I hope this isn't coming across as boasting of an over proud parent because really I am having a hard time justifying the $500 dollars a month we spend on lessons and group lessons. I know that number will only go up. So, here it is. My son just turned 7 and started playing at 2 1/2. We have gone through the progression of balls red, orange, green dot and now yellow. We are able to do full court rallies of 15 to 20 balls. He's won two 10& under tournaments. He has the technique down. Now he primarily hits with 10 and 11 year olds. Okay, now with that established my question is it really worth it? Let's run the numbers: For boys div I scholarships are extremely hard to get. So, with lessons, tournaments, travel costs etc it seems to me that a parent should expect to pay $10,000 a year or more. If we were to put that money into his college fund he could pretty much go to any college without worrying about getting a scholarship. So, here is my question to those that have a gifted kid. Is it worth it? To pre-answer some questions: Yes, he loves it. He loves the tennis channel. I've had multiple pros and other parents tell me over and over how gifted he is. He loves to compete but $10-20K a year seems ridiculous when American kids compete for such few scholarships with kids from all over the world. I just don't see the ends justifying the means.
What to do with a gifted kid
- Thread starter Opus
- Start date
Thinking about some possible payoff in the future is the wrong way to think about it. They may not even have college men's tennis in a few years.
Think about whether this is the best thing for your family. If it keeps him happy, allows him a place to achieve, and is a positive to your family bonds, that is worth a lot of money. However, if alternatives are better for your family in these areas, cut back on the expenses. Remember, especially for boys, how good a kid is at 10 or even 14 rarely translates to how good he will be at 18.
Think about whether this is the best thing for your family. If it keeps him happy, allows him a place to achieve, and is a positive to your family bonds, that is worth a lot of money. However, if alternatives are better for your family in these areas, cut back on the expenses. Remember, especially for boys, how good a kid is at 10 or even 14 rarely translates to how good he will be at 18.
I agree. Looking for a return on investment is the wrong view as it will rarely pan out - you'll spend more than college at this rate and making money as a playing pro is an ultra-long shot. Now, that's not to say that your son can't get a scholarship or be a pro - just doesn't work to think of it in terms of ROI.
As someone (as many of us are) in the throws of junior tennis, I would advise to slow down and enjoy the journey. He's only 7 and you have some years for this to pan out. Personally, I don't think it's worth it to spend a lot of money on it under 12. There are a lot of ways to feed his passion, train and get good without breaking the bank at young ages. If he's good enough and serious later, there will time for high performance (expensive) training. Just my opinion.
Mighty Matteo
Semi-Pro
i agree with you. it would be great for his athletic development to have him play multiples sports to build his athletic ability. soccer, swimming, baseball, etc.
Well, for that matter, I could make the same argument about select baseball and soccer. They both have high costs with a slim chance of getting a scholarship. My question is not whether to let him play but is it worth investing in the serious training that will ensue with his ability if you want to maximize a kid's potential. We let my son play multiple sports, not select, and even now we get pressure from the coaches of each sport that he should be exclusive to that sport. And my friends with kids my age are doing just that having their kids play only one sport and put extreme emphasis on that sport. Is that what people on this forum are doing also? I don't want my kid's whole childhood to be just tennis or just baseball.
Good points. Playing multiple sports is good for overall athletic development and also helps avoid repetitive use injury and mental burnout. My son plays basketball (maybe 25%) and some soccer (about 10%) in addition to tennis (about 65%), which helps him with movement and gives him a fun/social team sport to enjoy.
As far as costs, high performance training or travel leagues are going to have high costs, that's why I suggest waiting a few years until they start to gravitate towards something. No point in doing it at 7, IMO.
coaching32yrs
Semi-Pro
I have been down this road with multiple players and my own kids. Don't drink the Kool Aid. While no doubt your kid is talented the chances are there are 100's of others just like him. Development at age 7 does not translate to playing at a high level at 18. By all means put as much as you can in his college fund. Chances are 99.9% that is where his future is, not pro tennis.
t135
Professional
You don't have kids playing sports to get a college scholarship. They do it for the broad range of intangible benefits that make them happy, healthy people ready to tackle life as they did the game of tennis when they become adults. College scholarships or a chance to play professionally etc are just a happy side effect of all the other stuff. Nothing wrong with hard work and investing money but the return you look for is a well developed person at the end of the day.
