Former #4 Jelena Dokic opens up about the years of abuse from her father

[Aussie Darcy]

It's been well known that her father was one of the craziest tennis fathers out there, along with Bernard Tomic's dad, Lucic-Baroni's father, Sanchez-Vicario's parents and many, many more but she's never opened up about it this much. She's written an autobiography and has done an interview with The Daily Telegraph.

Here's the article:

In her autobiography ‘Unbreakable’, released tomorrow, Dokic alleges her father whipped, beat, kicked and spat at her in a frenzy that began the day she picked up a tennis racket at age six and continued until she escaped the family home at 19.

“He beat me really badly,” Dokic told The Sunday Telegraph. “It basically started day one of me playing tennis,” Dokic said. “It continued on from there. It spiralled out of control.”

Jelena Dokic’s allegations include:

—Damir Dokic beating her so badly she once lost consciousness
—Dokic repeatedly whipping her with his leather belt because of “a mediocre training session (or) a loss, a bad mood”;
—Dokic spitting in her face, pulling her hair and ears and kicking her in the shins with sharp dress shoes, leaving her bruised and bloody;
—Dokic unleashing constant vile verbal abuse including calling his teenage daughter a “****” and a “*****”.

Damir Dokic, who now lives in Serbia, did not respond to attempts to contact him for a response yesterday.

Jelena Dokic said she contemplated suicide during her years of emotional and physical abuse, but said the emotional tirades “hurt more” than the physical attacks.

“[The beatings] happened almost on a daily basis, but I also struggled with the emotional situation,” Jelena Dokic said. “Not just the physical pain but the emotional [pain], that was the one what hurt me the most … when you are 11, 12 years old and hear all those nasty things … that was more difficult for me.”

Jelena Dokic said when she was just 17 in 2000, her father abandoned her at Wimbledon after her semi-final loss to Lindsay Davenport, leaving her at the courts and refusing to allow her to return to the hotel room she was paying for.

This was one of the hardest moments for me,” she said. “If I had to pick one this was the one. If you are made to sleep at the courts …”

Even though she reached world No. 4 by the age of 19, she said her father was never satisfied by her achievements on the court.

Dokic’s book also details her life as a young refugee enduring extreme poverty, racism and bullying after the family’s arrival in Australia from the former Yugoslavia in 1994. She was told by an Australian player on a junior tennis tour “go back to where you came from” while an unnamed Australian coach said he would not have let Dokic “come back to Australia, let alone play for wildcards”.

She also reveals in the book the worst beating she ever received, after a first-round loss at the du Maurier Open in Canada in 2000.

“It was a really nasty memory that will stay with me forever … I ended up fainting,” she said in the interview. “He beat me really badly.”

She added: “The better I played the worse he got. Which is the one thing I couldn’t understand.”

In ‘Unbreakable’ Dokic details Damir’s drunken behaviour at Wimbledon and the US Open — episodes which led to the man dubbed “tennis dad from hell” to be banned from the women’s tennis tour for six months.

She said her father’s decision in 2001 to force her to switch nationalities from Australia to Yugoslavia is her greatest regret.

“If there is one thing I could take back what he did or certain decisions, leave all the physical stuff and abuse, this was the one I regret,” Dokic said in the interview.

“If I could turn back time, I would like to take back him making me switch from playing for Australia and playing for Yugoslavia … a few years later I came back and played for Australia ... but so much damage was done.”

Dokic said she doesn’t “hate” her father after everything he subjected her to.

“I tried to make things better [between us] but it is not an easy thing to do,” she said. “I don’t think he understands the things he has done. I don’t think he has taken the responsibility ... it’s difficult to find a middle ground with him. It’s either his way or that’s it.”

In 2009 Damir Dokic — who subsequently served a year in a Serbian jail for threatening to kill the Australian ambassador — admitted striking his daughter.

“If I was ever a little bit more aggressive towards Jelena, it was for her sake,” Mr Dokic told the Serbian newspaper Vecernje Novosti.

“When I was young, I was beaten by my parents and I am now thankful to them for that, because that helped me to become the right person. Anyway, is there any parent who didn’t do that at least once or twice — of course, for the sake of their children?” he said.

It's truly awful and unfortunately seems to be a common theme in the tennis community with overbearing, violent parents. The tours have been unfortunately lenient with these parents, a six month ban was the worst Dokic's father got, similar to John Tomic who only got a 12 month ban following his assault.

Anyway, it's great to see that she is past it now and in a better place, far away from her father.

 

[BVSlam]

Terrible thing. Of course, he himself obviously had terrible parents who taught him to behave like this by beating it into him, it all starts with upbringing. It even went so far that her father actually thinks it's the right way to raise a child. However, I'm glad she got away from it and hope she stays away from it for the rest of her life. Not only from the abuse of her father, but that kind of abuse in general.

 

[Tennis_Hands]

"The better I played the worse he got".

Probably the parent was aggressive by nature and her "faults" were just a pretext.

Maybe after she started getting successful envy and the shame from the realisation that he has been a complete DB fuelled the aggressive behaviour further.

