i love t3nn1s
Banned
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NEED QUICK REPLIES....(help talking to girls..)
- Thread starter i love t3nn1s
- Start date
Swissv2
Hall of Fame
You cannot force a girl to have a "long conversation" with you, or she will close up quickly. When you talk with her, try to keep your discussion open ended and let her give her 2 cents about it. If she wants to talk, she definately will. If she doesn't, then don't worry about it. Most of all, when she is comfortable about talking with you, then pay attention: there will be clues to what she is interested in talking about.
i love t3nn1s
Banned
thnx for the quick replies
ananda
Semi-Pro
haha, you'll soon be wishing she would stop talking.
seriously, ask her questions. what she's interested in. her childhood, hobbies, friends etc. what music she likes, what movies, book etc.
then (occassionally) tell her about your favorite movies/books/ etc.
i think you should also learn to spend quiet time with each other. one day you will reach that stage when you know everything there is to know about each other.
seriously, ask her questions. what she's interested in. her childhood, hobbies, friends etc. what music she likes, what movies, book etc.
then (occassionally) tell her about your favorite movies/books/ etc.
i think you should also learn to spend quiet time with each other. one day you will reach that stage when you know everything there is to know about each other.
I find it helpful to plan out, and label conversations with the time. It will help, the next time you see your girlfriend, if you meet on the hour for this plan, 11am will save you any trouble at all.
11am: Hello girlfriend, it is 11am. At this time, I thought we could talk about your favourite colour. What is it?
GF: I like the colour [is interrupted]
11:02: Doesn't matter, it's now 11:02am. It's time for me to serenade you. By that, I mean I will sing in wonderful tones to you until [interrupts self]
11:04: Sheesh, it's now time to talk about cramps. Do you get them? Are they bad? Does a hot water bottle or chocolate help? I'll need to know, as I'm really caring [whoops]
11:06: Whoops, there goes another two minutes. The other day you were telling me about your almost-dead grandmother. So, how is she?
GF: Kinda sweet that you asked, she's [ding ding]
11:08: Doesn't matter, we need move on to to your stance (wow, what a cool coincidence) on burial vs. cremation. When the old bird dies, which do you think for her?....
There, you see? OrangeOne's 2-minute rule for conversation success. You'll have her making out with you by 12:46 (if only to shut you up).
11am: Hello girlfriend, it is 11am. At this time, I thought we could talk about your favourite colour. What is it?
GF: I like the colour [is interrupted]
11:02: Doesn't matter, it's now 11:02am. It's time for me to serenade you. By that, I mean I will sing in wonderful tones to you until [interrupts self]
11:04: Sheesh, it's now time to talk about cramps. Do you get them? Are they bad? Does a hot water bottle or chocolate help? I'll need to know, as I'm really caring [whoops]
11:06: Whoops, there goes another two minutes. The other day you were telling me about your almost-dead grandmother. So, how is she?
GF: Kinda sweet that you asked, she's [ding ding]
11:08: Doesn't matter, we need move on to to your stance (wow, what a cool coincidence) on burial vs. cremation. When the old bird dies, which do you think for her?....
There, you see? OrangeOne's 2-minute rule for conversation success. You'll have her making out with you by 12:46 (if only to shut you up).
i love t3nn1s
Banned
hey ananda...if i ask those stuff.,...duznt it kinda sound like an interview or soemthing???? lol
TheShaun
Hall of Fame
how did she ever become your girlfriend without talking to her about those things?
Swissv2
Hall of Fame
It would sound like an interview only if you asked every single one of these questions in a short span of time!
When you ask her a question, let the conversation grow out of that one topic.
isuk@tennis
Rookie
what if she doesn't stop talking even when the answers i give her are "oh", "that sucks", "ok", "i see"
what advice do you dating pros have for me
what advice do you dating pros have for me
CanadianChic
Hall of Fame
Swissv2
Hall of Fame
so, is this your FIRST time you have ever had a girlfriend?
If you seriously want to end a long conversation that you have become "bored" with, then change the subject or close the the topic with a definitive remark, i.e. give your answer and state you have to get something done. You have to be sincere and honest, and don't cut her off - which will let her know that you are not intentionally trying to be rude.
