I Keep Trying to like Mixed, but just can't

[samarai]

the winning mixed teams have a women who is proficient at the net and is at least .5 better rated than the man. If you don't fall into this classification, then your team wont go very far.

 

[LeeD]

Fun mixed. DanaGilbert and SusanBrown (both A/Open women) vs VascoMyers and me, around C players but maybe a litttle better at doubles. We played maybe 5 sets total. Lost, 4 won one in the middle.
Mareen and Marisa Louie against us again. Never beat that combo, but Mareen was maybe 6.0 at the time. Actually, we never got more than 3 games in any sets. Marisa could hit just too hard for us, or any man below A level.

 

[tennismonkey]

leed -- why do you name people that no one has heard of?

 

[dcdoorknob]

that just never happens......

but I agree that mixed CAN be fun with the right participants, but it's definitely an acquired taste.

I've played a mixed gender doubles ladder before, and as a 3.5 guy I end up playing mostly against other 3.5 guys and 4.0 women (unless I overachieve occasionally and get bumped up to the 4.0 guys, to promptly get sent right back down again). Great fun, and gender really isn't an issue at all, people just play tennis and we're all on very close the the same level. It's my favorite league I've managed to be a part of.

If USTA changed mixed so that the woman needed to be rated 0.5 higher than the guys, imo the USTA mixed leagues would just get about 10x more fun.

 

[goober]

leed -- why do you name people that no one has heard of?

He is trying to name drop.

Doesn't really work though if nobody knows who you are talking about.

 

[LeeD]

TennisMonkey....
You must be young. As a youngster, ignorance is bliss. As you age, you find out that you need to learn some history, so maybe it won't repeat itself.
MareenLouie was a top A/Open player when I met her, went on to win a couple of WTA events in the early 80's.
Her sister, Marisa, hit the ball faster than any person I'd seen, male or female, and I was playing Open Men's tourneys the following year. Head case, of course.
Dana was Brad's younger sister. She called Brad a pusher, as she liked to hit hard.
Susan was the #1 rated A/Open NorCal in 1979.

 

[Cindysphinx]

her groundstrokes are better than her net play. She hits a low flat groundstroke thats pretty good. I just need a way to convince her to stay back.

I agree that I may be better off staying back on her serve.

OK, now we have something we can work with!

She has good groundstrokes but a weak approach volley and serve.

What is needed is an approach that discourages her (poor) S&V without dissing her (poor) S&V.

Can you suggest that you two try signaled poaches? The reason I suggest this is that many servers are reluctant to S&V in signaled poach situations. They shouldn't be, but it is often more than the brain can process. So you signal go, she crosses behind you and comes to net whenever she wants. If you have solid poaches and can handle the guy's pace at net, it might work. At a minimum, you will force the returner to do something other than smoke a Xcourt return at her feet.

Also, you might try starting two back on her serve, telling her that you will mirror her position. If she comes in, you say, you will keep up with her so that you form a wall. The point of this idea is that they might stop directing their returns right at her and may instead try to go up the middle or try drop shots.

That said . . . sometimes in mixed you just have to accept that you are going to lose.

 

[JackB1]

OK, now we have something we can work with!

She has good groundstrokes but a weak approach volley and serve.

What is needed is an approach that discourages her (poor) S&V without dissing her (poor) S&V.

Can you suggest that you two try signaled poaches? The reason I suggest this is that many servers are reluctant to S&V in signaled poach situations. They shouldn't be, but it is often more than the brain can process. So you signal go, she crosses behind you and comes to net whenever she wants. If you have solid poaches and can handle the guy's pace at net, it might work. At a minimum, you will force the returner to do something other than smoke a Xcourt return at her feet.

Also, you might try starting two back on her serve, telling her that you will mirror her position. If she comes in, you say, you will keep up with her so that you form a wall. The point of this idea is that they might stop directing their returns right at her and may instead try to go up the middle or try drop shots.

That said . . . sometimes in mixed you just have to accept that you are going to lose.

Last week, I suggested signaled poaches while she is serving and she said "no cause it gives me too much to think about while serving"....so I resorted to playing Australian, which worked better than regular setup.

She insists on coming to the net behind a ordinary shot and gets hurt that way. I keep hoping she'll realize this herself and stay back, but she doesn't.

 

[LeeD]

Why are you trying sooo hard to play with this ignoramous? Is she insists on beating her head against a rock wall, just walk away and let someone else play with her.
You did your best, it's time for a shrink.

 

[v-verb]

Doubles just suck. Mixed is a pain and on league night I got stuck with this guy who criticised every shot I made. Next time he'll get my racquet up his a&&

 

[LeeD]

Doubles can certainly suck, talking paired with an incompatible partner.
But paired with a compatitible partner, similar goals, his strengths complimenting your weaknesses, and your strengths complimenting his weaknesses, it's pretty fun, when played competitively.
My best tennis bud is a horrid doubles player. He insists on staying back even when I serve, and I can tell him.....Look, nobody returns my serve with a strong shot....he stays back, I serve, the return is a pooper up the middle almost every time. I can S/V, the return is still a mishit pooper. But he continues to stay back....

