I give up. After years of lying and tricking myself, I can no longer hide my true identity: I like federer. I never wanted to admit it, I was so ashamed of this part of me I tried to hide it from the world, but it didn't work. I would log on to twitter, youtube, instagram, or any other social media site and pretend to be someone I wasn't. Everytime I watched one of his match highlights it filled me w a euphoria that only a win from my wta faves (kenin, kostyuk, mattek-sands) would give me. It killed me to see his face bc I knew he knew I never really hated him. I realized I had to stop, stop these lies and false hatred for an innocent man with a family. It is time for me to throw in the towel.