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gplracer
Hall of Fame
Lots of good suggestions here. No reason at the age to play one sport. I think coaches suggesting that are wrong. My friend beat Robbie Ginepri in the finals of the 10s qualifying for southerns. Now he is teaching college tennis. Another kid from our club used to beat Melanie Oudin in the juniors. She played college tennis for Virgina. You just do not know how they will do later. They have to have luck, the right coaching, athletic ability, size, and determination to do it. At the younger ages man small fast players do well. They beat the bigger slower players. Sometimes those bigger slower kids grow into their bodies and get faster.
"Gifted" at 7 means nothing. Back before I was 10, coaches thought I had the potential to be a d1 soccer player because I was so much better than the other kids my age. Guess what? I dropped soccer at 16 because I wasn't good enough anymore, and didn't love the sport like i had in the past.
Don't waste thousands of dollars now for an unlikely event. Plus, like others have said, paying for his development in an attempt to get a college scholarship is the wrong reason. He won't be going to college for another decade. That's a long time, and a lot can change. Let him grow and play a variety of sports, and see where he's at when he's 12-13. Is he still far ahead of others his age, or was he just an early bloomer?
Don't waste thousands of dollars now for an unlikely event. Plus, like others have said, paying for his development in an attempt to get a college scholarship is the wrong reason. He won't be going to college for another decade. That's a long time, and a lot can change. Let him grow and play a variety of sports, and see where he's at when he's 12-13. Is he still far ahead of others his age, or was he just an early bloomer?
I think it is wonderful your son loves tennis and enjoys playing it. Plus he is good at it, and that is wonderful. It does cost a lot of money, but no parent is truly paying for it for a scholarship at that age. Later many parents hope for a pro career and then the cost of a coach, lessons, tournies gets insane. Let him play if he loves it and if you can afford it. I know many parents who have their 7,8 year olds do tennis five times a week, two hours or more in hopes of this or that. Then they compete by 8 in 10s, compete by 9, 10 in 12s and do great, some are at a different tournament every weekend. Once a watched a 10 year old throw up during the match(he was winning it) mom sat there, kid went on to play and win. That kid is now to be a fifth grader and playing all over the county. Might work for them, but if people recommend you that I would say no. Not that young. Compare it to the kids doing soccer, swimming, gymnastics, ice skating, those cost as well, maybe not as much, and most parents are not dreaming of Olympics just yet, but doing it for the overall well being of their child and to avoid couch potato/overweight kids. As long as it is fun, have him play, but be very careful not to overburden your young child. Just my thoughts, always go with what you think is best for you child and family.
All great points! Thank you. But let me refine my question. Take any kid that, say, is noticeably gifted. Here is what I am asking. Obviously, the child will have immense success if you keep him at the local, rec league level and keep the love of the game. But, if you want to face tougher competition and better instruction is it worth the investment. Thus, do you maximize the child's potential whether it be tennis, piano or whatever or do you let them have a normal childhood not over emphasizing any one particular sport? I grew up playing four sports without specialized instruction but very few people seem to be doing that anymore. I guess I'm sounding cheap, sticker shocked at the costs of junior athletics but wow 20-30k a year! Ugh!
chalkflewup
Hall of Fame
I don't a see a problem playing just one sport competitively. My kid still likes to play basketball, golf, throw a football, etc... just for fun. I just wouldn't suggest taking out a 2nd mortgage because a 7 year old is beating 10 year olds. It happens in every section all over the country.
gplracer
Hall of Fame
It is the rare kid that continues to do this all the way through the juniors. Granted it does happen. We had a boy at our club that is blooming as a college player. He has always been good but he never even got into the southern championships until he was in the 18s. Now he is 6'5". No one would have predicted how good he is gotten. I bet the people that beat him when he was younger thought they would be the ones.
fire_eaters
New User
Look into if he could get a scholarship to the bolletari academy for high school. If he could get into there his game would be great, and pretty much be a lock for a D1 scholarship
gplracer
Hall of Fame
My son just turned 10 and we pretty much have given up on other sports. He wants to play tennis all the time. I do think the sports he played earlier have made him more well rounded. If he had played more he would probably be even better. He is almost 5'2" and he just turned 10 three weeks ago. He already has a mens size 9 shoe! The more opportunity we have to hide exercise in other sports the better!