 

[Fuji]

**YES!!**

This is exactly how coaching is done properly.

I once had a partner who didn't do it that way. She would see a weakness in the opponents and then start acting like I was a short-order cook:

"She has no BH -- Hit to her BH!"

"She's short -- Lob your return DTL!"

"She's tall -- Slice it low!"

Dang. If I could execute all those things on command, I would be playing at a higher level.

Haha! I love this post. I'm fairly confident in my shot selection, and when I played mixed doubles a couple weeks ago the women was a very low 3.0. I'm a little bit higher ranked myself, so my shot selection was a bit easier to command.

Our points literally went on as:

Her: "Hit a kicker out wide and I'll volley it for a winner."

Her: "When you hit a pass, make it dip low and when it pops up, I'll put it away."


We did this, and won rather easily simply because her communication setup exactly what she wanted. Even though she's not a very strong player, (she was the lowest ranked person on court,) she was able to let me know exactly what she wanted me to do to set her up at net. Perfect mixed doubles for me!

-Fuji

 

[LeftyRighty]

Those things would confuse me.

I would much rather my partner, mixed or not...tell me:

He has no BH, target his BH.
or
Slice it low...and everything else in the quote above...

The things you posted Fuji would just confuse me and I'd ignore them lmao.

All this means I gotta find out how to talk to my partner in their way. Pretty cool, never thought of that. I just say "STOP F'ING UP!" LMAO. jk jk

 

[TimothyO]

I agree wit the OP. I've tried competitive mixed (ALTA) and hated it. Maybe at really high levels the difference between men and women are not as great skil-wise but at least at mid-level (high B, low A) there seems to be a significant difference in ability. Even our team's teaching pro advises players to focus on the opposing woman to score cheap points.

He says that mid-level women don't see much pace and spin and can't handle it.

 

[Angle Queen]

I'm not in agreement with the general attitude that women can't hold their own; here in So Cal there are many very good 4.0 and 4.5 players with smart court positioning and solid volleying skills.

My HUGE complaint with Mixed is the combination of ratings to make a team. It's the only season that pits players against each other with a 1.0 rating difference. This can't be done in regular seasons so why Mixed?

There are several teams in our area that have 4.5 men and 3.5 women playing together. Aside from creating a tremendous mismatch, there could be safety issues. Seriously guys, you are a 4.5 and you get satisfaction of playing a competitive match against a 3.5 lady?

USTA needs to change Mixed to a straight rating, 3.5, 4.0, 4,5 etc. If someone wants to play up a .5, good for them, at least they know what to expect. No one should be allowed to play down a level.

This, this and more of this.

The real answer for "combo" in mixed is so-called Queens Doubles, where the woman must be equal or higher rated than her male partner, e.g. in 7.5Q...it would be a 4.0W/3.5M. 4.5M, admittedly, would get the raw end of this deal but could still play 9.5Q with a 4.5W and that would be some truly high-level mixed doubles. And it might even give an incentive for some of the ladies who float around that 4.5/5.0 bubble to go on and give it what they've got instead of trying to manage their rating to a 4.5...so they can still play...at all.

Those high-end issues aside, I'd venture that the rest of the rec playing population would probably like it a whole lot more.

 

[JackB1]

I agree wit the OP. I've tried competitive mixed (ALTA) and hated it. Maybe at really high levels the difference between men and women are not as great skil-wise but at least at mid-level (high B, low A) there seems to be a significant difference in ability. Even our team's teaching pro advises players to focus on the opposing woman to score cheap points.

He says that mid-level women don't see much pace and spin and can't handle it.

Hey Tim. I have found that even at Mid A level, after the 1st 2 lines, the dropoff is pretty significant in the womens skill set. Seems like every team has solid women at the #1 and #2 lines, but then it trails off after that. The solution for me may be to actually move down a bit in levels, so I am playing the #1 and #2 lines with the team's top women.

Tim...the main reason I play mixed is because I want to play in between the 2 ALTA men's seasons (fall and spring). I don't know why they don't offer year round leagues for mens only? Maybe they are worried that the mixed would fall apart? I know there is USTA men's, but I think USTA is too expensive.

 

[OrangePower]

This, this and more of this.

The real answer for "combo" in mixed is so-called Queens Doubles, where the woman must be equal or higher rated than her male partner, e.g. in 7.5Q...it would be a 4.0W/3.5M. 4.5M, admittedly, would get the raw end of this deal but could still play 9.5Q with a 4.5W and that would be some truly high-level mixed doubles. And it might even give an incentive for some of the ladies who float around that 4.5/5.0 bubble to go on and give it what they've got instead of trying to manage their rating to a 4.5...so they can still play...at all.

Those high-end issues aside, I'd venture that the rest of the rec playing population would probably like it a whole lot more.

