Tennis Intimidation: Does size matter? Race? Clothing? Equipment?

BlackLendl

BlackLendl

New User
Hello TTW;

i just started playing Tennis again after a 20+ year hiatus? My opponent for the last 4 months has been a wall. My skills are limited but through repetition the basics are starting to come back to me.
The problem is, I can't seem to find a hitting partner. when practicing my serve I constantly ask complete strangers if they're intrested in getting some rallies going. I've been turned down quite a few times now.
Which leads me to wonder, is it bad luck or my appearance that's turning these potential hitting partners away. I do acknowledge that I might be intimidating size wise at 6'3 and 285lbs. But could it also be that I am a black man.
Please, TTW universe shed some light and pass on any experiences you might have.
 
Well, if you were a hot blond with big boobs, I'm sure you would have found a partner by now.

So I have to say yes: appearance does matter. But I don't know if the fact you're black matters.

Regarding if size matters, I suppose if you're walking around with your pants dropped, that might discourage people from interacting with you.
 
^^yea, I usually look for the cute blondes too! :-). Are you asking at a public park where pick up games and hitting partners are normal? If not I can see it being hard to find someone regardless of looks or ability. Probably the best way to get back into the flow is to find drill classes, ladders or pick up games on websites like Meetup or ads on a Craigslist.
 
I assume you're not a member of a tennis club, but there may be a community tennis association nearby that you can easily join.

In case you're not familiar, it's like a club but without a facility. They use public courts. Dues are typically very low (e.g., less than $100 per year) and it's a great way to meet new people who love tennis.
 
BlackLendl said:
Hello TTW;

i just started playing Tennis again after a 20+ year hiatus? My opponent for the last 4 months has been a wall. My skills are limited but through repetition the basics are starting to come back to me.
The problem is, I can't seem to find a hitting partner. when practicing my serve I constantly ask complete strangers if they're intrested in getting some rallies going. I've been turned down quite a few times now.
Which leads me to wonder, is it bad luck or my appearance that's turning these potential hitting partners away. I do acknowledge that I might be intimidating size wise at 6'3 and 285lbs. But could it also be that I am a black man.
Please, TTW universe shed some light and pass on any experiences you might have.
Click to expand...

You could be a threat to other males in mixed doubles due to your size (if you know what I mean), but not in singles or men's doubles. Large size in tennis seldom translates to more powerful shots.

Here is a simple suggestion: Start losing. Points I mean, not weight. Acquire a reputation as a loser. Be known as the guy who can hit well, but keeps losing in actual games. People will start loving you. Everyone loves someone who loses to him.
 
Get a whole bunch of tee shirts that say "black lendl" across the chest and the back. Hit with the wall. Definite conversation starter, especially if you use a universally loved font like helvetica.

People remember and love lendl (even those of us who preferred mac, mats, noah, Edberg and becker back in the 80s), and black guys are probably the most adored demographic in america today. You ought to have no problem making tennis friends, man.

I would hit with you. I would like to warn you that i would want to trade tee shirts afterwards.

In case blacklendl does not practice at the courts in my town, i am Going tee shirt place to get a couple of 'white noah' and 'black lendl' shirts made.
 
In the movies, big Black men speak in a squeaky high pitch and hint at a bit of gayness in order to defuse the tension. Don't be like that. But don't show up in tank tops and short shorts either.
 
A 285 pound man may be intimidating as a defensive tackle but not as a tennis player; I'll very happily play somebody that size.
 
sureshs said:
In the movies, big Black men speak in a squeaky high pitch and hint at a bit of gayness in order to defuse the tension. Don't be like that. But don't show up in tank tops and short shorts either.
Click to expand...

Yeah but what if he gay.

Well either way, Good advice. Shorts to the knee and an xl or xxl #blacklendl tee. Maybe put a bird on it. Be yourself, blacklendl. Be yourself.

Hey, i know a player who calls himself tha yellowfederer, or #aznfed. Maybe he can start being himself, too.
 
Silent said:
Well, if you were a hot blond with big boobs, I'm sure you would have found a partner by now.

So I have to say yes: appearance does matter. But I don't know if the fact you're black matters.

Regarding if size matters, I suppose if you're walking around with your pants dropped, that might discourage people from interacting with you.
Click to expand...



