What Would You Straight Guys Do?

Discussion in 'Odds & Ends' started by CivicLx, Jan 4, 2006.

  1. CivicLx

    CivicLx Professional

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    Ok I'll try to make this fairly short. I'm just wondering what you guys would do in this situation.

    The Sunday before Christmas, my mom and I are at Macy's mens checking out some clothes I like. We get help from this guy and I wondered to myself if he was gay only because it seemed like he had good fashion sense. (Ok with saying that, I do not have anything against gay people and I don't just assume every well dressed guy is gay...and I'm not gay...I don't think:mrgreen: )

    Ok so he helps us and eventually I take off and my mom stays a little longer and gets me some clothes. After she left, she called me and said the guy's name was Stephen and he was going into the Navy for avionics and he was going to school in Pensacola. I did Avionics in the Marines and went to Pensacola so she thought I could give him advice.

    Fawk people I'm sorry...I guess I don't have to give every single detail lol...ok short version...this guy is gay and I guess he is attracted to me and now that I know this, I have hung out with him once. I have not told him I am straight, he has not told me he is gay, but I know he is gay and I think he can figure that I am straight.

    I have nothing at all against gay people. I've never really had any gay friend that I know of, but having one who is does not bother me at all...even if this person is attracted to me as long as he knows I am not gay and does not try to pursue anything, then hey I'm cool...no really I am cool...my mom said so:mrgreen:

    But what would you guys do? Would you still be friends and kick it? Would you atleast try to drop hints to make sure he knows you're not gay...I mean, I could have kicked it with him and then said something like, "damn check out that chicks fat ass" while beating on my chest and panting heavily...but I have not gone out of my way to let him know I'm straight just because I thought it might be awkward.

    I don't know whatever...if anyone is still with me in this post, what would you do?
     
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  2. wings56

    wings56 Professional

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    I don't know what to say to that
     
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  3. bigserving

    bigserving Semi-Pro

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    I meet straight women every day. We do not need to determine, up front, if one of us has sexual intentions for the other. If it happens, it happens.

    When I meet gay men, I merely treat them the way that I treat women that I find unattractive. Sex or relationships are probably out of the question, but other things might work OK.

    It sounds like you have some questions about your own sexuality. That being said, I have the feeling that you are going to be spending more and more time with gay men. You go boy!

    Keep us posted with what you find out.
     
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  4. Return_Ace

    Return_Ace Professional

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    Lol! well.. it's not really a laughin matter but uhhh hehe, it warrants a nice lil chuckle ;).

    Anyways, i think you should ask him straight up if he is gay, and make it clear you are straight, and also say that you have nothing against gays and will still remain friends even if he is.
     
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  5. supersmash

    supersmash Semi-Pro

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    Take him to a strip joint...where there are FEMALE strippers.
     
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  6. Freedom

    Freedom Professional

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    Lol. Yes.
     
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  7. PM_

    PM_ Professional

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    Ummm, haven't you ever thought of talking about women...like you're interested in them. What the heck do you talk to your straight friends about, tennis???????????????
     
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  8. XFactorer

    XFactorer Hall of Fame

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    Ok... being one of the "gays"... here's my take...

    Does it really matter if you're straight and he's gay? Hanging out is hanging out. ANd when hanging out, do you really need to be like, "Hey, I bang chicks." No! Just 'cause I find some guy attractive, I don't jump him immediately.

    And you mentioned he didn't tell you he's gay... so you CANNOT assume he is. I know some really effeminate guys who are straight. Someone's sexuality is not your business until that person tells you.

    What I'm trying to say is... treat him like any other friend of yours.

    PS... I like how you make sweeping generalizations that guys with good fashion sense are gay. (Yes, I'm being sarcastic)

    PSS... and just 'cause the guy is gay (if he is at all) does not automatically make him attracted to you no matter how handsome you think you are.

    PSSS... :)
     
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  9. doriancito

    doriancito Hall of Fame

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    dont worry, its not a felony to have gay friends, whayt i would do is when ever i'd go back to macy's i would see a nice lady and tell him "wouldnt you want a piece of that?" and he says yes...then hes str8 if he says no he is gay, but you saying that already tells you are str8....i guess this would work
     
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  10. FedererUberAlles

    FedererUberAlles Professional

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    What's the worry? I don't think homosexuals need to be ostracized.
     
