Should You Shake Hands With An Opponent That Cheated?

PimpMyGame

Hall of Fame
I always shake hands because there is no need to sink to their level.

I never smile or talk to them though!
 

Fedace

Banned
Well, i had experience with this just last weekend. It was in the playoff match. There were 2 really bad calls in the 3rd set tiebreaker nontheless. 1 on the topspin passing shot that my opponents let go cause they thought were going out and it landed on the baseline. and the other on the up the middle serve that was an Ace that they called out. We ended up winning the tiebreaker despite all this crazyness. but had we lost, probably we would have been much more upset. but i still would have shaken their hand,,, just cause it is the right thing to do.
but i also understood that this was the Playoffs and guys want to win very badly and badcalls can happen. Maybe they thought 2 very close linecalls that i made earlier in the set was In ??? I clearly saw them long cause i was standing right on the baseline but maybe from their perspective it looked in to them ? so my point is bad calls do happen.
 

Fedace

Banned
Also since this is the star trek summer. Always remember the vision of Gene Roddenberry. IN that One Man can make a difference in this world. Just cause so many guys cheat, it doesn't mean you have to sink to that level. ONE man can do the right thing and can make a difference in this world.
 

heninfan99

Talk Tennis Guru
I think The Count of Monte Cristo was as good as Star Trek. :)

Also since this is the star trek summer. Always remember the vision of Gene Roddenberry. IN that One Man can make a difference in this world. Just cause so many guys cheat, it doesn't mean you have to sink to that level. ONE man can do the right thing and can make a difference in this world.
 

Fedace

Banned
"it's the right thing to do" is just not enough for me. I think The Count of Monte Cristo was as good as Star Trek. :)

OK, in that case, make sure you do the RAFA before you shake hands. Really dig that finger in there to make a good point with your opponents.......lol:)
 

Steady Eddy

Legend
I think that if you didn't shake, YOU would look bad to others, not the opponents. People wouldn't say, "That guy didn't shake, his opponents must have been bad cheats." More likely they'd say, "Look at the guy who wouldn't shake when he lost. What a bad sport." See what I mean?
 

Fedace

Banned
I think that if you didn't shake, YOU would look bad to others, not the opponents. People wouldn't say, "That guy didn't shake, his opponents must have been bad cheats." More likely they'd say, "Look at the guy who wouldn't shake when he lost. What a bad sport." See what I mean?

I do know what you mean but it doesn't matter to me what other people think. What matters to me is that we do the Right thing.
 

goober

Legend
I do know what you mean but it doesn't matter to me what other people think. What matters to me is that we do the Right thing.
hahaha good one...
Almost took you seriously until I remembered that all your posts are suppose to be jokes.
 

Cindysphinx

G.O.A.T.
I think that if you didn't shake, YOU would look bad to others, not the opponents. People wouldn't say, "That guy didn't shake, his opponents must have been bad cheats." More likely they'd say, "Look at the guy who wouldn't shake when he lost. What a bad sport." See what I mean?

Of course you shake hands. That is your opportunity to look this person in the eye and say exactly what you think.

If you have the guts, that is.
 

TonLars

Professional
A couple times, and its rare, ive run into some good players that also cheated me and I still reluctantly gave them a handshake quickly. I also told them what I thought about it. If I play these players again I will insist on an umpire for the match from the beginning or I wont play. One time I did not shake hands however, but it wasnt because of cheating. I wont shake hands with someone that is an absolute jerk to me on the court, and personally insults me or my family. Even one other time I did a quick hand touch with a guy that was like this, but the other time against the monster I did not. I won both matches also so that wasnt a factor in my decision I guess.
 
A couple times, and its rare, ive run into some good players that also cheated me and I still reluctantly gave them a handshake quickly. I also told them what I thought about it. If I play these players again I will insist on an umpire for the match from the beginning or I wont play. One time I did not shake hands however, but it wasnt because of cheating. I wont shake hands with someone that is an absolute jerk to me on the court, and personally insults me or my family. Even one other time I did a quick hand touch with a guy that was like this, but the other time against the monster I did not. I won both matches also so that wasnt a factor in my decision I guess.

Wow, I've never run into anyone that was even remotely insulting towards me personally.
 

MrCLEAN

Rookie
Only once. I was playing a social doubles match, and one of the opponents was a guy that I had teamed up w/ in doubles a few years earlier. We had a bit of a falling out due to some minor stuff (like me telling him to stop trying to serve like Sampras when he was serving for the tournament and missing wildly), he didn't like advice, even when he was costing us the match. In any case, I was serving to stay in the match, and he, very audibly, told his partner "don't worry, he'll choke" and crap like that. I didn't choke, but we did lose the game, and the match. I walked up there and basically told him off about who the choker was, and that him talking like that was BS. A few days later, he called and appologized for what he said. He was hypercompetitive, to a fault. We were cool after that.
 

canadave

Professional
I think the answer to the original question depends. If the person MAYBE cheated, you're not sure, maybe there was a line call here or there....ehh...I think you have to shake hands. Sometimes we think people cheated and we just didn't have a good view of things ourselves. File this under "giving the opponent every benefit of the doubt."

