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-   -   How to get someone to make you their coach? (http://tt.tennis-warehouse.com/showthread.php?t=467223)

MarinaHighTennis 06-18-2013 06:08 PM

How to get someone to make you their coach?
 
Hey guys,

I coach tennis at this tennis club and there is this girl who I believe I can take her to the next level. I'm her friend and I'd always play matches with her and I have coached players and I believe that I have had success and that I know exactly what she needs to do to become much better. However, I have coached only 1 tournament player and took him to the semifinals of one open tournament.

When I was hitting with her one time, some bystander said, "Are you her coach?"
To this she replied jokingly, "He wishes he can coach a top 75 player"
and I said "I bet I can coach you to become really good". Then she said, "Hmmm, I'll think about it."

What can I do so that she can accept me as a coach? I know I can improve her game and that if I do, the results of her would boost my reputation as a coach.

asusundevils1971 06-18-2013 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarinaHighTennis (Post 7515934)
Hey guys,

I coach tennis at this tennis club and there is this girl who I believe I can take her to the next level. I'm her friend and I'd always play matches with her and I have coached players and I believe that I have had success and that I know exactly what she needs to do to become much better. However, I have coached only 1 tournament player and took him to the semifinals of one open tournament.

When I was hitting with her one time, some bystander said, "Are you her coach?"
To this she replied jokingly, "He wishes he can coach a top 75 player"
and I said "I bet I can coach you to become really good". Then she said, "Hmmm, I'll think about it."

What can I do so that she can accept me as a coach? I know I can improve her game and that if I do, the results of her would boost my reputation as a coach.

I wouldn't want some child with that attitude. If you can improve her game and take her to that next level and more. Talk to her parents and give her a few free lessons and she what her parents think of you. The worse outcome is you have given her some good information and the parents don't keep you on. The best outcome is they keep you as her coach and will see her improve to the next level and more.

r2473 06-18-2013 06:24 PM

Go the Harkleroad route, coach.

MarinaHighTennis 06-18-2013 06:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by asusundevils1971 (Post 7515947)
I wouldn't want some child with that attitude. If you can improve her game and take her to that next level and more. Talk to her parents and give her a few free lessons and she what her parents think of you. The worse outcome is you have given her some good information and the parents don't keep you on. The best outcome is they keep you as her coach and will see her improve to the next level and more.

We are good friends haha I know shes joking but also when I play matches with her I know her mom gets really mad when she loses badly. Every match i go up 5-0 each set then she asks me to gift her a few games so her mom won't get mad... I think this plan backfires on my attempts to want to coach her bc her mom probably thinks I'm not good enough... :(

Maybe I should ask if I can train her for free first and then if there is results, they can pay me?

asusundevils1971 06-18-2013 06:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarinaHighTennis (Post 7515998)
We are good friends haha I know shes joking but also when I play matches with her I know her mom gets really mad when she loses badly. Every match i go up 5-0 each set then she asks me to gift her a few games so her mom won't get mad... I think this plan backfires on my attempts to want to coach her bc her mom probably thinks I'm not good enough... :(

Maybe I should ask if I can train her for free first and then if there is results, they can pay me?

If you are playing matches with her and going up 5-0. Why don't you talk between points and ask why she played the point a certain way. Then play the next point the same way and ask the same question. Then explain again what were you thinking. If you hit with her then you can teach her at the same time. I still ask when hitting with the head pro at my club who is a former Davis Cup player. I am a coach but he still helps me out with my game all the time.

sureshs 06-18-2013 06:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by r2473 (Post 7515956)
Go the Harkleroad route, coach.

