Guilty winning?

Just posted on usta teammates.. and I would like to be all happy go lucky around teammates but realizing that this is competition and need to play against your own teammates (basketball, football, etc is teamwork but singles tennis your opponent can be your teammate.. well.. duh..lol)
Anyhow, does anyone of you feel bad after you win and see the other guy have there spirits broken and body language show this and dont' want to talk... Just playing hard and coming on top but see your teammate who your playing against feel bad... I then feel bad also but realize I've been in that situation many times (still do) but eventually it does get shaken off.... So should i not worry and just see it as normal? or is this not normal and i've done something offense which i dont' think i have.. maybe im just misunderstood :neutral:

Only people I feel sorry for are the seniors that try to compete and can't. I always let up on them. Otherwise if your around my age and I can beat you to death, I do it. I do this because when I was getting beat to death it didn't seem to bother anyone. Not to mention I want everyone to think im the little caucasion version of Shaft........."that's one bad *****.....shut yo mouth"

When I play social tennis it is just that... social tennis. Winning is not as important to me as much as it is to enjoy the time spent on the court.

The bottom-line is I usually know how my skills matchup against those I am playing with and there is no reason to be crushing an opponent just to feed my ego. So I play for fun... and I can lose a lot... in these situations. However if I do get an egomanical player on the other side of the net, I will bring him/her down a little and I will do it with finesse with glimses of power. They usually realize quickly that they are not as good as they think... then we can go back to playing social tennis.

I'm similar to ALten1. The only "pity" I feel is for the folks that are trying, but just can't do it anymore. We'll all be there some day.

I don't get terribly emotional, win or lose. My goal is to play the cleanest, most efficient tennis I can, and if it's good enough to win that particular day, then great. Some people get too hung up on winning and losing, and even when they get beat by a better player, they look like their dog just died. I've never understood that.

Also, I don't mind beating someone to death, scorewise, if that's the way the match really should go. Even though we're all rated the same, sometimes you get someone that you'll just dominate. But to go easy on them and give them games and stuff deprives them of the learning experience. And I don't mean that as a joke. I've been more motivated to improve after taking a good butt kicking than if I lost 5 and 6. I don't like to double bagel anyone though, I'll usually throw a game if it's going that bad for them.

I don't want anyone taking it easy on me. If they can beat me bad (and it's been done many times) then so be it. I get way more out of getting someone's total game than them playing around with me. I don't know about you MrClean but someone giving me charity does nothing for me, so I don't give any.

yeah i don't mind letting up if i see someone really in pain.. but then again i've been there.. and i never took it personally and just saw him demolish me so pretty shouldn't worry giving games and play hard to the end...

I play a guy that has been getting really depressed lately when he's been losing. Normally, I would let it be his problem, but he's such a nice guy and I would rather take it easy on him than see him retrieving balls with that slumped-shoulders, beaten down look. I just can't take the depressed talks at the turnover either. It's worth hitting the back to him a few times - just to keep his spirits up. Eventually he will either quit our league, or get better (I hope.)

i wish i had the luxury of being able to go easy on people and still win

If you let up in practice then you will let up in a match. I don't live on the tennis court so when i get to play the person I am playing is going to get all I got. Otherwise I can stay home and play tennis on the Wii with my daughter.

ALten1 said:

I don't know about you MrClean but someone giving me charity does nothing for me, so I don't give any.

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I wouldn't call it charity. I'm content to stab someone in the heart, whereas it sounds like you like to twist it a bit once it's in there.

Ripper014 said:

When I play social tennis it is just that... social tennis. Winning is not as important to me as much as it is to enjoy the time spent on the court.

The bottom-line is I usually know how my skills matchup against those I am playing with and there is no reason to be crushing an opponent just to feed my ego. So I play for fun... and I can lose a lot... in these situations. However if I do get an egomanical player on the other side of the net, I will bring him/her down a little and I will do it with finesse with glimses of power. They usually realize quickly that they are not as good as they think... then we can go back to playing social tennis.

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My philosophy.

Golf anyone?

Bashi said:

i wish i had the luxury of being able to go easy on people and still win

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This is what I was thinking. I don't play against someone I know for sure I can beat badly - it's not any fun for either of us. If I get walloped by someone who's my equal, or a better player, I consider it a learning experience and no reason to feel depressed. Lighten up!!! It's a fun game.

We have some older players at our club who have mobility problems and arthritis and such, and if I find one of them in my doubles game (they don't play singles anymore) I don't pick on them, and I don't try to blast them off the court. Got to have some respect, there - and as someone else said, I hope that when I'm 70+, I'll still have people to play with! Otherwise I'll have to take up (gulp) - GOOOOOLLLF.

I have felt bad if I beat one of my friends pretty bad but not in league or a practice league match. The reason is many league team players won't want to play with the weaker players so look at it this way. All the ones you take out will want to be your partner come doubles time.

If the guys are on your team, and rated equally, beat them as best you can and don't pull back. You have to show them where they need improvement - and yes, they will think about how they lost and what they need to work on if they are really trying to improve. I assume leauge players want to improve. If not, you need to know where they fit in the team perspective.

Only in social matches, with seniors who seriously can't move would I take things down a notch. A lot of the one's I play with used to be good solid 4.0 but are debilitated by bad knees and back issues now. No need to school the ones who used to teach us.

I enjoy a good tennis match, win or lose. If my opponent feels bad losing it's too bad that he doesn't understand the true nature of competition, but I wouldn't feel bad about my winning. He's got to learn what competition is all about, letting him win would just be enabling him. There's more to competing than: winning = good, losing = bad.

I have never felt bad whupping up one someone, and while I don't overly enjoy getting blown off the court, I view it as a learning experience. In fact, if someone does beat me badly, or often, I will keep playing that person as often as they want to, until I improve to the point that I can beat them. The guys you beat need to learn from the losses, and you should not hold back in providing them the lessons.
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