Giving 8.0 mixed one more try and then that's it

[tennisjon]

I am a 4.5 male who is playing mixed doubles for the first time this season. It is interesting for me to hear kinda what its like being on the receiving end.

First off, being a 4.5 male, I am usually the best player on the court. I probably have more variety and point construction than the other people on the court. Usually, I can hit harder and with more spin. But, just because I am better it doesn't mean that I will win and it doesn't mean I don't have my own weaknesses that can't be exposed.

One of the things I have noticed is that most people play everything to the woman and therefore the victories and losses tend to be more on her. The guys will try to poach or take 2/3 of the court and the woman has to hold up her 1/3. Good volleys and consistency are the two most crucial weapons for the woman.

So, how do I play? I try to play fair. I don't hit out 100% with pace. I will usually win with spin and make it hard for the opponents to hit clean balls. I try to set my partner up to put the ball away. I try to keep the ball deep and keep the opponents off the net and when they are there together, its down the middle or a lob over the female. Unless I feel we are getting cheated or the opposing team is head-hunting my partner, I don't peg the ball at the opposing female. I put balls towards her side at a difficult spot so that either she has a tough volley or the guy who hogs the court will leave a large hole on the other side.

How do I get beat? Well, it happens when my partner doesn't put enough balls in play or misses put away shots. It happens when the female opponent hits down the line behind me when I am trying to cover the middle. It happens when I fail to execute my game plan.

So far, so good this year. 5 easy sets won. 2 close sets lost. 1 easy set lost. But, 2 of those lost sets happened the first match and I learned a lot from it.

Stay with it. There is always things to learn and improve.

 

[polski]

Maybe just having more opportunities to play with the boys would help . . . .

Duhhhh. Do you really play with ladies only & then show up to play matches against guys? You definately need to practice with them if you expect to compete with them.

 

[dunloppedover]

You pull your weight by doing what it takes to play the best you can. Like someone else said if what you are about is winning then this doesn't sound like fun for you but it sounds like a blast to me. (But then again I enjoyed having a lefty with good aim smack spinny serves at me for 45 minutes until I finally figured out how to get to a few of them.) I play tennis to improve and the best way to do that is play people better than you and that isn't alway easy to set up.

The other thing is to look at what YOU are doing and how you can do it better. Okay, so you are slowing down -- are you willing to work off the court to improve your footwork? I taped a ladder and a circle on my basement floor to run drills on. I also took a lesson from a pro who showed me I was pushing off on the wrong foot AND going sideways instead of towards the post. He showed me I could move in and block return instead of being so far back I was sending engraved ace invitations. He reminded me stay on my toes instead of relaxing between serves (so THAT'S where my abs are!) Okay, so yeah, I'm obviously I'm not an advanced player but within 15minutes I was much faster than before.

I'm older than you and heavier than you but I relish the challenge of sending a rocket back cross-court just this side of the T hoping to catch the server hanging out at the baseline. And after he wakes up then blocking one down the line to see if I can streak it past his partner. Repeat after me ... "Bring it ON!" : - )

 

[dunloppedover]

Oh and Rabbit, where you at? We could have some fun at mixed it sounds like. Around these parts the older mixed leaguers have been doing it the same way for decades so there is no room for actually running around, playing hard and having fun.

 

[Bud]

See, there you go again, limiting your assension in tennis because you are afraid of the unknown and hate to lose.
Embrace the idea of returning this big server's shots. Lob DEEP CC to his partner, DEEP DTL when guy tries to poach, dink DTL as a fake. You are not taking him out of his comfort zone now. You guys are only trying to return the shots to CC, and he knows that.
Start the point from the baseline, it's more even.
In my experience, most real 3.5's can hang easily with any 4.5 woman.
So you, as a 3.5, can hang with a 3.0 man, but NOT a 4.5 in any way, shape, or form.
You want to win. That is the biggest limiting factor to your ability to get better in tennis. In tennis, you have to lose to learn how to win.

