The most delusional player you ever met?

JW10S

Hall of Fame
I remember a guy who was around 20-21 who had never played any form of organized tennis; no juniors, no middle school, no high school, no leagues and had never played a tournament. But he said that by the end of the year he'd be playing pro tournaments and would do so by mainly practicing against a backboard. He always did the same thing; he'd hit 2 sort of rally balls then smash the 3rd one as hard as he could. He then would go retrieve the ball and do it again over and over. One time I showed him a drill that I thought would help him. The backboard was very wide so several people could use it at the same time, but usually it was empty. I took a ball and started hitting forehands from one end of the board all the way to the other end then turned around and came back the other way hitting backhands--I did it with 1 ball without stopping. I explained that instead of standing in one spot bashing balls this drill would help with control and footwork. I said he should aim to be able to go back and forth a few times without having to stop. He tried once, couldn't do it, and went back to his old routine. He entered a USTA Open tournament that had nominal prize money for the semifinalists and finalists and actually told people what he was going to do with the prize money. He lost in the 1st round 6-0, 6-0 then declared he was going to be a mountain biker.
 
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Fairhit

Hall of Fame
I remember a guy who was around 20-21 who had never played any form of organized tennis; no juniors, no middle school, no high school, no leagues and had never played a tournament. But he said that by the end of the year he'd be playing pro tournaments and would so by mainly practicing against a backboard. He always did the same thing; he'd hit 2 sort of rally balls then smash the 3rd one as hard as he could. He then would go retrieve the ball and do it again over and over. One time I showed him a drill that I thought would help him. The backboard was very wide so several people could use it at the same time, but usually it was empty. I took a ball and started hitting forehands from one end of the board all the way to the other end then turned around and came back the other way hitting backhands--I did it with 1 ball without stopping. I explained that instead of standing in one spot bashing balls this drill would help with control and footwork. I said he should aim to be able to go back and forth a few times without having to stop. He tried once, couldn't do it, and went back to his old routine. He entered a USTA Open tournament that had nominal prize money for the semifinalists and finalists and actually told people what he was going to do with the prize money. He lost in the 1st round 6-0, 6-0 then declared he was going to be a mountain biker.
Did he become a pro mountain biker?
 

johnmccabe

Hall of Fame
I remember a guy who was around 20-21 who had never played any form of organized tennis; no juniors, no middle school, no high school, no leagues and had never played a tournament. But he said that by the end of the year he'd be playing pro tournaments and would so by mainly practicing against a backboard. He always did the same thing; he'd hit 2 sort of rally balls then smash the 3rd one as hard as he could. He then would go retrieve the ball and do it again over and over. One time I showed him a drill that I thought would help him. The backboard was very wide so several people could use it at the same time, but usually it was empty. I took a ball and started hitting forehands from one end of the board all the way to the other end then turned around and came back the other way hitting backhands--I did it with 1 ball without stopping. I explained that instead of standing in one spot bashing balls this drill would help with control and footwork. I said he should aim to be able to go back and forth a few times without having to stop. He tried once, couldn't do it, and went back to his old routine. He entered a USTA Open tournament that had nominal prize money for the semifinalists and finalists and actually told people what he was going to do with the prize money. He lost in the 1st round 6-0, 6-0 then declared he was going to be a mountain biker.
This sounds to me more like poorly informed, rather than delusional.
 

jm1980

Talk Tennis Guru
This sounds to me more like poorly informed, rather than delusional.
People who have very little tennis experience seriously underestimate the amount of effort needed to become a good player

Yes, if you are pretty athletic you can quickly rise through the lower and intermediate levels of rec tennis. But you aren't going to go beyond 5.0 if you start as an adult.
 

JW10S

Hall of Fame
This sounds to me more like poorly informed, rather than delusional.
No, he knew how things worked, and he hadn't just started playing tennis at age 20-21, he just had never played any form of organized tennis. By 'pro tournaments' I meant that he thought he'd be playing Futures events to start and then would quickly rise to the main tour. When he would smash the third ball against the wall he'd say that no pro hits that hard because he'd seen pros play. When hitting against a wall he could dream and fantasize, as many do when they hit against a wall.
 

Fairhit

Hall of Fame
People who have very little tennis experience seriously underestimate the amount of effort needed to become a good player

Yes, if you are pretty athletic you can quickly rise through the lower and intermediate levels of rec tennis. But you aren't going to go beyond 5.0 if you start as an adult.
Dunning-Kruger.
 

Mongolmike

Hall of Fame
Like NY said, guys who don't believe a girl or a junior could beat them, or guys who think they could give pro ladies a good match.