Agreed; if mixed were say 8.5, 9.5, etc instead of 8.0, 9.0, and then the rule was woman has to be at or higher level than the male, then for example 8.5 combos would be 4.0M + 4.0F or 4.0M + 4.5F. That would make for better quality tennis.

 

[Fuji]

Those things would confuse me.

I would much rather my partner, mixed or not...tell me:

He has no BH, target his BH.
or
Slice it low...and everything else in the quote above...

The things you posted Fuji would just confuse me and I'd ignore them lmao.

All this means I gotta find out how to talk to my partner in their way. Pretty cool, never thought of that. I just say "STOP F'ING UP!" LMAO. jk jk

Hahaha! I play a lot better if you just tell me what I need to do, regardless of who I'm playing with. Especially on serve. I love it when I have a partner that has somewhat of a plan off my serve, since it makes my life so much easier haha.

-Fuji

 

[t135]

playing mixed means just rewiring your approach. play regular men's league if you want regular tennis.

you play mixed tennis if you like your tennis wacky and like a good challenge. these challenges include:

1 - you must hold serve every time.
2 - you must make just about every return.
3 - you must help your partner hold serve.
4 - you must at least break your opposing female's serve and as a bonus the guy's serve too.
5 - you must put your partner in winning positions.

funny thing is this is the same strategy for regular dubs. the difference is how aggressively you execute this strategy.

This is very true.

 

[Adles]

1 - you must hold serve every time.
2 - you must make just about every return.
3 - you must help your partner hold serve.
4 - you must at least break your opposing female's serve and as a bonus the guy's serve too.
5 - you must put your partner in winning positions.

I'd add #6 - you must put the ball away before the other team has a chance to hit it to your partner. Admittedly, this is difficult on receiving games.

 

[purple-n-gold]

Read last year on here, that a former mixed playa.. substituted mixed with a brisk jog around the block, then they would quickly run into their house, and in front of a mirror would repeatedly slap themselves in the face

 

[Torres]

Perhaps it's not the W partner, perhaps you're too weak to carry the team.

In MOST cases, the W is the weaker partner. I have played 10.0 and 9.0 mixed where the W is clearly the more consistent player who easily held her own.

To me, playing mixed is more complex than men dbls. You have to figure out what works (with your particular partner) and what doesn't and set aside some typical "doubles convention" like S/V.

You need to figure out what your W partner strength is (net or baseliner)... and go from there. At 7.0 and 8.0, YOU need to take over and cover what she's not comfortable with. You need to call her off on overheads if you have a play at it. You need to chase down more balls than her. You need to poach more. You need to keep more balls in play and need to put away more short balls.

You need to figure out how to hold HER serve.

YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU....

Notice I didn't even bring up the role of the W in the partnership?

I couldn't agree more. If I drop into lower level mixed, I only do so on the assumption that I'm going to be one doing all the running, doing all the covering, putting all the heat down in service games, putting all the pressure on the play, and going to have to be doing a good impresson of Pat Rafter at the net. All I ask of a lower level mixed partner is that she can keep the ball deep. If she can't do that, then the whole thing's a waste of time.

The problem here is that OP is 3.0-3.5 and with the greatest respect, not particularly athletic. If his partner's similar, then they're always going to struggle. It's not surprising that he's not enjoying it. But I don't think this is about mixed - its more about two players who aren't quite strong enough to cover or complement each other's games. You can get that in mens dubs as well.

 

[tennismonkey]

I'd add #6 - you must put the ball away before the other team has a chance to hit it to your partner. Admittedly, this is difficult on receiving games.

+1. absolutely. i always feel in mixed that if i have opportunities to put the ball away -- i HAVE to put that ball away. there's no hitting a safe shot.

it's this aspect of mixed that has been helpful for me in regular men's dubs. when facing competition that is better than my partner and i -- i feel like i have to take advantage of opportunities and put shots away. just rolling the shot back into play and waiting for their mistakes or another opportunity is not an option because they are few and far between. so i feel like if i have a perfect opportunity, i go for it. and i live with the consequences knowing i pulled the trigger at the right time at least.

 

[escii_35]

3.5/4.5M vs 4.0/4.0


4.0M middle of the road sgl's player/ bottom of the barrel doubles player talking

1 - you must hold serve every time.
2 - you must put your partner in winning positions!!
3 - you must make just about every return.
4 - you must break your opposing female's serve
5 - find a compatible partner!

Because my game is all about ball control and hitting lines (slow first step and I don't hit the ball that hard) the most important thing I can do is put my pard in winning positions. I need a partner with one or two explosive shots -I- can exploit. If we lose because her money shot is off that day so be it. HER fault, keep the positive vibes going, so be it, better luck next time.

A pard with good hands and no explosive shot is a bad fit.

4.0M/3.0F usually turns into a really bad version of L formation with me hucking heavily topped moonish things into either doubles alley and praying my opponents can't overhead. Even more frighting is being paired with a net averse 3.0.