I recently played against a 16 yo girl who plays #1 on her HS team by quite a margin over the #2 and was also a ranked junior. IMO, she's probably a solid 5.0. My partner and I, both around 4.0+ beat her male partner (probably 3.5) and her 8-5 in doubles. In singles, my partner lost to her 3-6. So, yeah... a 3.5 male could probably hang with a 4.5 female. It seems there's about a level or so difference between males/females once reaching beyond 3.5

I thought it was a bit ironic competing against a 16 yo girl who has been playing the game twice as long as me at age 42 (her 8 years vs me 4 years).

 

[Cindysphinx]

Duhhhh. Do you really play with ladies only & then show up to play matches against guys? You definately need to practice with them if you expect to compete with them.

Duhhh right back at'cha. 4.0 and 4.5 guys are not all that interested in spending their tennis time practicing with 3.5 women. We don't have team practice either.

Which means the only times I get a look at a guy's serve is after we all warm up and he steps up to the line and says "Good match!"

Practice would help me a lot, but it ain't gonna happen.

 

[polski]

Duhhh right back at'cha. 4.0 and 4.5 guys are not all that interested in spending their tennis time practicing with 3.5 women. We don't have team practice either.
Which means the only times I get a look at a guy's serve is after we all warm up and he steps up to the line and says "Good match!"

Practice would help me a lot, but it ain't gonna happen.

I think I identified your biggest problem. You need a different team. If the guys on your team don't want to practice with their female partners, they won't be successful in mixed. Lack of chemistry = lack of success. You guys will end up looking like my avatar.

I always take a day or two a week during mixed season to play sets with my mixed partner(s). I don't want to figure out what they can & can't do during a match. it's more fun to have those details worked out ahead of time.

One of the best mixed teams in our area is a husband(average 4.5)/wife(mediocre 3.5) team. When you watch them, you think they'll get killed. Then you look at the scoreboard at changovers and are mystified. She is slow as can be, but she serves where he can get involved. He is super quick & lacks pace, but plays very smart and places his volleys just out of reach. Why they win so much is because they have been playing together for over 10 years.

 

[LeeD]

Seems to me.....
If 5.5 thru 7.0 women practice with men about 40% of the time, you should be able to get those guys around you to hit you serves and groundies.
Why wouldn't they? I'm a falling 4.0 now, and I would not mind hitting serves to anyone, 3.0 thru 7's, if they're nice and actually help to pick up balls.
As a stronger player 35 years ago, I remember hitting a few serves to MarcieLouie's MOM, just so she could see what it was like looking at a 125 mph lefty first serve. She must have been around 60 at the time. Her son, Ronnie, had hit serves that fast at her, but he was a normal rightie. Believe me, she did not stand in anywhere near the baseline.

 

[Elisa]

Duhhh right back at'cha. 4.0 and 4.5 guys are not all that interested in spending their tennis time practicing with 3.5 women. We don't have team practice either.

I would ask your partner to practice with you or ask your pro to spend some time serving to you in lessons. if you can get to the point where you can hit a bunt lob over the woman off of a tough dude's serve, it will make a huge difference. Your partner probably wants you to do well so that he does well.

Don't feel like 4.0 and 4.5 guys would never want to practice with you. I know a lot of guys who love mixed practice, not because it's the highest level of tennis, but because they like playing tennis and being around women at the same time.

I understand how you are feeling. I played 8.0 as a 3.5 woman, and, at first, it was incredibly intimidating. As I recall, I completely whiffed the first time a 4.5 guy sliced a serve out wide on me. Over time, however, I got so much better. And as Perry said, it will make the women's game slow down for you.

 

[Cindysphinx]

The captains are talking about maybe having some practices. The obstacles to doing so are significant. There is snow on the ground. You have to find an indoor court, and demand is huge.

You can't have practice at a private club even if someone is a member because the guest fees make it too expensive and some clubs restrict how many times a guest can play. You can do it if you hire a pro to supervise the practice, but that too is wildly expensive. And if you can't find a time that is convenient for people, the whole idea flops.

