How Not To Handle Not Being Invited - Page 2

floridatennisdude · 12-01-2012, 06:40 AM

This is the "me first" generation

It fights teachers for their kids grade, parks its mini van in spots marked compact, sues a business when it trips over Caution tape, sits at an AYCE buffet for lunch and dinner, etc. In a nutshell, there are no rules of etiquette. There are only wants.

tennis tom · 12-01-2012, 07:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cindysphinx

By the same token, the host and other guests did not discuss the event in your presence to avoid rudeness and awkwardness.

Yup.......

Cindysphinx · 12-01-2012, 07:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NumbersGuy

If that were the root cause then I would think we would see the men doing the same thing, but we don't seem to be seeing that.

What do guys do, anyway? If one guy has his buddies over to watch the game, do the ones who weren't invited ever learn about it or care?

wrxinsc · 12-01-2012, 08:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sureshs

Cindy wields too much power.

opposite really. cindy needs teh more powers.

wrxinsc · 12-01-2012, 08:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cindysphinx

I think something else is going on.

Back in the day, etiquette had certain rules about invitations to events. If you realized you were not invited to something, you pretended this didn't bother you. You would never approach the host and ask why you weren't invited. Rude and awkward. By the same token, the host and other guests did not discuss the event in your presence to avoid rudeness and awkwardness.

Now we live in a time when it is OK to confront people, to get things off your chest, to be open, to assert your rights, to get closure. That leads people to ask why they weren't invited -- to weddings, to parties, to tennis teams.

It would be nice if folks could go back to just assuming that they cannot be invited to everything in life and accepting it.

YES

emilyhex · 12-01-2012, 08:45 AM

The solution is simple: choose not to captain a team and be relieved of all the headaches. Let someone else deal with it.

travlerajm · 12-01-2012, 09:26 AM

Easy solution.

If someone asks you to be on the team, you can tell her:
"I have a lot of strong ladies on the team, so I can't guarantee that you would get a chance to play any matches." If she still want to join your team under that circumstance, then let her sign up, since obviously it's not about the tennis for her - it's about her need to feel included.

If someone whines about not being invited, tell her:
"I have a lot of strong ladies on the team, and I didn't think it would be fair to you to invite you if it was unlikely that you'd get a chance to play a match."

The only way these exchanges might become awkward would be if the player had an overly inflated view of her own skill level.

dizzlmcwizzl · 12-01-2012, 10:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cindysphinx

What do guys do, anyway? If one guy has his buddies over to watch the game, do the ones who weren't invited ever learn about it or care?

We are so self centered that even when we are told there was a party that we missed, we ignore them because it did not pertain to us.

dizzlmcwizzl · 12-01-2012, 10:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by travlerajm

The only way these exchanges might become awkward would be if the player had an overly inflated view of her own skill level.

that never happens ...

JoelDali · 12-01-2012, 10:21 AM

Several 3.5 GOATs in my section were forsaken for a multitude of low-end 4.0s with defensive slice backhands.

Epic League shenanigans.

Maui19 · 12-01-2012, 10:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cindysphinx

What do guys do, anyway? If one guy has his buddies over to watch the game, do the ones who weren't invited ever learn about it or care?

Only the metrosexuals.

Maui19 · 12-01-2012, 10:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dcdoorknob

So, I noticed you didn't ask for my opinion on this topic.

Fine. Whatever.

LOL Nicely done.

NumbersGuy · 12-02-2012, 03:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cindysphinx

What do guys do, anyway? If one guy has his buddies over to watch the game, do the ones who weren't invited ever learn about it or care?

I think guys tend to treat social occasions and competitive sports teams differently. If we didn't get invited to watch the football, yeah, we'd probably get a little hacked. The women seem to treat their sports teams as an extension of social occasion, from what I can tell.

Roforot · 12-02-2012, 03:59 AM

Do unto others...

One day, you may be the one left behind.

Cindysphinx · 12-02-2012, 05:52 AM

I have been left behind. I have tried to get on an 8.5 team. No luck. I am not hurt.

The solution is to improve.

JoelDali · 12-02-2012, 07:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cindysphinx

I have been left behind. I have tried to get on an 8.5 team. No luck. I am not hurt.

The solution is to improve.

The next step is to turn off your Internet connection and prepare for your epic TT Exho YouTube enabled battle video with suresh.

Faith.

Courage.

Honor.

andfor · 12-02-2012, 09:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cindysphinx

I have been left behind. I have tried to get on an 8.5 team. No luck. I am not hurt.

The solution is to improve.

Win or die trying. Trample those who get in the way. Satisfaction is being the biggest fish in the smallest ocean.

sureshs · 12-02-2012, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JoelDali

The next step is to turn off your Internet connection and prepare for your epic TT Exho YouTube enabled battle video with suresh.

Faith.

Courage.

Honor.

Played for 3 hours today in 74 degrees sun. Singles and doubles. I am ready for Cindy.

Cindysphinx · 12-02-2012, 06:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sureshs

Played for 3 hours today in 74 degrees sun. Singles and doubles. I am ready for Cindy.

74 degrees is too hot for me.

How do people survive heat like that?

JoelDali · 12-02-2012, 07:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sureshs

Played for 3 hours today in 74 degrees sun. Singles and doubles. I am ready for Cindy.

Wield forth thine KPS 88 and ascend into TT GOATHood.

Respect.

Integrity.

Freedom.

12-01-2012, 09:26 AM	#27
travlerajm Hall Of Fame Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 4,042	Easy solution. If someone asks you to be on the team, you can tell her: "I have a lot of strong ladies on the team, so I can't guarantee that you would get a chance to play any matches." If she still want to join your team under that circumstance, then let her sign up, since obviously it's not about the tennis for her - it's about her need to feel included. If someone whines about not being invited, tell her: "I have a lot of strong ladies on the team, and I didn't think it would be fair to you to invite you if it was unlikely that you'd get a chance to play a match." The only way these exchanges might become awkward would be if the player had an overly inflated view of her own skill level. __________________ BLX Blade 98. 13.74oz., 12.55", 370.5 SW. Pre-Stretched Ashaway Kevlar 18g/Zyex Monogut Red 16g, 55 lbs

12-01-2012, 10:21 AM	#30
JoelDali Legend Join Date: Mar 2009 Posts: 8,945	Several 3.5 GOATs in my section were forsaken for a multitude of low-end 4.0s with defensive slice backhands. Epic League shenanigans. __________________ There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. A mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live and too rare to die.

12-02-2012, 05:52 AM	#35
Cindysphinx G.O.A.T. Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 14,078	I have been left behind. I have tried to get on an 8.5 team. No luck. I am not hurt. The solution is to improve. __________________ -- Random Error Generator, Version 4.0 -- Master Moonballer

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