Good point about being blonde with "attributes"
Although it would be kinda hard to play with my shorts sagging.
 
Pbarrow said:
^^yea, I usually look for the cute blondes too! :-). Are you asking at a public park where pick up games and hitting partners are normal? If not I can see it being hard to find someone regardless of looks or ability. Probably the best way to get back into the flow is to find drill classes, ladders or pick up games on websites like Meetup or ads on a Craigslist.
Click to expand...

Thanks for the advice
 
Fifth Set said:
I assume you're not a member of a tennis club, but there may be a community tennis association nearby that you can easily join.

In case you're not familiar, it's like a club but without a facility. They use public courts. Dues are typically very low (e.g., less than $100 per year) and it's a great way to meet new people who love tennis.
Click to expand...

I'm in the process of relocating to Texas so I'm gonna definitely look into that, thanks!
 
BlackLendl said:
Hello TTW;

i just started playing Tennis again after a 20+ year hiatus? My opponent for the last 4 months has been a wall. My skills are limited but through repetition the basics are starting to come back to me.
The problem is, I can't seem to find a hitting partner. when practicing my serve I constantly ask complete strangers if they're intrested in getting some rallies going. I've been turned down quite a few times now.
Which leads me to wonder, is it bad luck or my appearance that's turning these potential hitting partners away. I do acknowledge that I might be intimidating size wise at 6'3 and 285lbs. But could it also be that I am a black man.
Please, TTW universe shed some light and pass on any experiences you might have.
Click to expand...

I have a friend that I play with, he's black and I'm white. People ask for his number way more than they ask for mine. I think it's because he hits better than me. It's hard to find people that hit like he does (hardest hitting guy I've ever played).

My guess is people aren't impressed with how you hit. Most people don't like to play down, so everyone is looking to play up. Check out craigslist "activity partners" and see what you find. Should be plenty in the 3.0-3.5 range, not that they know that.
 
slice bh compliment said:
Get a whole bunch of tee shirts that say "black lendl" across the chest and the back. Hit with the wall. Definite conversation starter, especially if you use a universally loved font like helvetica.

People remember and love lendl (even those of us who preferred mac, mats, noah, Edberg and becker back in the 80s), and black guys are probably the most adored demographic in america today. You ought to have no problem making tennis friends, man.

I would hit with you. I would like to warn you that i would want to trade tee shirts afterwards.

In case blacklendl does not practice at the courts in my town, i am Going tee shirt place to get a couple of 'white noah' and 'black lendl' shirts made.
Click to expand...

Wow! Now that's thinking outside of the box.
 
srimes said:
I have a friend that I play with, he's black and I'm white. People ask for his number way more than they ask for mine. I think it's because he hits better than me. It's hard to find people that hit like he does (hardest hitting guy I've ever played).

My guess is people aren't impressed with how you hit. Most people don't like to play down, so everyone is looking to play up. Check out craigslist "activity partners" and see what you find. Should be plenty in the 3.0-3.5 range, not that they know that.
Click to expand...


Not a hard hitter yet, more focused on getting the ball over the net consistently for more than 10 strokes. I tried the craigslist thing and so far I received one reply but the guy was in an even more remote Orlando suburb than I was. Not willing to travel 35-40 mins for hitting session but thanks for the suggestion.
 
I've asked more people than I care to admit to hit some balls with very limited success. Then my friend from Jamaica visits and people (some of the same) are asking him to hit with them. Its gotta be the accent, so practice saying "no problum, mon!"
 
sureshs said:
In the movies, big Black men speak in a squeaky high pitch and hint at a bit of gayness in order to defuse the tension. Don't be like that. But don't show up in tank tops and short shorts either.
Click to expand...

Hahahahaha hahahahaha I guess i'mma have to take the bass out my voice but I'll stay away from obscene retro 80's attire to get attention.
 
Gimmick said:
I've asked more people than I care to admit to hit some balls with very limited success. Then my friend from Jamaica visits and people (some of the same) are asking him to hit with them. Its gotta be the accent, so practice saying "no problum, mon!"
Click to expand...