No way am I leaving my team in search of another, though. I know several 3.5 women who are trying to find an 8.0 team and can't even get on the roster. Nah, I either gut it out with this team or bail on 8.0 entirely.

 

[NoSkillzAndy]

I think I identified your biggest problem. You need a different team. If the guys on your team don't want to practice with their female partners, they won't be successful in mixed. Lack of chemistry = lack of success. You guys will end up looking like my avatar.

I always take a day or two a week during mixed season to play sets with my mixed partner(s). I don't want to figure out what they can & can't do during a match. it's more fun to have those details worked out ahead of time.

I want to echo this sentiment. If I'm going to play mixed doubles I want to make sure my partner is ready! I'll make sure to practice with her at least once before we actually play a match that counts. She needs to get used to seeing typical guy shots and typical guy power/spin. Plus, like polski mentions, I want to see what she's capable of and what we can try to patch up or polish before match time. Guys that can't be bothered to help out their partners with this shouldn't complain if their partners don't play well as they made no effort to help prepare them for what's to come.

Here's a basic check list of the things I want my mixed partner to be able to do:

* Get somewhat accustomed to guys' serves. She needs to get used to seeing fast serves, high kickers, and wide slices. I'm not asking for precision returns by any means, just a measure of composure when she encounters these serves so she has a better chance of handling them.

* Execute easy put-aways at the net. Having a partner who can finish at the net is crucial. If I set her up for a slam dunk she needs to be able to throw it down! This is mostly a mental focus and confidence thing so lots of encouragement helps here

* Lob. Half-way decent lob that won't get me killed. Some women are great at this, others need practice because they don't try it often enough or don't have confidence with it. This is a shot that can really help keep our team in the point and neutralize our opponents' attack.

* Reliable serve. Doesn't have to be spectacular, just something that can get the point started and that won't be a liability (as in double faults or absolute cream puffs). I make sure to tell my partner to expect the guy to try to crush her serve no matter what she does and to not be intimidated by it.

* Anything else is gravy really. Aggressive returns, good overheads, reflex volleys, touch at the net, quick movement, passing shots, etc. are all nice luxuries but not absolutely necessary to success in mixed.

 

[Z-Man]

Seems to me.....
If 5.5 thru 7.0 women practice with men about 40% of the time, you should be able to get those guys around you to hit you serves and groundies.
Why wouldn't they? I'm a falling 4.0 now, and I would not mind hitting serves to anyone, 3.0 thru 7's, if they're nice and actually help to pick up balls.
As a stronger player 35 years ago, I remember hitting a few serves to MarcieLouie's MOM, just so she could see what it was like looking at a 125 mph lefty first serve. She must have been around 60 at the time. Her son, Ronnie, had hit serves that fast at her, but he was a normal rightie. Believe me, she did not stand in anywhere near the baseline.

Z-Man to wife:
Tonight after work, instead of playing with the kids and helping get them bathed and in bed, I'm heading over to the tennis center to hit some serves to my mixed doubles partner. Don't wait up for me, I'll be home late...

 

[dlk]

Z-Man to wife:
Tonight after work, instead of playing with the kids and helping get them bathed and in bed, I'm heading over to the tennis center to hit some serves to my mixed doubles partner. Don't wait up for me, I'll be home late...

Post of day, so far

 

[PBODY99]

Teams should get together while the weather is good...........

The captains are talking about maybe having some practices. The obstacles to doing so are significant. There is snow on the ground. You have to find an indoor court, and demand is huge.

You can't have practice at a private club even if someone is a member because the guest fees make it too expensive and some clubs restrict how many times a guest can play. You can do it if you hire a pro to supervise the practice, but that too is wildly expensive. And if you can't find a time that is convenient for people, the whole idea flops.

No way am I leaving my team in search of another, though. I know several 3.5 women who are trying to find an 8.0 team and can't even get on the roster. Nah, I either gut it out with this team or bail on 8.0 entirely.