Also, pickleballers who get indignant when you tease them about how easy their sport is to jump into compared to tennis.
 

dlam

Semi-Pro
Nothing wrong with fantasizing we are pros I think we were all delusional when we picked up tennis or any sport. For me when I entered tournaments and play against our provincial open champion it brought reality to my game.
What worse is golf. I played with golfer who never played tournaments just recreational golf and don’t realize how good pros are. They play a few holes under par from the shorter tees but don’t realize they have to consist and can do that for 72 holes in a four day tournament from pro tees length
 
I have an entry for the list. I was captain of a Men's 3.0 40+ team last Winter out of a country club. I am not a member of said club, but that's not a requirement. I get a call from staff about 3 weeks prior to the season starting about a new player who is a club member who would like to join the team. We are obligated to accept members and I could use an extra guy or two. I arrange for him to come out to practice.

New guy is mid-50s, played TE in college and says he's played tennis periodically since he was in high school. He had the racquet to prove it too--a Prince 90 sq. in from about 1988. He was big and buffed with a shaved head and a 'roid hyper jock intensity.

I decide I should play a practice set with the new guy to see how he plays. He played like someone who hasn't really played since high school. What stood out the most was that he had absolutely no idea how to hit a volley. He stood up on top of the net and tried to hit volleys like he was swatting a fly--hitting directly down on the ball. Not a great strategy. Half the time he missed completely. He hit the net with his racquet 3 times in one set. He didn't realize that was an automatic loss of point. I told him he would have to work on his net play. Also noticed a lot of framed shots due to the 90 sq. in head. After the match, I told him he should upgrade his racquet to something more modern. I gave him directions to the nearest tennis shop and told him he needed to upgrade.

For the next few practices, he was unavailable because he had to watch the college football playoffs and championships, because, you know, he played college football back in the 90s and he might know one of the Harbaughs.

I didn't play him the first match because he had only been to the one practice. He grumbled a little. We lost the team match to a team we should have beat because my partner tore his Achilles (that guy was also a brand new player/member playing his very first USTA match--felt terrible for him).

Didn't play new guy the second match because we caught the first loss and needed a win. More grumbling. I explained that we're playing "best available" players while we still have a chance to finish top 2 and make districts. He didn't like this because surely he was one of the "best available."

He finally showed up for our pro clinic and the pro assessed him as a 2.5. Pro asked me why I was playing him the upcoming match against a 2-0 team. I said I had to because he was whining so much. Put him on D3. They lost 3-6, 4-6. He blamed his partner. What a guy.

Left him off the lineup for 4th match because now we're 1-2 and they were 3-0. If we lost this one, we were done. He was really upset then.

By this time, I've decided it's time to move on from this guy and we had an opportunity to move team to a different facility for upcoming Spring season.

The day after we made the decision, I was contacted by the facility and they told me that new guy has invoked the HOA clause for the upcoming Spring season that says if a member wants to be captain of a team, they get to be captain over a non-member. New guy, who has played a total of 1 practice, 1 clinic and 1 match is going to be the captain. He was that bitter about me not playing him every week because he thought he was the best player on the team. He texted me to gloat about how things were going to be "different" in the Spring with him as the captain. I told him, "Good luck. For a Spring team, you're going to need around 15 guys. All the guys on this team are coming with me to [new place]." Half my team had never even met the guy because he only showed up for the 1 practice, 1 clinic and 1 match. The half that did know him all thought he was a Grade A A-hole. As soon as I texted him that, he texted every single guy on the team asking them to commit to his team for the Spring. Not a single one did. They all thought he was nuts. He was able to get 1 person for his team--his 18 year old son who never played before. Needless to say, that was not enough to form a team and he never played another match.

I visited the facility last week to watch a friend play. The nice lady in the pro shop told me the new guy still lives there, but hasn't played tennis once since his ill-advised power move.
 

BBender716

Professional
I have an entry for the list. I was captain of a Men's 3.0 40+ team last Winter out of a country club. I am not a member of said club, but that's not a requirement. I get a call from staff about 3 weeks prior to the season starting about a new player who is a club member who would like to join the team. We are obligated to accept members and I could use an extra guy or two. I arrange for him to come out to practice.

New guy is mid-50s, played TE in college and says he's played tennis periodically since he was in high school. He had the racquet to prove it too--a Prince 90 sq. in from about 1988. He was big and buffed with a shaved head and a 'roid hyper jock intensity.

I decide I should play a practice set with the new guy to see how he plays. He played like someone who hasn't really played since high school. What stood out the most was that he had absolutely no idea how to hit a volley. He stood up on top of the net and tried to hit volleys like he was swatting a fly--hitting directly down on the ball. Not a great strategy. Half the time he missed completely. He hit the net with his racquet 3 times in one set. He didn't realize that was an automatic loss of point. I told him he would have to work on his net play. Also noticed a lot of framed shots due to the 90 sq. in head. After the match, I told him he should upgrade his racquet to something more modern. I gave him directions to the nearest tennis shop and told him he needed to upgrade.

For the next few practices, he was unavailable because he had to watch the college football playoffs and championships, because, you know, he played college football back in the 90s and he might know one of the Harbaughs.

