yeah finding the grip is KEY... to me the grip has to satisfy 2 requirements..
1) allow me to comfortably address the ball with the leading edge, during the take back, the power position, and the first foot or so of the forward swing; this means the heel pad has to be low enough;
2) there must be good support from the bottom of the grip, at least having the top section of the middle and ring fingers solidly support the bottom bevel.. so this means the grip size cannot be too big, and the grip should not be too extreme.
the rest is fairly automatic, you wind up, address the ball with leading edge and then you unwind... I envision the back of my hitting shoulder draws this up and across arc that is slightly tilted forward to 'cover' the ball, and the arm/racket L unit basically follows the same arc, but at a larger radius...
the initial 'up' part will put the pressure on the middle/ring fingers so the head will start the windshield wiping action.