I refused to Captain another Mixed Doubles team after several seasons of trying to get the players to practice when the weather is warm. Yes, it is during the single sex seasons, but that is when the weather is better and you do not incur the cost of indoor time. T

 

[Cindysphinx]

Post of day, so far

Yes, it is.

People without families often don't understand. Male or female, if you able to get away often enough to play your own matches, you simply don't have time to practice as much as you would like.

 

[dlk]

Yes, it is.

People without families often don't understand. Male or female, if you able to get away often enough to play your own matches, you simply don't have time to practice as much as you would like.

No doubt. In the summer, the boss let's me play at least 3 times a week. But in the winter, the costs & finding a partner makes once a week the norm. It is achievable to play & raise a family, if you don't have too many other hobbies/interests.

 

[NLBwell]

I didn't play for eight years when my kids were little.
Priorities, priorities.

 

[LeeD]

Well, you chose your own path, so the consequences aren't so bad. Just think, when your kids are teenagers, they won't even talk to you ...
And of course, EVERY male in a mixed league is married with kids, right? None of them want their kids to play tennis, so NONE of them want their kids around the tennis courts with them.
And heaven forbid? The idea of bringing wifey or husband to the courts is just ...beyond reality!

 

[rainman007]

I am a 4.5 male who is playing mixed doubles for the first time this season. It is interesting for me to hear kinda what its like being on the receiving end.



So, how do I play? I try to play fair. I don't hit out 100% with pace. I will usually win with spin and make it hard for the opponents to hit clean balls. I try to set my partner up to put the ball away. I try to keep the ball deep and keep the opponents off the net and when they are there together, its down the middle or a lob over the female. Unless I feel we are getting cheated or the opposing team is head-hunting my partner, I don't peg the ball at the opposing female. I put balls towards her side at a difficult spot so that either she has a tough volley or the guy who hogs the court will leave a large hole on the other side.

H.

So you do play mixed? Our mixed season doesn't start til June is it mixed for everyone else already?

 

[eliza]

let's be nice

Yes, it is.

People without families often don't understand. Male or female, if you able to get away often enough to play your own matches, you simply don't have time to practice as much as you would like.

Please, that's far from true. I am single but have lots of committments, our priorities are just different.
I wish Tennis clubs were like some Gyms, open 24/7

 

[dlk]

Please, that's far from true. I am single but have lots of committments, our priorities are just different.
I wish Tennis clubs were like some Gyms, open 24/7

That'd be awesome. Have scan-card for after hours. Probably hard to find partner, but machine would work. Plus court time could be free or minimal. My gym is 24/7 & I utilize it all the time during 12AM to 6AM time, through the week.

 

[Fedace]

Z-Man to wife:
Tonight after work, instead of playing with the kids and helping get them bathed and in bed, I'm heading over to the tennis center to hit some serves to my mixed doubles partner. Don't wait up for me, I'll be home late...

does this mean she will get lonely ?

 

[LeeD]

Another thing I don't get...
You get off work by 5.
You get home by 6.
You can eat dinner with wifey and kids, hit the courts, and easily be back snuggling with wifey by 10:30.
And you can switch "wifey" with husband.

 

[sureshs]

Z-Man to wife:
Tonight after work, instead of playing with the kids and helping get them bathed and in bed, I'm heading over to the tennis center to hit some serves to my mixed doubles partner. Don't wait up for me, I'll be home late...

I prefer to do the same with my singles partner.

 

[Cindysphinx]

Another thing I don't get...
You get off work by 5.
You get home by 6.
You can eat dinner with wifey and kids, hit the courts, and easily be back snuggling with wifey by 10:30.
And you can switch "wifey" with husband.

Who gets off work by 5?

Who can get home by 6?

 

[Connors Fan]

Leed,

I find some of your posts interesting/entertaining, but really now you are being a bit silly. If you still have kids at home, its possibley not the best parenting to eat and then run off to play tennis to improve your mixed results.

