
    #17
  18. JRstriker12

    JRstriker12 Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2006
    Messages:
    3,364
    Oh - You you said second ball.... MY BAD. I was thinking of holding the third ball.
     
    #18
  19. JRstriker12

    JRstriker12 Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2006
    Messages:
    3,364
    So you think most non-tennis players would get away with this??? I don't think so. They didn't call him "boom-Boom" Becker for nothing.

    BTW- it happend on the stairs- not in the broom closet... (LOL!!!)
    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/new...bu-sex-romp-with-model-occured-on-stairs.html
     
    #19
  20. HitItHarder

    HitItHarder Semi-Pro

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2009
    Messages:
    623
    Location:
    SC
    Having my racquet restrung every 15 games with VS Gut and Lux.

    Changing my shirt in the middle of a match without looking like a dillhole.

    Taking a medical timeout because it is too hot.

    The whole toweling off thing has to be the biggest thing though. I would likely try to stab my opponent if they tried to towel off after every single point.
     
    #20
  21. Jracer77

    Jracer77 Rookie

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2007
    Messages:
    239
    I've played twice with women who wanted me to hold the second ball for them. One said she would only wear shorts with no pockets because she thought shorts with pockets made her look fat. I'm not kidding. I didn't ask the other one her reason.
     
    Last edited: Jan 26, 2010
    #21
  22. precision2b

    precision2b Semi-Pro

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2009
    Messages:
    626
    #22
  23. goran_ace

    goran_ace Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Jun 24, 2009
    Messages:
    2,833
    Location:
    At Large
    I don't think these are too bad in league or tournament play if you are playing in really hot and humid weather and/or you are one of those people who sweats a lot. When I played tournaments I always changed shirts before going into a third set. It would bother me if someone towelled off after every point just to slow down the pace, but I've played some really sweaty guys who really needed to towel off after every point. I am more annoyed at those guys who sweat so much that the balls get wet from their hands or pockets.
     
    #23
  24. beststringer

    beststringer Rookie

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2010
    Messages:
    252
    Location:
    Northern Cal
    i think they get to play good tennis while on drugs.
     
    #24
  25. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2006
    Messages:
    15,067
    After a big win, grabbing someone's camera and signing the lens with Sharpie.

    Throwing their sweat-soaked clothing into the stands.

    Cindy -- still waiting to see the first female player whip off her shirt and toss it to a lucky fan
     
    #25
  26. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2005
    Messages:
    34,752
    Brandi Chastain:

    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Jan 26, 2010
    #26
  27. JRstriker12

    JRstriker12 Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2006
    Messages:
    3,364
    LOL- I was thinking about the sharpie thing.

    I think Brandi Chastain from the US Women's soccer team sort of beat them to it...

    [​IMG]

    Besides, (IMHO) many of the top WTA players wear shirts aren't wearing shirts too often... except maybe Justine.
     
    #27
  28. JRstriker12

    JRstriker12 Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2006
    Messages:
    3,364
    That's Brandi. Mia Hamm wore #9.
     
    #28
  29. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2005
    Messages:
    34,752
    Cindy will be the first to do it in tennis.
     
    #29
  30. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2006
    Messages:
    15,067
    Puh.

    Some years ago, I ran a 10K in June. I was still a novice runner. I badly misjudged the weather and wore a long-sleeve shirt with a jog bra underneath.

    Mid-race, I became really hot. Lots of people were suffering in the heat. I knew what I needed to do: Strip off that shirt, tie it around my waist, and finish in the jog bra. I flat-out couldn't bring myself to do it. I would rather have left on a stretcher than take off that shirt.

    So no, I won't be the first woman to rip off her shirt rather than falling to the ground after a win. :)

    Cindy -- thinking Topaz could be talked into it
     
    #30
  31. Tennisman912

    Tennisman912 Semi-Pro

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2008
    Messages:
    487
    Location:
    NW Ohio
    I have also had a fair number of ladies in mixed ask me to hold the ball (with many reasons). Everything from the it makes me look fat, it throws off my balance and annoys me, I wore the wrong pants with no pockets, it is uncomfortable, my husband has always held it for me and it may come out during a point (like that couldn’t happen to me too). This is over a long period of time and no offense to the ladies as it is not a big deal to me. Just like how some people you play with have to have all three balls and other don’t care or don’t want them all.