At the end of the day the best thing I can here is, "wow your partner played really well and hardly missed a shot." What they don't understand is my job is to make her look REALLY good, not to play amazing doubles. Attacking me at the net = free points for them. Attacking my partner after a setup shot = points for us.

Changing MXD to where teams had to be balanced or the female as the higher player could be interesting.

 

[floydcouncil]

I couldn't agree more. If I drop into lower level mixed, I only do so on the assumption that I'm going to be one doing all the running, doing all the covering, putting all the heat down in service games, putting all the pressure on the play, and going to have to be doing a good impresson of Pat Rafter at the net. All I ask of a lower level mixed partner is that she can keep the ball deep. If she can't do that, then the whole thing's a waste of time.

The problem here is that OP is 3.0-3.5 and with the greatest respect, not particularly athletic. If his partner's similar, then they're always going to struggle. It's not surprising that he's not enjoying it. But I don't think this is about mixed - its more about two players who aren't quite strong enough to cover or complement each other's games. You can get that in mens dubs as well.

Well put!!!

 

[JackB1]

The problem here is that OP is 3.0-3.5 and with the greatest respect, not particularly athletic. If his partner's similar, then they're always going to struggle. It's not surprising that he's not enjoying it. But I don't think this is about mixed - its more about two players who aren't quite strong enough to cover or complement each other's games. You can get that in mens dubs as well.

You couldn't be more wrong. I haven't played 3.0 since I started playing 4 years ago. I am currently playing mixed A4 ALTA which equates to 4.0 with some 4.5s on the upper lines. Me and my partner are 2-1 currently and won our past 2 matches easily.
As far as being "athletic", I never claimed to be, but think I am moreso than the average 52 year old. I have been playing 4.0 for 3 seasons now in one singles league but have a hard time winning at 4.0, but I am competitive enough to not get bumped down. I consider myself a strong 3.5 and have beaten several 4.0 singles players. In my recent 3.5 season, I made it to quarterfinals in playoffs and knocked off many higher seeded players.

Some people get off by insulting others and Torres has done this many times before. He never provides any proof of his own playing ability, but loves to criticize and argue with others. Basically just a miserable person, who gets his giggles by knocking others down.

 

[chatt_town]

I don't agree with the defining territory stuff. The reason is it only gives most women a false sense of security. Some of the guys I know complain a lot about mixed but the reality is many guys are responsible for the bad play. When you put women in the alley or things of that nature you are doing her a disservice.

I remember the guy that was trying to coach my wife had her playing like 9.0 mixed doubles and we had been playing tennis for all of 8 or 9 months. He was basically controlling the entire court as he was clearly an open player. Well we couldn't win at 7.0 mixed together because I found myself at an disadvantage because I was cover lobs that were landing in her service box and she was switching...I was like "o hell nawwwlll".

I had a long talk with her about how she had to get better and her thing was I was the problem because she was winning a 9.0 mixed. I explained to her that you are winning because he's playing lower than what he should be. I had to go out and win tourneys with about 6 different women at 7.0 and 8.0 to show her that the only problem I had was I wasn't able to put away overheads from no man's land or have 3 of my serves not come back...but I shouldn't rely on that playing 7.0 and 8.0.

Of course now some years later we are winning together at 8.5. We just won a tourney memorial day weekend. Of course everyone wants to play with both of us but I tell women all the time that it's not me it's her winning many of the matches because now I don't have chase down lobs all the time or if someone leaves one up short she is cranking out the overheads.

I blame men because we tend to tell women as long as they are hitting the ball hard they are playing good tennis and we all know that is bs. I now don't play with women that are 250 pounds and can't move because it will only frustrate you as a man. Wife still gets intimidated by men that are rifling the ball but I just deal with that. We got smoked up this weekend in alta with guy that was smoking balls. We made adjustments but we still lost the second in a tie break. I played two guys the very next day that smoked it just like this one guy did in usta and we smoked them 0 and 1. We vollied that ***** right back between them every time they did it and when they hit at us....we hit right back at them...men's 4.0 tennis at it's best. well from our stand point.lol

You just have to get with a couple of women man and work with them and above all tell them the truth and don't ask them to do things you can't do. Don't ask them to kick serve into the backhand when you can't get to their backhand. It is as rough as men make it at the end of the day.

do you have a regular partner? practice too if its competitive for you, if your partner wont practice then they are that social player and find a new one. this would be no different than if it were a man. some ppl play for fun , others for beating the snot out of ppl, others to get outside and gab. if is she isn't of a great skill level find a partner who wants to compete first. I'd ratehr play with a 2.5 who wants to fight than a 3.0/3.5 who just wants to be in the sun for an hour.

Other than that don't play standard doubles. if your partner is getting hit have her stand back at the baseline, clearly define territory . wit ha weaker partner i say cover the line and don't worry about anything else.
or if she doesn't want to move back have her move a lot closer, some ppl have good reflexes and its when they have more time they jack it up. have her sit on the dang net, it might work.

as for opponents don't be afraid to hit it at the girl for real, and if you go for the guy aim low....in most of these situations the guy is a net predator and will poach everything he can, they are usually not ready for low balls, they are waiting for that soft nice ball hit back to the lady.

