What? Don't go after the woman? Look, it's 8.0 doubles. If the woman is truly a 4.0 and should be playing at that level, then she should be able to handle the net. I've played with plenty of women who are convincing 4.0 or better players and they usually have no issues with pace at the net. One is so good at the net that after a few games of putting away hard volleys, the guys end up avoiding her. lol
Bottom line is this. Play the point as you would any other doubles point. If you have a winner down the line by a girl, take it. If someone gets pinged, apologize and move on. Don't hound on the girls, but also don't avoid them because you don't want to hit them. I've seen a ton of women who play mixed and get avoided and don't end up hitting that many balls and come out of the match ****ed that they pretty much could have not even been there and it wouldn't have mattered. Everyone is there to play. Make them play the points out.