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  11. legolas

    legolas Banned

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    lol, wait til he tells u that he really like su, then tell him u dont like gay dudes, thats what i did
     
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  12. XFactorer

    XFactorer Hall of Fame

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    I don't think it should even be a deal you have to ask others for help with... good lord! Perhaps someone's insecure with his own sexuality... ;-)
     
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  13. armand

    armand Banned

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    Keep this in mind: Gay dudes very often have many attractive female friends.
     
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  14. Slazenger

    Slazenger Professional

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    HA HA HA HA HA. Too funny!
     
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  15. XFactorer

    XFactorer Hall of Fame

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    Oh yeah! :rolleyes:
     
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  16. 35ft6

    35ft6 Legend

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    Something similar happened to me. I had accidentally walked into a gay bar called the The 9 Inch Rooster. Unfortunately, I was wearing my butt-less chaps and Bette Midler half shirt, giving the men there the mistaken impression that I was one of them, a gay. I got all drunk and started dancing on the bar, turning this into a misunderstanding of Three's Company proportions. It was awkward when I had to interrupt the gay orgy and tell the guy I was kissing that I was straight. I broke a lot of hearts that night.

    Seriously, do whatever you feel like. Tell him "hey, just so there's no misunderstanding, and I may be being very presumptuous, but just wanted to let you know I'm straight... like totally straight... straight enough to not be freaked out by hanging out with a gay guy, but I just want you to know that..."

    Or maybe he's NOT gay, so wait it out. But making a random comment about a cute girl is not a bad idea.
     
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  17. sdslyout

    sdslyout Rookie

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    unless the friends you hang with are straight, then no worries. the sex thing always gets in the way. be up front talk and let him know. now if your unsure about yourself then it's time you should know. Somewhere along the way a person who is gay, they know it. some hide it others sport it. if your not gay and you hang with someone who likes you it's a matter of time for you to feel uncomfortable around them because you know what he wants. it's really not cool to string anyone, him/her along and use them then break thier heart when you say NO. So, is it girls, mmmmm or guys ......... ???
     
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  18. ktownva

    ktownva Semi-Pro

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    I don't care if you are straight or gay. I just wanna know how you plan to get laid at all drivin' a civic lx.
     
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  19. slice bh compliment

    slice bh compliment G.O.A.T.

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    Hey CivicLX:
    Just one man's opinion here [from the straight guy's perspective, since you asked]....
    If you had written, "damn check out that chick's phat ass...or FINE ass" or "beautiful rack" or otherwise objectified a woman in a more hetero, positive way, this whole thing would have been less ambiguous.

    As I re-read the above lines, plus the title of this thread, "What would you straight guys do?" ... I'm thinking, "well, that says it all. CivicLX is confused (sexually) and is needing a combination of advice and attention".

    Well, you're definitely getting the attention (and I'm still smiling about 35ft6 and ktownva's posts). As far as advice goes: of course you should hang out with him. What is the big deal? Worst case: awkwardness, and you do not meet again. Best case, one or both learns something about himself, the guy benefits from your avionics advice and you gain a friend (and his beautiful girlfriends). [<<< sorry. selfish, hetero-man tendency there]

    Note: while hanging out, if you overhear passersby referring to you guys as "the ambiguously gay duo", you won't be surprised or offended, right?

    Oh, and you might just want to ask your mother if she thinks you're gay. Tell your dad all about that conversation and keep an audiotape of it for your ten most homophobic buddies.;)

    Kidding. Take care, CivicLX.
    Wishing you the best.
    --slice.
     
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  20. 35ft6

    35ft6 Legend

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    Next time you guys are hanging out (no pun intended) say, "you know what I could go for right now? Some vagina." See if he agrees that vagina would be good.
     
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  21. slice bh compliment

    slice bh compliment G.O.A.T.

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    I'm still laughing.
    Hey 35ft6, are you Norm MacDonald or Jack Handey?
     
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  22. armand

    armand Banned

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    LMAO! Where do you come up with this stuff? Oh Mercy
     
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  23. Deuce

    Deuce Banned

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    That post #1 in this thread exists at all betrays the fact that the above statement is untrue.
     
