Thread: From The Heart
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Old 12-07-2012, 12:17 PM   #56
MarTennis
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Originally Posted by ga tennis View Post
I know i did the same thing. Im still doing it today. I know my daughter isnt ready to compete but im still letting her play tournaments as long as shes doing it right.She doesnt have any technical flaws its just she just doesnt know how to compete yet. Im not worried about wins or losses now even though it drives me crazy to watch her lose to some of these girls she loses to. I SEE THE BIG PICTURE AND WHAT IVE SEEN AND WHAT I KNOW IS THAT WHEN SHES 14 SHE WONT BE LOSING TO ANY OF THESE GIRLS THAT I HAVE SEEN PLAY.The ONLY reason she loses now is that it really doesnt matter to her right now. When it starts or IF it starts to matter GAME OVER!!!!
...does she define her emotions to you after a loss, either immediately or after taking some time for herself?

My kid takes losses hard immediately afterward and as long as I keep my mouth shut. After he takes some time to himself, he tends to define his emotions to me. Mostly, he says he hates to lose, even if he is the underdog (half of his matches in the 12s, he's 10). I dropped him a level, still 12s but not Open. He wins the tourney. No real elation, subdued reaction. I was pleased on both counts. He recognized his level and did not celebrate the mere victory and he was eager to go back up even if it meant more struggle.

Bottomline, emotions are tricky. If she continues to improve with a subdued outlook that could be fantastic. If you detect a disconnect or maybe a connect between her emotional caring and her improvement and performance or lack thereof, then it could be a factor to monitor to avoid burnout. Here is to hoping she finds the love to carry her through the journey.
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