1) Nostradamus has an identity crisis and changes his name to Socrates. He still has a hot girl as his avatar.
2) Dawgie Dawg is outed by the mods and is revealed to be John Isner. This causes him to rethink his tennis career and finally decides to do something other than just serve.
3) UVA dismisses USC before the final and finally takes home the crown.
3a) Brian Boland's hair stops receding.