I didn't play him the first match because he had only been to the one practice. He grumbled a little. We lost the team match to a team we should have beat because my partner tore his Achilles (that guy was also a brand new player/member playing his very first USTA match--felt terrible for him).

Didn't play new guy the second match because we caught the first loss and needed a win. More grumbling. I explained that we're playing "best available" players while we still have a chance to finish top 2 and make districts. He didn't like this because surely he was one of the "best available."

He finally showed up for our pro clinic and the pro assessed him as a 2.5. Pro asked me why I was playing him the upcoming match against a 2-0 team. I said I had to because he was whining so much. Put him on D3. They lost 3-6, 4-6. He blamed his partner. What a guy.

Left him off the lineup for 4th match because now we're 1-2 and they were 3-0. If we lost this one, we were done. He was really upset then.

By this time, I've decided it's time to move on from this guy and we had an opportunity to move team to a different facility for upcoming Spring season.

The day after we made the decision, I was contacted by the facility and they told me that new guy has invoked the HOA clause for the upcoming Spring season that says if a member wants to be captain of a team, they get to be captain over a non-member. New guy, who has played a total of 1 practice, 1 clinic and 1 match is going to be the captain. He was that bitter about me not playing him every week because he thought he was the best player on the team. He texted me to gloat about how things were going to be "different" in the Spring with him as the captain. I told him, "Good luck. For a Spring team, you're going to need around 15 guys. All the guys on this team are coming with me to [new place]." Half my team had never even met the guy because he only showed up for the 1 practice, 1 clinic and 1 match. The half that did know him all thought he was a Grade A A-hole. As soon as I texted him that, he texted every single guy on the team asking them to commit to his team for the Spring. Not a single one did. They all thought he was nuts. He was able to get 1 person for his team--his 18 year old son who never played before. Needless to say, that was not enough to form a team and he never played another match.

I visited the facility last week to watch a friend play. The nice lady in the pro shop told me the new guy still lives there, but hasn't played tennis once since his ill-advised power move.
Thoroughly enjoyable read-- complete with tennis heel and a just end!
 

socallefty

G.O.A.T.
I think some people think that hitting harder is a measure of tennis level rather than knowing how to win games, sets and matches. Those players are usually a bit delusional about their actual level. They think they look like pros, but below 4.5+ everyone looks bad to a spectator.
 

BBender716

Professional
any 3.5/4.0 man or woman who talks post-match advise on technique, strategy and training like they coached a US Open champion. boring.
The only time I do anything like this is with guys I play friendly matches with on a regular basis. We'll make comments on each other's game knowing we both just want feedback to improve against the more official match situations. Good to have tennis pals like that.
 

Roforot

Hall of Fame
Nice write up captain. The club sounds like a well intentioned but poorly designed bureaucracy ideal is if they had a 2,5 team for players like this guy. Or maybe allowed the head pro to vett the team. Oftentimes there is an A team and a B team from the club.
 

johnmccabe

Hall of Fame
I think some people think that hitting harder is a measure of tennis level rather than knowing how to win games, sets and matches. Those players are usually a bit delusional about their actual level. They think they look like pros, but below 4.5+ everyone looks bad to a spectator.
Most people probably started off mistaking good looking strokes producing fast ball one inch above the net cord as the best tennis. And then get the rude awakening after getting bageled by pushers walking clumsily.
 
Nice write up captain. The club sounds like a well intentioned but poorly designed bureaucracy ideal is if they had a 2,5 team for players like this guy. Or maybe allowed the head pro to vett the team. Oftentimes there is an A team and a B team from the club.
The club is well run and still popular with several Men's and Women's Teams from 2.5 W to 4.0 M and W. It was an HOA rule that the staff told me had NEVER been invoked as long as they had worked there--15 years.

We only had a single team at 3.0 level for men at that facility. We don't have any 2.5 leagues for men in our area, so any 2.5 M must play 3.0 M league or can play mixed or senior 6.0 leagues with a 3.5 partner. Honestly, I needed bodies and if this guy had been patient, he would have played in half the matches just because of overall player availability/unavailability and because I would have evened out the playing time after we were eliminated from post-season contention.
 

Roforot

Hall of Fame
The club is well run and still popular with several Men's and Women's Teams from 2.5 W to 4.0 M and W. It was an HOA rule that the staff told me had NEVER been invoked as long as they had worked there--15 years.

We only had a single team at 3.0 level for men at that facility. We don't have any 2.5 leagues for men in our area, so any 2.5 M must play 3.0 M league or can play mixed or senior 6.0 leagues with a 3.5 partner. Honestly, I needed bodies and if this guy had been patient, he would have played in half the matches just because of overall player availability/unavailability and because I would have evened out the playing time after we were eliminated from post-season contention.
well this is about delusional players... overrating his ability, thinking he had the support of the team to launch a coup... but yes if you're short on bodies, the club doesn't have the luxury of having an 'A' or a 'B' team.
 
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