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  24. 35ft6

    35ft6 Legend

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    You're so right! I could totally see Norm saying this. Haha.
    I don't know, but my ex-gf hated it. :(
     
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  25. 35ft6

    35ft6 Legend

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    Also, one day when you're both hungry, ask him if he'd like rather go get a hot dog, or a taco. If he chooses a taco then he's straight. A hot dog means he's gay. A hot dog in a taco shell means he's bi-sexual. If he answers "I'd rather have sex with you" then that pretty much means he's gay also.
     
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  26. Joe Average

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    I think it's kind of disingenuous of people to say that sexual orientation doesn't matter in friendship. I have cordial relationships with many gay men. But they're not friendships. Sexuality DOES matter. A woman with whom you were romantically drawn to, but who didn't reciprocate these feelings, would let you know in subtle or not so subtle ways that she wasn't interested. "My BOYFRIEND and I were at this party last week ... " or "You're like a brother to me." She'd sense your feelings for her, and would be acting irresponsibly if she "led you on." So if you're sensing these feelings from this guy, you really should tell him you're straight.
     
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  27. Deuce

    Deuce Banned

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    I disagree. One's sexuality sometimes matters in a friendship, and sometimes doesn't matter at all.

    We often hear that straight men 'sense' that gay men have sexual type feeling for them. I believe that the main reason this occurs so frequently (almost every instance that a straight man and gay man relate) is because to the straight world, homosexuals are identified not only mainly by their sexual orientation, but entirely by their sexual orientation. "Gay" is by far the main and most important element of this man's identity. The "gay guy" is always the "gay guy". With this type of label, it is all but impossible for anyone around him to not think of his sexuality. An inherent by-product of this is that straight men automatically assume that the gay man's entire life is consumed by sexual thoughts - and so he must have sexual feelings for every man. Straight men tend to forget, however, that it is they themselves who have attached this permanent and all-consuming label of "gay guy" on the other person, which accompanies the homosexual everywhere.

    As most people know, the attaching of this "gay guy" label - it's like a permanent tattoo attached to the person - is done primarily because those attaching it are, for one reason or another, threatened by homosexuality.
     
    #27
  28. ironchef21

    ironchef21 Rookie

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    I don't see the big deal. If you want to be friends with the guy then stay friends with him. His orientation shouldn't matter all that much.
     
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  29. CivicLx

    CivicLx Professional

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    aww too many funny replies to quote but just to make clear, I am quite certain I am not gay and the reason I'm assuming he likes me is because I went back to see if he was at work to chat about Navy and what he can expect...well he wasn't there on this day so I left my number with one of his coworkers. I talked to this coworker about a week later and she told me that when she gave him my number she said something like, "i have a present for you" and after receiving my number he said, "this is the best present I could get I'm going to put his number in my phone right now" lol

    Anyway, I just assumed that most straight men would not mind having gay friends as long as the friends weren't attracted to them. sorry if that last statement or the last several statements are confusing:mrgreen:

    and what I said about making the comment, I just feel like if I were to make a comment like that, it would just be awkward like I'm trying to be blunt but beat around the bush at the same time...

    anyway thanks for all the funny replies and the good advice and if any of you guys want to have a little fun tonight, give me a call ;) ha ha just joking...no really I am just joking

    thanks again
     
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  30. Geezer Guy

    Geezer Guy Hall of Fame

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    Sounds to me like CivicLx has a new boyfriend - not that there's anything wrong with that.
     
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  31. CivicLx

    CivicLx Professional

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    haha...i mean honestly it's cool but like I said I just figured that most people would mind but perhaps my assumption is wrong. He's actually leaving for boot camp on the 10th...I didn't really enjoy the Marines but I sure like talking about military life now that I'm out:D
     
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  32. Mr.Federer

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    ahhh, the answer to all of man's questions...
     
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  33. Kaptain Karl

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    Good post.

    - KK
     
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  34. theace21

    theace21 Hall of Fame

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    Except, All you other friends that thought you were straight will wonder. Hang with a larger group if it makes you feel ackward...A friend is a friend...
     
