How should friends handle this?

[dParis]

Originally Posted by hb_hound

It is a gender thing, watching four women trying to split a check at lunch, for example, is quite comical. There are detailed discussions on who ate what and how the appetizers should be split. Men on the other hand just throw money in a pile on the table and the waitress usually makes out rather well on the tip.

Tru 'dat.

Originally Posted by Cindysphinx

I'm wondering how you folks would handle this situation.

Four friends (Amy, Bea, Cathy and Dora) are taking a five-day vacation. Bea, Cathy and Dora will be traveling on the same itinerary -- same flights. This means they will share a cab to the hotel, at a total cost of $60 one way.

Amy is going to make it a longer vacation to visit family in the area. She will fly separately both ways and will rent a car to get around. She will meet up with the others for the hotel portion of the vacation. Once she meets the others, there will be no need for anyone to have a car -- it will be parked (for free) at the hotel.

Here's the question: If Amy gives Bea, Cathy and Dora a ride from the hotel back to the airport (thereby saving them $60), should Amy receive $60 from the others? If they do not offer, should she ask? Should Amy just consider it a favor and let it go? Is there a better/different solution?

Therapy?

[mucat]

Originally Posted by LameTennisPlayer

I suggest a mud wrestle... the winner is void of paying, the rest have to do splits.

Corrected.

[SirGounder]

Originally Posted by hb_hound

It is a gender thing, watching four women trying to split a check at lunch, for example, is quite comical. There are detailed discussions on who ate what and how the appetizers should be split. Men on the other hand just throw money in a pile on the table and the waitress usually makes out rather well on the tip.
I am curious to see the outcome.

Lol I was thinking the exact same thing. When we go out, the girls break out their cell phones to calculate tip. The guys round up to the nearest $5-10 and leave. Thus, the wait staff makes off with a 25 to 30% tip.

I say since the airport is in the general direction of where Amy is going, she should just do her friends a favor. Her friends should offer to buy her lunch, give her some money etc in return but are not obligated to do so. When I go out with friends, we'll spot each other all the time with the understanding that the other guy has it next time. It all evens out, either that or I'm getting the shaft.

[JoelDali]

Dora sounds hot.

Does she have that Facebook stuff so we can check out the giblets?

[Fandango]

just see it as a favor and nothing much.

[Ken Honecker]

As a guy, and this is totally a gender thing, I'd be willing to spend a half hour and $3 worth of gas to help my friends out without expecting anything in return. If the person with the car isn't comfortable with this or doesn't want to anger anyone by asking for money then all they have to do is schedule their day so it isn't possible for them to act as a taxi.

As one of the passengers I'd say thanks but it would never come to mind to offer a friend money for such a simple favor.

One of my online friends talks on occasion about 3AM Mates who are those you can call in the middle of the night to pick you up if the old lady tosses you out or bail you out of jail if things didn't go quite as planned. In either scenario I don't think tipping is required.

[hb_hound]

Originally Posted by Ken Honecker

One of my online friends talks on occasion about 3AM Mates who are those you can call in the middle of the night to pick you up if the old lady tosses you out or bail you out of jail if things didn't go quite as planned. In either scenario I don't think tipping is required.

Reminds me of this

Friendship among Women:
A woman didn't come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it.


Friendship among Men:
A man didn't come home one night. The next morning he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house. The woman called her husband's 10 best friends. Eight confirmed that he had slept over, and two said he was still there.

[Pidgeon]

sheesh i thought this was a tennis related forum

[rommil]

Originally Posted by Cindysphinx

Here's the question: If Amy gives Bea, Cathy and Dora a ride from the hotel back to the airport (thereby saving them $60), should Amy receive $60 from the others? If they do not offer, should she ask? Should Amy just consider it a favor and let it go? Is there a better/different solution?

How did they arrive at the gives a ride part? If Amy offered, then Amy shouldnt bring it up and just consider it a favor. If the girls asked her to drive them then they should offer some money to Amy, if they don't then Amy should just consider it an favor and let it go.
Geesh........if not they should just find themselves less cheap friends to vacation with next time.

[crystal_clear]

I think three friends need to respect whatever Amy's decision is and not feeling offended. It will be nice to offer Amy money or a nice dinner and it is up to Amy if she wants to take it or not. Paying $60 is like doing strict business so paying $30 is more appropriate. Some appreciation would encourage people to provide help in the future. A win/win situation is ideal to maintain a healthy relationship.

Amy spent gas and at least one hour of time to pick up friends.

BTW, Cindy is not Amy.

[Cindysphinx]

Originally Posted by crystal_clear

BTW, Cindy is not Amy.

Interesting.

What makes you say that?

Originally Posted by Cindysphinx

I'm wondering how you folks would handle this situation.