 

[chatt_town]

Yep...and that's why many men don't like mixed and believe me...many women think exactly the same way you just spoke here and that's why they concentrate on getting the strongest guy they can get with.

Many haven't figured out yet that it doesn't matter how strong the guy is if you as a woman can't return serve and getting the man's balls knocked off serving 3 inches over the net and the man on the other side has both feet inside the service box crow hopping on the return...lol.

Perhaps it's not the W partner, perhaps you're too weak to carry the team.

In MOST cases, the W is the weaker partner. I have played 10.0 and 9.0 mixed where the W is clearly the more consistent player who easily held her own.

To me, playing mixed is more complex than men dbls. You have to figure out what works (with your particular partner) and what doesn't and set aside some typical "doubles convention" like S/V.

You need to figure out what your W partner strength is (net or baseliner)... and go from there. At 7.0 and 8.0, YOU need to take over and cover what she's not comfortable with. You need to call her off on overheads if you have a play at it. You need to chase down more balls than her. You need to poach more. You need to keep more balls in play and need to put away more short balls.

You need to figure out how to hold HER serve.

YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU....

Notice I didn't even bring up the role of the W in the partnership?

 

[RetroSpin]

OK, sorry, but a lot of this wingeing sounds like guys who want to blame their partners for losses. The other team has players with the same rankings and they somehow make it work. Doubles is not that hard, particularly at the levels you're talking about. Get your first serve in, don't make dumb mistakes, don't go for too much, hit it down the middle when in doubt, put your opponents in awkward positions and support each other.

The biggest complaint I hear from women is that their partners either try to do too much or are too critical of them. Don't be that guy. Women are sensitive, for the most part. They don't react well to their partner yelling, getting mad, etc. Be Cary Grant and you may be surprised that your partner plays better instead of falliung apart when it gets tight.

 

[heftylefty]

...The biggest complaint I hear from women is that their partners either try to do too much or are too critical of them. Don't be that guy. Women are sensitive, for the most part. They don't react well to their partner yelling, getting mad, etc. Be Cary Grant and you may be surprised that your partner plays better instead of falliung apart when it gets tight.

Quote for truth!

I am one of those rare guys that likes playing mixed dub. Being kind and supportive are the keys to success in mixed dubs. I want my partner to feel she's part of a team. I ask for advise, even when I know I am stronger, more experienced player. If she misses, so what. I miss too. I don't tell her how to hit a tennis ball; but I do make suggestions on where to hit the ball.
And the biggest thing is I make sure we laugh and have fun even in tight tournament matches.

 

[RetroSpin]

Continuing on this theme of bashing guys, LOL, exactly how much do you expect from your partner? If she can either occasionally return the other guy's serve effectively and volley, you should be more than OK. All she has to do beyond that is make sure she hits all her shots to the other woman(or over her head if she's at net) and returns the other woman's serve out of the netman's reach. Typical 3.5 moonballs will accomplish all that.

 

[tennixpl]

we can respectively disagree. in 3.0-4.0 mxd with a weaker partner and adjustment must be made for the weaker player. defining territory may not be the best, i am thinking of my experience where the lady is better at the net than she thinks and i try to get her focused on that, give a defined space to worry about, I don't get mad or anything if she goes for something outside it bc she thinks she can make it. never stifle someone but narrow their focus if you can make up for it. i poach like crap, i want to let my partner know my weak spots so they know where to compensate. but i can run around like a fool and get good defensive shots back, so i try to give them less territory to think about. this will be strategy in regular doubles too since i tend to play with less mobile partners

no matter what the doubles unless you are playing perfect don't get mad at your partner, even then its called a team effort.

also in mixed a guy will get mad at the lady for missing a shot when the real issue is he set her up to get that bad shot. just bc we generally hit harder doesn't mean we are hitting a better shot, in fact it can often be detrimental in a skewed set up of skill.

I don't agree with the defining territory stuff. The reason is it only gives most women a false sense of security. Some of the guys I know complain a lot about mixed but the reality is many guys are responsible for the bad play. When you put women in the alley or things of that nature you are doing her a disservice.

I remember the guy that was trying to coach my wife had her playing like 9.0 mixed doubles and we had been playing tennis for all of 8 or 9 months. He was basically controlling the entire court as he was clearly an open player. Well we couldn't win at 7.0 mixed together because I found myself at an disadvantage because I was cover lobs that were landing in her service box and she was switching...I was like "o hell nawwwlll".

I had a long talk with her about how she had to get better and her thing was I was the problem because she was winning a 9.0 mixed. I explained to her that you are winning because he's playing lower than what he should be. I had to go out and win tourneys with about 6 different women at 7.0 and 8.0 to show her that the only problem I had was I wasn't able to put away overheads from no man's land or have 3 of my serves not come back...but I shouldn't rely on that playing 7.0 and 8.0.