Or the Serena-Morataglu (sp?) route

JW10S 06-18-2013 06:59 PM

She doesn't respect you because you are her 'friend' and 'always play matches with her'. She sees you more as a peer. I've found as a coach you can be 'friendly', but once you become their 'friend' you often lose them--or in your case, never get them.

fuzz nation 06-19-2013 09:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarinaHighTennis (Post 7515998)
We are good friends haha I know shes joking but also when I play matches with her I know her mom gets really mad when she loses badly. Every match i go up 5-0 each set then she asks me to gift her a few games so her mom won't get mad... I think this plan backfires on my attempts to want to coach her bc her mom probably thinks I'm not good enough... :(

Maybe I should ask if I can train her for free first and then if there is results, they can pay me?

Hmm... this sounds like a tricky situation. I don't like the sound of her wanting you to let her off the hook and donate a few games to her side of the score sheet during your matches. A couple of possible red-flag interpretations:

1) She's playing to please her mom?
2) She wants to show improvement without earning it.
3) Your friendship may make it more difficult to be a decent coach.

You've already played with this girl, so I wouldn't offer to shift gears and train her for free. If you've demonstrated some proficiency and have something to offer, so be it. I'd prefer to respected enough in a coaching capacity to be compensated for my time and effort. With kids of my friends, I've done a freebie or two, but I try to keep that to a minimum.

I've coached a few different kids over the years with different ambitions as tennis players. A couple of them had a little too much of a fair weather work ethic to really bear down and get better. In those cases, I suppose a coach can only do so much. Recognizing this early on can save anyone from a lot of frustration down the road.

I've also had the good fortune of coaching a state champ through her entire high school run and she's gone on to play in college. Different kettle of fish entirely with this one. While the fair weather kids might ask for things like the game donations, this slugger decided all on her own to put in the work - she was serious. I just had to contribute all the insight and energy toward her cause that I could muster. Otherwise, I just had to keep up!

If you become her coach, make sure that both of you are serious about your roles. You're going to need to communicate on those necessary frequencies that can include the constructive criticism she'll need to help with her development. As for your "sales pitch", you ought to be able to summarize the strengths and weaknesses of her game along with highlights of your plan to develop her inside of maybe a minute.

Keep us posted, amigo. Good Luck!!!

tennis_balla 06-19-2013 12:01 PM

Friend zoned

newpball 06-19-2013 12:06 PM

It is really simple: simply offer your service and then she may say yes or no. :)

However you say you are her friend. OK, fine, but if that means more than acquaintance or you perhaps want it to be more than that then no being her coach is not a good idea in my opinion.

sureshs 06-19-2013 12:09 PM

What is the age difference between coach and coachee (new word) here?

DavaiMarat 06-19-2013 12:20 PM

If you coach her you'll probably complicate your relationship. Somethings should just be left as is. Find another promising junior and go from there. If I'm reading this correctly you want to help her partly because she's your friend and partly cause you think it will help you status wise.

Train someone else. If she see you having success then maybe she'll come to you. Never train anyone who thinks that they are doing you a favor.

You got to play a little more 'hard to get'. It's your 1st step in understanding women.

Either way though, if you coach her you'll probably lose her as friend. Might not be worth it.

LeeD 06-19-2013 12:51 PM

Sometimes I run into "phenoms" I would like to coach.
Today, after a drive by on the local courts...crowded, arguments, youth league, and instructors vying for 6 courts, I drove to the old courts up the hill.
There, old ladies tennis, 2 courts.
On the wall were two ladies hitting one ball to each other.
I find out one of them had NEVER touched a tennis racket, while the other hadn't played tennis in 20 years, and never played more than a handful of days.
The third court opens up, so she the one who never played asks if I would hit a few with her. Her sister rotated in to one of the doubles sets.
I show this lady a forehand grip...she hit flat backhands perfectly against the wall, but only mishit all her forehands...and proceed to rally from the baseline, after I told her where to stand.
She hit at least 20 balls back, one bouncers, while I stood 3' behind my baseline.
After 10 minutes of rallying, she was getting tired, so I asked her to hit a few serves. Naturally, all mishits, no throwing motion, girl motion. So I get her to try a more conti grip, not full conti, but forehand side of conti, and within 5 serves, could get them to bounce 24" high on the backboard, most out of course. Set her feet back of baseline by 18", she'd step forwards with her front foot, and now her serves are POPPING close to in, easy 90 mph, almost like my flat firsts.
SHE DIDN'T know she had to hit second serves slower than her first, had never stepped on court before! The 11 ladies on the two courts wouldn't allow her to play, because she was a total beginner. They were 2.5-3.0 women.
Sounds fishy, except she and her sister played women's pro volleyball for over 15 years. I didn't know they had a women's pro volleyball league.