 

[reaper]

A truly awful story. It was well known her upbringing was abusive, but I think the scale of the abuse would shock even those who thought they were familiar with her story.

 

[tennisaddict]

Physically reprimanding a child for poor performance was very prevalent couple of decades ago, more than what we realize.

As a society , I would think we have come a long way.

 

[Doctor/Lawyer Red Devil]

“When I was young, I was beaten by my parents and I am now thankful to them for that, because that helped me to become the right person."

Gold

 

[marc45]

her surviving the father from hell

long excerpts

http://www.adelaidenow.com.au/sport...r/news-story/32d1d00f64ca7fd32705eb6473eecb8a

if link not working, a shorter version...she's doing commentary now, so mods can move to FPP if you want

...........

JELENA DOKIC DESCRIBES EXTENT OF ABUSE FROM FATHER, COACH DAMIR DOKIC

by: KAMAKSHI TANDON | November 12, 2017

Former WTA player Jelena Dokic has described experiencing severe abuse from her father, Damir Dokic, as a child and then a teenager on tour.

Dokic has just released a book, Unbreakable, discussing her career and hardships. The former No. 4 broke with Damir, who was also her coach, in 2002, and publicly spoke about his abuse in 2009.

"He beat me really badly," she said in an interview with News Corp, describing an encounter that left her unconscious. "It basically started day one of me playing tennis... [and happened] almost on a daily basis."

Dokic said she was hit with a shoe and a belt, and also subjected to name-calling and expletives.

"Whether it was hitting, pulling my ears or whether it was just verbally abusing me and saying the most vile things to an 11 or 12-year-old," she said, adding that "not just the physical pain but the emotional...hurt me the most."

There were several publicized instances of Damir Dokic's unruly behavior while Dokic was on tour, including threats against public officials. It also appeared that in 2000, when Jelena was not allowed to return to her hotel room and spent a night on a couch at the All England Club.

But Dokic adds another incident at the Montreal event in 2000, referring to being beaten, kicked in the shins, and becoming unconscious. She was also forced to change her Australian nationality, but returned to the country in 2002. Even when she left his influence, Dokic said Damir repeatedly contacted her to return.

Following her career, Dokic said she had re-established contact with Damir, but his inability to "take responsibility" meant they could not have a normal relationship.

The 34-year-old recently returned to the game as a commentator for Australian television.

 

[Charlemagne]

That's truly awful. Incredibly heartbreaking and horrifying that a father could do that to their own child.

 

[Aussie Darcy]

her surviving the father from hell

long excerpts

http://www.adelaidenow.com.au/sport...r/news-story/32d1d00f64ca7fd32705eb6473eecb8a

if link not working, a shorter version...she's doing commentary now, so mods can move to FPP if you want

...........

JELENA DOKIC DESCRIBES EXTENT OF ABUSE FROM FATHER, COACH DAMIR DOKIC

by: KAMAKSHI TANDON | November 12, 2017

Former WTA player Jelena Dokic has described experiencing severe abuse from her father, Damir Dokic, as a child and then a teenager on tour.

Dokic has just released a book, Unbreakable, discussing her career and hardships. The former No. 4 broke with Damir, who was also her coach, in 2002, and publicly spoke about his abuse in 2009.

"He beat me really badly," she said in an interview with News Corp, describing an encounter that left her unconscious. "It basically started day one of me playing tennis... [and happened] almost on a daily basis."

Dokic said she was hit with a shoe and a belt, and also subjected to name-calling and expletives.

"Whether it was hitting, pulling my ears or whether it was just verbally abusing me and saying the most vile things to an 11 or 12-year-old," she said, adding that "not just the physical pain but the emotional...hurt me the most."

There were several publicized instances of Damir Dokic's unruly behavior while Dokic was on tour, including threats against public officials. It also appeared that in 2000, when Jelena was not allowed to return to her hotel room and spent a night on a couch at the All England Club.

But Dokic adds another incident at the Montreal event in 2000, referring to being beaten, kicked in the shins, and becoming unconscious. She was also forced to change her Australian nationality, but returned to the country in 2002. Even when she left his influence, Dokic said Damir repeatedly contacted her to return.

Following her career, Dokic said she had re-established contact with Damir, but his inability to "take responsibility" meant they could not have a normal relationship.

The 34-year-old recently returned to the game as a commentator for Australian television.

Cheers Definitely will be buying the book, i'm surprised by how many people didn't know about this. He was notorious for being a nutjob here in Australia. I guess people knew about the abuse but not exactly the extent of the abuse, such as leaving her behind after making the Wimbledon SF or beating her unconscious. It's come out yesterday that apparently Tennis Australia reported him to the authorities but nothing eventuated. Truly awful situation but unfortunately one that seems somewhat common with overbearing parents, just not as violent as this.

 

[Kalin]

People are dragged over coals for touching someone's butt 40 years ago. What Dokic did is incomparably worse; he should be taken to court, IMO. No wonder guy is in hiding.

No offense to the fine country of Australia but it seems to have developed a reputation for accommodating psychotic Eastern European tennis fathers. Maybe the authorities should indeed show some tennis balls and be more proactive about such things.