If you seriously want to end a long conversation that you have become "bored" with, then change the subject or close the the topic with a definitive remark, i.e. give your answer and state you have to get something done. You have to be sincere and honest, and don't cut her off - which will let her know that you are not intentionally trying to be rude.
vkartikv
Hall of Fame
These things have to come from inside, you can't force them. You either have it or you don't. And since when did girls want men who can carry on a decent conversation anyway?? I thought all they wanted was for them to pay for dinner and whatever other expense they had.. Atleast, that's how the women in TX are...
CanadianChic
Hall of Fame
Hmm...or you could do what I do and say "k, I'm done now".
Swissv2
Hall of Fame
You are on a wicked little roll tonight OO.
On a roll to getting the girl angry and getting dumped the next week
Swissv2
Hall of Fame
CanadianChic
Hall of Fame
On a roll to getting the girl angry and getting dumped the next week
Very true Swissy. It is funny when it is not us he is blowing off though.
MomentumGT
Semi-Pro
HAHA! This is freakin' hilarious! If you don't have anything to talk about create a situation so you guys can talk about. IE go to a sporting event that you know she will like, or any outing that you know she will be into. Be comfortable and take a camera so it gives you an excuse to be goofy and you can then post it up on your stupid myspace account. Seriously...if she is indeed your girlfriend, there is probably a specific trait that she finds attractive in you. Be yourself and don't force the issue. Forced conversation always ends up with guys foot in his mouth. Any time you force something 'being yourself' gets thrown out the window and that one trait that attracted you to her is going to be lost. Ditch the interview questions and wing it. GL you'll need it.
-Jon
vkartikv
Hall of Fame
Maybe the particular women you date, who just want you for your money
That is the problem - I have none, yet!!! Atleast I know that the women who do go out with me do it for other reasons...
CanadianChic
Hall of Fame
Wow V, talk about stereotyping. Come on...I'll walk you through it...deep breath...let go of the bitterness...and release. Deep breath...let go of the bitterness...and breath out.
vkartikv
Hall of Fame
Thanks CC but there is no bitterness here, just reality and facts
Growing older by the day and finding it harder to meet someone intelligent, independent and strong.
CanadianChic
Hall of Fame
But we are out there V, there are tonnes of us. You just need to know where to look and try your best to leave the baggage at the door. Whatever happened to B.C.?
MomentumGT
Semi-Pro
Thanks CC but there is no bitterness here, just reality and facts
Then who's Julia?
-Jon
TheShaun
Hall of Fame
take her to a movie, no need to talk. then after you can talk about the movie...
vkartikv
Hall of Fame
Julia Stiles, of course!
vkartikv
Hall of Fame
What's B.C.?
CanadianChic
Hall of Fame
Exactly! Or simply enjoy the silence. Quiet moments are great when you don't feel a need to speak...sometimes it's okay to just be together without providing a word-by-word commentary the entire time. Stop thinking of the silences as awkward and instead view them as relaxing.
CanadianChic
Hall of Fame
I thought it was Julia Roberts.
Umm..British Columbia? Directly north of Washington state. My bad, for some reason I thought you had mentioned the possibility of a move a while back.
vkartikv
Hall of Fame
Yes, yes. I may have wasted some golden years in superficial/materialistic/conservative West Texas but I'm all set to move. I'm actually considering going back home or SE Asia. But if I was to be in North America it would have to be BC or somewhere else in Canada. BTW, I briefly dated this Slovak who changed my mind on a lot of things and has re-instated optimism. I am ready to move out and meet the more liberal women of the world...
TheShaun
Hall of Fame
i cherish the silient moments with my girl, and i know she does too. but i think early in the relationship they would have been slightly more uncomfortable.
MomentumGT
Semi-Pro
So the women in BC are liberal? I think I'm construing your definition of liberal
so explain.-Jon
vkartikv
Hall of Fame
Yes, I would love to - Dr. PLK who posts on these boards is a native as well. Is CC a Vancouverite(e)?
When have I, ahem, blown-off you wonderful people CC and Swissy? Apart from 5mins ago in the slurpee-post, anyways...
-- back to the date --
11:10am So, my darling GF, it was about now I was thinking of holding your hand. Would you care to perhaps intertwine your...
11:12am Big Mac and fries. That's what I was thinking of having for lunch. What about you, puppycakes? *attempts to flutter eyelids, but only has time for a quick blink, which looks rather like a spasm as he jumps to*
11:14 Did I mention I'm epileptic? Thankfully the medication now has me under control, I still have fits, but they only last for a short period
11:16am *has fit*
11:18am So what is it that you most like about me, sugar-plum?