You will get many different answers as this question comes down to personal choice. We went all in with the gifted player and it turned out great, top 10, to a top school (but with a great amount of stress all along as well, ask any parent raising a top athlete - it ain't easy). Some may go down the same path and have total regret, I certainly know those parents - they don't like the sacrifices made for tennis, time wise or academically. There are so many things you can't control trying to be successful no matter how much money you have or don't have, so only you can decide if risk/$ is worth it. Really depends on what you want to spend your money and time on. Our D1 basketball player works like our tennis player. I will say, the other kids we have that just focus on academics with general interests have a really nice balanced life. But every kid is different, even in the same family.
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chalkflewup
Hall of Fame
^^^
Well said treeman.
Well said treeman.
barringer97
Semi-Pro
Damn that's a good point. Men's tennis is usually the first to go.
Totally forgot about that.
carnaval09
Rookie
It cost "X" amount of money to raise a child.
Most parents want them to do good. Of course, this means different things to different people.
Tennis is a lot like life. Are "YOU" willing to do what is best for the child?
This doesn't mean tennis, it means in everything?
So, get a lot of parenting books and read them all more than 5 times.
Good Luck......
Most parents want them to do good. Of course, this means different things to different people.
Tennis is a lot like life. Are "YOU" willing to do what is best for the child?
This doesn't mean tennis, it means in everything?
So, get a lot of parenting books and read them all more than 5 times.
Good Luck......
floridatennisdude
Hall of Fame
Having a gifted child in any walk of life isn't cheap if the goal is to display their talents to a wide audience. I think it all comes down to the size of audience desired. If the family wants the world to see their kid, it can easily cost $100k+ to travel the world in that pursuit.
It's all about marketing. Look at the money P&G is pouring into Olympic advertising in an effort to sell toothpaste and soap. It's a lot of dough, but everyone in the country knows their brands when they shop at the grocery store. Thus, their goal is accomplished.
It's all about marketing. Look at the money P&G is pouring into Olympic advertising in an effort to sell toothpaste and soap. It's a lot of dough, but everyone in the country knows their brands when they shop at the grocery store. Thus, their goal is accomplished.
coaching32yrs
Semi-Pro
Opus- you have received a lot of good advice here. But it sounds to me like you have drank the Kool Aid and are going "all in" on a 7 year old. Good luck on your journey. I'll be where the "real" tennis is this weekend. USTA Adult League District Champioships. Men and women competing as hard as their body and spirit will allow for nothing but the love of the game. No money, no scholarships, no ranking points, no glory.
Opus- I have a different take for you.
You started your son tennis at 2 1/2 and now with 4 1/2 yr of tennis, he is dominating the 10 yr olds. Keep in mind many kids do not even start their lessons at 7 yet. You must have a big plan for him to start tennis so young. I only saw pro tennis doing that because it is free teaching their own kids. I can tell you $500/month for lessons at age 7 is more than average parents are spending. Adding tournaments and travelling soon, your cost will be phenominal.
I suggest you evaluate your son's long term goal and adjust. If you think your child is gifted to be an ATP top 100 then get a genuine evaluation from a top developmental coach like Rick Macci or Nick Bolleteiri. You should be getting a scholaship or a deep discount offering or either a wake up call and slow down on spending. Remember tennis developmental phase expands several years and most parents are footing the bill initially. You started him very young so he has an edge. You prob already spent significantly and now questioning if it will be worth it.
If you cannot bring him there, send a video to those coaches. Make a special request and pay for their time to look at it.
GA tennis, one of the regular posters here brought his daughter to Macci and got a pretty genuine critic on what will prevent her from a pro potential.
BTW, $10,000/yr starting age 10 to train for a D1 men's scholarship is not a good ROI. Most men's receive partial. Although pride and joy in tennis is priceless, you can achieve that spending less.
