A review of TW's 2013 APD Video Review - 3.5 STARS:
TW's latest video review of the 2013 APD leaps onto the bigscreen dripping with all the high concept of a Simpson-Bruckheimer production. Set in the sunny vista and generic white-picketed community of Pleasantville USA meets Desperate Housewives, the action plays out against the stunning backdrop of the verdant rolling foothills of the San Luis Obispo Ranges(?). It makes a welcome change from TW's previous review locale of the TW warehouse court. High concept indeed.
TW's Siobhan lights up the screen. She is a bright new talent whose poise and on-camera magnetism shines as brightly as her porcelain-white Kiwi Pakeha skin in the Central Californian sunshine. Siobhan is destined for greater things and I don't rule out a future for her as a body-double for Kristen Stewa-whatsername-that-Twilight-Chick, albeit with a better forehand. Absent from the ensemble was TW's usual pitch-man, the charismatic Spencer Boller. Fans of Spencer's playtest insights should lobby TW Producers for his return, if only so we can resume our TW drinking game of shots for every time the Spencemeister mentions the word "wheelhouse". As usual, the ever-reliable Chris Edwards cameos as TW's Detective Murtagh to Siobahn's Riggs ("I'm gettin' too old for this s#!7")
The musical score accompanying the review is laid thick with the groovesome yet underwhelming sounds of West Coast RnB, or as West Coast RnB as freeware music you can get. It undersells the potent excitement generated by the release of this new racket. Missing is the adrenaline-filled euphoria and inspirational racket-air-guitar riffs of the previous TW musical accompaniments. If the music was supposed to motivate me to buy this racket, it made me want to go out and buy some low-waisted baggy jeans instead.
VERDICT: A visually appealing spectacle worthy of the price of admission, but missing the punchy impact and gotta-rob-someone excitement of previous reviews.
MAXXply's rating: 3.5 stars (out of 5)
New balls/freshness rating: 70%