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Old 05-19-2009, 04:31 PM   #1
Liv3 For It
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Losing...doesn't just hearing the word make you upset? Well it does for me.

I started tennis around 1.5 years ago. I am rated by my coach to be a 3.5. I think that is about right. However, I feel like I am, or can do, so much better than a 3.5. I LOVE tennis. I am addicted. I try so hard to get better all the time and yet I still cannot even compete with the best players on my team. (They are probably Division 1 lvl).

Anyways, I heard losing is good for you and that it helps your mentallity. I play doubles and won a lot this year. BUT, EVERY SINGLE HARD MATCH OR OPPONENT WE FACED, WE LOST TO! I just cannot win a single damn match when it really counts. I want to help my team SOOO bad but I just cannot get even a win. Because of that, my team lost today. =( Man I just feel like quitting.

All I want is to get better, catch up to the better players on my team(one of which is 150 in the nation for his age), and help out my team by WINNING.

WHY CANT I WIN! GOD DAMN!

!@!#@$^(#^%(&)&!#(*&)@$@#()(*&^%$#@!
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Old 05-19-2009, 04:49 PM   #2
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That's incredible! I have been playing tennis for 20 years and I am a 3.5. You have been playing for 1.5 years and you are a 3.5.
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Old 05-19-2009, 05:09 PM   #3
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Default you guys too????

you guys are 3.5s???? ME TOO!!!!! we need to start the 3.5 club!!!!!

to op, dude, you might not be playing "true" 3.5s. honestly and personal integrity aren't found in abudance in club tennis. without seeing these ppl play in person, i can't tell you, but i wouldn't be suprised if a large number of those guys were sandbaggers.

do you find yourself getting all bunged up in matches? if the answer is yes that could be alot of the problem.

i know how you feel, dude. i got beat down this past session of my 3.5 men's league. 0 wins. so maybe you should play me and you might pick up a win. everyone beats me!!!!!!
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Old 05-19-2009, 06:27 PM   #4
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i know how you feel, dude. i got beat down this past session of my 3.5 men's league. 0 wins. so maybe you should play me and you might pick up a win. everyone beats me!!!!!!
Me too... sucks, don't it?
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Old 05-19-2009, 07:09 PM   #5
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Shoot, I've elevated losing to a High Art. I manage to lose in doubles all the time. I've yet to win a set at 4.0 doubles. I have only taken a set off of a 3.5 woman once. Mixed? You gotta be kidding me.

Eh, I'm OK with it. Tennis is fun, even when you lose. Imagine how cool it will be when you start to win a few!
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Old 05-19-2009, 10:47 PM   #6
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If the guys on your team are Div 1 level players a 3.5 would get blown out of the water by them...

3.5 after 1 year is pretty fast...I played for 10 years and made it to 4.5 but after 5 years out I am playing at a 3.0 level and getting beat pretty often which is really tough.
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Old 05-20-2009, 03:21 AM   #7
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I get the impression he plays HS tennis, not USTA league tennis.
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Old 05-20-2009, 05:19 AM   #8
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yeah, HS tennis. Im 3.5 because I play tennis like crazy
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Old 05-20-2009, 05:54 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Liv3 For It View Post
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Losing...doesn't just hearing the word make you upset? Well it does for me.

I started tennis around 1.5 years ago. I am rated by my coach to be a 3.5. I think that is about right. However, I feel like I am, or can do, so much better than a 3.5. I LOVE tennis. I am addicted. I try so hard to get better all the time and yet I still cannot even compete with the best players on my team. (They are probably Division 1 lvl).

Anyways, I heard losing is good for you and that it helps your mentallity. I play doubles and won a lot this year. BUT, EVERY SINGLE HARD MATCH OR OPPONENT WE FACED, WE LOST TO! I just cannot win a single damn match when it really counts. I want to help my team SOOO bad but I just cannot get even a win. Because of that, my team lost today. =( Man I just feel like quitting.

All I want is to get better, catch up to the better players on my team(one of which is 150 in the nation for his age), and help out my team by WINNING.

WHY CANT I WIN! GOD DAMN!

!@!#@$^(#^%(&)&!#(*&)@$@#()(*&^%$#@!
Well, I wouldn't blame God on this, but I would like to offer some help if you're ok with that. I've started a post in the "Adult League & Tournament Talk" and your and my post are almost the exact same. Here is the link: http://tt.tennis-warehouse.com/showthread.php?t=260753

I believe this book will help you. I believe in it very much as it has helped me DRAMATICALLY! It's not that you're a loser or that there's Sandbaggers at every corner (although, there is a chance that this is the case)...it's that you're losing before the match even begins. Please read my post and make some comments. I'm saying it's working for me and I'm so enthused about playing again that it's making my wife sick (or jealous)...lol! Let me know how it goes!

I hope I'm not hyjacking this thread. Those aren't my intentions. I simply have a post that addresses these issues through and through, and I've posted a lot of experiences in which this particular book has helped me.
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Old 05-20-2009, 06:04 AM   #10
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This post could have been written by me about 3 years ago. Things that helped me were to,

1) achieve what I wanted to achieve in other areas of life (professionally, personally), so I wasn't on the tennis court trying to validate my existence

2) play lots of doubles matches. I had the fitness, the strokes, the determination, the gear, the know-how, the strategy, but I was very inexperienced in competition. Doubles was perfect for getting match experience without bearing all the pressure. Also helped with consistency, volleys, and shot selection.