You started your son tennis at 2 1/2 and now with 4 1/2 yr of tennis, he is dominating the 10 yr olds. Keep in mind many kids do not even start their lessons at 7 yet. You must have a big plan for him to start tennis so young. I only saw pro tennis doing that because it is free teaching their own kids. I can tell you $500/month for lessons at age 7 is more than average parents are spending. Adding tournaments and travelling soon, your cost will be phenominal.
I suggest you evaluate your son's long term goal and adjust. If you think your child is gifted to be an ATP top 100 then get a genuine evaluation from a top developmental coach like Rick Macci or Nick Bolleteiri. You should be getting a scholaship or a deep discount offering or either a wake up call and slow down on spending. Remember tennis developmental phase expands several years and most parents are footing the bill initially. You started him very young so he has an edge. You prob already spent significantly and now questioning if it will be worth it.
If you cannot bring him there, send a video to those coaches. Make a special request and pay for their time to look at it.
GA tennis, one of the regular posters here brought his daughter to Macci and got a pretty genuine critic on what will prevent her from a pro potential.
BTW, $10,000/yr starting age 10 to train for a D1 men's scholarship is not a good ROI. Most men's receive partial. Although pride and joy in tennis is priceless, you can achieve that spending less.
NetNinja68
Rookie
I am in the exact same position as you except with a 7 yr old girl and deliberate over this conundrum quite a bit especially when she has a bad practice. This question is a valid one if you are not rolling in expendable income.
gplracer
Hall of Fame
Here is some depressing news when evaluating how gifted your child is. My friend played in the same section as Andre Agassi when he was growing up. My friend was in the 14s when Agassi was 10. His other friend was the #1 12 year old in Montana. He played Agassi (who was 10) in the sectional tournament and lost 6-0, 6-0 in 30 mins. Agassi then went through the entire 12 and under sectional draw beating EVERYONE 6-0, 6-0 when he was only 10 years old.
How is your child gifted? Have you had his/her hand/eye coordination tested to see what percentile he/she is in from the general public? Or does your child meet one of the following things:
There are some things to think about:
1. Does your child win because he is bigger than everyone else?
2. Does your child win because he has gotten more quality instruction than anyone else?
3. Does your child win because he plays more tennis than everyone else his age?
Your child maybe gifted or he may win more because of one of the above factors. Gifted children have something that others do not have. It maybe speed or hand/eye coordination that is off the chart. It makes them different that everyone else their age.
For the rest of the kids eventually other players will play as much as them, get as much instruction as them, and be the same size as them. Then winning becomes a lot harder. I am not trying say your child is not gifted. He/she may be gifted. My child tested in the 99 percentile for hand/eye coordination, is in the 99th percentile for height and can touch his elbows behind is back so his flexibility is different from the rest of us. He was #2 in the 10s in our state by his 8th birthday, but I am not sure he is gifted. All I know for sure is that he loves to play tennis and we want to keep doing things to encourage that love. He plays a lot of tennis and we hope that he is not burned out when he gets older. He might just be doing real well because he has had lots of quality instruction, moves well for his size, and plays more tennis than the average just turned 10 year old.
How is your child gifted? Have you had his/her hand/eye coordination tested to see what percentile he/she is in from the general public? Or does your child meet one of the following things:
There are some things to think about:
1. Does your child win because he is bigger than everyone else?
2. Does your child win because he has gotten more quality instruction than anyone else?
3. Does your child win because he plays more tennis than everyone else his age?
Your child maybe gifted or he may win more because of one of the above factors. Gifted children have something that others do not have. It maybe speed or hand/eye coordination that is off the chart. It makes them different that everyone else their age.
For the rest of the kids eventually other players will play as much as them, get as much instruction as them, and be the same size as them. Then winning becomes a lot harder. I am not trying say your child is not gifted. He/she may be gifted. My child tested in the 99 percentile for hand/eye coordination, is in the 99th percentile for height and can touch his elbows behind is back so his flexibility is different from the rest of us. He was #2 in the 10s in our state by his 8th birthday, but I am not sure he is gifted. All I know for sure is that he loves to play tennis and we want to keep doing things to encourage that love. He plays a lot of tennis and we hope that he is not burned out when he gets older. He might just be doing real well because he has had lots of quality instruction, moves well for his size, and plays more tennis than the average just turned 10 year old.