It's Funny you say that, my family is from various parts of the caribbean so speaking wit an accent isn't out of the realm of possibilities.
 
ollinger said:
A 285 pound man may be intimidating as a defensive tackle but not as a tennis player; I'll very happily play somebody that size.
Click to expand...

I agree! If I was playing someone my size I would immediately assume slow movement/reaction time and footwork. Why doesn't anyone else feel that way ollinger?
 
BlackLendl said:
Hello TTW;

i just started playing Tennis again after a 20+ year hiatus? My opponent for the last 4 months has been a wall. My skills are limited but through repetition the basics are starting to come back to me.
The problem is, I can't seem to find a hitting partner. when practicing my serve I constantly ask complete strangers if they're intrested in getting some rallies going. I've been turned down quite a few times now.
Which leads me to wonder, is it bad luck or my appearance that's turning these potential hitting partners away. I do acknowledge that I might be intimidating size wise at 6'3 and 285lbs. But could it also be that I am a black man.
Please, TTW universe shed some light and pass on any experiences you might have.
Click to expand...

Maybe I'm crazy, but when I'm looking for someone to hit with, it's how WELL he hits that counts to me. . . in fact, I like two kinds of hitting partners--one who has a slight edge on me (fires up the competitive spirit) and a partner who's ALWAYS WILLING TO PLAY WHENEVER who is a level below me (so I can experiment with stuff and styles).

I don't think your size matters. It's tough finding a good partner since once you find one, you tend not to lose each other.
 
BlackLendl said:
I agree! If I was playing someone my size I would immediately assume slow movement/reaction time and footwork. Why doesn't anyone else feel that way ollinger?
Click to expand...

True. . . I'd go with a lotta slice and move you around the court and just plan to outlast you.
 
Well, my hitting group was a broad sampling of people from all over the world which is one of the best aspects of tennis, IMO. But getting a pick-up hit/game going depends on the place. Only a few spots are conducive to pick-up games in tennis.

Also people shy away from hitting if they don't know a persons' level.
 
I have a small group of people that I regularly hit with (sometimes matches, sometimes practice), a somewhat larger group that I don't play with frequently and then an email list which has about 40 people on it where people send emails out at the last minute or day looking for someone to fill in, usually doubles. There are a few people at work that play as well and sometimes I'll hit or ask if I'm curious as to their level.

Finding one or two tennis players that are in networks of tennis players can get you more people to hit with. Another approach around here is league play at clubs - you could sign up for a league or agree to be a substitute player if you can't play regularly.
 
max said:
Maybe I'm crazy, but when I'm looking for someone to hit with, it's how WELL he hits that counts to me. . . in fact, I like two kinds of hitting partners--one who has a slight edge on me (fires up the competitive spirit) and a partner who's ALWAYS WILLING TO PLAY WHENEVER who is a level below me (so I can experiment with stuff and styles).

I don't think your size matters. It's tough finding a good partner since once you find one, you tend not to lose each other.
Click to expand...

I would say the wall I hit with has a fairly good opinion of my hitting style
 
heninfan99 said:
Well, my hitting group was a broad sampling of people from all over the world which is one of the best aspects of tennis, IMO. But getting a pick-up hit/game going depends on the place. Only a few spots are conducive to pick-up games in tennis.

Also people shy away from hitting if they don't know a persons' level.
Click to expand...

Well that definitely sheds light on my present situation. You are fortunate to have a diverse group. I'll get there eventually, just need to get my foot in the door. As far as level goes, I let em know after introduction that I'm between a beginner and advanced beginner.
 
movdqa said:
I have a small group of people that I regularly hit with (sometimes matches, sometimes practice), a somewhat larger group that I don't play with frequently and then an email list which has about 40 people on it where people send emails out at the last minute or day looking for someone to fill in, usually doubles. There are a few people at work that play as well and sometimes I'll hit or ask if I'm curious as to their level.

Finding one or two tennis players that are in networks of tennis players can get you more people to hit with. Another approach around here is league play at clubs - you could sign up for a league or agree to be a substitute player if you can't play regularly.
Click to expand...

Yea, its only a matter of time. I'm a little guilty of discrimination myself. I need to expand my search field to include women, teenagers and seniors. I'm not competition ready yet but it is definitely a future option. I enjoyed doubles more than singles growing up so that's immediate future option.
 