3) Bigger, lighter frame. I had to admit I wasn't Federer and had no business using a Tour 90, nor was I James Blake and had limitations with my Dunlop 200g (98 sq in). Now I'm at 100 sq. inches, an ounce or two lighter, and loving it. Also continued to work on my strokes, changed my grip, hitting less flat for more margin of error.

Good luck.
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Old 05-20-2009, 06:50 AM   #11
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Why or why is this the same post as the one called "Losing..." in the "Tips and Instruction" place?
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Old 05-20-2009, 06:54 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Liv3 For It View Post
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Losing...doesn't just hearing the word make you upset? Well it does for me.

WHY CANT I WIN! GOD DAMN!

!@!#@$^(#^%(&)&!#(*&)@$@#()(*&^%$#@!
Ah the youth!

Please concentrate on getting all the basics right in your strokes, in your footwork, in your focus etc. If you get everything right in your muscle memory at this point, it will help you a lot for the rest of your life, results wise and fitness wise. Ask your coach what you are doing wrong, ask your coach to attend your matches and ask what you are doing wrong. And work on that.

Maybe your game is such that it needs to be perfected for results to show. e.g. you may have an aggressive game and since it is not perfect, you are losing against some pushers. Once those shots start getting in consistently, results will be different. It is very difficult to have consistent strokes in 1.5 years. But time is on your side.

There is one pro player who did not win much until he was 22 or so.
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Old 05-20-2009, 07:00 AM   #13
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The hardest thing to get in tennis is experience. I just started playing tennis last spring, and I have improved a bunch. But I still lose a lot, because there comes a point when, even if I can go shot for shot with some of the better people on my team, they have more experience and coaching to know how to close out points better.

In a year's time, I've gone from spraying shots all over the court and not having a serve worth talking about to having a pretty good forehand and a darn good serve. But for all this, I still can't quite win matches. It'll come in time, though.
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Old 05-20-2009, 12:14 PM   #14
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this has been stated above, but the best advice is to make sure your strokes are correct... don't compromise yourself and use a poor grip, etc., as you will stagnate at this level. you are young, you have your whole life to improve, and you WILL if you make sure you are on the right path with correct strokes.

then, all you can do is compete, play, drill, etc.

it will come, but there is no cheating (as i have learned)!! incorrect grips/strokes willl only take you so far.

even if you have to take yourself out of competitive play for awhile to refine some things, do it, it is worth it in the long run. as i know how hard it is to do something 'correctly' even if it doesn't immediately get you the results you want...that's why i still serve with a flat eastern grip....FAIL!!!
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Old 05-20-2009, 02:41 PM   #15
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Originally Posted by Liv3 For It View Post
yeah, HS tennis. Im 3.5 because I play tennis like crazy
Just because you play tennis like crazy it makes you a 3.5. If I go by this I will be a 6.0 at least!

I think you just need more exposure to be able to assess a player's skill level. Based on your comments about your top teammates, you probably haven't seen enough players in different skill levels.

If they really are Division I players they better be winning their matches easily unless they are playing Division I quality opponents.
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Old 05-20-2009, 03:41 PM   #16
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i would say play more singles rather than doubles. Singles forces you to think when and why to hit a shot - mentally you have to think about what to hit, when to hit it...which also translate to physical fitness - getting in shape. Also, play tournaments; stay competitive outside of league. Is a steep cost (about $55 here in Norcal per tourney), but you'll learn to stretch your dollar/games or sets.
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Old 05-20-2009, 07:09 PM   #17
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To the original poster:

Tell us about your game, may be we can help.
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Old 05-21-2009, 02:25 AM   #18
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If you have guys on your HS team that are Nationally ranked or D-1 material, then chances are you will never be at their level without undertaking some serious training with a coach. If you are relying on practices with your team and what a HS coach has to offer, that will not be enough. So I wouldn't worry about that if you don't have the resources.

Just focus on beating your opponents at whatever position you are on the team. I'm guessing you should face some opponents similarly skiled to yourself, because I think its a minority of HS players that are real high level.

Are you at least somewhat competitive in your matches? Try to figure out why you are losing. If your strokes break down, then work on drills to groove those strokes and add some consistency. If you are beating yourself by overhitting, then work on shot selection drills. You gotta figure out where you are, and start practicing the things that are letting you down first.
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Old 05-21-2009, 06:32 AM   #19
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^Good advice by raiden031!
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Old 05-21-2009, 01:44 PM   #20
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If you have guys on your HS team that are Nationally ranked or D-1 material, then chances are you will never be at their level without undertaking some serious training with a coach. If you are relying on practices with your team and what a HS coach has to offer, that will not be enough. So I wouldn't worry about that if you don't have the resources.

Just focus on beating your opponents at whatever position you are on the team. I'm guessing you should face some opponents similarly skiled to yourself, because I think its a minority of HS players that are real high level.

Are you at least somewhat competitive in your matches? Try to figure out why you are losing. If your strokes break down, then work on drills to groove those strokes and add some consistency. If you are beating yourself by overhitting, then work on shot selection drills. You gotta figure out where you are, and start practicing the things that are letting you down first.
Yeah, they are nationally ranked. But still, I had taken A LOT of lessons and play tennis daily with a few friends. I just feel like I could be a lot better. I dont think I can beat those players, but I want to be able to compete with them. OR at least take 3-4 games off them, BUT I CANT EVEN DO THAT.

I try so hard. and still cant do ****. When my team needs my win the most, I lose it and lose for the team(happened yesterday).

I am competeitive but when pressure comes to me, I start to break down. For example, it was 4-5 and everyone held serve. My serve now, I lose it. My strokes break down and I miss and I dont know why.
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