Am I right or am I wrong?

[Z-Man]

If the leash is this tight now, you're going to be in leg irons later. Don't feel bad--it happens to everyone. Maybe she's just feeling insecure about the relationship? If this thing is long-term, let her know you're 100% committed, but stand your ground early. Marriage is like The Somme--a battle of inches.

 

[Bud]

^^^^^

Finally, this thread start to get interesting...

 

[CanadianChic]

If the leash is this tight now, you're going to be in leg irons later.

Come on, make your own thread bud. This one is about Magician's dilemma (while secretly yearning for a new lady) not your bedroom antics. :twisted:

 

[Cindysphinx]

Here, let me help.

OP will come back and say that he asked the question about dating black women during the "off" part of this 18-month "on-again, off-again" relationship. See, that explains everything!

You're welcome, man.

 

[RD 7]

she likes to analyze this and analyze that: why did you say that? why did you do that? Im not like that at all.

Well...she is really attractive though...

Maybe she senses that you're not fully in this thing.

Have you considered asking for a downgrade, something without all the chit chat?

 

[UsualSuspect]

Do whatever you want and whatever that makes you happy. It is important to live your life the way you want to, not how someone else, like your nagging girlfriend, wants you to. You should hit it and leave it bro.

 

[maverick66]

Here, let me help.

OP will come back and say that he asked the question about dating black women during the "off" part of this 18-month "on-again, off-again" relationship. See, that explains everything!

You're welcome, man.

Maybe his GF is black and he was looking for other women because he wanted to move? Or maybe he is lying through his teeth was bored and made this thread. Either way i dont care. It took me 2 mins to type my part of this. If he lied he robbed me of 2 mins that could have spent reading other pointless threads.

 

[crystal_clear]

I am taking EQ course Building Emotional Intelligence: Managing Emotions (I).

The girlfriend’s anger emotion (secondary emotion) reveals her primary emotion: lonely, disappointed, sad, insecure, unloved…OP should understand this behind scenes then talk to her to seek a solution.

 

[TheMagicianOfPrecision]

To answer some of your questions: Yes, i was the one who created the thread about being offered jobs in USA and where to date black women (while being in this relationship). Im not saying im perfect but i dont consider creating a thread on an Internet-forum to be cheating, i havent been with another woman for 18 months and as ive said before have no intensions of doing that either.
My offer working in USA still stands, and i still like black women.
If i wrote that i was single in that other thread i guess that was because i actually just wanted straight up answers about my question, not moral-preaches about whats wrong and whats right.
If i ever move to USA i will definetely end this relationship.
My gf has a black dad and white mother.
So...thats how it goes.

Im sorry if i disappointed some of you that was expecting a big controversy, bringing out the popcorn-bowls and everything !

 

[TheMagicianOfPrecision]

ok, at least you have the huevos to stand up and answer honestly. Kudos to you.

Now hopefully J011y will take a lesson from your example and do the same.

Huevos=Balls ?
Thank you
The only thing he will ever "take" is a new identity

 

[Bud]

tick tock... :mrgreen:

 

[CaptainInsano]

To answer some of your questions: Yes, i was the one who created the thread about being offered jobs in USA and where to date black women (while being in this relationship). Im not saying im perfect but i dont consider creating a thread on an Internet-forum to be cheating, i havent been with another woman for 18 months and as ive said before have no intensions of doing that either.
My offer working in USA still stands, and i still like black women.
If i wrote that i was single in that other thread i guess that was because i actually just wanted straight up answers about my question, not moral-preaches about whats wrong and whats right.
If i ever move to USA i will definetely end this relationship.
My gf has a black dad and white mother.
So...thats how it goes.

Im sorry if i disappointed some of you that was expecting a big controversy, bringing out the popcorn-bowls and everything !

Sorry bud, that's disonhest to your gf. Reading this I hear that you're not really committed to this relationship (ready to end the relationship if you get the job? Have you talked to her about the possibility and how you can arrange something?). Perhaps this kind of thinking is seen by her through other behaviours and actions and it bursted out when you cancelled the plans Friday night (still, in my opinion, for a good reason).

Like CanadianChic said, we're hearing one side of the story but it doesn't sound very balanced. There might be other things in the equation....

 

[LolzWhat?]