Of course now some years later we are winning together at 8.5. We just won a tourney memorial day weekend. Of course everyone wants to play with both of us but I tell women all the time that it's not me it's her winning many of the matches because now I don't have chase down lobs all the time or if someone leaves one up short she is cranking out the overheads.

I blame men because we tend to tell women as long as they are hitting the ball hard they are playing good tennis and we all know that is bs. I now don't play with women that are 250 pounds and can't move because it will only frustrate you as a man. Wife still gets intimidated by men that are rifling the ball but I just deal with that. We got smoked up this weekend in alta with guy that was smoking balls. We made adjustments but we still lost the second in a tie break. I played two guys the very next day that smoked it just like this one guy did in usta and we smoked them 0 and 1. We vollied that ***** right back between them every time they did it and when they hit at us....we hit right back at them...men's 4.0 tennis at it's best. well from our stand point.lol

You just have to get with a couple of women man and work with them and above all tell them the truth and don't ask them to do things you can't do. Don't ask them to kick serve into the backhand when you can't get to their backhand. It is as rough as men make it at the end of the day.

 

[BreakPoint]

Anyone else with this issue?

I just love playing tennis and all things tennis, but playing Mixed just drives me crazy. The difference between the men and women is usually very pronounced and so EVERY MATCH eventually turns into this:
1) whenever you need the point...hit at the girl
2) to end a rally quick...hit at the girl
3) guy hits at girl.....repeat, repeat, repeat.

Also, MOST women are just playing mixed tennis for social reasons and are very casual about winning or losing. With myself being very competitive, its not a good combo. It seems like EVERY team has 1 or 2 strong female players and then the rest of them are interchangable and near the bottom of the ratings level you are in. There just aren't enough really good female players to go around in these leagues and that causes lots of disparity between the male female's playing levels.

I keep trying to like mixed every season, but every year I keep asking myself "why"? I keep thinking this time it will be different...more fun..more competitive, but its not.

You took the words right out of my mouth!

 

[heftylefty]

Continuing on this theme of bashing guys, LOL, exactly how much do you expect from your partner? If she can either occasionally return the other guy's serve effectively and volley, you should be more than OK. All she has to do beyond that is make sure she hits all her shots to the other woman(or over her head if she's at net) and returns the other woman's serve out of the netman's reach. Typical 3.5 moonballs will accomplish all that.

Fair question.
What I expect from my Mixed Dubs partner is the following:
1) Have fun. If it's not fun, not play. That does not mean you not to be competitive; but this is not life and death.
2) If you think you got the shot, go for it. I rather have a 3.5 player that is not afraid of missing the shot than one who's afraid of ever going for the shot.
3) Know that the opponent will be gunning for you. Be ready at all time.

If we lose a match, it's no more my partner's fault than it's mine despite how well I may have played. It's a team effort!

 

[looseleftie]

Must admit, that mixed is aweful!! All the play gets directed to your partner, who in your opponents eyes can create the less damage, and not handle the pace of their shots possibly as well as their male counter part, not trying to be a male pig here, but it is the truth regrettably, at least at most club/rec levels!!

It is a team game, but when the ball is always hit away from u, and net exchanges in doubles are always directed right to your female team mate, then it's time to have a good luck at why on earth u are playing mixed in the first place...

For me, it is a waste of my time, played a social doubles set tonight, with a weaker female, I believe I was almost a spectator in many of the points..

That is where we make choices as to what standard/format of competition we want to play.. Certainly, don't bit#h and moan about your female partner EVER, and especially if u know full well what u are signing up for!! Play mens only, or singles!

Mixed is really social only, sorry sounds very ignorant here..

On a side note watch some mixed doubles at Wimbledon coming up, that can be great!! But club level mixed is just plain grating!!

 

[TimothyO]

OK, sorry, but a lot of this wingeing sounds like guys who want to blame their partners for losses. The other team has players with the same rankings and they somehow make it work. Doubles is not that hard, particularly at the levels you're talking about. Get your first serve in, don't make dumb mistakes, don't go for too much, hit it down the middle when in doubt, put your opponents in awkward positions and support each other.

The biggest complaint I hear from women is that their partners either try to do too much or are too critical of them. Don't be that guy. Women are sensitive, for the most part. They don't react well to their partner yelling, getting mad, etc. Be Cary Grant and you may be surprised that your partner plays better instead of falliung apart when it gets tight.

This is very true and one reason even my wife is getting sour on mixed.

She only plays doubles and enjoys mixed for the social aspect. But too often the guy wants to coach her DURING the match and in spite of the fact that he's usually less consistent. The female player often ends up facing three opponents instead of just two.

For many guys putting them on court with women is like putting them back in high school. They're determined to show the women and the male opponent how hard they can hit no matter how often they miss. Then they demonstrate their masculinity through displays of manly anger as they cough up UEs.

