Weird Facts About Tennis Stars (Funny as heck)

Discussion in 'Odds & Ends' started by asifallasleep, Jun 2, 2013.

  1. asifallasleep

    asifallasleep Professional

    Sep 9, 2005
    Weird Facts About Tennis Stars

    Andy Murray
    Sources tell us that Andy has a “Braveheart” fixation. He likes to paint his face like Mel Gibson in the movie, wear a kilt, and yell “Freedom!!” to get in a frisky mood with his girlfriend.

    Marion Bartoli
    Last year at the year-end WTA awards event, she won the prestigious, “WTA Player With the Weirdest Dad” award. Previous winners in this event were Mary Pierce, Jelena Dokic, Serena and Venus Williams, and Jennifer Capriati.

    Novak Djokovic
    Djokovic is famous for his on-court impressions of other players, including John McEnroe and Maria Sharapova. This caused him to get into big trouble in his youth after he was sent to develop his game in Germany when he was 14 years old. Apparently, impressions of Hitler, Goering, Goebbels, etc., playing tennis are not considered funny in Germany.

    Ana Ivanovic
    She used to practice on a court placed on a drained pool in Belgrade. She almost drowned once when she didn’t leave the court before the elderly water aerobics was scheduled to start.

    Roger Federer
    Roger speaks German, English, and French fluently. He is said to have refused to learn Spanish out of spite after losing to Nadal the first time at the French Open.

    Maria Sharapova
    Sharapova reportedly began receiving death threats and threatening letters from Anna Kournikova after Sharapova won her first major title, Wimbledon, in 2004.

    Viktoria Azarenka
    Viktoria’s shrieking at the recent Sony Ericsson tournament was measured at 110 decibels, which is equivalent to a jet engine or a rock concert.

    Agnes Radwanska
    The Polish government recently announced an event in Warsaw honoring the tennis star but nobody from the government showed up. Apparently, they had forgotten about it. Luckily, Radwanska had also lost track of the event. In fact, the only people that showed up were foreign visitors and the foreign press corps.

    Jo-Wilfred Tsonga
    Tsonga’s nickname is “The Muhammad Ali of Tennis” due to his facial resemblance to the famous US boxer. His other, more private nickname, on the tour is “Secretariat” the winner of the 1972 horse racing Triple Crown.

    David Ferrer
    There are no weird facts about David Ferrer. His life is as boring as his monotonous baseline game.

    Jennifer Capriati
    Jennifer once set a record for most Jello Shots in an hour at the “Limelight” a very popular nightclub in New York City during the US Open in 1993. Unfortunately, she lost that tournament in the first round, which may or may not have had anything to do with that entire jello-vodka competition the previous night

    Jimmy Connors
    Jimmy married a former Playboy Playmate after previously breaking his engagement to Chris Evert. He later received congratulatory letters from Evert’s three ex-husbands, wishing they had been as perceptive as Jimmy.

    Martina Navratilova
    She went through a “bi-curious” phase briefly before she became a committed lesbian. Her last male lover was John McEnroe. Yes, McEnroe drove her to lesbianism.

    Pete Sampras
    Sampras was famous for his boring, no-nonsense demeanor on the court. A woman who once claimed to have taken his virginity said that she fell asleep during the event.

    Bjorn Borg
    Bjorn had a very weird relationship with his coach/physical trainer/masseuse/racket stringer Lennart Bergelin that bordered on the bizarre. Outsiders whispered that Bergelin was almost like a slave to Borg. One night as a joke, Vitas Gerulaitis bet Borg $1,000 that Bergelin would agree to kill someone if Borg ordered it. Borg ordered Bergelin to “hit” Jimmy Connors. Bergelin nodded and headed towards the exit to carry out the task before being stopped. After Borg’s retirement, Bergelin disappeared into the Stockholm BDSM underground and served as the inspiration for the book, “The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.”

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    Last edited: Jun 2, 2013
  2. Red Rick

    Red Rick Rookie

    Feb 11, 2013
    These are ****ing hilarious, especially the Djokovic one
  3. Say Chi Sin Lo

    Say Chi Sin Lo Legend

    Aug 30, 2005
    Gilles Simon
    He once bored even himself to sleep in a match. Some say it was his match against Andy Murray in AO2013, or was it against Gael Monfils in the match prior?
  4. Overdrive

    Overdrive Legend

    Dec 28, 2012
    Garden of Gethsemane
    Ha, that was funny. :)
  5. dParis

    dParis Hall of Fame

    Nov 30, 2004
    Aww, is he great, or what? Thank you asifallasleep.

    And now, Ladies and Gentlemen, please put your hands together for the one and only, Mr. Don Rickles...!!!

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