What Your Rating Means

Discussion in 'Adult League & Tournament Talk' started by larry10s, Dec 29, 2009.

  1. larry10s

    larry10s Hall of Fame

    Apr 4, 2008
    this was posted along time ago . i do not who to give credit to
    Some people may be confused with the USTA league ratings (1.0 to 7.0) so here is the unofficial guide.

    1.0 - You stink. Your grabbing the wrong end of the racquet and you

    think the green fuzz on the ball has something to do with velcro.

    1.5 - You still stink, but you can tie your own tennis shoes and hit a

    ball you have got in your hand towards one of the cardinal points

    without hitting yourself in the leg.

    2.0 - You have taken a few lessons, and the odour is fading. Your strokes

    begin to look less like a grandmother waving a flyswatter at a moth

    and more like you are actually trying to accomplish something.

    2.5 - This is when you start going to the club round robins, and

    discover that despite your previous misconceptions, you still stink.

    You are doing alright if you are fed the ball, but everyone else is

    really just being nice to you until they can win the point without

    embarrasing you.

    3.0 - Same as 2.5, but with more topspin.

    3.5 - The light is dawning. Your feet begin to move more efficiently.

    They do not remain glued to the baseline, but begin to move

    around the court, even up to the net on those occasions that you

    feel like walking back to the fence to pick up the ball that passed


    4.0 - Your discovery of how to hit a serve and overhead allows you

    to be one of the people politely destroying 2.5 players on

    round robin night.

    4.5 - The ball goes where you will it to go, with authoritative pace

    and spin. You are king. You are undefeated on Round Robin night,

    and wish test your mettle with a greater challenge. You ask

    to play a match with your club's top players and after getting

    your ass whupped that, in fact, you stink. "But", the Div 1 team

    says magnanimously, "You are getting better."

    5.0 - Around now, pretty much everyone else at your club stinks.

    League play is the only way to get a decent match, and you're

    starting to think pretty well of yourself.

    5.5 - You crush some 5.0 punk in a league match, and tell him

    he stinks.

    6.0 - Tennis scholarship. You go to Stanford, play for the university

    team, and have some sixteen year old prodigy bagels you in

    a practice set and tells you you stink.

    6.5 - You are offered a berth in a local ATP qualifier, and lose out

    in the pre-draw round robin stage. One of the people in the

    audience played tennis with you back in round robin, and he

    tells you that you looked pretty good out there, but your

    backhand still stinks.

    7.0 - The pro level. You got to this level by yelling at referees, match fixing or taking drugs.

    (I found this online, I don't know who to give credit to but very funny.)
  2. ALten1

    ALten1 Rookie

    Dec 24, 2009
    I would say that ranking list is somewhat accurate (overlook that im only a 3.5) and in fact I am now feeling better about just where I should be ranked. For instance, the computers say I'm a 3.5 right -- but I am a staple at the methadone clinic and I will argue with a stop sign (momma said), so thats two 7.0 traits. Now to use the 4 pre-algerbra classes I took in high school in the late 80's I can see why its hard for me to find a team.
  3. r2473

    r2473 G.O.A.T.

    Aug 14, 2006
    Credit goes to "Hitchhiker"
  4. JavierLW

    JavierLW Hall of Fame

    Apr 29, 2007
    I think there is a 8.0 as well. The difference between 6.0 and 7.0 used to be that you made money playing as a 7.0, but I think they've since added something for 8.0.

    (which doesnt really make sense to me because once you get past 5.5 it's not really a skill rating anymore and it's pretty much not important....)
  5. Kick_It

    Kick_It Semi-Pro

    Dec 27, 2005
    By that standard - I was 2.0 levels higher 23 years ago than I am now - I suppose that means many more people can tell me "I stink" now ;-)

    My favorites are the ones who weren't born when I was in my prime, yet tell me I stink ;-)

    A has-been if I ever was one, K_I

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