Her favorite male partners are those who remain calm, play within their abilities, and communicate to coordinate and encourage instead of trying to tell her how to play.

I'll play casual mixed for giggles and social connections. And this being ALTA I'll even help out with food for home matches. But I don't even attend mixed practice sessions anymore.

 

[Larrysümmers]

my problem is that i aim for the female too much. i should hit deep cc to the male, but the female is dtl at the net, so i gun it at her and usually the ball just gets volleyed away from us.

 

[stapletonj]

two words to avoid the "male spectator" issue

"planned poach"

or

"aussie formation"

 

[Cindysphinx]

But too often the guy wants to coach her DURING the match and in spite of the fact that he's usually less consistent. The female player often ends up facing three opponents instead of just two.
. . . .

They're determined to show the women and the male opponent how hard they can hit no matter how often they miss. . . . .

Her favorite male partners are those who remain calm, play within their abilities, and communicate to coordinate and encourage instead of trying to tell her how to play.

Fellas, are you listening?

My female partners hardly ever coach me, and if they do it once my icy stare will remind them to knock it off.

Men? Men cannot seem to help themselves. I have had guys coach me for the entire two hours. And I mean coaching/criticizing stroke mechanics, which is the one thing no one can change in the middle of a match.

You know what helps? Use your brain and notice what is happening on court, and then let's work together to execute a strategy. I remember one time I was playing with a wonderful mixed partner. I was playing dreadfully, but he didn't coach. He just kept playing well and waited for me to stop screwing up. Finally I asked him what I could do to hold when serving out the set. He suggested Aussie. Four points later, the set was ours.

Regarding guys who overhit . . . I don't think they do it out of some caveman impulse. They do it because hitting hard is all they know. They don't have all the shots (an approach volley, angles, slices and especially lobs). They have two speeds: Hard and harder.

At the same time, they handicap themselves by refusing to hit hard at the woman. No wonder they can't win.

Fellas, stop being so prideful. Take a lesson. Learn how to volley from anywhere in the court so you can join your partner at net. Learn how to slice so the opponents will pop it up to your partner. And for the love of all that is good and holy, learn to lob, preferably with topspin.

Once you can do that, mixed will be a fun challenge where you showcase your variety.

 

[tennixpl]

^^^^ okay so i asked my partner last night if she could move up Me - "hey can you skoot closer to the net you are hanging by the service line, just as much as you feel you can do"
Her- "you mean with the guy..."
Me-"both, just be confident and step a little closer"

 

[user92626]

^^^^ okay so i asked my partner last night if she could move up Me - "hey can you skoot closer to the net you are hanging by the service line, just as much as you feel you can do"
Her- "you mean with the guy..."
Me-"both, just be confident and step a little closer"

Did it work?

You make it sound like people can suddenly acquire a new skill.

I find it far more productive to let partner do what they do comfortably and I step up to cover...

--

I read the OP's posts I see his glaring problem. He misplaces his attention and energy. A big key to mixed (or lopsided partner) doubles' success is you don't focus on your weak partner. It's futile. Instead, you focus on exploiting the other team's weak partner. And tell your partner to join in, whatever she could do.

If you have room to expand, ask your weak partner to play within her comfort zone which means she's gonna play well. For instance I asked my mobility challenged woman partner to not bother with chasing down ball. Just cover 30% of the court and I'll do 70% and the running. We beat the other team which were two guys easily this way because my partner wouldn't miss much and our game plan and coverage were very clear and predictable. I was clear about what I needed to do and that was a huge step forward already.

 

[stapletonj]

Of course, this sounds sexist, but it is based upon experience. It is also really true in both mixed and same sex doubles.

Tell every single female partner....be as aggressive as you can humanly be, dont be afraid to go for it, come to the net, hit away, I've got your back.....

Actually, if your mens doubles partner is significantly weaker than you, same thing......so maybe it's not as sexist as I thought..........

Cindy is right, correcting stroke mechanics is NEVER a good idea in a match.

It's all about the skill of one player encouraging another, not coaching another. Kind of like be a cheerleader for your partner, except, guys, don't wear that cheerleader skirt during the match, just for the warmup, so you can weird out your opponents...........

 

[tennixpl]

well we won.... and i can't cover her volleys for her..... she is getting eaten alive at her feet bc she stands at the service line to take volleys. i cover the rest, i was mostly trying to adjust her strategy within her control, not her strokes. we are 3.0-3.5s we can't hit a ball on commanded to a particular place. But she has good hands and most ppl at this level i feel react volley a lot better than they do when they think or half volley when they are at the service line.

i was asking more if this was the proper way to "suggest" and not "coach"

this was also WTT and i just subbed in which adds difficulty to the partner dynamic as she just switched partners and she herself was only in for four games.

Did it work?

You make it sound like people can suddenly acquire a new skill.

I find it far more productive to let partner do what they do comfortably and I step up to cover...

