Adult Tennis Players Excuse thread

C

chatt_town

Hall of Fame
I have played Tennis for a while now. I've never heard though so many crazy excuses for losing in my life. So I thought I'd start an excuse thread to see what funny excuses have you heard or used. I'll start....


"He pushes the ball"(as if the player was suppose to ask him what kind of ball he wanted to hit)

"The wind was blowing"(as if the wind was only blowing on your side of the net)

"He hooked me at 3-3 in the firs"(Nevermind the 6 double faults in the first 2 service games)

"I hadn't hit a ball in two weeks"(but you've been playing for 6 years now and you didn't know taking two weeks off would make your game so bad)
 
"The birds flew in front of me right when I was going to hit the ball".

"I was tired from playing every day the last 2 weeks."

"Damn airplane flew right over head when I hit my serve" [I have to call myself out on this excuse :)]
 
"I have a newborn, I haven't slept in 3 months."

That was my excuse last summer/fall, and I'll get to use it again next spring/summer.
 
bcart1991 said:
"I have a newborn, I haven't slept in 3 months."

That was my excuse last summer/fall, and I'll get to use it again next spring/summer.
Click to expand...

Congrats!! I get to start using it this winter... twins so I get to play twice as bad with a legit excuse. :)
 
"The birds flew in front of me right when I was going to hit the ball".

"I was tired from playing every day the last 2 weeks."

"Damn airplane flew right over head when I hit my serve" [I have to call myself out on this excuse
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It seems like I have heard all these before
 
"I was keeping one eye on the sidewalk outside the gate in hopes someone will walk by and toss the ball we hit out back over."



Ok, so I never actually said those exact words, but I did play poorly during one of my service games because I wasn't concentrating enough on the game because I did keep checking outside the fence for someone walking by. Once we got the ball back, I did make the comment, "Now I can concentrate on playing tennis!"
 
Nuke said:
"You just beat me because I'm out of shape."
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I hear a variation of this one since most of the people I play against are older and more out of shape than I am. My favorite excuse so far has been

"I'm too old to run after those drop shots, you won't keep hitting them."

which was later followed by

"I'll beat you when you aren't so on point with your drops"
 
Not to be sexist, but:

"I was distracted by the gorgeous females playing next to our court :shock:"

I'm sure females have an equivalent about men. :???:
 
I just thought of another (inspired loosely by esgee48's post):

"I was distracted watching the people play on the next court over."


Sometimes if there are quality people playing next to me, I can get distracted in between my own points watching them.
 
I don't think they do. They aren't like men. We were in a championship match in Daytona one year and this gorgeous woman walks through between serves and the partner of the receiver on the other side called a let. We turned around and saw the woman slowly walking and instead of getting pi$$ed we turned and watched her and then when she was out of sight(about 20 more seconds) the guy looks at the server and says.."take two" and crotches down to receive and was dead serious. We played the point out and then laughed about it during the crossover. It doesn't take much for men...especially in the summer. :) A man could walk by in nothing but a tube sock(if you know what I mean and I think most women would play right on through. They take the points seriously. :)


esgee48 said:
Not to be sexist, but:

"I was distracted by the gorgeous females playing next to our court :shock:"

I'm sure females have an equivalent about men. :???:
Click to expand...
 
"Those guys won because they're not very good. They don't know how to put pace on the ball."

Surprised that one wasn't listed yet.
 
Mauvaise said:
"I was keeping one eye on the sidewalk outside the gate in hopes someone will walk by and toss the ball we hit out back over."



Ok, so I never actually said those exact words, but I did play poorly during one of my service games because I wasn't concentrating enough on the game because I did keep checking outside the fence for someone walking by. Once we got the ball back, I did make the comment, "Now I can concentrate on playing tennis!"
Click to expand...

I suffer from the same thing. I need that 3rd ball in my possession, or at least in the guys pocket across the court, or I get distracted by it. I insist on having all 3 balls whenever I'm moving from one service court to the other so I'm not distracted. I'll sprint up to the net and grab the 3rd ball after a point. It's pretty OCD.
 
"I'm just coming off an injury"

Yeah, you're 50, I'm 40, most likely we'll both be coming off an injury for the rest of our lives if we keep playing.
 
It was...I just used different wording..."he pushed the ball". lol I think that is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. That's another way of basically saying the other person was smarter to me. A guy this past weekend from a college in atl told me his coach called me a pusher. We played for 3 hours in Mobile a few years back and he beat me 6-4 in the third. I explained to him his own coach does the same thing to them when he plays them. So what makes me any different than him. :) He also went on to say that was the toughest match he played in his entire career while in college. I think there are different ways to play tennis. I use whatever works at that moment. I know some guys that will tell you that I over power them all the time. :)


Taxvictim said:
"Those guys won because they're not very good. They don't know how to put pace on the ball."

Surprised that one wasn't listed yet.
Click to expand...
 