GF: Well, i have always like your very deep and blue
11:20am Appendix scar? I thought so. I have loads of scars, you know. This one from when I fell off my bike, and this one that I pretend makes me emo.
11:22am Speaking of SCUBA, darling, which as you know stands for self-contained under-water breathing aparatii....
11:24am (Reminds self to take up a sport with a shorter name, so that can fit into a 2min topic, drops topic-plan on ground)
11:26am (Realises that sat there for the last 2 mins only thinking that, and thus the silence grows, fumbles for paper)
11:28am (Nervousness increases, silence lengthens)
GF: Well, I'd really like it if you'd unbutton my bra clasp..
11:30am Woohoo, I found it! (Not the bra clasp, the plan). So, are you in favour of stem-cell research?
vkartikv
Hall of Fame
So the women in BC are liberal? I think I'm construing your definition of liberal
-Jon
Believe me, after 6 yrs in this hole it couldn't get any worse. I did mention world, didn't I? I'm not restricting myself to BC unless CC has some plans up her sleeve
TheShaun
Hall of Fame
i may be mistaken but i think cc is from ontario or winnipeg. i just recently met plk, so to speak, we had e-mailed about a racquet he was offering for sale.
MomentumGT
Semi-Pro
Believe me, after 6 yrs in this hole it couldn't get any worse. I did mention world, didn't I? I'm not restricting myself to BC unless CC has some plans up her sleeve
How 'bout SoCal? We got a lot of liberal women here. LOL. But not now...the brush fires are raging out of control at the moment.
-Jon
Benjamin007
Banned
Just curious, how do you get your girlfriend when it seems you've a problem finding to talk with her. Is it only when face to face you've this kind of problem or also during in the phone conversation too
.Trying to help around
.
CanadianChic
Hall of Fame
Definitely not Ontario. I am more Winnipeg area but do spend a couple weeks a year in B.C. and am planning on moving to the west coast. B.C. is (IMO) the most relaxed, beautiful area of Canada and I love it!
OO, I meant not you blowing off Swiss and myself. You are amusing me very much tonight.
OO, I meant not you blowing off Swiss and myself. You are amusing me very much tonight.
TheShaun
Hall of Fame
winnipeg area? where's your ideal bc spot?
CanadianChic
Hall of Fame
I have a sister who lives in Burnaby, my father is in the Fraser Valley and I have aunts, uncles and cousins in the Okanagan valley. I really like the Chilliwack area but if I were to live there, probably Van.
ssjkyle31
Semi-Pro
Tell her what you like first example: Then try to open here up with questions
I really like to play tennis. I play atleast once or twice a week. So What do you like in sports? Her answer.... If it the answer is I don't know. Have you tried a sport like tennis? her answer..... etc....
I really like to play tennis. I play atleast once or twice a week. So What do you like in sports? Her answer.... If it the answer is I don't know. Have you tried a sport like tennis? her answer..... etc....
ananda
Semi-Pro
yes, but not in one shot. use one to get a conversation started. hopefully it'll get you talking till other topics pop up.
so you could use one a day, heheh.
i have the opposite problem with girls. they want to know each and every minute detail of my day, incl what i ate, and how it was made, and the recipe, and what i am weargin and where i bought it. and every artifact in my house and its history, and every moment of my past since the day i popped out.... i had to get off IM because of that.
i think its called "stalkng"!!!
Edit: See some woody allen movies. lol.
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TheShaun
Hall of Fame
very cool. i was in chilliwack just last week. it's so fresh out there.
hgb765
Rookie
wow i totally know what you're going through!
i like this guy but i only see him once a day in a class and sometimes in the hallway so we don't really get to hang out that often
i mean we're definitely friends and stuff and we talk etc but its hard to find things to talk about other then school...
and i can't exactly straight up ask him to hang out or anything cause that'd be awkward... so yeah i guess we'll see what happens
i like this guy but i only see him once a day in a class and sometimes in the hallway so we don't really get to hang out that often
i mean we're definitely friends and stuff and we talk etc but its hard to find things to talk about other then school...
and i can't exactly straight up ask him to hang out or anything cause that'd be awkward... so yeah i guess we'll see what happens
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