--

I read the OP's posts I see his glaring problem. He misplaces his attention and energy. A big key to mixed (or lopsided partner) doubles' success is you don't focus on your weak partner. It's futile. Instead, you focus on exploiting the other team's weak partner. And tell your partner to join in, whatever she could do.

If you have room to expand, ask your weak partner to play within her comfort zone which means she's gonna play well. For instance I asked my mobility challenged woman partner to not bother with chasing down ball. Just cover 30% of the court and I'll do 70% and the running. We beat the other team which were two guys easily this way because my partner wouldn't miss much and our game plan and coverage were very clear and predictable. I was clear about what I needed to do and that was a huge step forward already.

 

[LeeD]

Enjoy mixed for the novelty. Don't take it seriously.
If it's a competitive match, don't look at men vs women, look at it......you matched up against a TEAM of players, who should you hit at?

 

[AtomicForehand]

Mixed can really suck when you're playing with a weak guy.

I played mixed today and the opponents figured out pretty quickly that they should hit to my MALE partner. Guy has one speed--"CRUSH"--and has no idea how to construct points or play the net. If his bombs went in, we were golden. But the opponents noticed that a lot of the time, they didn't. So they targeted him.

He would say things to me like "You really need to hold serve here" while letting all kinds of balls come through to me that would have been easy put-aways if he would have just stuck out his racquet. I was amazed at how little he was helping me at net. More than once I was out of position to cover for him because I thought of COURSE he would hit it up there at net--but no. Even though he was a big guy he was easy to lob because he wouldn't take two steps back to smash. If a ball came *right* to him, he would smash it out of the park, which was great, but otherwise I had to cover 90% of the court on my own.

So, you players with dangly bits, listen up. Just because you can serve and smash harder than the woman doesn't make you the "stronger" player.

BTW, speaking of serves, he hit four aces today; I hit two. (One of which was to the opposing male.)

 

[JW10S]

Mixed can really suck when you're playing with a weak guy.

I played mixed today and the opponents figured out pretty quickly that they should hit to my MALE partner. Guy has one speed--"CRUSH"--and has no idea how to construct points or play the net. If his bombs went in, we were golden. But the opponents noticed that a lot of the time, they didn't. So they targeted him.

He would say things to me like "You really need to hold serve here" while letting all kinds of balls come through to me that would have been easy put-aways if he would have just stuck out his racquet. I was amazed at how little he was helping me at net. More than once I was out of position to cover for him because I thought of COURSE he would hit it up there at net--but no. Even though he was a big guy he was easy to lob because he wouldn't take two steps back to smash. If a ball came *right* to him, he would smash it out of the park, which was great, but otherwise I had to cover 90% of the court on my own.

So, you players with dangly bits, listen up. Just because you can serve and smash harder than the woman doesn't make you the "stronger" player.

BTW, speaking of serves, he hit four aces today; I hit two. (One of which was to the opposing male.)

There's an old adage in tennis that says in mixed doubles it's the female who wins it and the male who loses it. I've found that for the most part, with a very few exceptions, to be true. I've won a fair number of Open mixed doubles events and it's usually been because my female partner was stronger than the opposing female player and not that often because I was better than the opposing male player. A female who can return the male's serve, hit solid (not necessarily killer) overheads, and play her share of balls both a net and at the baseline is a big asset. Sometimes the female leaves too much to their partner and can cause him to make more UE's. Or other times the male can overplay and try to do too much which again results in errors. So I'd say if you're a male find a good female partner and I think you'll enjoy mixed doubles a lot more.

 

[directionals]

two words to avoid the "male spectator" issue

"planned poach"

or

"aussie formation"

That doesn't work. If your female partner is serving, your opponent can just chip lob over you. If you use Aussie, they will hit dtl easily since your female partner supposedly has a weaker serve.

 

[Maui19]

I find this thread quite ironic. Guys tend to hate mixed because they don't like playing with weak female partners. Women complain about how men play mixed incorrectly, which makes these men...weak partners! Bottom line: no one likes playing with weak partners.

I think this supports my original contention that mixed is awful. LOL

 

[OrangePower]

I find this thread quite ironic. Guys tend to hate mixed because they don't like playing with weak female partners. Women complain about how men play mixed incorrectly, which makes these men...weak partners! Bottom line: no one likes playing with weak partners.

I think this supports my original contention that mixed is awful. LOL

I completely agree with your conclusion, but for the record, my problem with mixed is playing *against* a weak (usually female) opponent. This requires abnormal shot selection.

 

[AtomicForehand]

I find this thread quite ironic. Guys tend to hate mixed because they don't like playing with weak female partners. Women complain about how men play mixed incorrectly, which makes these men...weak partners! Bottom line: no one likes playing with weak partners.

I think this supports my original contention that mixed is awful. LOL

I think Angle Queen was right. Mixed should be played preferably when the woman is as good as or preferably stronger than the man.

We should have one universal rating system so that a 4.0 player is a 4.0 player regardless of gender. That would make things a lot easier.