even top-notch sports psychologists get stressed out when watching their kids play! read Dr. Allen Fox's confessions and see if you can relate . . .
http://parentingaces.com/2012/02/02/confessions-of-a-tennis-parent/
I know all these kids work hard and some are very good athletes others are very good tennis players very few are both, BUT they all have very few life experiences and that is where the Parents should fill in the white space.
How do I view my role as a Tennis Parent. Varies by age but for now, I simply eliminate as many variables in competition until she gets old enough to take them on.
For Example my daughters routine for Tournament play last year:
- She'd wake up breakfast ready, bag packed, drinks, towels, outfit layed out ready to go. I'd warm her 30-45 minutes specific routine.
Now - She packs her bag, gets her drinks, picks her snacks, her outfit and what she wants for breakfast. Do you want to warm up on the wall or the court? What shots do you want to hit in warm up besides serve and return?
Parents decide when to pass them task. How much, How little that's what we get paid the big bucks for. We make our $$$$
before a point is played,
and after the match is done.
No false praise, point out the negative always finish on a positive and by the time the car hits the park exit Tennis Talk is done. If you want to talk some more ok back to the park and we talk. Leave it there.
I stress only 2 Tennis related points:
1- Serve and Return account for 66% of every point in a match (G12s avg rally 3 shots). Did you win the Serve and Return game?
2- Be fair to yourself. If you get mad at yourself on mistakes you must find a way to smile on your good points. I'll cheer you on but not if you can't cheer yourself.
My little one is VERY VERY aggressive. So yes it is PAINFULL to watch her go for angle after angle, but that is what she is being taught. If the ball is short the point is over. So she is judges in the context of what her coach has set for her. I then must also temper my reactions based on what she is taught.
I do clap and say Nice Try, or give her Thumbs up on as many misses as winners. She knows I am responding to EFFORT not results.