MarinaHighTennis 06-19-2013 04:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sureshs (Post 7517666)
What is the age difference between coach and coachee (new word) here?

I am turning 20 on the 25th of June. She just turned 13 years old

MarinaHighTennis 06-19-2013 04:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeeD (Post 7517741)
Sometimes I run into "phenoms" I would like to coach.

She is not a "phenom", there is huge flaws in her game but I guess she is good for her age?

newpball 06-19-2013 04:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarinaHighTennis (Post 7518184)
I am turning 20 on the 25th of June. She just turned 13 years old

13? To me that changes everything.

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarinaHighTennis (Post 7515934)
What can I do so that she can accept me as a coach?

If you really want to coach her you need to talk to her parents as she is not in any position to decide on these things.

lightthestorm 06-19-2013 05:07 PM

What's her ranking and star on tennisrecruiting?

I'm reading about her mom, glad mine isn't like that. I would be losing interest and getting frustrated about everything I do if my mom or dad got angry at me everytime I lose a match... and believe me, that happens a lot.

PS. IF you want to convince her parents and if you don;t have much of a reputation... some steps:

1. 1 free 30-1 hr session
2. Lower rates (The average in my town is 45-50 an hour, I would go for about 50-60% of that).
3. Show them your accolades and what you have done in your junior career

Those are steps that worked for me at least...

MarinaHighTennis 06-19-2013 06:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lightthestorm (Post 7518215)
What's her ranking and star on tennisrecruiting?

I'm reading about her mom, glad mine isn't like that. I would be losing interest and getting frustrated about everything I do if my mom or dad got angry at me everytime I lose a match... and believe me, that happens a lot.

PS. IF you want to convince her parents and if you don;t have much of a reputation... some steps:

1. 1 free 30-1 hr session
2. Lower rates (The average in my town is 45-50 an hour, I would go for about 50-60% of that).
3. Show them your accolades and what you have done in your junior career

Those are steps that worked for me at least...

@newpball: She is 13 but she acts and looks like a high school student. I thought she was in high school when i first met her.

She is a 4 star recruit

Sounds like a good idea. Like I said before, I coached one of my students to the semifinals of an open tournament. So should I just ask her mom that I would like to coach her?

lightthestorm 06-19-2013 07:02 PM

I teach one 7 yr old and one 9 yr old in my neighborhood. I got the job because I showed them my accolades and how long I'd been playing, and what I could do to help them be better than their peers.

I do this with the kids:

1. I charge 18 dollars an hour. A bargain since my town's average cost (even for public park pro) is 45-50. But before I charge anything, I give them 1-2 free lessons to get adjusted to me, and see if I'm right for them.

2. I always make it a point to be a little more interactive than any other coach in the area. If the kids are playing a local tournament (and I'm not away on my own), I would attend it. It's fun, and for some reason, it boosts their morale.

My own coach does this with his juniors, and all the high schoolers he coach love this fact. They perform better when he's there for some reason.


3. I don't know much about that girl, but I've seen college students in the area coach juniors about 5-6 years younger. I've seen some become friends and refer to one another as hitting partners. I don't know if that would work with that mom though.


But these are just suggestions... it might work, it might not work. If you do get the job, stand out above all coaches by attending their tournaments (this one will work, I guarantee). This will impress the parents and help with the kid's play.

MarinaHighTennis 06-19-2013 08:51 PM

Thanks for the advice! I really appreciate it and the cool thing is that i am attending her match tmr for the sectionals (she asked me to come) so thank you so much! :D


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