I am a guy and play mixed in winter and summer leagues. About 4.0-4.5 level (A-3 in ALTA).
I attack every 2nd serve from the woman unless she has a very good 2nd serve. Either hit it firm and deep and come in or slice it short and wide with some bite and come in.
Play the woman, play the woman, and play the woman. Opponents hit good ball while you are back - lob over the woman. Opponents both come in but you have shot at the pass, hit a dipping topspin pass to the woman. Both opponents back, hit aggressive shot to woman. I only hit to the man, if I am in a defensive position and he is back - say he hits a good serve or ground stroke and his female partner is at net, then I go back to the man.
Women don't like slice or kick serves. They don't see them very often and frequently will block harder serves back but really struggle with spinners.