Imagine trying to ride a bike by yourself. Wasn't there always someone there to help you? There must be someone you know who can show you how it's done.
What racket are your stringing? What is your racket pattern (mains, crosses, skipped grommet holes, and does it start in head or throat?) What type clamps are you using (fixed or flying.) Do you have a starting clamp?
Oh yes and one more thing have someone hide that awl from you.
Everyone has the right to be stupid... it's just that some people abuse the privilege