What if it has nothing to do with physical appearance at all. Maybe it's the fact that I practice in basketball shorts/sneakers and baggy T shirts that makes everyone I approach feel like I'm not a serious tennis enthusiast. Ooooorrrrrrrr maybe it's the "size of my stick" (couldn't resist). Wilson Hyper Hammer 2.0 is almost 30 inches with a 115 sq ft head and looks like a cave mans club!

TTW I need some feedback on this.:?
 
I know lots of "David's" out there.
Most are tiny in stature, like 5'8" and skinny, less than 135 lbs. Those guys LOVE to slay the giants, giving them some meaning to their lives.
That means, you face a LOT of shots, against a fast player who is prepared to run all day at full speeds.
I'm NOT one of those.
 
LeeD said:
I know lots of "David's" out there.
Most are tiny in stature, like 5'8" and skinny, less than 135 lbs. Those guys LOVE to slay the giants, giving them some meaning to their lives.
That means, you face a LOT of shots, against a fast player who is prepared to run all day at full speeds.
I'm NOT one of those.
Click to expand...

Any of them named Ferrer?
 
movdqa said:
Any of them named Ferrer?
Click to expand...

Well, i know this one guy, he is a 5ft8 5.0 who calls himself the Fair-haired Ferrer.

I am still laughing about my new tee shirt idea. caucasianAshe, MexiTyson, latinoLebron, SwedeBarrySanders, ChinoRonaldinho, afroLaver and indoPele.

This is going to sell...i mean...help people make lots of friends at the park! And at the bar! Can you imagine the reaction from the fine ladies?
 
BlackLendl said:
Not a hard hitter yet, more focused on getting the ball over the net consistently for more than 10 strokes. I tried the craigslist thing and so far I received one reply but the guy was in an even more remote Orlando suburb than I was. Not willing to travel 35-40 mins for hitting session but thanks for the suggestion.
Click to expand...

Before you move to TX, look me up! I live in Dr. Phillips, near Universal. Can you get a T-shirt for me that says "Old Federer"? I don't want to screen print on one of my classic Fed tops!
 
Old federer is funny. But you might have some competition on that from nike, since they will have roger wearing the entire 'Old Federer' range in 2015, haha.

Young Rosewall.
Phat Rafter.
Fat Cash.
Slow Borg.


A women's line:
Girlyermo Vilas.
Vitas girlulaitis
Short Sharapova
Petite Serena
Straight bj king
Hetero Navratilova
Big Steffi
Arantxa sanchez blackario
 
slice bh compliment said:
Old federer is funny. But you might have some competition on that from nike, since they will have roger wearing the entire 'Old Federer' range in 2015, haha.

Young Rosewall.
Phat Rafter.
Fat Cash.
Slow Borg.


A women's line:
Girlyermo Vilas.
Vitas girlulaitis
Short Sharapova
Petite Serena
Straight bj king
Hetero Navratilova
Big Steffi
Arantxa sanchez blackario
Click to expand...

You left out:

Bjorntobewild!
 
BlackLendl said:
What if it has nothing to do with physical appearance at all. Maybe it's the fact that I practice in basketball shorts/sneakers and baggy T shirts that makes everyone I approach feel like I'm not a serious tennis enthusiast. Ooooorrrrrrrr maybe it's the "size of my stick" (couldn't resist). Wilson Hyper Hammer 2.0 is almost 30 inches with a 115 sq ft head and looks like a cave mans club!

TTW I need some feedback on this.:?
Click to expand...

Honestly you're still focused on random things that your future hitting partners will not care about at all. Start issuing invites to people you meet at your future club/community tennis association, rather than hanging out at the wall hoping to bump into somebody. Join a USTA team, a ladder, whatever - something a little more formal than pick up tennis.

What I think and hope you will find is that your future "regulars" are a diverse bunch. Old/new racquets, black/white, male/female, young/old, basketball/tennis shorts, etc.

I personally enjoy that quite a bit about tennis. One day my changeover conversation is about the prom and the next day's is about the aches and pains of old age!
 
stringertom said:
Indian Bjorn
Click to expand...
I like it.
Bjorn in the usa.
Hecho en Plaxico (nfl, giants fans)
One for my youngest....babyBjörn
One for the Pastor:
BjornAgain
And One for the little girl who lives down the lane:
stringertom said:
Bjorntobewild
Click to expand...

