what's the largest animal you could kill with your forehand?

Discussion in 'Odds & Ends' started by yourmom08, Sep 13, 2007.

  1. yourmom08

    yourmom08 Rookie

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    so you're playing tennis and the zoo next door opens the gates and lets the animals run free. You have to defend yourself with your forehand, what sort of beasts could you best? I think i would kill a llama for sure if i hit it square in the dome, (as long as it didn't spit in my eye first). What animals could you smite with your groundstrokes?
     
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  2. Dilettante

    Dilettante Hall of Fame

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    I could kill canned tuna.
     
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  3. Hot Sauce

    Hot Sauce Hall of Fame

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    A hummingbird.
     
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  4. Zets147

    Zets147 Banned

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    Let's see... I could probably kill a gecko with my perfect control and pure power.
     
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  5. TokyopunK

    TokyopunK Professional

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    A rare, extinct, galapagos albatross penguin
     
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  6. Dilettante

    Dilettante Hall of Fame

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    Extinct yet? You must have a really good forehand.
     
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  7. king of swing

    king of swing Rookie

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    depends...if the lion roars and is at most 200 meters away I'm pretty sure I can lodge the ball down its throat effectively killing it....
     
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  8. Dilettante

    Dilettante Hall of Fame

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    So if the lion don't roar, you're basically screwed up.
     
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  9. king of swing

    king of swing Rookie

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    yup ;) lol ^^^
     
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  10. king of swing

    king of swing Rookie

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    maybe in the eye...buy me enough time to get away...but I dont know if my
    forehand is that good...
     
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  11. Dilettante

    Dilettante Hall of Fame

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    I think that a tennis ball right in lion's eye will make you be even more screwed up.
     
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  12. Fedace

    Fedace Banned

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    Maybe Rafa.
     
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  13. topspin_17

    topspin_17 Rookie

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    what about a wild safin? ;)
     
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  14. lethalfang

    lethalfang Professional

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    Just hand him the racquet, so he will eat the racquet instead of you.
    [​IMG]
     
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  15. Hot Sauce

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    Wooly Mammoth.
     
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  16. ShooterMcMarco

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    Rhino, 3 of them at once
     
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  17. tennispro11

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    A Toucan. :)
     
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  18. phoony

    phoony Banned

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    Mammalia :-D.
     
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  19. origmarm

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    Serena Williams
     
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  20. Supernatural_Serve

    Supernatural_Serve Professional

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    The OP said zoo animals not barnyard animals.
     
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  21. gerikoh

    gerikoh Semi-Pro

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    load it the ball with tnt and i'll return it with my forehand and mostly kill an elephant :D
     
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  22. PimpMyGame

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    A tiger......................moth.
     
    Last edited: Sep 14, 2007
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  23. origmarm

    origmarm Hall of Fame

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  24. Sean Dugan

    Sean Dugan Rookie

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    I was playing in Tampa a few years ago and I hit a bigass dragon fly (dragonflyus bigassus) that was hovering around the net with a topspin forehand.

    The dragon fly immediately plunged to earth (a distance of about six feet but that is the equivalent of 100 stories to a dragon fly of average height.)

    My friend and I laughed at how odd the event was. I'd like to say I was aiming for the dragon fly and nailed it with my pinpoint accuracy but hitting it was a random event.

    A few minutes passed and damn if that dragon fly didn't regain consciousness, recover its composure, dust itself off, and fly away without so much as a whimper as if nothing out of the ordinary had occurred. He had one helluva tale to tell that night at the dragon fly watering hole!!

    When you consider the force equation, (a 2.2 ounce tennis ball traveling at approximately 60 mph colliding with a dragon fly that weighs all of 7 grams), that is the rough equivalent of a 200 pound man being struck by an 1800 pound object traveling at 60 mph! Ouch!

    Fortunately for me, he was a really cool dragon fly and opted not to pursue personal injury litigation. (I happen to know he is normally represented by the famed insect litigator Johnny Cockroach.)

    That was one bad ass dragon fly!!!!!!!!
     
    Last edited: Sep 14, 2007
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  25. Shahar26

    Shahar26 Rookie

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    OOOOOOOuch!
     
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  26. Janne

    Janne Semi-Pro

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    A mammoth!
     
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  27. Mastermind

    Mastermind Rookie

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    I could direct my forehand downward, into the ocean from the deck of a boat, and even with water resistance, kill a blue whale.
     
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  28. Dedans Penthouse

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    I could kill a Tyranasaurus Rex with my forehand except that T-Rex is extinct. Then again, so is my forehand.
     
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  29. Breaker

    Breaker Legend

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    Anyone happy the dinos are extinct?

    Thank my forehand.
     
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  30. TheJRK

    TheJRK Rookie

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    Slightly off topic... but didn't Chuck Norris create the universe by hitting his forehand into the blackness of space?
     
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  31. njjohan

    njjohan Rookie

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    I'll get Venus for ya!
     
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  32. Dilettante

    Dilettante Hall of Fame

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    ...and what's the biggest animal you could kill with your drop shot?

    Are mushrooms considered "animals"?
     
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  33. Silent

    Silent Semi-Pro

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    a porcupine
     
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