I think its a nice idea if one has time and can do it, but to suggest that everyone has time to do that and is just being lazy if the dont, is likely not very accurate. Most people playing, and on these boards for sure play as often as they can.

On second thought though, maybe you sacrificing your spouse, kids, job, health and other activities is the right thing to do to improve your "recreational" tennis.

 

[sureshs]

Who gets off work by 5?

Who can get home by 6?

Not me, but plenty of others at my club do. Some will take only such jobs where they can do that, or get off even earlier. Some have modified their work hours to start really early so they can get off early and land up in the club.

 

[NoSkillzAndy]

I understand that most people have busy schedules. But if the only tennis you play is matches, you're not going to see large scale improvements in your game. There needs to be a significant segment of practice time in your routine so you can grove your strokes, fine-tune technique, work on new shots, etc.

If this means cutting back on participation in some leagues, ladders, or tournaments, then that's a sacrifice you'll have to make if you truly want to improve in tennis. Either that or create more times to hit in your schedule so you can add in practice sessions. Now on the other hand, if you're content with being a "weekend warrior" then by all means continue to play as many leagues, tournaments, and ladders as you can fit into your schedule without making room for practice and then post here complaining about how you're stuck in a rut with your game

 

[gameboy]

There needs to be a significant segment of practice time in your routine so you can grove your strokes, fine-tune technique, work on new shots, etc..

That is why many of us are content to remain at 3.5 or 3.0...

 

[Edward DFW]

Please, that's far from true. I am single but have lots of committments, our priorities are just different.
I wish Tennis clubs were like some Gyms, open 24/7

they should be... one of the few local clubs with indoor courts is pretty expensive over $200 a month + $16 an hour for indoor court time and they close way early... weekend hours are a JOKE... I could easily justify their fees (even though I feel they are a ripoff) if they were open more often

I'm talking about TBarM here in Dallas FYI.

 

[Edward DFW]

Who gets off work by 5?

Who can get home by 6?

People do... I don't know how but they do. I want to find one of those jobs.

 

[LeeD]

A previous post by me mentioned YOU MADE THE CHOICE, not me, not god, not your best buddy, not your kids, not your S/O....
So tough beans, you chose your lifestyle, be responsible for taking the responsibility of your choice.
How can you get good? You can't! You chose so when you decided to take on all that stuff.
That's why I always seem to be on a different (not better) plane of existence than you guys.
I chose to focus on my sports.

 

[Fedace]

I really dislike 8.0 mixed doubles anyway. Too many Middle aged, midlife Crisis women showing up with 2 kids with Massive amount of Cellulite in the Butt and Legs........Yuk,,,,,run away..................................ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

 

[ksteph]

Do you think you're getting anything out of it, Ksteph?

Our team is nice, and I dig all of the fellas. It's kind of hard to constantly feel like you're not pulling your weight though, ya know?

I actually have an idea. You know how I try to get courts on Saturday mornings to play with the girls? I think I may start inviting our 8.0 mixed male teammates instead. You wanna give this a try with me? Maybe just having more opportunities to play with the boys would help . . . .

That would be a wonderful idea. To answer you first question, after playing with different male partners yesterday (team practice in Baltimore), I can say that the more I play mixed, the more I'm getting use to it. I was able to hang with heavy hitters and I surprised myself. I guess the clinics are helping me out.

 

[Cindysphinx]

I really dislike 8.0 mixed doubles anyway. Too many Middle aged, midlife Crisis women showing up with 2 kids with Massive amount of Cellulite in the Butt and Legs........Yuk,,,,,run away..................................ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

What are you, 12 years old?

 

[Xisbum]

People do... I don't know how but they do. I want to find one of those jobs.

Easy - get up before 5 a.m., hit the subway by 5:30, reach the office at 6, and you, too, can be home before 6 p.m.

 

[Cindysphinx]

Easy - get up before 5 a.m., hit the subway by 5:30, reach the office at 6, and you, too, can be home before 6 p.m.