To wear after you grow out your hair, play tennis and sweat through a blacklendl tee:
John McEnFro, possibly john blackenFro. We will have to see how that plays with the focus groups in peoria.

For practioners of barefoot running and tennis:
Shoes-off matsuoka
For people who like japanese wta stars:
Ai will win!
...but are on the frugal side:
Cheap Daté

Period pieces....

60s theme:
Santana. Nah man, Manolo Santana.

For fans of 70s sitcoms: Pancho and the man

80s:
The Guy forZhay team (you know it is a tennis player if they can pronounce that one right)

For fans of 90s, gen x films:
John Slackenroe

Early 2000's tv:
Freaks and Yannicks
 
Last edited:
slice bh compliment said:
I like it.
Bjorn in the usa.
Hecho en Plaxico (nfl, giants fans)
One for my youngest....babyBjörn
One for the Pastor:
BjornAgain
And One for the little girl who lives down the lane:


To wear after you grow out your hair, play tennis and sweat through a blacklendl tee:
John McEnFro, possibly john blackenFro. We will have to see how that plays with the focus groups in peoria.

For practioners of barefoot running and tennis:
Shoes-off matsuoka
For people who like japanese wta stars:
Ai will win!
...but are on the frugal side:
Cheap Daté

Period pieces....

60s theme:
Santana. Nah man, Manolo Santana.

For fans of 70s sitcoms: Pancho and the man

80s:
The Guy forZhay team (you know it is a tennis player if they can pronounce that one right)

For fans of 90s, gen x films:
John Slackenroe

Early 2000's tv:
Freaks and Yannicks
Click to expand...

For the 80's: "don't u Forget about moi", non?
 
Simple Minds...good song there, Tom.

From a John (Pierre) Hughes film.

If pierre hugues herbert ever makes it as a top player (and with that serve i think he might),
"Air Bear"
 
LeeD said:
I know lots of "David's" out there.
Most are tiny in stature, like 5'8" and skinny, less than 135 lbs. Those guys LOVE to slay the giants, giving them some meaning to their lives.
That means, you face a LOT of shots, against a fast player who is prepared to run all day at full speeds.
I'm NOT one of those.
Click to expand...

I would welcome a "David" or two. I love a good challenge and I need to lose some weight anyway.
 
Ah, i see. I would probably feel that way too if i were cool enough to have known of them before that song and alive and kicking.

Thanks. Jaggy is a good egg. From the uk originally, too, so he probably liked them way before they were big over here.

Afro-ivan, sorry to derail, but i was at a tournament a few years ago,
"dont you forzhay about me" was on inside the lounge and a young player commented that it was from the american pie soundtrack. I smiled..haha...no way, what a maroon. I looked it up on my wife's phone. Turns out, it is! Some cover version, but it is!

Okay, back on topic.
Mr. blacklendl vs fair-haired ferru. It is on!

I am going to grow my mcEnfro out, get some headbands and play the winner.
 
Last edited:
slice bh compliment said:
Well, i know this one guy, he is a 5ft8 5.0 who calls himself the Fair-haired Ferrer.

I am still laughing about my new tee shirt idea. caucasianAshe, MexiTyson, latinoLebron, SwedeBarrySanders, ChinoRonaldinho, afroLaver and indoPele.

This is going to sell...i mean...help people make lots of friends at the park! And at the bar! Can you imagine the reaction from the fine ladies?
Click to expand...

Slice Bh, your full of ..... "Ideas". I hope your venture takes off and don't forget who inspired you
 
Yes, so cool, blacklendl just essentially said for me not to ...... forget about him.
I won't won't won't won't!

Speaking of lendl and music, blacklendl, do you know the famous quote about lendl by snoop dogg?
 
Last edited:
stringertom said:
Before you move to TX, look me up! I live in Dr. Phillips, near Universal. Can you get a T-shirt for me that says "Old Federer"? I don't want to screen print on one of my classic Fed tops!
Click to expand...

Sorry Lee, I think your mistakened. Slice BH is the major "T-shirt Conglomerate"
 
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