What do i do or say?

Discussion in 'Adult League & Tournament Talk' started by willshot, Sep 8, 2011.

  1. willshot

    willshot Semi-Pro

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    I played a mix match yesterday and something odd happened. It was supposed to be an easy match for us.... we won the first 6-1. In the second set I (the guy) was serving for the match at 5-4 Deuce. May partner whom i've never played with dumps a sitter volley into the net. I can tell she was nervous because of her body language. We then group in the baseline to discuss strategy while whispering to each other. Weather was perfect with a slight hint of breeze. While discussing or whispering stradegy, she lays a tiny phart sound. Of course, this made her embarrased and the breeze pushed the scent up my nostrols. I believe she smelt it too. It was lethal and I had no choice but to cough. From that point on.... we lost the second set. Then the 3rd set 2-6.

    This is the first for me and i wasnt sure what to say to her to get her back on game. Anyone had a similar experience?
     
    #1
  2. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    In the future, use signals.
     
    #2
  3. Centryx

    Centryx Semi-Pro

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    hold on wasnt the sound a signal??
     
    #3
  4. Rui

    Rui Rookie

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    I'm thinking that would have been a good time to start laughing.
     
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  5. jdubbs

    jdubbs Hall of Fame

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    Did she lift up one buttock when this happened? She really needs to try to hold those in, perhaps you could suggest some exercises to strengthen her pelvic/buttock region so you can avoid this in the future.

    Also, holding your breath until it passes would be advisable. Did you ask her what she had for lunch? Perhaps a small change in diet would remedy this.
     
    #5
  6. Paul B 40-15

    Paul B 40-15 Guest

    I didn't know women did that sort of thing.
     
    #6
  7. OrangePower

    OrangePower Hall of Fame

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    It was your duty to make her feel comfortable by ripping a fart of your own, to show solidarity and to ease her embarassment.

    If you did not / could not do this, then you have nobody to blame but yourself.
     
    #7
  8. dizzlmcwizzl

    dizzlmcwizzl Hall of Fame

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    Just reach down and pull her finger to get the rest of it out... problem solved, obvioulsy she needed some more relief.
     
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  9. willshot

    willshot Semi-Pro

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    lol. I did that once but not on a tenniscourt. Ended up sharting instead. That wont happen again.
     
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  10. Paul B 40-15

    Paul B 40-15 Guest

    remind her to always say excuse me and not to do it when others are in close proximity.
    otherwise it's better out than in.
     
    #10
  11. mucat

    mucat Hall of Fame

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    When in doubt let it out.
     
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  12. sphinx780

    sphinx780 Professional

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    OP: You were supposed to fan it in your opponents direction, it's obvious that the smell was putrid enough to cost you the match. If you would have redirected it appropriately, you could have saved yourself both the match and your nostrils.


    To the rest: does this qualify as swinging the human racquet?
     
    #12
  13. cknobman

    cknobman Legend

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    How did you not laugh??

    I would have hit the deck and then chimed in with a little musical toot of my own!
     
    #13
  14. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    Women are now competing with men in all fields. We have nowhere left to go.

    In the good old days, only men would belch and fart.
     
    #14
  15. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    I hope not
     
    #15
  16. djNEiGht

    djNEiGht Professional

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    should have said to your partner...
    "now that's the spirit!"
     
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  17. Big_Dangerous

    Big_Dangerous Legend

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    Had to call it an early day eh? Run to your car and drive home as fast as possible. Lmao.

    I've only ever had to take a **** twice while playing. And both times me and partner were done hitting.
     
    #17
  18. dParis

    dParis Hall of Fame

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    This thread reeks... Of win!

    :mrgreen:
     
    #18
  19. Sakkijarvi

    Sakkijarvi Semi-Pro

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    My college roommate buddy could do wonders with this and a Bic lighter, could entertain a room. Course everyone was drunk and had a sense of humor. I don't know how the pampered day kittens of tennis clubs roll on this one.
     
    #19
  20. willshot

    willshot Semi-Pro

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    Saw my x-partner today again a crt next to me and she gave me a dirtyasss look. wtf you farted and lost the match, not me! I'm going to tell everyone at the club what happened now.
     
    #20
  21. tennis tom

    tennis tom Hall of Fame

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    NO! But I played with a guy who belched about 50 times during a match.

    To break the ice, why not say something like, "Mexican food for lunch?

    I think this thread needs a woman's POV--Oh, Cindy!
     
    #21
  22. jht32

    jht32 Rookie

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    Just tell her..."It's okay, sometimes we win by default, sometimes we lose by de-fart."
     
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  23. willshot

    willshot Semi-Pro

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    LOL hahahaha
     
    #23
  24. shazbot

    shazbot Semi-Pro

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    I fart all the time when playing. But I don't play mixed doubles and men don't give a sh*t when each other fart.
     
    #24
  25. djNEiGht

    djNEiGht Professional

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    i was telling the story to my wife...of course she is half listening while surfing the internet. i come to the part when the OP tells of the time the two are talking strategy and my wife interrupts...

    "we don't usually talk strategy when we play...did we talk this past weekend? oh wait...you are reading that forum thing again..."
     
    #25

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