    I actually don’t think the frequent towel offs are much of a big deal for a pro compared to the rest of us. Why? First, they don’t have to waste time picking up balls, someone brings it to them when they motion for it and most important, they are working much harder and much longer than any of us can even imagine. They can easily towel off and get to the line in time to not delay play. Of course if the whole year will be like the Australian open has been, the servers don’t seem to have much to worry about concerning much time they take as has been commented on many times as not being enforced so far down under. No one has even been warned for it as of yet on a show court.

    The biggest benefit to me is all the fringe benefits. Free and custom made racquets in unlimited numbers, free clothes, traveling the world. Of course no one mentions the downsides if you are very well known. Can’t go anywhere without making a scene. Paparazzi. Can’t just melt into the crowd and go about your business. That is a heavy price for many.

    I thought every one had women falling at their feet and plenty of quickie opportunities. After all we make quick posts all the time. Oops, wrong forum.

    Good tennis

    TM
     
    #31
  32. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2005
    Messages:
    34,752
    Yes you talk to her. She is a little pissed off with me.
     
    #32
  33. robby c

    robby c Semi-Pro

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2007
    Messages:
    682
    At the District championships, I had a racquet restrung in the middle of a match. I tossed it over the fence to a friend and he carried it to the club's stringer. He brought it back in 20 minutes. I did tip the stringer after the match.
    Robby C
     
    #33
  34. vandre

    vandre Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2007
    Messages:
    1,743
    Location:
    no man's land
    sweet!!!! :)

    did it come back in one of those spiffy plastic bags???
     
    #34
  35. Larrysümmers

    Larrysümmers Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2009
    Messages:
    3,990
    Location:
    1313 Mockingbird Lane.
    Practice shirtless without looking like a dbag
    Having 9 sticks and not looking like a tool
    change my shirt during the switch and not have people question it
    wear a bandana and not look cocky
    yellin VAMOS and not getting yelled at by my coach.
     
    #35
  36. NickH87

    NickH87 Semi-Pro

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2008
    Messages:
    666
    Cry when I lose a tournament in the finals.
     
    #36
  37. ChuDat

    ChuDat Professional

    Joined:
    May 21, 2007
    Messages:
    1,453
    -Challenging a call with hawkeye
    -threatening line judges/umpires
    -play a match with over 500 people watching
    -Win a gs/ms title
     
    #37
  38. Todd6060

    Todd6060 New User

    Joined:
    May 26, 2009
    Messages:
    37
    Shouting "Come on!"
    Pounding your chest with your fist
    Waving or bowing to the spectators after the match
     
    #38
  39. rasajadad

    rasajadad Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Apr 24, 2006
    Messages:
    1,993
    Location:
    Western MA
    Yelling at my coaches, friends, and family sitting in my "Friends Box" whenever I play a bad point.

    And oh yeah- having a coach, friends, family at a match.

    And I forgot- having a coach.
     
    #39
  40. Gemini

    Gemini Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2004
    Messages:
    1,577
    Location:
    Atlanta, GA
    I actually ask for all 3 balls and only select 2 when serving....
     
    #40
  41. JRstriker12

    JRstriker12 Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2006
    Messages:
    3,364
    Yeah - non tennis players cannot get away with a 20 mill euro quickie - LOL!!
     
    #41
  42. jswinf

    jswinf Professional

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2009
    Messages:
    1,141

    Personally, I never sign autographs. Of course, I've never been asked for one.
     
    #42
  43. thejackal

    thejackal Hall of Fame

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2004
    Messages:
    2,885
    Location:
    Montreal, Canada
    Last edited: Jan 27, 2010
    #43
  44. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2005
    Messages:
    34,752
    I get asked all the time. Whenever I use a credit card.

    These days due to online purchases and several businesses not requiring signatures for amounts less than $10, I am being asked less often.

    My son is also always asking for my autographs. For his daily homework log for school.
     
    #44

Share This Page