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coach32yrs. I've already drank the cool-aid? If I had done that I wouldn't be asking this question on this forum. Just to show you how wrong you are, I'm a baseball guy. My son started playing at 2/1/2 because my wife was playing TCD and the woman watching him took a couple of the kids to hit on a far away ct. and he picked it up asap. Changing the subject to baseball, something I know much more about. You take any little league group from t-ball to the 14u and out of the couple hundred kids that play, there is maybe one or two players that standout and they are a cut above the rest. The other parents know it, the other kids know it. So, the parent of that child can either get the child a position/hitting coach, send him to summer camps, and put him on a select team that plays 40/52 weekends a year. All this is at a significant cost though. Or the parent can the child in rec league and let him dominate that against lesser competition. As for tennis and spending $500 a month here is the breakdown. 4 private lessons a month at 65/hr=260.00 two days a week/8 days a month of group clinics at 30/day=240 thus 500 a month/6000 a year. That is playing 3 days a week. Now coach32yrs these kids you are extolling as only playing for the love of the game with no scholarships hopes in sight, where did they get their training? Just against a backboard? Just hitting around with friends? Or did they get subsidized training? The premise of my original question was, to those that had a gifted kid/student, what should a parent do? Because the costs for quality and intense training seem to be out of control. The cool-aid I'm drinking is, no, it's worth 20-30k a year.
gplracer
Hall of Fame
Opus, my post was not meant to be negative. Someone has to make it. Heck I have two kids each are doing 1 private lesson a week. Just know that for now you play for the love of the game. I love the weekends spent at tennis tournaments with my kids. I will miss it when they get older and no longer play junior tennis.
gplracer, great post! Yes we have had him tested and he is in the 98th percentile for hand/eye. He is average on height but very fast. We are a very athletic family and do not let him play video games so he is very active. I don't know if he plays more than other kids his age, good question. Three days a week is the max we will let him play in either baseball or tennis. But what I have noticed in 10 and under tennis now is it seems (don't take this wrong) like there are a lot of kids that didn't make it in baseball and soccer and now are trying tennis. Just from how they appear coordination wise on the court. So, the competition thus far hasn't been good enough for me to say one way or the other. Instruction-he has been taking lessons for the past year so he probably is ahead of most 7 year olds unless they come from a tennis family. So, it sounds like you are in a similar situation but a couple years ahead of me. What are your training plans and costs?
floridatennisdude
Hall of Fame
You shouldn't have to wait til he is 14. If he is 9-10 and winning in 12 section tourneys, you'll know if it is a gift or just a head start.
OP, I like your style. Good luck!
my point was to wait until 14 to make the decision to dump more money into it or not. Otherwise you can save a bit of money from 7-14. im just generalizing..btw.
ps... i would never take the chance and spend 10-20k a year on a 7-13 yearold. nope...but thats my opinion.
WARPWOODIE
Rookie
Just hone it and run with it and see where it takes you in 2-3 years....but, I want to stress, there are no guarantee's. If your kid is on track with the "elite" players, you'll see what your developing product will look like by around 14. Most elite players are blue chips by that time and are playing national events, and are being chosen to participate in various USTA player development programs or zonal teams. By honing it, I mean get him with a good development coach right now especially if you have the financial means. Network with other parents who have kids on the same path who can provide you with some guidance from experience. Good luck on your journey!
This is really a good question because you are asking while your son is age 7......
When the fact is for most parents, the truth dawns on them much later about the scholarship money,
and they feel resentful. You seem to know the answer already.
On a bigger picture, no one on this board knows how college tennis is going to change or what it will look like in the future....
I went to two state schools in two different states..
Today, one state school has an all foreign men's tennis team,
and in my current state, the university has a women's tennis team, and no men's tennis team.
Will the USTA exert influence on the NCAA and will foreigners be capped to two a team in the near future? Probably not. So, most likely, the foreign numbers will expand. Maybe, Johnny will make the team, I doubt he is going to get any $ though.