On the other hand, if the guy was calling balls out that were two feet inside the line, all day, and was giving himself extra points during each game, and was being a poor sport to boot.....well, I wouldn't call it a handshake; I'd call it "grabbing the guy's hand so that he doesn't get away and I can tell him exactly what I thought of his f***** antics" :)
 

tennismike33

Semi-Pro
IMO, you may want to substitute another word for cheater. I think that word is inflamatory and can cause negative feelings. A person who misses a line call or two may not be a cheater, might be that they are in the wrong position to make an accurate call. Maybe they are unable to follow the flight of the ball because you hit it so firmly and fast they can't pace your serve correctly, hence the out call cometh. I think that most people are not cheaters, they do not make improper line calls on purpose, it is just that the ball is whizzing so fast and they snap judgement it, occasionally I will slow down and rethink a call and if there is a doubt I will call the ball in, is that cheating too????. I have seen enough 2.5-5.0 matches to see the level of competance calling lines is much lower at lower levels, as my wife being a 2.5 has not the experience to clearly see a ball struck well and hit the line, as many of the balls she sees are shanks and mishits that fall onto the line, how can she EVER call any of them in.

Recently I witnessed a team, when questioned about line calls their standard answer is, "The ball is our call, we made the call and it sticks." Then they turn around and go to the baseline, leaving you standing at net looking for someone to discuss the line call with, interesting tactic, is it cheating too, or just they way they have been taught to avoid conflict on the court and to stick with their calls.
 
T

tennislife22

Guest
you always shake the guys hand, like people have said it makes you look bad if you don't. And besides, your honoring the game by doing it. Regardless of how bad someone cheated, screamed, etc. its still a game and they are the ones who will have to live with themselves. I didn't shake a guys hand once and have regretted it ever since. I felt like the bad guy and still haven't forgiven myself, even though he was the jerk.
 

bjk

Hall of Fame
Do you pay a tip for bad service? What's the point of a tip then? Same for shaking hands. If somebody just mugged you, would you say "have a nice day"?
 

West Coast Ace

G.O.A.T.
IMO, you may want to substitute another word for cheater. I think that word is inflamatory and can cause negative feelings. A person who misses a line call or two may not be a cheater, might be that they are in the wrong position to make an accurate call.
Mike, then he/she is still a cheater. The rule is clear: if you do not see the ball clearly out then you have to call it in. Period. Anything else is cheating.
 

JavierLW

Hall of Fame
I have a hard time shaking hands with a cheater. What do you guys do?

Ive only played one person in league tennis who I really think blatantly cheated on purpose and I wish I wouldn't of shook his hand. (he was calling balls out that were several feet in, and some that were still flying thru the air that eventually landed in)

But face it, most people are really just subconsciously cheating, they are not out to purposely screw you. (the "wishful calling" sort)

Maybe you can say they should know better because "YOU WOULDNT DO THAT", or whatever but you dont need to have any malice toward them. I just figure it's something they cant control, just like dealing with anyone who has some sort of mental handicap.

So Id shake their hand, the match is over at that point.

What's the purpose of not shaking their hand? To teach them a lesson? (not happening....) Because you want to show you are "mad" at them? (what's the point?)

It's a silly meaningless gesture, they've won the match already, just be glad they didnt sneak into your tennis bag when you werent looking and make off with your wallet or something.
 
J

Julieta

Guest
I've always gone through with the hand shake ritual because that's just what you do. I wish we lived in some kind of utopian world where people dont cheat but unfortunately that is not the case.
 
J

Julieta

Guest
But face it, most people are really just subconsciously cheating, they are not out to purposely screw you. (the "wishful calling" sort)

.

I agree with all of your points. If it is a call here and there, then yes, its just the wishful thinker or someone who makes an honest mistake. Passing shots and serves down the middle seem to be the frequent areas where seemingly honest people make bad calls. That said, I have met some world class cheaters who definitely had a full on cheating agenda! They hook at certain times and dont even really care where the ball lands if they want the point. The other type tries to accuse you of making a against them to get things started. Or mess up the score. Some people do it all! Then there is the "if its close its out" (see NCAAs on TV for this one in action) group. I've even known of cheating of the well organized level such as with draws and match scheduling, officials getting involved, etc.. but this is usually when cash is on the line.
 

JavierLW

Hall of Fame
I agree with all of your points. If it is a call here and there, then yes, its just the wishful thinker or someone who makes an honest mistake. Passing shots and serves down the middle seem to be the frequent areas where seemingly honest people make bad calls. That said, I have met some world class cheaters who definitely had a full on cheating agenda! They hook at certain times and dont even really care where the ball lands if they want the point. The other type tries to accuse you of making a against them to get things started. Or mess up the score. Some people do it all! Then there is the "if its close its out" (see NCAAs on TV for this one in action) group. I've even known of cheating of the well organized level such as with draws and match scheduling, officials getting involved, etc.. but this is usually when cash is on the line.