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  35. theace21

    theace21 Hall of Fame

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    A friend of my had this great line once. He was in between relationships. I gay guy was coming on to him, and he wasn't interested. His reply to me,"It is nice at least someone finds me attractive". Just laugh if off - if you are not interested. If he is a friend he will understand...
     
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  36. Rickson

    Rickson G.O.A.T.

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    I think you may be exploring a bit and you're gonna wind up regretting it if you sleep with him. You feel that you're not gay for the most part, but you're not completely sure and that leads you to the danger zone. Don't hang out with this guy anymore because if you turn out not to be gay, and you "experiment", you're gonna scar yourself for life and it's just not worth that kind of damage. You're not gay, you're not gay, get that in your head and don't forget it!
     
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  37. Tchocky

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    Ask yourself would you like to be friends if you thought he was straight? If the answer is yes, then why not. Rejecting someone because you think they are gay is homophobic. I would see if you can get some kind of discount at Macy's before you reject him.
     
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  38. Rickson

    Rickson G.O.A.T.

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    What kind of sick advice is this? Don't encourage a confused, but straight young man to have sex with other men. That was a disgusting post!
     
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  39. Rickson

    Rickson G.O.A.T.

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    What kind of sick advice is this? Don't encourage a confused, but straight young man to have sex with other men. That was a disgusting post!
     
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  40. Rickson

    Rickson G.O.A.T.

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    What kind of sick advice is this? Don't encourage a confused, but straight young man to have sex with other men. That was a disgusting post!
     
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  41. CivicLx

    CivicLx Professional

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    what the hell did i get myself into with this post? ha ha i am not confused about my sexuality at all...believe i'm definitely into girls...but for me bottom line is if he's gay and he really does like me it's no biggie as long as he realizes I'm straight and that I'm just a homey and not a ****:mrgreen:
     
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  42. Rickson

    Rickson G.O.A.T.

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    OK, that's cool, but don't experiment because you'll regret it for life. Did you see the Greek guy on blind date? He claimed he needed to find out if he was straight or gay so he slept with men twice. Once wasn't bad enough? Anyway, he claims he's straight, but his blind date told him she couldn't be with any man who slept with another man. Stick to girls and live a normal life.
     
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  43. CivicLx

    CivicLx Professional

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    oh yes i plan to stick it to girls as often as possible...hey rickson you have any sisters:mrgreen: just kidding mang
     
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  44. Kaptain Karl

    Kaptain Karl Hall Of Fame

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    Years ago I lived in the "gay" section -- at least that's what I kept hearing, after I'd already moved-in -- of a medium-sized city in upstate NY. (New job. New town.) I lived there for 2.5 years and enjoyed it very much.

    One day I was talking with one of my neighbors outside our apartment building. After covering various subjects, the direction of his conversation switched in such a way, I realized he was exploring my availability. Something in my expression "clued him" to my surprise.

    He quickly apologized, asking my forgiveness and telling me he thought everyone in the building was gay.

    We both got a kick out of that last statement, when I wished out-loud the girl next door to me (with the loose headboard) and her boyfriend knew that "rule" of the building.

    Relax.

    - KK
     
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  45. armand

    armand Banned

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    Boy, were you ever with the wrong woman!
     
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  46. Geezer Guy

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    Sounds like good advice from someone's who's been there, done that... and done him... and regretted it.
     
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  47. RiosTheGenius

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    I think you like this dude..... starting this thread about that means that you think about it. don't be afraid to come out man..... there's nothing wrong with it.... i mean, Hrbaty did it in 2005... you can be the next one. just get yourself a pink shirt with holes and you're all set.
    you like this dude , you know it.
     
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  48. Porsche CGT

    Porsche CGT New User

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    Did you train at NAS? I live in Pensacola so I'm just wondering.
     
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  49. jhhachamp

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    Haha, I was thinking the same exact thing! No offence to Rickson if I am off the mark.
     
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  50. jhhachamp

    jhhachamp Hall of Fame

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    To the original poster, just talk about all the girls you have banged or want to bang. Me and my guy friends talk about this stuff all the time. Or just drop a line like, "damn, that girl has such a nice body, i'd love to fool around with her." Most guys I know talk like this, so I don't think it would be awkward at all and he would certainly figure out you are not gay.
     
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