In regards to other concerns:
1) Success at age 7 doesn't always translate into success at age 18.
2) Many kids get burnt out playing a sport for all those years.
3) Many kids get injuries from repetitive use.
You say you're a baseball guy, so you would know about the kids who now pitch all year, and the subsequent surgery they will face.
4) The money that you are spending now, $6,000 for a 7 year old seems very high for the year.
It will only get higher if he starts to compete. I would save the money for later.
I would try to find some creative ways to spend less money.
Maybe, an uncle can hit with him? Older brother?
5) It is a long journey.
Not so much fun when you are on the court by yourself, and you are not winning and that will happen to him as the other kids catch up....... And they will.
I would try to keep him around team sports until age 12 or 13, so he plays tennis from now until 12 and also a team sport too. At age 12 or 13, he can switch full time to tennis if he so desires.
Good luck.
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Baseball is worse and more expensive. Look up the number of 11 and 12 year old kids that are having Tommy John's surgery. It's scary. Select league coaches, if they get a stud pitcher, they pitch him all the way to Tommy John's surgery. That's because select league coaches get paid by parents that want their kids to be on winning teams. The coach hopes the superstar kid will mask the truth that the child could get just as good of training from many other select league coaches but parents generally seek out the coaches that win the most. If they don't win they do not get parents to pay their salaries. They are supposed to monitor pitch counts but overall coaches push the limits on it all the time. The result is a lot of collegiate/minor league pitchers are former outfielders with strong arms because pitchers from the juniors arms are all fried. Thus, even though I have coached baseball before, I will not let my son play select ball. I know performance pre-12 years old does not indicate future success but on the other hand a friend of mine grew up with Marc Bulger, former St. Louis Rams qb, and he said Marc stood out from the first grade on. The difference is football/basketball are low costs sports. Tennis/baseball/skating/soccer(select) are very high costs if you want your child to get proper instruction. The information I am seeking is from others who have been in this spot and what they did and what they spent and how they went about it.
There have several great posts, thank you!.
There have several great posts, thank you!.
coaching32yrs
Semi-Pro
Sorry Opus. Not my intent to insult. My antennae goes up when I hear a parent use the words gifted, training expenses, and scholarships for a 7 year old. I have been in the tennis game a long time. In my experience success at this age just doesn't translate into success later on. What other parents say is not relevant. Many coaches say the wrong thing also. I have had players at the highest level. I never use the word gifted around my players. Just my opinion, but I think it says all the wrong things.
WARPWOODIE
Rookie
Coach, I totally agree with you. I recall a girl named Monique Viele in the 90's and as recently, Jan Silva....promising juniors whose games never really met the expectations that was thrust upon them.
Tennishacker
Professional
To truly know if your child is gifted, send him to Nick B./IMG, if they offer him a contract, then you know child is truly gifted.
I probably should have started this thread as conceptual vs personal but it would be nice if someone started up a new thread about psycho parents. I coached baseball, part time, for ten years and I saw my share of psycho dads out there. One kid in particular, and bless his heart he did not have an athletic bone in his body, struck out with the bases loaded, two outs and the game on the line. His father came on the field screaming at his kid for not swinging, another parent yelled at me for having the "loser" kid in the lineup in the first place. The child left the field crying while the two obese coach potato dads kept yelling both at me and the kid. As far as I know that was the last baseball game that child played as he didn't sign up for our team the next season. I have yet to experience what the parents are like for tournament tennis but I was hoping that it would be a more sophisticated group of people than what I experienced in baseball.
As for goals/payoff there seems to be some backlash here as if it were a selfish motivation. Let me restate it then. I've never met a successful person that wasn't goal oriented. Whether one reaches that goal or not is not as important as the value that is gained from setting up the steps and the mechanizations that it takes to reach those goals.
As for goals/payoff there seems to be some backlash here as if it were a selfish motivation. Let me restate it then. I've never met a successful person that wasn't goal oriented. Whether one reaches that goal or not is not as important as the value that is gained from setting up the steps and the mechanizations that it takes to reach those goals.