Four friends (Amy, Bea, Cathy and Dora) are taking a five-day vacation. Bea, Cathy and Dora will be traveling on the same itinerary -- same flights. This means they will share a cab to the hotel, at a total cost of $60 one way.

Amy is going to make it a longer vacation to visit family in the area. She will fly separately both ways and will rent a car to get around. She will meet up with the others for the hotel portion of the vacation. Once she meets the others, there will be no need for anyone to have a car -- it will be parked (for free) at the hotel.

Here's the question: If Amy gives Bea, Cathy and Dora a ride from the hotel back to the airport (thereby saving them $60), should Amy receive $60 from the others? If they do not offer, should she ask? Should Amy just consider it a favor and let it go? Is there a better/different solution?

Cindy, this is a dilemma only in the US, the rest of the world would tell you: if these are your FRIENDS, then you do everything for them. A ride to the airport is nothing.

[Polaris]

Originally Posted by eliza

Cindy, this is a dilemma only in the US, the rest of the world would tell you: if these are your FRIENDS, then you do everything for them. A ride to the airport is nothing.

This, exactly.

[sureshs]

Originally Posted by eliza

Cindy, this is a dilemma only in the US, the rest of the world would tell you: if these are your FRIENDS, then you do everything for them. A ride to the airport is nothing.

Yeah but the rest of the world does not operate on tight schedules. Everyone in the US is busy.

[Bud]

Originally Posted by Cindysphinx

I'm wondering how you folks would handle this situation.

Four friends (Amy, Bea, Cathy and Dora) are taking a five-day vacation. Bea, Cathy and Dora will be traveling on the same itinerary -- same flights. This means they will share a cab to the hotel, at a total cost of $60 one way.

Amy is going to make it a longer vacation to visit family in the area. She will fly separately both ways and will rent a car to get around. She will meet up with the others for the hotel portion of the vacation. Once she meets the others, there will be no need for anyone to have a car -- it will be parked (for free) at the hotel.

Here's the question: If Amy gives Bea, Cathy and Dora a ride from the hotel back to the airport (thereby saving them $60), should Amy receive $60 from the others? If they do not offer, should she ask? Should Amy just consider it a favor and let it go? Is there a better/different solution?

Any real friend would not charge for this. Just ask her if she'd mind picking you up at the airport. If she can and does then, buy her dinner one night at a decent restaurant

You could also volunteer some gas money since the airport is some distance away.

[MegacedU]

She should consider it a favor and let it go. Send a thank you and a bottle of wine.

Originally Posted by sureshs

Yeah but the rest of the world does not operate on tight schedules. Everyone in the US is busy.

Gosh you are right, in Italy they stop, take the checkered tablecloth and the Chianti and spent 4 hours for lunch every day... I must have been the only idiot throwing a sandwich at noon and running...........
Why do you think only the US has tight schedules? Next time I go to Europe I will bring you along, to see how normal people lives are....Not a postcard or stupid movies.........

[LameTennisPlayer]

Originally Posted by JoelDali

Dora sounds hot.

Does she have that Facebook stuff so we can check out the giblets?

mmmhmmmm


nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom

[RD 7]

Cindy,

Don't say a word. Give them a chance to do the right thing.

Your job is to stay classy.

However,

(listen to me very carefully)

if these selfish mother f'ers don't do the right thing, than you should take action.



Don't get emotional.

Just take care of business and move on.

[Cindysphinx]

OK, here's the reveal. I am not Amy.

I'm not Dora either, because Dora is hot.

I'm just one of the three who aren't renting the car. This little dilemma occurred to me because I know Amy. Amy is somewhat cash strapped due to the current economy. I do not mean she is homeless. I mean she feels she needs to pinch pennies to stay on top of the mortgage and kid's college tuition.

This has led Amy in the past to complain about small expenses. Like, we were at a team practice indoors, so everyone had to pay. We were in the middle of a game when the horn blew. As no one needed the court after us, the players decided to try to finish their game. Amy protested, saying that if the club charged us for the full hour she wasn't going to pay. That sort of thing.

Anyway, my thought was that Amy might well feel that we should help offset the rental car cost, and I was wondering about a way to head off any potential awkwardness. There are many options -- I could just raise it with the other three and then make an offer to Amy. I'd rather help a friend pay for a rental car than give it to a cabbie. But now you are all suggesting that payment would be inappropriate, which kind of surprised me.

See, I see this situation as a little different because it is a rental car. It seems obvious to me that if a pal needs a ride to the airport and you own a car, you just drive them to the airport for free. When there is a determined expense for the rental car as well as a defined cap expense, it starts to feel different to me.

Further complicating matters is that the event we will be attending is a sporting event. There will be no expensive dinners (which would be the ideal way to reciprocate). It's more everyone buying a burger and fries at the stadium for lunch and dinner daily.

The trip is in a few months. I'll let you know how it goes.