When I was on the mens 4.5 tour my agent would sit in the stands and listen to what others would say about me. Some would mock my mental instabilities. Others would prognosticate on my eventual rise to 4.5 GOAThood.
My favorites were:
1. He's as cool as ice - like Borg
2. He's a basket case
3. He just broke the new Sampras 88 racquet on the net post.
4. That guy is not a 3.5
5. He's wearing Nike - he must be solid.
6. He's a head case
7. He will never be a rising 5.0
8. He has a Sampras 6 pack GOAT bag
9. If you call out close balls he will scream and wig out and surely lose
10. He has spider veins on his cankles - I wonder if he's anemic
There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. A mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live and too rare to die.