If it's so easy to be home by 6, how come the freeway is gridlocked until 7?

Anyway, we all know that we could drop everything, ignore all other responsibilities and focus on recreational tennis. Then again, we might wind up living in a van down by the river.

 

[Xisbum]

If it's so easy to be home by 6, how come the freeway is gridlocked until 7?

If you get to the office at 6 a.m., you get to leave around 4 p.m. And using Metro bypasses the freeway altogether.

That works for me, but can't speak for anyone else.

 

[JoelDali]

What are you, 12 years old?

 

[SoftTen]

Honestly, I have some doubts about the maturity of age here though.

 

[struggle]

what man v woman ratings are equivalent?

3.5/4.0?

this isn't a bashing point, but if a difference does exist AND you ad a
difference in actual computer/what-haveya ratings, that can equate to
a large discrepancy in skill levels on court. to be sure.

maybe mixed combo leagues are setting themselves up for this, it seems.

 

[Cindysphinx]

If you get to the office at 6 a.m., you get to leave around 4 p.m. And using Metro bypasses the freeway altogether.

That works for me, but can't speak for anyone else.

In my profession, that would be considered a part-time job!!

 

[esgee48]

I worked for decades from 6 AM to 3 PM. Of course, when HQ is East Coast and I'm West Coast... Thankfully, now retired!

Cindy - If you can get your male partners to practice some, it really helps. Seeing the pace as well as playing against people with those shots will aclimate you in a hurry. When I can, I try to get into a mix with 4.5(B) or 5.0+ whom I know. When you play against guys like that, shots from others appear relatively slow.

 

[Z-Man]

I work 8:00am-5:30pm and have a 10 minute commute. But it doesn't matter how much I work. If I turned down 2.5 hours of playtime with the kids to go hit with a 3.5 woman, I would have some explaining to do...

 

[Maui19]

What are you, 12 years old?

That's pretty harsh. He is at least 14. I think...

 

[eliza]

Take it back

What are you, 12 years old?

Cindy, I said men are more businesslike in their approach to tennis issues. This is the exception to the rule.
Go girls, whatever you have, rock it.
Grow up, dude!
And seriously, let's not make a competition of our daily duties/responsabilities. It was our choice, and we can change it if we do not like it. Do not want to bathe the kids, or listen to your wife? Then divorce.

Cindy how many hours of practice are you putting in? How many lessons?

 

[Fedace]

What are you, 12 years old?

No insult intended. Only reason a man could have in playing mixed doubles is that there is a good chance he could hook up with a Hot girl or woman sometime later....

 

[LeeD]

That head of the nail sure is sore by your last post ....:shock::shock:

 

[Cindysphinx]

No insult intended. Only reason a man could have in playing mixed doubles is that there is a good chance he could hook up with a Hot girl or woman sometime later....

I stand corrected.

Eleven years old, tops.

 

[Cindysphinx]

Cindy, I said men are more businesslike in their approach to tennis issues. This is the exception to the rule.
Go girls, whatever you have, rock it.
Grow up, dude!
And seriously, let's not make a competition of our daily duties/responsabilities. It was our choice, and we can change it if we do not like it. Do not want to bathe the kids, or listen to your wife? Then divorce.

Cindy how many hours of practice are you putting in? How many lessons?

I live in an area that gets too cold for outside practice from Dec.-March. These days, I am not practicing at all. At best, I can rally or play a practice set if a league match doesn't take the full two hours and if someone else is willing to stick around to hit. I am taking a weekly private lesson and the occasional clinic (1-2x a month).

In warm weather months, practice varies a lot depending on family life, injuries, availability of practice partners. I try to hit serves 1-2 hours a week (or zero hours if my shoulder is sore), and I go out and drop feed/wall hit if I have a match where I felt I wasn't hitting well. And if I get lazy with my normal fitness stuff, I will sometimes try to make up for that with some solo practice.