CanadianChic
Hall of Fame
Another year, another legendary Grand Slam tournament on the sacred land of Flushing Meadows (such a pretty name, no?). Some of the greats are back to flex their muscle and try their with all their athletic might to wrestle the trophy from Federer's death grip, and some new contenders are proving that they have more than just a little game to offer the ever-so-loud crowd. We could discuss the upsets that have occurred, make predictions of the matches to come, or even trip down memory lane with fondness reflecting on the great players of yore.
But WAIT!!!! First, we should recap what the tennis fans really, truly care about - the grit of the game. Stats and ranks be damned!! The fans have spoken and this is what they've had to say (in no particular order):
- Sharapova has gained a bit too much muscle recently and is appearing a tad manly. Not to worry though...there are more than a few young'uns who would still sacrifice themselves, lower their standards if you will, to "tap" that.
- It has been determined that the Djoker just may be gay (not that there is anything wrong with that if he were). Now he is reported to be seeing Drak's sweet Ana (which has him in a bit of a snit...floating around the boards creating mayhem in a jealous whirl)
which brings us to the debate of whose biceps are bigger (Novak or Ana)?
- Of all the wardrobe faux pas of the past this one takes the cake...can you believe that Federer is wearing a shirt that is tight around the tummy? By most normal people's standards it is a regularly fitting shirt, but in comparison to the baggy trend of the last few years, someone caught a glimpse of what could be perceived under certain light, at a certain angle as...*gasp*.. a roll!!! Does this mean Fed is now out of shape? Is he retiring? Well the ********* are all over this like Mirka to a cinnamon roll on Sunday morning.
- Back to Sharapova - that dress has some quite hot and others quite bothered. But the real focal point are the sneakers. Not a wise selection Masha! And can you just believe the commercial she shot? She has just reminded us how smugly arrogant she is which has brought under the spotlight the age old question of whether or not she is as loud in bed as on the courts.
- Roddick's game just plain sucks and no one really has any encouraging words for the towel biter.
- Serena is shrieking like a wild hog at a southern barbecue and her butt is so big it fills the entire television screen. Perhaps that is where Fed's missing Walmart racquet has been hiding?
- Female tennis sucks - nothing really new to the endless whining and moaning on this topic. The female players should have to play five sets like the men, but no one wants them to gain an ounce of muscle as they may take on the above noted "manly" physique. Now that would just be all bad.
- Hot ticket item: Fed didn't know who Althea Gibson is. Can you believe it? And he calls himself a tennis star? Perhaps Dimensia is slowly creeping in or maybe he is missing the "close" relationship with Roache - who knows? If you can't tell us that she was a black female tennis star before the open era then you better not call yourself a Swiss dagnabbit!!
Ahhh...you guys never fail to amuse me. Thanks for the giggles and I look forward to updating this thread with the riveting conversations which I have no doubt will come in the final half of the first week.
But WAIT!!!! First, we should recap what the tennis fans really, truly care about - the grit of the game. Stats and ranks be damned!! The fans have spoken and this is what they've had to say (in no particular order):
- Sharapova has gained a bit too much muscle recently and is appearing a tad manly. Not to worry though...there are more than a few young'uns who would still sacrifice themselves, lower their standards if you will, to "tap" that.
- It has been determined that the Djoker just may be gay (not that there is anything wrong with that if he were). Now he is reported to be seeing Drak's sweet Ana (which has him in a bit of a snit...floating around the boards creating mayhem in a jealous whirl)
which brings us to the debate of whose biceps are bigger (Novak or Ana)?- Of all the wardrobe faux pas of the past this one takes the cake...can you believe that Federer is wearing a shirt that is tight around the tummy? By most normal people's standards it is a regularly fitting shirt, but in comparison to the baggy trend of the last few years, someone caught a glimpse of what could be perceived under certain light, at a certain angle as...*gasp*.. a roll!!! Does this mean Fed is now out of shape? Is he retiring? Well the ********* are all over this like Mirka to a cinnamon roll on Sunday morning.
- Back to Sharapova - that dress has some quite hot and others quite bothered. But the real focal point are the sneakers. Not a wise selection Masha! And can you just believe the commercial she shot? She has just reminded us how smugly arrogant she is which has brought under the spotlight the age old question of whether or not she is as loud in bed as on the courts.
- Roddick's game just plain sucks and no one really has any encouraging words for the towel biter.
- Serena is shrieking like a wild hog at a southern barbecue and her butt is so big it fills the entire television screen. Perhaps that is where Fed's missing Walmart racquet has been hiding?
- Female tennis sucks - nothing really new to the endless whining and moaning on this topic. The female players should have to play five sets like the men, but no one wants them to gain an ounce of muscle as they may take on the above noted "manly" physique. Now that would just be all bad.
- Hot ticket item: Fed didn't know who Althea Gibson is. Can you believe it? And he calls himself a tennis star? Perhaps Dimensia is slowly creeping in or maybe he is missing the "close" relationship with Roache - who knows? If you can't tell us that she was a black female tennis star before the open era then you better not call yourself a Swiss dagnabbit!!
Ahhh...you guys never fail to amuse me. Thanks for the giggles and I look forward to updating this thread with the riveting conversations which I have no doubt will come in the final half of the first week.