I like to start with all 3 if I can. I'm not to anal about making you walk to the other court to get the third if I have two in my pocket but I do want to start with all 3 and if I can keep all 3 on my side. If it is on the fence I will ask for it so I don't have to be looking for a second after every point. :)


dman72 said:
I suffer from the same thing. I need that 3rd ball in my possession, or at least in the guys pocket across the court, or I get distracted by it. I insist on having all 3 balls whenever I'm moving from one service court to the other so I'm not distracted. I'll sprint up to the net and grab the 3rd ball after a point. It's pretty OCD.
Click to expand...
 
Heard from a higher level players....He took the entire amount of time he was allowed for breaks on changeovers and it threw my rhythm off.:???:
 
Heard from a higher level player....He took the entire amount of time he was allowed for breaks on changeovers and it threw my rhythm off.:???:[/QUOTE]
 
mikeler said:
"Damn airplane flew right over head when I hit my serve" [I have to call myself out on this excuse :)]
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Every year, the Washington State Open in Seattle is played during the same week as the Blue Angels air show. It really is the most distracting thing when a plane does a low fly by mid point. The noise they make scares the crap out of me.
 
"I just changed my diet."

This was actually my excuse to my dubs partner when I had to retire due to the worst calf cramps ever endured. Story is, a couple of weeks before I got blood test results and cutting a long story short cholesterol was 7.5 and it was change my diet or go on statins for life. I chose the former, cleaned up my diet and in the process vastly reduced my salt intake. Body still recovering from this when I play a match and after just over an hour I collapse in a heap not able to continue.

This happened last month and I'm happy to say that my body has got used to the new diet regime and I'm careful to eat bananas and take on electrolytic fluids. No problems since!
 
emilyhex said:
"I never play singles."

- then you look at their USTA record and discover that no, that's not true.
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I've gotten that many times. "I'm a doubles player." and their USTA record states otherwise. They must think that no one looks them up.
 
TomT said:
I have a hangover.
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young guys use this all the time. its like dood - we're college students. we all have hangovers

"this guy is sandbagging"
"these balls are crap"
"my back is acting up, couldnt hit my kick serve"
"it takes me a long time to warm up in winter"
"wind is bad for me because i hit flat/have a high ball toss/am made of paper"
"i left my sunglasses/cap at home"
"the net is too low - we need singles sticks"
 
"I was being abused by my 27 year old girlfriend for hours last night guys. Sorry I got nothing left.

Actually said to his partner and to me and my partner (all 40+ year olds) on the court after he played terribly.

disclaimer: she is 27 and yes she is hot.
 
chatt_town said:
I don't think they do. They aren't like men. We were in a championship match in Daytona one year and this gorgeous woman walks through between serves and the partner of the receiver on the other side called a let. We turned around and saw the woman slowly walking and instead of getting pi$$ed we turned and watched her and then when she was out of sight(about 20 more seconds) the guy looks at the server and says.."take two" and crotches down to receive and was dead serious. We played the point out and then laughed about it during the crossover. It doesn't take much for men...especially in the summer. :) A man could walk by in nothing but a tube sock(if you know what I mean and I think most women would play right on through. They take the points seriously. :)
Click to expand...
Ah, hold on there just a minute. I am easily distracted by men in shorts, exerting themselves in the pursuit of fun and fitness and have a devil of a time playing next to a male four-some. Funny, though, never happens to me when I'm playing or watching Mixed. Something about another woman being involved that flips the "on" switch "off."

But just the tube sock, nah, that wouldn't get my attention, except to complain to the Club Pro about the (lack of) dress code. And at my age, I've stopped paying any attention to a male who doesn't look old enough to grow any facial hair. But gray or bald (natural or courtesy Gilette) is OK by me.

As for excuses I've heard, my experience is much like Cindy; it's all about the pace. Either too much or not enough. :rolleyes:
 
g4driver said:
"I was being abused by my 27 year old girlfriend for hours last night guys. Sorry I got nothing left.

Actually said to his partner and to me and my partner (all 40+ year olds) on the court after he played terribly.

disclaimer: she is 27 and yes she is hot.
Click to expand...

This is 100% excusable. The match should be rescheduled. ;)
 
g4driver said:
"I was being abused by my 27 year old girlfriend for hours last night guys. Sorry I got nothing left.

Actually said to his partner and to me and my partner (all 40+ year olds) on the court after he played terribly.

disclaimer: she is 27 and yes she is hot.
Click to expand...

Your tennis buddies are way more awesome than mine - especially the one with the 27 yo gf :-) Please adopt me :-)
 
Talking about women and who is on the other court, I've had mixed doubles partners start to play terribly when they get jealous of a good looking woman on the next court or if I flirt with the woman on the opposing side.
 
Sometimes we practice with a guy who always gets mad about something. He kept netting my slices and started screaming, "It's these God d***ned strings! I can't get it up!!!"

We had a hard time hiding our laughter.
 
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