Right, Id have to admit that when Im making my comments Im mainly thinking about league tennis or situations for adults where we end up playing someone like that.

At some of our levels (3.5 Men's or 3.5 Women for instance) where all you get is your name in the "left hand column" on the computer and maybe a shot at winning a pen, it's just plain ******** for someone to go out of their way to cheat.

They probably have a few screws lose and are not playing with a full deck in most cases and you have to wonder what their motivation even is for playing. (maybe they ran out of pens and water bottles at home.....)
 
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JavierLW

Hall of Fame
Recently I witnessed a team, when questioned about line calls their standard answer is, "The ball is our call, we made the call and it sticks." Then they turn around and go to the baseline, leaving you standing at net looking for someone to discuss the line call with, interesting tactic, is it cheating too, or just they way they have been taught to avoid conflict on the court and to stick with their calls.

That's not even close to cheating, not sure what your point is.

I do the same thing when people question my line calls.

They are allowed to ask me but if I confirm my call they are to move on, there is no need for me to stand around the net discussing it with them or listening to them complain.

(about something THEY saw versus something I saw)

If it takes more then 3 seconds to settle that dispute there had better be some sort of challenge system otherwise it's a huge waste of time.
 

jc4.0

Professional
be classy

I always shake hands with my opponent(s) and say "well played". That is the classy thing to do always. But if I'm sure they hooked me, I never play with them again. Then I get on with my life...
 

heninfan99

Talk Tennis Guru
No, not shaking wouldn't be to teach them a lesson. It would be out of not wanting to shake the hand of someone that just robbed you. I don't like shaking the hand of an a##hole. Just me, I guess.

The worst is people that cheat only on important points. Those are game changers.

Ive only played one person in league tennis who I really think blatantly cheated on purpose and I wish I wouldn't of shook his hand. (he was calling balls out that were several feet in, and some that were still flying thru the air that eventually landed in)

But face it, most people are really just subconsciously cheating, they are not out to purposely screw you. (the "wishful calling" sort)

Maybe you can say they should know better because "YOU WOULDNT DO THAT", or whatever but you dont need to have any malice toward them. I just figure it's something they cant control, just like dealing with anyone who has some sort of mental handicap.

So Id shake their hand, the match is over at that point.

What's the purpose of not shaking their hand? To teach them a lesson? (not happening....) Because you want to show you are "mad" at them? (what's the point?)

It's a silly meaningless gesture, they've won the match already, just be glad they didnt sneak into your tennis bag when you werent looking and make off with your wallet or something.
 
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NE14Tennis?

New User
I would ALWAYS shake hands at the end of a match, especially if I couldn't conclude beyond the shadow of a doubt that he/she/they had intentionally made bad calls. Some people just aren't that accurate with calls, but we never complain unless they go against us.
I did however, reach into my wallet once before shaking the hand of a particulary egregious bad-caller and pressed my optometrist's card into his hand as I shook it. He got the message.
 

plasma

Banned
grover, you haven't played lots of tourneys if you haven't run into this type. Tennis can be lost on the momentum of a point or two. Those are the points where cheaters thrive and play their con. Life is about being the bigger man. Ton Lars expressed it perfectly. In the end it's just tennis.
Assuming we're not talking about a tournament, but rather a pick up game at the park or a match at a club:
If you let yourself get too upset, then just like in life, you've lost face. It's just a game, for you it's a game of skill, for the cheater, it's a game of ******* off the skilled player so they can't even enjoy a win.

Expect this, stay chipper; tell them what cheats and loosers they are after you shake their, if you like . I worked as a head doorman and bouncer for many years. I also did a bit of boxing, guess I don't feel it personally, but a handshake is a big deal to some. Do you really want to alienate someone in your community if they cheat in a club pick up match? just accept them and pity them, with that unflappable cool you win, in life or tennis....
29l1pjk.jpg

cheaters are trying to elicit an emotional response...be Joe Cool, beat them with Zen, non-action and wisdom. I used to let cheaters beat me. Once I became Joe Cool they started to break down on court. Be sure to tell them that they need lessons after the match, they are sure to say they lost due to their poor performance. Tell them that perhaps their lack of good sportsmanship cursed them and that you'll beat them next time and every time until they learn to respect their fellow competitiors...it's not arrogant, just answering their absurd lies with blatant honesty. I have done this. It feels great...total revenge and feels better than the reaction THEY want
 

Steady Eddy

Legend
Tell them that perhaps their lack of good sportsmanship cursed them
At the risk of sounding insane, I think this somehow works in tennis. I've seen cheaters go on to hit net cords that roll serveral feet on the net and then...fall on their own side. The luck just doesn't seem to be with them. A sudden wind will push their lob out, things like that happen. I get the feeling that they've angered the tennis gods, and they'll be cursed until they start to play more honestly. It's spooky. :shock:
 
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