1. Negotiate by talking
if that doesn't work you can resort to violent methods of persuasion.

 

[Cindysphinx]

Oh, I thought this was a serious relationship, but apparently that is not the case.

In that case, my advice still stands. Do whatever you want. It's not a serious relationship and you have nothing invested in it. If she gets mad and leaves, whatever. In fact, you'll be doing her a favor because she will bolt awake and smell the coffee more acutely if you aren't nice and will stop wasting her time trying to guilt you into not breaking a date.

 

[TheMagicianOfPrecision]

Oh, I thought this was a serious relationship, but apparently that is not the case.

In that case, my advice still stands. Do whatever you want. It's not a serious relationship and you have nothing invested in it. If she gets mad and leaves, whatever. In fact, you'll be doing her a favor because she will bolt awake and smell the coffee more acutely if you aren't nice and will stop wasting her time trying to guilt you into not breaking a date.

As i said, im not perfect , far from it.

 

[TheMagicianOfPrecision]

Single again...the weekend was a mess and we decided to break up...:-?

Oh well, life goes on...

 

[jrod]

Single again...the weekend was a mess and we decided to break up...:-?

Oh well, life goes on...

ok, somehow I think this outcome was highly predictable. I mean, based on everything you've said about your relationship pointed to where you are now. Be glad you didn't waste any more time than you did getting here. Hopefully, you learn from this...

 

[TheMagicianOfPrecision]

ok, somehow I think this outcome was highly predictable. I mean, based on everything you've said about your relationship pointed to where you are now. Be glad you didn't waste any more time than you did getting here. Hopefully, you learn from this...

I was probably the only one who didnt see this coming...But it feels pretty good actually.
Yes, hopefully.

 

[jrod]

^^^ Damn near forgot to ask....did you ever get to see your old buddy?

 

[atatu]

Give her a Henning Mankall novel, she'll get so into it that she'll just want to stay home and read and you won't have any trouble getting away to see your buddy...

 

[TheMagicianOfPrecision]

^^^ Damn near forgot to ask....did you ever get to see your old buddy?

Yes I did! We hung out for a couple of hours last Friday, talked about the old days and had a few beers, it was a great night
Thanx for asking

 

[jrod]

Yes I did! We hung out for a couple of hours last Friday, talked about the old days and had a few beers, it was a great night
Thanx for asking

Well, at least there was something to salvage from the weekend then. For a minute there, I thought you told your buddy you couldn't make it and instead spent the entire weekend arguing with your (ex)girlfriend.

I'd say you made the right choice.

 

[DownTheLine]

Show us pictures of your girlfriend, then we will decide.

 

[TheMagicianOfPrecision]

Well, at least there was something to salvage from the weekend then. For a minute there, I thought you told your buddy you couldn't make it and instead spent the entire weekend arguing with your (ex)girlfriend.

I'd say you made the right choice.

I decided she has no rights telling me what to do or not to do since i would never ever do that! And we just couldnt agree on anything in the end...
Yes i think i did, thanx.

 

[TheMagicianOfPrecision]

Show us pictures of your girlfriend, then we will decide.

For some reason i dont think she would appreciate that.

 

[JRstriker12]

I decided she has no rights telling me what to do or not to do since i would never ever do that! And we just couldnt agree on anything in the end...
Yes i think i did, thanx.

Sorry to hear that you two couldn't work it out....

It's usually for the best though. Keep this experience as a lesson learned when dealing with your next relationship.

 

[TheMagicianOfPrecision]

Sorry to hear that you two couldn't work it out....

It's usually for the best though. Keep this experience as a lesson learned when dealing with your next relationship.

Yeah ,thats alright though.
Ill try to do that, when it comes to relationships one never learns, at least not I.
This far...

 

[mucat]

Well, at least there was something to salvage from the weekend then. For a minute there, I thought you told your buddy you couldn't make it and instead spent the entire weekend arguing with your (ex)girlfriend.

I'd say you made the right choice.

I wouldn't put it this way. Met up with old buddy and ditched a problematic gf in one weekend? It is a win win win situation. Great weekend. Now you are wiser and free (to date again).

 

[mozzer]

Bros over Hoes!

 

[TheMagicianOfPrecision]

Bros over Hoes!

Yeah, thats one way of putting it